Our TFMR Stories | Our decisions, our grief, real true parent stories

Sabrina Fletcher | Pregnancy Loss Doula supporting grieving parents
  • 5.0 (9)
  • Parenting
  • Updated Bimonthly

Pregnancy loss grief support for parents who terminated a wanted pregnancy for medical reasons. Real TFMR stories, decision support, and understanding in the isolation.Host Sabrina Fletcher is a TFMR loss mom & pregnancy loss doula who understands your choice and experience. Episodes include real TFMR parent stories + support from grief therapists & baby loss professionals.Facing a TFMR decision or grieving after, you'll find community here:Support & connection: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/facebookgroup.htmlDecision Support call: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/decision-support.html

  1. Sep 25

    What to expect with spiritual healing after termination │ Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Part 3 of 3)

    I was angry at God, the Universe, Mother Nature, Everything! after my TFMR. My spiritual life was turned upside down after going through ending a wanted pregnancy. The diagnosis, the decision, the termination - it ripped my heart and soul into a thousand pieces. In this episode I talk about my spiritual recovery after TFMR, what that looked like, what you may experience as well, what to expect after a termination for medical reasons. Listen in if you are wondering how to heal spiritually, if your soul feels wounded after losing a baby in such a heartbreaking and misunderstood way. It can shine some light on what you are going through and give you some hope that you too can recover after terminating a wanted pregnancy. In this 3-part series, I'm sharing how we *really* heal - physically, emotionally, and spiritually after TFMR. Part 1 (previous episode) - Physical Recovery Part 2 (previous episode) - Emotional Recovery Part 3 (THIS EPISODE) - Spiritual Recovery TODAY: What to expect with spirituall healing after termination │Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Day 3 of 3) And for more care and support through your own recovery, you are invited to our small group, next rounds of Ascend TFMR Grief Circle now open. We have a spot for you: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/ascend-apply - the next groups are starting October 11th (Noon Eastern time) and October 14th (7pm Eastern time) If you want to join in the live streams of these episodes we are in the Facebook group “Our TFMR Stories” - to become a free member join us here: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/facebookgroup   🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com   Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  2. Sep 23

    What to expect with emotional healing after termination │Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Part 2 of 3)

    Baby loss, let alone TFMR!, is rarely talked about so of course you may feel in the dark about what your emotional healing and recovery may look like afterwards. Many of the distressing and hard emotions of termination pregnancy loss - guilt, what-ifs, despair, exhaustion, jealousy - may feel shocking and like they are coming at you all at once and all together. In this episode I gently detangle where and why you may be feeling what you are after ending a wanted pregnancy and how to move towards emotional recovery. I also talk about why acknowledging and caring for the toughest emotions is a KEY first step in your healing after TFMR. In this 3-part series, I'm sharing how we *really* heal - physically, emotionally, and spiritually after TFMR. Part 1 (previous episode) - Physical Recovery Part 2 (TODAY'S EPISODE) - Emotional Recovery Part 3 (Thurs. Sept. 24th) - Spiritual Recovery TODAY: What to expect with emotional healing after termination │Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Day 2 of 3) And for more care and support through your own recovery, you are invited to our small group, next rounds of Ascend TFMR Grief Circle now open. We have a spot for you: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/ascend-apply - the next groups are starting October 11th (Noon Eastern time) and October 14th (7pm Eastern time) If you want to join in the live streams of these episodes we are in the Facebook group “Our TFMR Stories” - to become a free member join us here: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/facebookgroup   🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com   Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  3. Sep 22

    What to expect with physical healing after termination │ Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Part 1 of 3)

    We’re sharing what we wished someone would have told us about what to expect healing-wise after your TFMR. I’m listing out all the physical affects of ending a wanted pregnancy and reading stories from the group about their physical recover after termination baby loss. 'Cause I know for me the "call if the bleeding is heavier than a period" and nothing more was NOT enough info. We deserve SOOOO much better. So in this 3-part series, I'm sharing how we *really* heal - physically, emotionally and spiritually after TFMR. Part 1 (this episode) - Physical Recovery Part 2 (Wed. Sept. 23rd) - Emotional Recovery Part 3 (Thurs. Sept. 24th) - Spiritual Recovery TODAY: What to expect with physical healing after termination │Layers of Recovery after TFMR (Day 1 of 3) And for more care and support through your own recovery, you are invited to our small group, next rounds of Ascend TFMR Grief Circle now open. We have a spot for you: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/ascend-apply - some of the information was cut off in this recording since I was streaming live, but the next groups are starting October 11th (Noon Eastern time) and October 14th (7pm Eastern time) If you want to join in the live streams of these episodes we are in the Facebook group “Our TFMR Stories” - to become a free member join us here: Join Facebook TFMR support group Other links mentioned: FOR HELP PACKING/PREPARING FOR A TFMR https://www.messypregnancy.com/post/supplies-for-a-termination-for-medical-reasons Robin Imholte https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/birth-plans-download.html (D&E and labor plans BOTH available + packing list) FOR PELVIC FLOOR SUPPORT AFTER TFMR Tenae Bascherini https://www.instagram.com/tenaebascherini/   🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com   Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  4. Sep 12

    TFMR procedures - what we wish medical professionals would have explained

    After and within the huge decision to end a wanted pregnancy for health reasons, you have to make many many micro-decisions. And you can't know what you don't know - cue medical staff who can orient and guide us through it in the best of cases. In this episode I share from the community about procedure & memory making options you wish the doctors/staff/social workers/bereavement midwives did or could have EXPLAINED better, or OFFERED, or SAID through the whole diagnosis/termination. TFMR parents share their experiences with termination procedures and what they wished medical staff had explained & offered - as well as what did go right and what was the most helpful. I also talk about rituals/remembrance items/right language that ARE offered and used at many place people have terminations for medical reasons & what was the most impactful. To see the reviews of U.S. TFMR Hospitals and Clinics I am talking about in this episode go here: www.thetfmrdoula.com/reviews ... And in this episode I talk about all the TFMR circles and communities I gather. You're invited to join the space that could work for you, places just for TFMR parents: TFMR GRIEF CIRCLE PROGRAM: If you're longing for intimate, ongoing support with the same small group, apply now for the Ascend TFMR Grief Circle 💜 Small, intimate groups of 5–6 people, we stay together for 3 months 💬 Real conversations, healing practices, and community support 🌿 Wed. 7pm Eastern time round begins Oct. 7th, Sun. Noon Eastern time round begins Oct. 11th 👉 Info & joining us: http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/ascend-apply THE TFMR SUPPORT SANCTUARY: The TFMR Support Sanctuary: a monthly community for parents who want ways to release the shame, guilt, and despair of this loss and feel sure and seen in their motherhood, their parenthood, and the love they have for their baby. ‌ 💜 A safe place to feel whole again and honor your baby & feel the strength to get through another day 💬 Live circles every couple of weeks, replays always available and JUST as powerful 💜 Month-to-month, as you need support 🌸 $55/month ‌ Join us: http://⁠www.theTFMRdoula.com/join⁠ FREE FACEBOOK GROUP: Join other TFMR parents who just GET it and are here to listen and hold you. PLUS you'll get early access to new podcast episodes just like this one and a chance to ask questions live or have your comment/story be part of an episode. All in our private Facebook group, the TFMR Support Circle. Witness the raw, unedited version of my solo episodes before anyone else. Share your story in our CLOSED group, and hear how others like you are getting through. Application only, free membership: ⁠http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/facebookgroup ‌ 🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  5. Sep 9

    (Part 2 of 2) Life & recovery after TFMR for T21 & hydrops with Catt Gibbons

    Catt Gibbons shares (Part 2 of 2) about her mental and physical recovery after TFMR for T21 & hydrops, and how having so much compassion for herself after the decision has helped the most in her life after terminating her wanted pregnancy for health reasons. Catt talks about finding TFMR support groups as KEY to her healing. Advocating for herself and getting follow-up care with bleeding and retained placenta helped her physical recovery. Taking time to cry and to listen to music, and speaking out about TFMR has helped her so much. Being kind with herself when she finds herself feeling guilt or what-ifs, especially when reading miraculous survival stories, that are not our stories or reality. You can find Catt on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/catt.gibbons/ And you’re invited to join us in these TFMR spaces, just for parents who have had to end a wanted pregnancy for their or baby’s health: TFMR GRIEF CIRCLE PROGRAM: If you're longing for intimate, ongoing support with the same small group, apply now for the Ascend TFMR Grief Circle 💜 Small, intimate groups of 5–6 people, we stay together for 3 months 💬 Real conversations, healing practices, and community support 🌿 Wed. 7pm Eastern time round begins Oct. 7th, Sun. Noon Eastern time round begins Oct. 11th 👉 Info & joining us: http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/ascend-apply FREE FACEBOOK GROUP: Join other TFMR parents who just GET it and are here to listen and hold you. PLUS you'll get early access to new podcast episodes just like this one and a chance to ask questions live or have your comment/story be part of an episode. All in our private Facebook group, the TFMR Support Circle. Witness the raw, unedited version of my solo episodes before anyone else. Share your story in our CLOSED group, and hear how others like you are getting through. Application only, free membership: ⁠http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/facebookgroup ‌ 🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  6. Sep 8

    (Part 1 of 2) How Catt Gibbons decided to end her wanted pregnancy for T21 and hydrops | TFMR for Down's Syndrome & Hydrops

    Catt Gibbons shares (Part 1 of 2) how to be so kind and compassionate to yourself after TFMR. The compassion and care stared in how she decided to TFMR and the care she received through the process and procedure. Catt went through TFMR for her little boy Noah for a T21 and hydrops diagnosis. She found out her baby was poorly in pregnancy at 12 weeks along. From there the prenatal diagnosis of T21 followed, and follow-up for hydrops in the weeks that followed led Catt to need to end her wanted pregnancy. Listen in to Part 2 of 2 (coming out tomorrow) to hear about Catt’s mental and physical recovery after TFMR baby loss. You can find Catt on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/catt.gibbons/ And you’re invited to join us in these TFMR spaces, just for parents who have had to end a wanted pregnancy for their or baby’s health: TFMR GRIEF CIRCLE PROGRAM: If you're longing for intimate, ongoing support with the same small group, apply now for the Ascend TFMR Grief Circle 💜 Small, intimate groups of 5–6 people, we stay together for 3 months 💬 Real conversations, healing practices, and community support 🌿 Wed. 7pm Eastern time round begins Oct. 7th, Sun. Noon Eastern time round begins Oct. 11th 👉 Info & joining us: http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/ascend-apply FREE FACEBOOK GROUP: Join other TFMR parents who just GET it and are here to listen and hold you. PLUS you'll get early access to new podcast episodes just like this one and a chance to ask questions live or have your comment/story be part of an episode. All in our private Facebook group, the TFMR Support Circle. Witness the raw, unedited version of my solo episodes before anyone else. Share your story in our CLOSED group, and hear how others like you are getting through. Application only, free membership: ⁠http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/facebookgroup ‌ 🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  7. Sep 4

    TFMR is intentional birth - TFMR parents share their birth choice stories

    I recently watched an interview of someone who had carried to term after a grave diagnosis, and the interviewer kept going on and on about how “intentional” this choice was. Which, yes, it IS an intentional choice, but I was stuck by how TFMR is rarely seen as “so intentional and wonderful” AS WELL AS CTT (continuing to term). So I decided to bring light to the deep INTENTION within the termination for medical reasons experience, since it is so often not spoken about or very misunderstood. I went into our TFMR Support Circle Facebook group and asked fellow parents/moms/dads in there about THEIR stories of the intention in their decisions and births and birthing choices. This episode is for you if you’ve been feeling how TFMR is often misunderstood or seen as “less than.” You’ll hear me talk about why and where this systemic misunderstanding is coming from, and how that can even hurt us after the fact and make us question the love and intentionality in our loving choices. And in this episode we invite you to join us in the TFMR space that could work for you, places just for TFMR parents: TFMR GRIEF CIRCLE PROGRAM: If you're longing for intimate, ongoing support with the same small group, apply now for the Ascend TFMR Grief Circle 💜 Small, intimate groups of 5–6 people, we stay together for 3 months 💬 Real conversations, healing practices, and community support 🌿 Wed. 7pm Eastern time round begins Oct. 7th, Sun. Noon Eastern time round begins Oct. 11th 👉 Info & joining us: http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/ascend-apply THE TFMR SUPPORT SANCTUARY: The TFMR Support Sanctuary: a monthly community for parents who want ways to release the shame, guilt, and despair of this loss and feel sure and seen in their motherhood, their parenthood, and the love they have for their baby. ‌ 💜 A safe place to feel whole again and honor your baby & feel the strength to get through another day 💬 Live circles every couple of weeks, replays always available and JUST as powerful 💜 Month-to-month, as you need support 🌸 $55/month ‌ Join us: ⁠www.theTFMRdoula.com/join⁠ FREE FACEBOOK GROUP: Join other TFMR parents who just GET it and are here to listen and hold you. PLUS you'll get early access to new podcast episodes just like this one and a chance to ask questions live or have your comment/story be part of an episode. All in our private Facebook group, the TFMR Support Circle. Witness the raw, unedited version of solo episodes like this one before anyone else. Share your story in our CLOSED group, and hear how others like you are getting through. Application only, free membership: ⁠http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/facebookgroup ‌ 🎙 Want to share your story on the podcast? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod ( https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

  8. Aug 10

    Getting through the grief after a TFMR for brain anomalies & rare genetic condition - Morgan Meaut shares her baby Collins' story (part 2 of 2)

    Morgan continues sharing her story (part 2 of 2) of life and grief and healing after a termination for medical reasons for a rare genetic disorder in her baby girl Collins. … Morgan shares how this podcast and the community has helped immensely throughout her grief and TFMR journey over the months since her loss. Living in Atlanta, Georgia, Morgan faced steep legal difficulties to obtain a termination at nearly 24 weeks gestation. Ultimately, the state of Georgia approved her case, and she underwent a termination at 23 weeks and 6 days at an abortion clinic. It was the worst day of her life. Since the death of her daughter, Morgan has been on a journey of learning how to survive unimaginable grief while still showing up as a mother to her living child, and also learning how to continue being a mother to Collins — honoring her, loving her, and carrying her, even though she is no longer earthside. Resources mentioned: Self-care guide: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/tfmr-self-care.html Morgan's Instagram: www.instagram.com/morgan_love_11 Morgan's email: bmorganlove@yahoo.com To meet with Sabrina schedule your Connect Chat and find * your * way through with groups/1on1: http://www.thetfmrdoula.com/schedule-call And in this episode we invite you to join us in this space, just for TFMR parents: THE TFMR SUPPORT SANCTUARY ‌ If you're carrying the weight of your TFMR alone... you don't have to anymore. ‌ The TFMR Support Sanctuary: a monthly community for parents who want ways to release the shame, guilt, and despair of this loss and feel sure and seen in their motherhood, their parenthood, and the love they have for their baby. ‌ 💜 A safe place to feel whole again and honor your baby & feel the strength to get through another day 💬 Live circles every couple of weeks, replays always available and JUST as powerful 💜 Month-to-month, as you need support 🌸 $55/month ‌ Join us: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/join ‌ ... FREE FACEBOOK GROUP: Join other TFMR parents who just GET it and are here to listen and hold you. PLUS you'll get early access to new podcast episodes and a chance to ask questions live. All in our private Facebook group, the TFMR Support Circle. You'll get to witness the raw, unedited version of my solo episodes before anyone else. You can also join in live and share your comments and get your questions answered to shape the episodes. ‌ Application only, free membership: ⁠http://www.theTFMRdoula.com/facebookgroup ‌ ... 🎙 Want to share your story? Email Sabrina to be featured on the podcast: sabrina [at] theTFMRdoula [dot] com ‌ ... Music credit: "Pamgaea" Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300036&Search=Search ) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

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9 Ratings

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Pregnancy loss grief support for parents who terminated a wanted pregnancy for medical reasons. Real TFMR stories, decision support, and understanding in the isolation.Host Sabrina Fletcher is a TFMR loss mom & pregnancy loss doula who understands your choice and experience. Episodes include real TFMR parent stories + support from grief therapists & baby loss professionals.Facing a TFMR decision or grieving after, you'll find community here:Support & connection: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/facebookgroup.htmlDecision Support call: https://www.thetfmrdoula.com/decision-support.html

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