Dating, Relationships, and Disability

Kathy O'Connell
Dating, Relationships, and Disability

We offer strategies, encouragement, and mindset tips on dating with a disability. We talk about how to navigate sexual ableism, focus on your power to attract, and develop happy and healthy relationships.

  1. 170 - What Would Your Future Self Tell You?

    3 DAYS AGO

    170 - What Would Your Future Self Tell You?

    You're being welcomed into an intimate and empowering conversation that speaks directly to your experience navigating relationships and disability during the holiday season. Moving beyond common narratives of challenge, you're guided through a refreshing exploration of hope, connection, and authentic love. As you listen, you're invited to discover how love manifests in your life beyond traditional romantic partnerships. You're encouraged to recognize those special connections – the friend who truly gets you, the family member making spaces accessible, or the community celebrating your complete self, disability included. The conversation flows naturally into exploring the power of radical self-love and reflection. You're reminded that your journey isn't just about finding partnership – it's about discovering your worth, understanding your needs, and recognizing your incredible capacity for love. Each challenge you've faced has strengthened you, deepened your compassion, and helped you become more authentically yourself. Through thoughtful discussion, you explore creating holiday celebrations that align with YOUR needs. You're encouraged to reimagine traditions with accessibility in mind and craft new ones that match your energy levels and joy. Whether you're spending the holidays alone, with family, friends, or a partner, you're assured that your experience is valid and beautiful. The dialogue emphasizes that your disability doesn't limit your capacity for love – instead, it might enhance your empathy, spark creative communication, and deepen your appreciation for genuine connection. You're reminded that love speaks many languages, including understanding, patience, and true acceptance. Your journey concludes with a powerful New Year's message about trusting yourself and your path forward. You're invited to join the "Dating Made Easier" community for support and practical skills to transform your dating experience in the coming year. Check Out Our Dating Memberships Join our Dating Made Easier community to learn more about navigating the complex world of online dating with confidence and self-respect. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    21 min
  2. 169 - Holiday Reflections on Disability, Love, and Authentic Connection

    12/24/2024

    169 - Holiday Reflections on Disability, Love, and Authentic Connection

    Happy Holidays! We  dive deep into reimagining the holiday season through the lens of disability and authentic connection. We explore not just the challenges, but the rich opportunities for meaningful relationships that arise during this festive time. You'll hear about how love shows up in unexpected ways – it's not always about that romantic partner, but maybe it's that friend who truly gets you, or the family member who makes sure every gathering space works for you. Our episode unpacks how these connections often matter more than any wrapped gift under the tree. During this episode, we talk about your journey of self-discovery and growth. You know those moments when you've stood firm in your boundaries? When you've advocated for yourself in relationships? That's all part of understanding your worth and your amazing capacity for love. Every challenge you've faced has shaped you into someone more resilient and empathetic. We get practical about making the holidays work for YOU. Whether you're thinking about tweaking traditional celebrations to be more accessible or creating entirely new traditions that match your energy and comfort levels – it's all valid. You'll learn why your holiday experience doesn't need to mirror anyone else's Instagram-perfect moments, whether you're flying solo, hanging with family, or celebrating with a partner. The episode challenges common misconceptions about disability and relationships. You'll discover how your experiences might actually enhance your ability to connect deeply with others, making you more creative in communication and more appreciative of genuine connections. We explore how love adapts and speaks in many languages, including understanding, patience, and acceptance. Remember, you deserve joy, love, and connection – exactly as you are. Your disability isn't holding you back from love; it's part of your unique story. We wrap up by embracing the hope that exists in every connection and every moment.   Check Out Our Dating Memberships Join our Dating Made Easier community to learn more about navigating the complex world of online dating with confidence and self-respect. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    11 min
  3. 168 - Managing Holiday Loneliness

    12/17/2024

    168 - Managing Holiday Loneliness

    The holiday season, often centered around family and togetherness, can amplify feelings of isolation, particularly for those navigating dating while feeling marginalized. Loneliness during this time is common, but it’s also manageable. We’ll discuss strategies to turn this season into an opportunity for self-discovery and social connection. From reaching out to friends for casual meet-ups to joining inclusive community events, there are ways to create joy and meaningful interaction during the holidays. Navigating Family Gatherings and Expectations Family gatherings can be both a joy and a challenge, especially when relatives ask questions about your love life. In this episode, we explore how to set boundaries and respond confidently to questions about your relationship status or dating journey. Learn how to shift the conversation toward positive topics, assert your independence, and celebrate your unique story with your family. Meeting a Partner’s Family or Introducing Someone New Bringing a new partner into the fold during the holidays can feel daunting, especially if you have a disability or identify as part of a marginalized group. This episode offers practical tips on making these introductions smoother, such as preparing your partner and family ahead of time and staying true to your authentic self. We’ll also discuss how to handle potential moments of awkwardness with grace and humor. Inclusive Holiday Dating Ideas Holidays bring a unique charm to dating, with festive lights, winter markets, and cozy indoor activities. We’ll share accessible and inclusive holiday date ideas that focus on building connection rather than stress. Whether it’s enjoying a virtual cocoa tasting or strolling through an adaptive holiday display, the emphasis is on fun, creativity, and inclusion. Building Confidence for New Beginnings The holiday season can be a natural time for reflection and goal-setting. We’ll discuss how to use this time to assess your dating journey, identify what’s important to you, and set empowering intentions for the new year. Building confidence is key—embracing the season as an opportunity for growth and renewal can set the tone for positive dating experiences ahead. Holiday Self-Care and Maintaining Emotional Health   The holidays are often a balancing act between excitement and self-care, especially when dating stress or societal pressures arise. We’ll discuss the importance of prioritizing your emotional well-being. From knowing when to say “no” to overwhelming social commitments to carving out quiet moments for yourself, self-care is essential for enjoying the season to its fullest. Finding Joy Through Connection   Whether you’re currently dating or working on preparing yourself for future relationships, the holidays offer unique opportunities to find connection. This might mean expanding your social network, rekindling old friendships, or focusing on developing deeper self-awareness. By being open to different forms of connection, you can create meaningful experiences and celebrate this season with confidence. Actionable Steps to End the Year with Purpose As the episode concludes, we’ll offer actionable steps to help listeners end the year with clarity and purpose in their dating lives. This includes creating a vision for what you want in a relationship, identifying small but impactful steps toward those goals, and embracing a mindset of joy and possibility during this reflective season. Check Out Our Dating Memberships   Join our Dating Made Easier community to learn more about navigating the complex world of online dating with confidence and self-respect. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    17 min
  4. 167 - Boundaries on Dating Apps

    12/10/2024

    167 - Boundaries on Dating Apps

    Dating App Boundaries: Protecting Your Well-Being In this episode, we dive into the critical topic of setting boundaries on dating apps. Dating online can be exciting, but it also comes with unique challenges that make establishing clear personal limits essential. Why Boundaries Matter Boundaries are more than just protection—they're a powerful statement of self-worth. By clearly communicating your expectations, you:- Signal that you deserve respect- Filter out incompatible matches- Create space for genuine connections Explain Your Perspective Communicate why boundaries are important. Use positive language like, "I believe good relationships are built on mutual respect. Speak Up Immediately When someone crosses a line, address it directly. Phrases like "I'm not comfortable with that" help establish your limits clearly. Set Communication Expectations Define how you want to be treated. For example: "I value kindness and honesty in our conversations." Special Considerations for Diverse Daters For those with disabilities or unique circumstances, boundaries become even more crucial. Be prepared to shut down inappropriate questions, especially those that feel invasive or objectifying. Taking Action Remember, you're not obligated to continue conversations that make you uncomfortable. Unmatching or blocking is a valid response to repeated boundary violations. Setting boundaries is an ongoing process. Start with essentials, be patient with yourself, and understand that healthy boundaries actually bring you closer to finding meaningful connections. Join our Dating Made Easier community to learn more about navigating the complex world of online dating with confidence and self-respect. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    24 min
  5. 166 - Whoa, Boundaries Please

    12/02/2024

    166 - Whoa, Boundaries Please

    Check out the Annual Sale for Dating Made Easier here. Check out our sale on professional training and our Empowering Healthy Relationships curriculum. Boundaries are not about pushing people away, but creating deeper, more meaningful connections through mutual respect and understanding. They act like invisible property lines around your emotional and physical space, helping to eliminate misunderstandings and protect your well-being. Key Insights * Boundaries communicate your personal limits clearly* Saying "no" is an act of self-care, not selfishness* Healthy boundaries attract respectful relationships Why Boundaries Matter Continuously saying "yes" when you want to say "no" leads to exhaustion and resentment. By understanding and communicating your limits, you create a blueprint for how you want to be treated. This self-awareness helps you recognize situations where you feel uncomfortable or taken advantage of. The Self-Awareness Process 1. Identify uncomfortable feelings in relationships2. Recognize your personal limits3. Communicate boundaries clearly4. Consistently enforce those boundaries Benefits of Strong Boundaries * More authentic interactions* Increased personal energy* Deeper, more genuine connections* Attraction of like-minded, respectful individuals Potential Challenges Some people might initially resist your new boundaries. However, those who genuinely care will adjust and appreciate your honesty. Your self-respect becomes a beacon that naturally filters relationships. Long-Term Impact Setting boundaries is an ongoing practice of self-respect and clear communication. It transforms how you interact in all life domains—work, personal relationships, and social situations. You'll find yourself making choices aligned with your values rather than defaulting to people-pleasing behaviors. Remember: Boundaries create more freedom within relationships. By establishing clear limits, you can be more spontaneous and generous, leading to more successful and sustainable connections. Check out our Dating Memberships: If you ready for a very supportive community for your dating journey, come and check out our Dating Made Easier community. You get three virtual meetings a month inside the community where you learn new skills and insights for meeting people. You also get to brainstorm and network with others who are figuring out their dating journey. Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    18 min
  6. 165 - Decision + Action = Changes You Long For

    11/26/2024

    165 - Decision + Action = Changes You Long For

    Check out the Annual Sale for Dating Made Easier here. Check out our sale on professional training and our Empowering Healthy Relationships curriculum. The Power of Decision-Making: Breaking Free from Paralysis We've all experienced that moment of being stuck, overwhelmed by choices and afraid to move forward. But here's a powerful truth: making a decision, any decision, can be transformative. Decision paralysis is a universal challenge. When faced with multiple options, our brain often freezes, like having too many browser tabs open. Whether it's improving relationships, advancing a career, or making personal changes, the fear of making the wrong choice can completely halt our progress. Action Power The magic happens when you take action. Making a decision does three crucial things:1. It narrows your focus, freeing mental energy2. It provides real-world experience and feedback3. It creates momentum, building confidence with each step Break free from indecision: • Embrace the "two-way door" concept - most decisions aren't permanent• Start with small, manageable choices• Focus on progress, not perfection Remember: The goal isn't to make a perfect choice, but to move forward. Every step, no matter how small, is progress. When you make a decision, you turn on a headlight in the darkness - you might not see the entire journey, but you can see the next few steps clearly. Don't let fear keep you stuck. Choose forward motion. Choose growth. Choose to act.  Check out our Dating Memberships: If you ready for a very supportive community for your dating journey, come and check out our Dating Made Easier community. You get three virtual meetings a month inside the community where you learn new skills and insights for meeting people. You also get to brainstorm and network with others who are figuring out their dating journey. Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    28 min
  7. 163 - Ask Three Friends

    11/19/2024

    163 - Ask Three Friends

    Looking for a fresh approach to dating? Consider asking three people you know if they're aware of anyone single who might be interested in dating. This strategy leverages your existing social network and reveals potential connections you might not have discovered otherwise. When you initiate these conversations, you're subtly expanding your dating possibilities. Your connections might not immediately know someone, but the idea can percolate in their minds. Over time, they might recall a friend who could be a great match for you. This method offers a meaningful alternative to online dating, which can feel impersonal and overwhelming. Unlike dating apps where you're competing for attention, asking trusted connections creates a more personal pathway. These people understand your personality, values, and what you're seeking, potentially leading to more genuine connections. Personal Growth The approach also encourages personal growth by requiring vulnerability. Asking for help in your dating life might feel uncomfortable initially, but it demonstrates your commitment to finding a meaningful relationship. It allows friends to support you in unexpected ways and shows you're proactively seeking connection. A word of caution: be prepared for potential disappointment. Not everyone will perceive you as a viable romantic prospect, which can be emotionally challenging. However, don't let this deter you from the strategy. The beauty of this approach is its ongoing nature. By consistently keeping your dating goals in friends' awareness, you increase the likelihood they'll think of you when meeting potential matches. It's an organic way of expanding your dating pool without the stress of online interactions. This method transforms dating from a solitary pursuit into a collaborative effort. You're not just hoping to meet someone; you're actively engaging your social network in your journey. Each conversation plants a seed of possibility, creating multiple pathways to potential relationships. So take a proactive step. Reach out to a few friends or acquaintances and express your openness to meeting someone. You might be surprised by the connections that emerge. Even if results aren't immediate, you've initiated a process of connection and possibility. Check out our Dating Memberships: If you ready for a very supportive community for your dating journey, come and check out our Dating Made Easier community. You get three virtual meetings a month inside the community where you learn new skills and insights for meeting people. You also get to brainstorm and network with others who are figuring out their dating journey. Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    23 min
  8. 162 - Don't Go It Alone

    11/12/2024

    162 - Don't Go It Alone

    Click here or here for the very special early offer mentioned in the podcast. In today’s dating world, where dating apps and casual relationships dominate, finding meaningful connections can feel more challenging than ever. The fast-paced, swipe-driven culture often reduces potential partners to quick judgments, making it hard to build trust or develop deeper bonds. Casual relationships, while common, can leave you feeling unfulfilled if you're looking for something more substantial. Community Approach This is why a community approach to dating is so important—it offers a space where you can connect with others who share your values and goals, exchange experiences, and receive emotional support. In a community, you’re not navigating the complexities of modern dating alone; instead, you’re learning, growing, and persevering together with people who understand the importance of meaningful connections. Being part of a supportive community, such as Dating Made Easier, during your dating journey can make all the difference when it comes to resilience and maintaining a positive mindset. Dating, as you know, isn't just about finding a partner; it's also about navigating the emotional ups and downs that come with putting yourself out there. In a community, you're surrounded by others who understand what you're going through, who can offer empathy, encouragement, and practical advice. This shared experience helps normalize the setbacks, making them feel less overwhelming because you're not facing them alone. Instead, you’re part of a network where everyone is working toward similar goals, which can fuel your perseverance. Have Your Back When you start your dating journey, you may feel both excited and nervous, wondering how to approach it, what obstacles you might face, and how to maintain hope when things get tough. Being part of a community gives you a foundation of support right from the beginning. Others can help you brainstorm strategies for meeting new people, share their own experiences, and offer reassurance that the challenges you encounter are normal. Having people to turn to when you feel unsure can help boost your confidence and keep you moving forward, especially during times when you might otherwise feel stuck. Highs and Lows The dating journey inevitably involves highs and lows. There are moments of excitement when you meet someone new or have a great date, followed by periods of disappointment when things don’t work out as you’d hoped. These emotional fluctuations can be exhausting and disheartening. But in a supportive community, you’re reminded that these ups and downs are a natural part of the process. Hearing stories from others who’ve experienced similar disappointments and eventually found success can inspire you to stay positive and keep going, knowing that setbacks are just part of the journey. Resilient Mindset A supportive community also plays a key role in helping you maintain a resilient mindset. When you’re dating, it’s easy to internalize rejection or take it personally, which can chip away at your self-esteem. In a community, others can remind you that rejection isn’t a reflection of your worth but simply a part of dating. They can help you reframe these experiences, showing you how to learn from them and keep your confidence intact. With this kind of emotional reinforcement, you’re better able to bounce back from disappointments and keep believing in your potential to find a meaningful connection. Vulnerability Developing meaningful connections in dating requires vulnerability, which can sometimes feel risky or intimidating. You might hesitate to open up out of fear of being hurt. In a community, you can practice being vulnerable in a safer environment, where you know others will support and validate your feelings. This practice can strengthen your ability to be open and authentic in your dating life, increasing your chances of forming deeper, more fulfilling relationships. Knowing that your community has your back gives you the courage to take emotional risks that lead to genuine connections. Accountability Another benefit of being part of a community during your dating journey is the accountability it provides. It can be easy to become discouraged or lose motivation after a few setbacks, but when you’re part of a group that encourages you to keep taking action, you’re more likely to stay consistent. Whether it’s attending events, reaching out to potential matches, or simply working on your dating mindset, a community can help hold you accountable to your goals. This accountability keeps you moving forward, even when you’re tempted to give up. Communities also offer a wealth of shared knowledge and resources. By connecting with others, you can learn new dating strategies, gain insight into how others have navigated challenges similar to yours, and discover new opportunities to meet people. You don’t have to figure everything out on your own; instead, you can draw on the collective wisdom of your group to help you make informed choices and feel more confident about your path forward. This shared learning accelerates your progress and makes the journey feel less daunting. Decreased Isolation Finally, being part of a supportive community fosters a sense of belonging that can be invaluable during your dating journey. The sense of isolation that sometimes accompanies dating struggles is eased when you know that others are right there with you, offering compassion and understanding. This belonging can uplift your spirits, reduce feelings of loneliness, and remind you that you are part of something bigger than yourself. It helps you remember that your worth isn’t defined by whether or not you’ve found a partner yet, but by the meaningful connections and growth you experience along the way.  Check out our Dating Memberships: If you ready for a very supportive community for your dating journey, come and check out our Dating Made Easier community. You get three virtual meetings a month inside the community where you learn new skills and insights for meeting people. You also get to brainstorm and network with others who are figuring out their dating journey. Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation Artwork photo by Elevate

    23 min

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

We offer strategies, encouragement, and mindset tips on dating with a disability. We talk about how to navigate sexual ableism, focus on your power to attract, and develop happy and healthy relationships.

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