Medium Lady Talks: Burnout Recovery for Millennials and Mothers

Erin Vandeven
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Welcome to Medium Lady Talks, the podcast for burnt-out millennial moms who want to reclaim their time, energy, and joy—without the pressure of perfection. Host Erin, a working mom and mindful living advocate, shares refreshingly honest conversations and practical strategies to help you navigate motherhood, career, and self-care with medium effort. If you’re overwhelmed by unrealistic expectations and craving a more sustainable approach to life, you’re in the right place. Tune in for relatable insights on burnout recovery, self-care that actually fits your life, simplifying daily routines, and embracing imperfection with confidence. Through thought-provoking discussions, expert interviews, and personal reflections, Medium Lady Talks is your go-to resource for mindful, realistic growth—because you deserve a fulfilling life, not just a busy one. Let’s ditch the guilt, redefine success, and find joy in the small moments. Follow Erin on Instagram @medium.lady and start your journey to a more intentional, balanced life today.

  1. 4D AGO

    Episode 168: The Micro Rituals Saving Me This Winter

    How do you move through winter without numbing out, gritting your teeth, or waiting for spring to fix you? In this episode of Medium Lady Talks, Erin shares the small but powerful micro-rituals helping her stay present, intentional, and connected to herself during one of the heaviest seasons she’s had in years. This isn’t about productivity hacks. It’s not about aesthetic morning routines. And it’s definitely not about toxic positivity. It’s about participation. If winter often feels narrowing — emotionally, mentally, culturally — this episode explores how small, deliberate practices can widen your thinking, reduce decision fatigue, and help you reclaim your point of view in a season that tempts many of us toward passive consumption and burnout. In This Episode, You’ll Learn: Why micro-rituals can be more powerful than big resolutions How reducing decision fatigue supports mental health in winter The difference between consuming inspiration and activating it Why analog living isn’t aesthetic — it’s neurological How music appreciation can retrain your attention span The benefits of slow reading and commonplace journaling What critical thinking actually is (and why it matters now more than ever) How asking “What do I think?” can protect your identity in overwhelming seasons The Three Micro-Rituals Erin Shares: 1️⃣ Activating Inspiration Instead of Saving It Using simple outfit formulas (inspired by creator Laura Owens) to eliminate decision fatigue and translate digital inspiration into real-life embodiment. The power isn’t in watching someone else get dressed — it’s in getting dressed. 2️⃣ Music Appreciation as Attention Training Moving beyond background noise to study instrumentation, arrangement, and emotion in music — and how building a “cinematic winter playlist” creates presence and pleasure without productivity. Inspired again by an amazing creator Owen Cutts !! 3️⃣ Slow Reading + Journaling for Deeper Thinking Pairing fiction and nonfiction, tracking themes, and practicing commonplace journaling to metabolize ideas rather than speed-consume books. Why This Matters Winter often reveals our overload. When the world feels heavy and cultural panic is escalating, it becomes easier to outsource our thinking, scroll instead of reflect, and numb instead of participate. These micro-rituals are small daily acts of resistance: Resistance to burnout Resistance to passive living Resistance to losing your point of view They are not dramatic. They are not monetizable. They are not optimized. But they are helping Erin feel like herself in one of the hardest winters she’s had in a long time. And maybe they can help you too. A Gentle Invitation If you’re feeling narrow, constricted, or numbed out this winter, ask yourself: What do I think? What do I want? Where is my attention going? You don’t have to reinvent your life. You don’t have to survive on autopilot. Choose one small ritual that shifts you from passive to deliberate. From outsourcing your mind to inhabiting it. Winter doesn’t have to take everything from you. 🎧 Listen now and share this episode with someone who needs a life raft this season. If this resonated, screenshot the episode and tag @medium.lady on Instagram so we can talk about it. You’re doing such a good job. Connect with Erin: Instagram: @medium.lady Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady  Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com  Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify Instagram: @mediumladyreads

    27 min

  2. FEB 17

    Episode 167: Why Women Admit Their Burnout in the Winter

    Winter doesn’t create burnout. It reveals it. In this episode of Medium Lady Talks, Erin explores why so many women quietly admit their exhaustion during the cold months — not because winter breaks them, but because winter strips away the distractions that helped them outrun what they’ve been carrying all along. Drawing on personal reflection, cultural observation, and insights from All We Want Is Everything by Soraya Chemaly, this episode unpacks: Why women are socialized to absorb emotional fallout and smooth discomfort How invisible emotional labor accumulates quietly across seasons Why reduced light, stimulation, and dopamine in winter make burnout undeniable The seductive pull of despair and doomscrolling Why “collapse” in January isn’t the same as rest And how to redistribute your load instead of reinventing yourself This is not an episode about hustling your way out of exhaustion. It’s about recognizing when winter is revealing a structural mismatch between what you carry and what you are resourced for — and responding gently but honestly. If you’ve felt bone tired. Soul tired. Existentially tired. This episode will help you see your burnout not as weakness — but as information. What You’ll Hear in This Episode Why winter reduces capacity and exposes overload Emotional labor and the cultural conditioning of women How smoothing and anticipating needs compounds exhaustion The rise of “analog wellness” as nervous system relief The 1% rule for sustainable adjustment Practical ways to drop invisible tasks Why spring doesn’t fix structural mismatch — redistribution does A Gentle Invitation Name what you’re carrying. Drop one invisible task. Replace one scroll with one analog act. Aim for 1% more steadiness. Winter is not attacking you. It may just be asking you to notice. If this episode resonated, share it with someone who’s been quietly holding too much. And as always — you are not weak for feeling this. You are overloaded. And overload can be adjusted.   Connect with Erin: Instagram: @medium.lady Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com  Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads."  Instagram: @mediumladyreads Website: www.mediumladycommunity.com

    31 min

  3. FEB 9

    Episode 166: Happy In the Winter (Especially When the World is On Fire)

    Winter can be heavy — physically, emotionally, politically, spiritually. And for many of us, January in particular can feel destabilizing, tender, and overwhelming. In this opening episode of Season 6, Erin shares honestly about where she’s been this winter: a painful injury, heightened fear and grief, and the emotional toll of witnessing human suffering in the world. She names what it feels like to be sad, scared, and grieving — while still feeling like herself. This episode introduces the guiding idea for the season: happiness is not forced optimism or denial — it’s orientation. It’s about where we allow our attention to return, even when things are not fine. Rather than chasing positivity, Erin invites listeners into a gentle, non-judgmental practice: choosing a word for the winter — not as a goal or personality test, but as a lens to widen perspective and soften the edges of a difficult season. This episode is for anyone who: feels emotionally porous or overwhelmed this winter is tired of performative positivity wants language for being distressed without being lost is looking for steadiness, beauty, and connection in small, human ways You don’t need to feel happy all the time. You don’t need to fix the winter. You’re allowed to move through it — one day at a time — with a little more capacity than yesterday. Mentioned in this episode: The concept of orientation vs. optimism Seasonal emotional patterns and January destabilization Choosing a word for the winter (Erin’s word: cinematic) Happiness as a North Star, not a destination Listener Invitation: Choose a word for your winter. Let it guide what you notice (light, movement, connection, meaning) without judgment or pressure to share.   Connect with Erin: Instagram: @medium.lady Email: vandeven.erin@gmail.com  Website: www.mediumladycommunity.com Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify Instagram: @mediumladyreads

    21 min

  4. JAN 5 · BONUS

    [BONUS]: I’m Not Waiting Anymore: A Quiet Reflection for 2026

    What if you didn’t end the year with a big goal — but with clarity? In this quiet bonus episode closing out Season 5 of Medium Lady Talks, Erin shares a personal year-in-review reflection inspired by Laura Tremaine’s 10 Questions for the End of the Year. Rather than offering resolutions or strategies, this episode explores what happens when we stop waiting for permission, external validation, or the “right time” to move forward. Erin reflects on her word for 2026 and what it means to live from inner authority instead of urgency. She unpacks three gentle but powerful realizations from the past year: why rescuing isn’t leadership, why depth matters more than speed, and why self-trust can be more radical than having a plan. This episode is for anyone ending the year without a bold intention — and feeling oddly okay about it. If you’re craving permission to slow down, listen inward, and trust yourself before chasing the next strategy, this conversation is for you. What You’ll Hear in This Episode What Erin chose as her word for 2026 — and what it actually means for her year ahead. The hidden cost of being the rescuer at work, in family life, and in relationships Choosing depth and rest without abandoning ambition Letting go of urgency, perfectionism, and incomplete projects without self-judgment Why self-trust can be more grounding than goal-setting A compassionate reframe for listeners who feel unsure about what’s next Notable Quotes “I realized I’ve been waiting for something that doesn’t exist — permission, legitimacy, or other people catching up.” “Rescuing isn’t leadership. Rising up without abandoning myself is.” “I didn’t end this year with a strategy. I ended it with self-trust — and that feels more radical.” “You’re not behind. You might just be listening to yourself on a new level.” Who This Episode Is For Burnt-out women and millennial mothers navigating ambition and rest Listeners who feel pressure to set goals but crave something quieter Anyone tired of hustle culture and performative self-improvement Leaders, caregivers, and creatives who are ready to stop waiting for permission Mentioned in This Episode Laura Tremaine’s 10 Questions for the End of the Year reflection practice The Summer of Real Rest theme and its lasting impact The idea of “negotiating the timeline, not the result” What to Do Next If something resonated: Sit with a word that stood out to you Notice where you’re done rushing or rescuing Ask yourself where you might trust yourself a little sooner There’s no homework here — just space. Connect with Erin Follow along on Instagram for more reflections, bookish content, and gentle encouragement: @medium.lady If this episode spoke to you, screenshot it and share it — and tag Erin so you can continue the conversation.

    18 min

  5. 12/31/2025

    Episode 165 Walking Away from the Myth of the Superwoman with guest Dr. Nikia Smith

    What happens when being “strong” stops working? In this deeply affirming and practical conversation, Erin is joined by Dr. Nikia Smith — practicing anesthesiologist, wellness coach, and founder of She Is Fire Forged — to explore how the Superwoman myth quietly fuels burnout, especially for high-achieving women and women in healthcare. Together, they unpack how resilience, people-pleasing, and productivity can become liabilities rather than strengths — and why rest is not something to earn, but something to prioritize before everything else. This episode is for anyone who: feels exhausted despite “doing everything right” has built a good life but still feels depleted or disconnected has been praised for being strong, capable, and reliable — at great personal cost 🧠 In This Episode, You’ll Hear About: • The hidden cost of the Superwoman identity Dr. Smith explains how being “the strong one” often masks chronic exhaustion, emotional suppression, and self-abandonment — particularly for women of color and women in caregiving professions. • Burnout doesn’t always look like collapse You can love your job, love your life, and still be burned out. Burnout often builds slowly — like a simmer — long before it reaches a breaking point. • Why rest must come before boundaries Many women struggle to set boundaries because they’re already depleted. Dr. Smith shares why beginning with rest builds the capacity and courage needed to sustain boundaries over time. • The ‘simmer’ metaphor for catching burnout early Instead of waiting for total collapse, this episode offers language for identifying irritability, restlessness, resentment, and exhaustion before burnout boils over. • The difference between sleep and real rest Sleep matters — but it’s not the whole picture. Emotional rest, creative rest, social rest, and physical rest all play distinct roles in recovery and sustainability. • How identity work is central to burnout recovery Burnout often forces the question: Who am I beyond my roles and titles? This episode explores how dismantling inherited expectations opens space for self-trust and agency. 🔄 Reframing Strength, Productivity, and Success This conversation challenges the idea that: rest must be earned productivity defines worth success looks the same for everyone Instead, Erin and Dr. Smith explore how true sustainability often means: adding friction at work removing friction at home offloading invisible labor questioning “shoulds” that drain energy without adding meaning You’ll also hear honest reflections on: outsourcing household labor redefining success based on values (not aesthetics) letting go of guilt around support, rest, and ease 🌿 Key Takeaways Burnout is not a personal failure — it’s often the result of social conditioning and moral injury You don’t need confidence to make changes; courage is enough Rest creates the capacity needed to move from survival to intention You are allowed to want a life that feels good, not just one that looks successful Strength doesn’t mean doing everything alone 🩺 About Today’s Guest: Dr. Nikia Smith Dr. Nikia Smith is a practicing anesthesiologist, wellness coach, and founder of She Is Fire Forged, a platform supporting high-achieving women of color through burnout recovery, rest, and self-trust. Through her coaching and content, she helps women: identify hidden burnout unlearn the need to earn rest build sustainable lives rooted in clarity and softness Connect with Dr. Smith: Instagram & TikTok: @sheisfireforged Email: @medium.lady Explore more episodes of Medium Lady Talks for grounded conversations about rest, burnout recovery, identity, and sustainable living. And remember: Rest is not weakness. It’s a right.

    55 min

  6. 12/22/2025

    Episode 164: Living the Life You Worked Hard to Build - Wrapping Phone Free Fall and Reflections on Winter Solstice

    On the winter solstice — the darkest day of the year — Erin closes the Phone Free Fall series with a quiet, honest reflection on presence, capacity, and what it means to actually live inside the life you worked so hard to build. This episode isn’t about advice, challenges, or optimizing your habits. It’s about noticing. About naming the ways we slip out of our own lives — into scrolling, distraction, and emotional distance — not because our lives are bad, but because they are full. If you’ve felt restless, overstimulated, or disconnected even while living a life you once dreamed of, this episode offers orientation, not pressure. A reminder that real life isn’t something you get to later — it’s already happening, and you’re allowed to be inside it. 🧠 In This Episode, Erin Reflects On: • Why Phone Free Fall was never about quitting your phone This series was about noticing how often we leave our lives without realizing it — and gently choosing to come back. • The paradox of living a “good” life and still wanting to escape it Full lives are often heavy to inhabit. Phones offer distance and numbness, but not true restoration. • How rest, capacity, and phone use are deeply connected Even when we rest, our phones can quietly drain the capacity that rest is meant to restore. • What listeners discovered when screen time went down Pride, boredom, boredom with scrolling — and then a strange, honest sense of being lost. Not a failure, but a re-entry. • Why winter — and the solstice in particular — asks us to stay, not optimize This season invites inwardness, stillness, and tolerance for what feels unfinished or unresolved. • The practice at the heart of Phone Free Fall Not discipline. Not restriction. Just noticing when you leave your life — and when you come back. ❄️ A Winter Solstice Reframe The solstice doesn’t ask us to improve or shine. It asks us to stay. Just as the light returns slowly — almost imperceptibly — presence returns minute by minute. With each moment we’re less interrupted. With each moment we choose to be here. 💬 Key Takeaways You’re not escaping your life because it’s bad — you’re escaping because it’s full Distance from your phone isn’t the same as restoration, but it can create space for it Boredom and quiet are not problems; they’re thresholds Your real life isn’t waiting for you to feel better — it’s already happening You’re allowed to live inside the life you built, even when it’s imperfect, slow, or overwhelming Noticing is the practice 🌿 As Phone Free Fall Comes to a Close As Erin wraps both Phone Free Fall and Season 5 of Medium Lady Talks, she invites listeners into a winter pause — one that makes room for quiet, reflection, and enoughness. You don’t need to do this better. You don’t need more discipline. You just need to keep noticing. 🎧 What’s Next Episode 165: A conversation with physician and coach Dr. Nikia Smith on rest, boundaries, and care that actually sustains us Season 6 of Medium Lady Talks returns in February after a January winter hiatus 🧡 Continue the Conversation If this episode resonated, Erin would love to hear from you — especially how Phone Free Fall shifted your awareness, not just your screen time. Follow along on Instagram: @medium.lady And thank you for choosing to spend your time and attention here — they matter.

    20 min

  7. 12/16/2025

    Episode 163: When Phone Boundaries Bring Up Feelings (And What to Do About It)

    You put your phone down. Your screen time went down. And instead of feeling calm or proud… you felt bored. Then scrolling felt boring too. And suddenly, you felt lost. If that’s been your experience, this episode is for you. In this Phone Free Fall conversation, Erin explores why setting phone boundaries can bring up unexpected emotions — and why feeling bored, unsettled, or untethered is not a sign you’re failing. It’s a sign that your nervous system is recalibrating. This episode connects phone boundaries, emotional rest, and seasonal sensory grounding, helping you understand what’s happening in your body and how to stay supported without reaching for your phone again. 🧠 In This Episode, We Explore: • Why phone boundaries often trigger emotions Your phone hasn’t just been entertainment — it’s been a tool for emotional regulation. When you reduce screen time, the constant drip of distraction stops, and feelings finally have space to surface. • Why boredom is a normal (and necessary) phase Boredom isn’t emptiness. It’s a transition point between overstimulation and genuine interest. Feeling bored or “lost” doesn’t mean you need your phone back — it means your brain is adjusting. • The emotional gap most digital wellness advice ignores Lower stimulation doesn’t instantly feel better. It often feels unfamiliar, quiet, and disorienting. This episode names that gap so you don’t mistake it for failure. • What emotional rest actually looks like Emotional rest isn’t fixing your feelings, journaling perfectly, or staying positive. It’s letting emotions exist without immediately managing, numbing, or distracting from them. • How to support yourself without scrolling Erin shares gentle ways to stay regulated when phone boundaries bring up discomfort — including sensory grounding, seasonal rhythms, and body-based cues that don’t require more effort or discipline. 🍂 Seasonal Support: Staying Grounded Without Your Phone This episode invites you to reconnect with sensory joys of the season as a way to support emotional rest, including: warmth, light, and texture slow, repetitive tasks (cooking, baking, tidying) movement and fresh air cozy, low-stakes rituals noticing what feels comforting instead of productive Winter already knows how to slow us down — we don’t need to force calm, just notice it. 💬 Key Takeaways Feeling bored or lost after reducing screen time is normal Your phone has been regulating your nervous system — replacing it gently matters Emotional rest begins when we stop interrupting ourselves You don’t need more discipline — you need more support Phone Free Fall isn’t about quitting your phone; it’s about rebuilding tolerance for being with yourself 🧡 If This Episode Resonated If this episode helped you make sense of how you’re feeling, consider sharing it with someone navigating phone boundaries too. And if you’re in the middle of Phone Free Fall, Erin would love to hear not just your screen time wins — but how it actually feels. 📱 Continue the Conversation Follow Erin on Instagram: @medium.lady Join the ongoing Phone Free Fall series and explore what real rest looks like — emotionally, mentally, and digitally. 🔗 Related Episodes Your Brain Is Full: Why You Can’t Put Your Phone Down (and It’s Not Your Fault) Who Knew Quitting Would Be This Hard? (Phone Free Fall check-in)

    31 min

  8. 12/09/2025

    Episode 162: Your Brain is Full - Why You Can't Put Your Phone Down but It's Not Your Fault

    If you’ve ever wondered why you can’t stop picking up your phone, especially in December, this is the episode you need. Erin breaks down the real reason you feel overstimulated, resentful, or stuck in the doomscroll — and spoiler: it’s not a lack of willpower. Your brain is just full. In this Phone Free Fall episode, Erin explores how emotional labour, holiday chaos, mental load, and constant interruptions shape your relationship with your phone — and what to do when putting it down actually makes your anxiety spike. If you’re craving validation AND practical tools, this one’s for you. 🔎 In This Episode, We Explore: • Why your phone isn’t the problem — your full brain is Erin explains why scrolling becomes an “emotional release valve” when life feels overstimulating. • The hidden forces making December uniquely overwhelming Holiday interruptions, childcare changes, gift logistics, sensory overload, financial pressure, and emotional labour all combine into a perfect mental-load storm. • The surprising signs your brain is full Including: – opening apps automatically – feeling buzzy or urgent for no reason – shame about unfinished simple tasks – multitasking even when you don’t need to – craving constant noise – scrolling while physically uncomfortable – feeling brittle, resentful, or tapped out • Why phone boundaries often feel worse before they feel better Silence gets louder, feelings surface, and thoughts crowd in — Erin explains why this is normal and not a sign you're doing anything wrong. • Compassion-based phone boundaries (especially for December) Small, realistic steps for navigating screen time during an emotionally maximalist month. ✨ Practical Tools Mentioned Micro-pauses before opening apps Opal App (iPhone) for screen time blocking Landline Mode and “move the app” techniques Slow-drip dopamine: reading, journaling, hobbies, rest Medium-effort December as an antidote to holiday burnout Letting your brain empty gently, not urgently 💬 Key Quotes from the Episode “You’re not glued to your phone because you’re weak. You’re glued to your phone because your brain is full.” “Doomscrolling creates emotional slipperiness — nothing sticks, and that feels like rest.” “December asks for maximum everything. Of course your brain is over capacity.” “The person who has a full brain has a full life. You worked hard for this life — don’t treat it like something you need to escape.” 🧡 If Your Brain Is Full Right Now… You’re doing your best. You’re not behind. You’re not undisciplined. You’re not broken. You’re overstimulated — and this episode will help you name it, understand it, and navigate it with compassion. 📱 Continue the Conversation Come hang out with Erin on Instagram: @medium.lady Share this episode with someone whose brain is also full — it helps the show grow and supports women who need exactly this kind of honesty and gentleness.

    26 min
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About

Welcome to Medium Lady Talks, the podcast for burnt-out millennial moms who want to reclaim their time, energy, and joy—without the pressure of perfection. Host Erin, a working mom and mindful living advocate, shares refreshingly honest conversations and practical strategies to help you navigate motherhood, career, and self-care with medium effort. If you’re overwhelmed by unrealistic expectations and craving a more sustainable approach to life, you’re in the right place. Tune in for relatable insights on burnout recovery, self-care that actually fits your life, simplifying daily routines, and embracing imperfection with confidence. Through thought-provoking discussions, expert interviews, and personal reflections, Medium Lady Talks is your go-to resource for mindful, realistic growth—because you deserve a fulfilling life, not just a busy one. Let’s ditch the guilt, redefine success, and find joy in the small moments. Follow Erin on Instagram @medium.lady and start your journey to a more intentional, balanced life today.

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