Confusion can be one of the loudest warning signs, especially when a relationship leaves you doubting your memory, your emotions, and your sense of self. I’m joined by Carine Van Hee, an artist, author, and speaker whose work shines a clear light on emotional manipulation, toxic relationship patterns, and the subtle ways control can masquerade as love. If you’ve ever thought, “Is it me?”, this conversation gives you language for what felt impossible to explain. We talk about why many unhealthy relationships don’t start with obvious red flags. Carine breaks down the early “lovely” stage, how love bombing can push intimacy at high speed, and why that rush can set up isolation and control. We also draw a sharp line between ordinary conflict and abuse: conflict still has respect and repair, while abuse runs on a power imbalance where one person keeps the upper hand and makes the other carry the blame. Along the way, we name common tactics like gaslighting and silent treatment, and why rumination can be a clue that something deeper is wrong. Healing is not instant, and we don’t pretend it is. Carine shares what it takes to rebuild self-trust, including noticing the abuser’s voice that lingers in everyday decisions and learning to interrupt mental loops. We also explore creativity as a practical path back to the body and back to intuition, whether that’s painting, knitting, cooking, sketching, or any form of making that helps you feel safe again. Carine also explains what readers will find in her book, “Is It Me: The Hidden System Behind Toxic Relationships,” designed to help people recognize the pattern and choose their next step with clarity. If this resonates, subscribe for more conversations on change, self-trust, and creating what comes next, then share this episode with someone who might need it and leave a review so more listeners can find support. Connect with Carine Website Instagram Facebook and LinkedIn Let me know what you’d like to hear more about on the show Support the show I’m Carol Clegg, a life coach offering gentle accountability coaching and I am a curious conversationalist. If you enjoy reflection, fresh perspectives, and honest dialogue, this space is for you. If you’d like to experience this work in community, I host a complimentary monthly Accountability Circle a supportive space to pause, gain clarity, and choose a gentle next step forward. More info at https://carolclegg.com/accountabilitycircle For those ready for deeper, more consistent support, I also offer a 60-day Accountability Package, designed to help you move from scattered ideas to steady, sustainable momentum. You can learn more at carolclegg.com Let’s connect on LinkedIn and Instagram, or join my LinkedIn Group Flourish: A Community for Women Business Owners
