How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

Dr Maryhan

Hello, I'm psychologist and parenting expert Dr Maryhan and this is How Not To Screw Up Your Kids, the podcast for parents, grandparents, educators, and anyone else who wants to be part of a movement to raise confident children who grow up believing in themselves. Follow now for twice weekly episodes - on Monday's you'll find shorter Bucket Emptying episodes, with longer episodes each Thursday. The greatest gift we can give our children is self-belief. It will get them further in life than any qualification and is absolutely possible for each and every child; we just need the right information and support around us to teach them. The old saying ‘it takes a village to raise a child” couldn’t be more true than now. Parenting has got a whole lot harder; not just because we are busier than ever but because our children are growing up in an ever changing, fast-paced world, which is so different to the one we grew up in. Our children have more pressure to be better, look better, do better, and in a world where lives are so publicly scrutinised and commented on through social media it’s really no wonder we’re seeing mental health problems sky rocketing amongst children, teens, and young adults. What you can expect from this podcast are honest conversations about parenting. We’ll talk confidence resilience, anxiety, managing tech, and all the topics you’d expect as well blowing the lid off the widely help misconception that children are innately resilient. They’re not! This podcast is for people who want to get real about parenting. You understand it can get messy sometimes and aren’t afraid to admit it. I have had more than my fair share of messy and I will no doubt share these with you along the way. I won’t dress things up but I will always give you something practical to take away and use in each and every episode. My guests and experts will be real people who have overcome their own adversities and bring with them a message to us as parents, as well as inspiring stories. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation... We'd love to hear from you! We want to hear what you love and what you don't love about the podcast, so we can keep making it better: https://podcastsurvey.typeform.com/to/SEyYrxGB Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  1. Bucket Emptying: Grabbing the Opportunity

    1D AGO

    Bucket Emptying: Grabbing the Opportunity

    The UK government has opened a public consultation on a potential social media ban for under 16 year olds, and this creates a huge opportunity for us. It’s not just about giving our opinion to government, but as parents we now have a real chance to connect with our kids like never before. What is their opinion on this? How do they feel? What matters to them, and why? This is chance for us to encourage our children to find a voice, and learn how to speak up for themselves whilst respecting others opinions, even if they disagree with them. And in this episode I share six reasons why this discussion is so important, and give you some practical tips to help you, as you navigate this tricky subject with your own kids. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Mentioned in this episode: Why I Now Believe in a Social Media Ban - https://drmaryhan.com/why-i-now-believe-in-a-social-media-ban-for-under-16s/  Highlights from this episode: 00:53 - The social media ban 03:44 - See how your child sees things 07:54 - Having an opinion 10:16 - Using your voice 12:50 - An opportunity to shape the outcome 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    16 min
  2. 9 Modelled Bevahiours Boosting Academic Success, Confidence & Friendships

    5D AGO

    9 Modelled Bevahiours Boosting Academic Success, Confidence & Friendships

    If you have not yet watched American skier Eileen Gu’s interview following her silver medal at the recent Winter Olympics, click the link below, because it blew me away! Her confidence and self-assuredness is an amazing example to lots of young people, especially young women and girls, and it got me thinking… are there common actions or traits of parents who raise successful, confident children? We’re going to find out! In this episode I am going to focus specifically on behaviours that boost academic success, confidence and friendships, and give you three practical tips for each. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Mentioned in this episode: Eileen Gu Interview - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAhmzgTSBTI  Highlights from this episode: 00:31 - Eileen Gu 05:17 - The Bobo Doll Experiment 10:28 - Modelling academic success 13:02 - Persistence over perfection 16:48 - Confidence is an inside job 19:19 - Model realistic confidence 24:17 - Friendship Jenga 27:16 - Model healthy friendships 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    32 min
  3. Bucket Emptying: Parenting in Public

    MAR 2

    Bucket Emptying: Parenting in Public

    Children should be seen and not heard. Do you agree? We’ve all heard that expression, and we were all probably told this by our own parents! But I have noticed more and more examples of adult only areas of public spaces - on trains or in shopping malls - so I wanted to tackle this head on. For the record, I don’t agree with that saying, and in this episode I am going to share five reasons why it is better for us and our children when we encourage and support them to be included. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Highlights from this episode: 01:26 - Seen but not heard 03:17 - Learning on the job 08:52 - Plan A, B, and C 14:16 - Focus on what you CAN control 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    17 min
  4. Managing Emotional Outbursts

    FEB 26

    Managing Emotional Outbursts

    Outbursts, tantrums, meltdowns… whatever you call them, they’re not fun! But your kids are not hardwired to deal with their emotions, it’s a skill they learn over time, and it’s your job as parent to support them and encourage them to develop those skills. It’s not easy - I can attest to that, having raised two kids myself! And that’s why in this episode I help you understand what causes emotional outbursts, how these present themselves in different ages and stages, and what you can do to support them. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Highlights from this episode: 00:59 - Fear of judgement 02:32 - Emotional regulation is learned 07:43 - Verbal and physical escalations 10:35 - The teen years 14:08 - The biggest causes of emotional outbursts 18:23 - How to handle outbursts 23:10 - Keep them safe 27:17 - What is the skills gap? 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    32 min
  5. Bucket Emptying: Pocket Money - 5 Benefits You May Not Have Considered

    FEB 23

    Bucket Emptying: Pocket Money - 5 Benefits You May Not Have Considered

    Should I give my children pocket money? How much is enough? Should they have to earn it through chores? Knowing how much, when, and what can feel like a tricky minefield when thinking about pocket money for our kids. Some of you might decide simply not to do it, and that’s ok too. I can’t give you the right answer, because only you know what’s best for your family, but in this bucket emptying episode, I’m going to share five benefits of pocket money, from emotional regulation to financial skills, that might just help you find the answers you’re looking for. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Highlights from this episode: 01:09 - Linking pocket money to chores 03:30 - Don’t eat the marshmallow! 05:29 - Opportunity cost 08:36 - Pocket money builds emotional regulation 11:04 - Finance and social conscience 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    17 min
  6. Confidence is on the Decline

    FEB 19

    Confidence is on the Decline

    Did you know 1 in 3 children have little or no confidence? Did you know girls are more likely to downplay their confidence? And did you know that children from non-white and minority ethnic groups are likely to have less confidence than their white male friends? Today I speak to Kathryn McColl, co-founder of Hark, the education agency that delivers programmes to over 90% of UK schools. Hark recently published their Listen Up report, which collected anonymous data from 1,400 children across the UK to better understand what they call the ‘confidence crisis.’ I drill down into some of their jaw-dropping insights, including the above, as we discuss why confidence appears to be on the decline among young people. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Connect with Kathryn: More about Hark - https://harklondon.com/  Get the Listen Up Report - https://harklondon.com/listen-up/  Connect on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/kathryn-mccoll-5a918329/  Highlights from this episode: 02:32 - What is Hark? 05:43 - Confidence means opportunity 11:08 - The impact of role models 15:11 - Transitioning from primary to secondary school 21:46 - Friction teaches confidence 27:09 - Post exam stress 29:37 - Girls hide their confidence 33:37 - The confidence ladder 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    40 min
  7. Bucket Emptying: Parenting Trends and How They Affect Our Own Parenting

    FEB 16

    Bucket Emptying: Parenting Trends and How They Affect Our Own Parenting

    From gentle parenting to FAFO, social media bombards us with content about the latest trends, so how do you really know what works and what doesn’t? In today’s bucket emptying episode, I talk you through some of the biggest parenting trends, and explain how they can be impacting you, and the ways in which you might then choose to parent your own kids. Because parenting is all-consuming. It’s a 24/7/365 gig, and the trends of day, whether we subscribe to them or not, can feel like they define us as parents. I’m here to tell you they don’t! So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Highlights from this episode: 00:48 - FAFO Parenting 03:30 - Are we defined by the trends? 06:23 - Labels take away the overwhelm 09:56 - There’s no one size fits all approach 12:35 - Parental intuition 15:22 - Science vs media 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    22 min
  8. Let's Talk - 5 Ways to Start a Conversation About Mental Health

    FEB 12

    Let's Talk - 5 Ways to Start a Conversation About Mental Health

    Mental health is not just a buzz word, and oftentimes it goes hand in hand with physical health. But because we can’t see mental health, as parents it can be so easy to procrastinate these important conversations that provide a safe, supportive space for our children to really get honest with us. Whether you’re listening to this during Children’s Mental Health week or at any other time of the year, these practical tips will really help you to kickstart conversations about mental health with your family. It might not be easy, and it might take some time, but I promise you if you persevere and remain patient, your kids will eventually feel comfortable enough to talk to you. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation… Mentioned in this episode: Children’s Mental Health Week: https://www.childrensmentalhealthweek.org.uk/  Highlights from this episode: 01:15 - Physical health IS mental health 03:41 - I’ve noticed that… 07:17 - How are you feeling? 10:30 - Use books 15:09 - Teachable moments 16:38 - Talk out loud 18:46 - 3 things to consider 💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together 💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/  💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library  💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025 💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com  DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    25 min

Ratings & Reviews

4.9
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

Hello, I'm psychologist and parenting expert Dr Maryhan and this is How Not To Screw Up Your Kids, the podcast for parents, grandparents, educators, and anyone else who wants to be part of a movement to raise confident children who grow up believing in themselves. Follow now for twice weekly episodes - on Monday's you'll find shorter Bucket Emptying episodes, with longer episodes each Thursday. The greatest gift we can give our children is self-belief. It will get them further in life than any qualification and is absolutely possible for each and every child; we just need the right information and support around us to teach them. The old saying ‘it takes a village to raise a child” couldn’t be more true than now. Parenting has got a whole lot harder; not just because we are busier than ever but because our children are growing up in an ever changing, fast-paced world, which is so different to the one we grew up in. Our children have more pressure to be better, look better, do better, and in a world where lives are so publicly scrutinised and commented on through social media it’s really no wonder we’re seeing mental health problems sky rocketing amongst children, teens, and young adults. What you can expect from this podcast are honest conversations about parenting. We’ll talk confidence resilience, anxiety, managing tech, and all the topics you’d expect as well blowing the lid off the widely help misconception that children are innately resilient. They’re not! This podcast is for people who want to get real about parenting. You understand it can get messy sometimes and aren’t afraid to admit it. I have had more than my fair share of messy and I will no doubt share these with you along the way. I won’t dress things up but I will always give you something practical to take away and use in each and every episode. My guests and experts will be real people who have overcome their own adversities and bring with them a message to us as parents, as well as inspiring stories. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation... We'd love to hear from you! We want to hear what you love and what you don't love about the podcast, so we can keep making it better: https://podcastsurvey.typeform.com/to/SEyYrxGB Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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