Parenting Teenagers Untangled

Rachel Richards

This podcast helps you become a Fearless Parent: One who fears less and wonders more. If you've found yourself wondering why is my teenager suddenly so angry? How much screen time is too much? Should I take their phone away at night? Why have they lost all motivation? What do I do about vaping, friendship problems, anxiety, parties, dating, exams… or a teenager who simply won’t talk to me? There’s a very good chance we’ve already talked about it on this podcast. Teenagers Untangled has a huge and growing library of episodes covering the questions, worries and challenges that come with raising tweens and teenagers. Rather than scrolling through hundreds of episodes trying to find the right one, use the search bar to search for what’s happening in your family right now. How to search: Simply type a keyword or short phrase into the search box. Try things like: anger • anxiety • phones • motivation • sleep • ADHD • vaping • alcohol • friendship • school • exams • lying • boundaries • consequences • social media • first love • university • leaving home You can also try different words if your first search doesn’t bring up exactly what you need. For example, if you’re worried about your teenager being rude, you might also search respect, anger, conflict or communication. The search will bring up relevant Teenagers Untangled episodes so you can go straight to the conversations that are most useful to you. Think of it as a parenting database, So don't feel you need to start with our newest episode — start with your question. And if I haven't covered your question yet, tell me. Some of my best episodes begin with a question from a parent just like you. Whatever stage you're at, you don't have to figure it all out from scratch. Chances are, we've already started untangling it. FEARLESS PARENTING: Most parenting advice tells you what to do. I help you see things differently. Fear tells us our teenager is lazy, rude, addicted or deliberately difficult. Wonder asks, What's really going on? What need, skill or fear might I be missing? When we replace fear with curiosity, we make better decisions, drop our judgement and start connecting, and raise young people who are more resilient, independent and emotionally healthy. Join thousands of parents each week as we learn to Fear Less. Wonder More. If this resonates with you, join me on SUBSTACK: For those of you who want to read my thoughts beyond the podcast, or who just want to help me feel like the pebbles I have dropped in the ocean of life are making a difference, why not join my paid community? You’ll get one-to-one support and printable PDF’s that give you the top tips from each podcast episode so you have your own little, bespoke manual. COMMUNITY: I’ll be offering regular extras, including tips and thoughts, that help you tune into what matters. NOTES: So many listeners say they have rewound the episodes to write down notes, well now there’s no need. Paid subscribers will have a weekly, downloadable, summary of the top tips from each episode, so you don’t have to take notes. Please let me know if there are any old episodes for which you’d like the notes. I’m very happy to supply them.

  1. 2d ago ·  Video

    Starting Secondary School: What Every Parent Needs to Know

    Ask Rachel anything They're the oldest in their primary and suddenly our babies have to cope with being the youngest in their senior school. It's a big leap, and it comes just at the point when our kids are becoming much more aware of themselves and others with a big dollop of puberty-driven insecurity. It's easy to worry about them making friends, coping with their newfound indepenence; complicated timetables, different classrooms, homework, buses and remembering their passwords.  Here to help us figure it all out is Katherine Radice, author of the Parents Guide to Exam Stress long time teacher and mum of two teenage boys.  Just five of things we cover in the episode are: Realistic expectations for starting secondary school Why trying to make the “perfect” first day backfiresTeaching kids that “lumps and bumps” are normal and part of adjustmentIdentity, uniform, and appearance How brands/clothes (e.g., specific shoes, jackets) are tied to teen identity and belongingWhen and why it’s worth listening and sometimes compromising on these wantsExtracurricular activities and balance Benefits of clubs for confidence, community, and friendship-buildingThe risks of over-scheduling and how to judge when it’s “too much”Emotional turbulence in the early weeks Tears, anger, door-slamming, and exhaustion as expected reactionsHow to respond with empathy, rituals of comfort, and not jumping into “fix-it” mode too fast.Communication: with teens and with school How to get teens talking: low-stakes questions, rituals, “super silence,” and active listeningWhen to see something as a “blip” vs a real problem, and how to approach schools constructivelyFriendships:  How to talk about making friends without turning it into too much of a big dealHopefully, by the end of our discussion you'll have a much clearer idea of what you can do and also what you don't need to be doing to support your children through the turbulent teen school years.  Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    Starting Secondary School: What Every Parent Needs to Know
  2. 5d ago ·  Bonus Video

    Exams, AI Friends and More Joy: Parenting Unpacked in the Wonder Room

    Ask Rachel anything Welcome to the Wonder Room where Richards, and Katharine Radice, wonder aboutt three huge areas in our teens’ lives right now: Exam results and school pressure – how to respond to GCSE grades in a way that protects motivation and self-worth, rather than letting national headlines define your child.Schools and teachers – why constant school-bashing can damage our teenagers’ relationship with education, and how to talk about school in a way that keeps teachers as allies, not enemies.AI, chatbots, and friendships – including the new teen version of ChatGPT, the risks of treating chatbots like “friends,” and how that might affect real-world relationships, disagreement, and even narcissistic tendencies.We unpack the stages of friendship explained by Sheridan Voysey in the latest episode—from acquaintances to deep, 2 a.m. friends—how to help teens cope when secrets are shared or friendships wobble, and why forgiveness as shared understanding can be so powerful. Finally, we turn the lens back on us parents: how the way we talk about other people at home shapes our teens’ sense of safety and trust, why our own friendships and community really matter, and how giving ourselves permission to have a life—whether that’s a simple “Fancy a Pint” WhatsApp group or low-stakes cups of tea with neighbours—actually makes things. Contact: Katherine Radice Rachel's Substack Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    Exams, AI Friends and More Joy: Parenting Unpacked in the Wonder Room
  3. Aug 19 ·  Video

    My Teen Has No Friends: Loneliness, Friendship and How Parents Can Explain & Model the Skill

    Ask Rachel anything So many parents come to me saying 'My teen has no friends. What should I do?' and I can't help wondering if we are missing one of the most important ways to help them. Being good at friendships ourselves. Think about it. If we're not good at making and maintaining friends ourselves, who will our babies learn their friendship skills from? In this episode of Teenagers Untangled, I’m joined by author, broadcaster, and founder of The Friendship Lab, Sheridan Voysey, to unpack why 20–25% of adults now say they have no close friends, how that impacts our teens’ mental health, and what we can actually do about it.  We explore the five stages of friendship, why busyness, smartphones, and constant mobility are eroding our connections, and the simple, intentional steps parents can take to help their tweens and teens build deep, lasting relationships. Whether your child is struggling to find “their people,” stuck on the surface with classmates, or hiding behind screens, this conversation will give you practical language, science-backed insight, and real-life ideas for modelling healthy friendships at home. If you care about your teen’s confidence, wellbeing, resilience, and sense of belonging, this is an episode you won’t want to miss. Contact the Friendship Lab The Friendship Lab Course I create notes on every episode which you'll find on my Substack page  Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    My Teen Has No Friends: Loneliness, Friendship and How Parents Can Explain & Model the Skill
  4. Aug 12

    Empty Nest: How to Cope When Your Teen Goes off to College or University. Vintage

    Ask Rachel anything In this episode of Teenagers Untangled, we’re talking about what happens when the children we’ve poured our hearts, time, and energy into finally leave home. If you’re facing the prospect of a child heading off to university or moving out—and feeling anything from pride and excitement to grief, anxiety, or a loss of identity—this episode is for you. First, I revisit a powerful conversation with mindfulness coach Susie Asli, where we unpack empty nest syndrome: why feelings of grief, loneliness, or even physical symptoms like sleeplessness and nausea are a normal response,how your identity as a parent can feel shaken when your child leaves,and practical ways to prepare yourself emotionally, rebuild routines, and reconnect—with yourself, with your partner, and with your wider life.Then I speak with Hannah Bankier, a coach specialising in personal and professional transitions and founder of Birdie Launcher. Hannah invites us to rethink the very idea of an “empty nest” and instead see this stage as a launchpad—for our children and for ourselves. She shares: how to start preparing years before your child leaves,how to evolve your parenting from “controller” to “mentor,”how to co-create a new kind of relationship with your emerging adult,and how to rediscover your own purpose, joy, and identity beyond being “Mum.”You're not broken if you're feeling grief. You're ready to start a new chapter. Hannah Bankier All the tips from this episode Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    Empty Nest: How to Cope When Your Teen Goes off to College or University. Vintage
  5. Aug 11 ·  Bonus

    Exam Results: What if my teen doesn't get the grades they want? Vintage

    Ask Rachel anything A listener parenting a teen son wrote to say both of them felt pretty stunned when he was rejected from the university he'd set his heart on. She asked for the best way to help our teenagers cope with this sort of disappointment.  I thought it was a great question and a good opportunity to also look at how we parents can best navigate when our teen has worked for years toward a dream - a top university place, exam results, a team, a part - and it doesn’t happen. The disappointment can feel earth‑shattering for them and gut‑wrenching for you. In this episode I talk with Dr Dominique Thompson, award‑winning GP and young people’s mental health expert, about how to support teenagers through big disappointments such as university rejection, exam failure, and missed opportunities – without rescuing them or minimising their feelings. We explore: What teens are actually grieving when things go wrong – including the loss of an imagined futureHow to validate their emotions while gently stopping catastrophic thinkingThe difference between building resilience and teaching kids to suppress their feelingsWhy today’s culture of perfectionism and “being the best” is driving anxiety, burnout and fear of failureHow to help teens separate self‑worth from grades, offers and achievementsPractical ways to prepare teens for university life, academic stress and independenceWhen dropping out isn’t the only option – how to press pause, get help and return strongerWhat to do if your teen feels “left behind” while friends move on to university or big opportunitiesHow parents can be a “safe harbour”: supportive, boundaried, and not adding their own disappointment to their teen’s loadIf you’re a parent wondering how to respond when your child says, “I’ve failed you,” or “There’s no point trying,” this conversation will give you concrete language, mindset shifts and step‑by‑step strategies to help them cope, reframe, and find a new path forward. Dr Dominique Thompson: is a multi-award winning former GP, young people's mental health expert, TEDx speaker, author and educator, with over two decades of NHS clinical experience. She is author of The Student Wellbeing Series for young people, and co-author of How to Grow a Grown Up (PenguinRandomHouse) for parents. dominique.thompson@me.com www.buzzconsulting.co.uk  https://www.instagram.com/drdomthompson/ https://www.facebook.com/drdomthompson/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/dominique-thompson/ Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    Exam Results: What if my teen doesn't get the grades they want? Vintage
  6. Aug 5

    How to Prepare Your Child for College & University: The Teen view on Friends, Safety, Study, Money and Freshers Week.

    Ask Rachel anything Sending your teen off to university can feel both exciting and terrifying. In this episode of Parenting Teenagers Untangled, I talk with my 19-year-old daughter Phoebe, home after her first year at Oxford University, about what parents really need to know to prepare their teens for university life.  We cover the big worries parents Google most: how teens make friends in Freshers’ Week, coping with the academic workload, dealing with drinking, drugs and peer pressure, managing money and budgeting, handling homesickness and mental health, and how to balance independence with safety. If you’re wondering how to support your child’s transition to university without being overbearing—and how to trust them while still keeping them safe—this honest, practical conversation will give you clear guidance, real examples, and reassuring perspective from both a parent and a student. Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    How to Prepare Your Child for College & University: The Teen view on Friends, Safety, Study, Money and Freshers Week.
  7. Jul 29 ·  Video

    How to Be a Calm Parent to Teens using Boundaries with Diane Sorensen

    Ask Rachel anything Are you tired of yelling at your teen – and hating yourself afterwards? In this episode of Teenagers Untangled, I talked with parenting and relationship coach Diane Sorensen about how to stay calm with teens, stop power struggles, and set healthy boundaries without becoming a pushover. If you’re dealing with eye-rolling, “disrespectful” attitudes, shouting matches, and constant tension at home, this conversation will help you: Understand why you get so triggered by your teen’s behaviorShift from controlling behavior to nurturing real connectionUse simple emotional regulation tools to pause before you explodeTell the difference between calm parenting and permissive parentingCreate healthy boundaries that reduce resentment and build trustRepair after you’ve shouted and show your teen that change is possibleWe talk about creating boundaries, unpack practical strategies like the PARR method (Pause, Acknowledge, Respond, Reflect), how to reframe “disrespect” as information, and why owning your triggers is the fastest way to transform your relationship with your teen. If you’ve ever thought, “I promised I wouldn’t parent like this, but I don’t know how to stop,” this episode is for you. Diane Sorensen Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    How to Be a Calm Parent to Teens using Boundaries with Diane Sorensen
  8. Jul 22 ·  Video

    Blended Families: How to Connect With a Child Who Doesn't Accept You

    Ask Rachel anything If you’ve ever fallen in love with someone who already has children, or tried to blend two families and thought, “Why is this so hard? What’s wrong with me?” – this episode is for you. You are not broken, and you are definitely not alone. I was joined by Masha Rusanov, coach, writer, and author of Repatterned. Together we unpack: Why step‑parenting can feel so emotionally different from parenting your biological childrenHow to prioritise connection before correction with bonus kidsThe idea of “natural parenting” – why step‑parents shouldn’t be the main disciplinariansWhat healthy co‑parenting and emotional regulation look like when there are exes, new partners, and multiple households in the mixPractical, everyday strategies to reduce conflict and build trust over timeClick here for all of the tips from the episode Whether you’re a step‑parent, a biological parent in a blended family, or you co‑parent across different homes, this conversation will help you feel seen, supported, and better equipped for the long game. Masha Rusanov Support the show Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit.  You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.  Please don't hesitate to seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping. There's no shame in reaching out for support. When you look after yourself your entire family benefits. Find all the tips from the episdoe on Substack:  My email teenagersuntangled@gmail.com My website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me Instagram Facebook

    Blended Families: How to Connect With a Child Who Doesn't Accept You
5
out of 5
24 Ratings

About

This podcast helps you become a Fearless Parent: One who fears less and wonders more. If you've found yourself wondering why is my teenager suddenly so angry? How much screen time is too much? Should I take their phone away at night? Why have they lost all motivation? What do I do about vaping, friendship problems, anxiety, parties, dating, exams… or a teenager who simply won’t talk to me? There’s a very good chance we’ve already talked about it on this podcast. Teenagers Untangled has a huge and growing library of episodes covering the questions, worries and challenges that come with raising tweens and teenagers. Rather than scrolling through hundreds of episodes trying to find the right one, use the search bar to search for what’s happening in your family right now. How to search: Simply type a keyword or short phrase into the search box. Try things like: anger • anxiety • phones • motivation • sleep • ADHD • vaping • alcohol • friendship • school • exams • lying • boundaries • consequences • social media • first love • university • leaving home You can also try different words if your first search doesn’t bring up exactly what you need. For example, if you’re worried about your teenager being rude, you might also search respect, anger, conflict or communication. The search will bring up relevant Teenagers Untangled episodes so you can go straight to the conversations that are most useful to you. Think of it as a parenting database, So don't feel you need to start with our newest episode — start with your question. And if I haven't covered your question yet, tell me. Some of my best episodes begin with a question from a parent just like you. Whatever stage you're at, you don't have to figure it all out from scratch. Chances are, we've already started untangling it. FEARLESS PARENTING: Most parenting advice tells you what to do. I help you see things differently. Fear tells us our teenager is lazy, rude, addicted or deliberately difficult. Wonder asks, What's really going on? What need, skill or fear might I be missing? When we replace fear with curiosity, we make better decisions, drop our judgement and start connecting, and raise young people who are more resilient, independent and emotionally healthy. Join thousands of parents each week as we learn to Fear Less. Wonder More. If this resonates with you, join me on SUBSTACK: For those of you who want to read my thoughts beyond the podcast, or who just want to help me feel like the pebbles I have dropped in the ocean of life are making a difference, why not join my paid community? You’ll get one-to-one support and printable PDF’s that give you the top tips from each podcast episode so you have your own little, bespoke manual. COMMUNITY: I’ll be offering regular extras, including tips and thoughts, that help you tune into what matters. NOTES: So many listeners say they have rewound the episodes to write down notes, well now there’s no need. Paid subscribers will have a weekly, downloadable, summary of the top tips from each episode, so you don’t have to take notes. Please let me know if there are any old episodes for which you’d like the notes. I’m very happy to supply them.