Thrive While Loving an Addict | Addiction | Sobriety | Recovery | Relapse

KL Wells
  • 4.4 (5)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

More than 50% of American families have a loved one or close relative who is an addict or alcoholic. Although there are ample resources to help these individuals recover, their families suffer, too. Parents, spouses, children, and friends need help navigating this unexpected, challenging disease. Welcome to Thrive While Loving an Addict with KL Wells. She brings together loved ones and family members of addicts and alcoholics. Their insights and perspectives create a community of healing, connecting, and rebuilding. While your addict may be working hard to make themselves better, you may feel left behind to face a different kind of battle. The negative stigma of having a loved one as an addict causes a lot of pain. How are you dealing with loneliness, fear, and shame? There are quick fixes for these difficult moments in your life. Now you can get real and raw advice from people who are walking and dealing with the path you’re on. This podcast highlights the vulnerable and courageous voices of these families. Listen to real-life stories of people who have addicted loved ones, and discover how they addressed the hardships. Also, hear the experiences of recovering addicts that share what is, and isn't, working in their journey towards healing. Gather useful tools and practical advice to alleviate your own journey by delving into these touching and inspiring stories. Contemplate what may not be working, and discover what it takes to face the challenges along the way. This podcast offers a safe platform for the loved ones of addicts. Rise to the challenge, and become a key player in being a part of this fresh community. There are also episodes that will widen your knowledge about addiction recovery. Get educated by real life experiences of people who reveal their journey to help addicts and alcoholics jump back on their feet. In addition to breaking down their practice, they bring a glimmer of hope for what can be done for individuals who may have given up on themselves. KL Wells is a community leader and influential speaker who led initiatives with senior executives, trustees, and board directors of various non-profit organizations. For more than twenty years, she focused on empowering leaders to create extraordinary human impact. Spending time with these people inspired her to do more, and start the company Voices InCourage. Most importantly, KL understands how painful it is to have an addicted loved one. She was married to an alcoholic, her current partner is recovering from alcohol addiction, and her son is an active addict. The mission of this podcast is not just advocacy. It hits very close to home to KL. Her reflections as a wife and mother are something you should not miss. Seeing your loved ones pulled down by drugs and alcohol is truly heartbreaking. As a result, you may feel miserable and isolated. You also have to deal with negative opinions from others, and it is up to you to fend for yourself. Nobody deserves to be treated this way. No one should go through this challenging episode of life alone. This is what KL offers in this podcast: the strength to move forward and guidance to have the courage to change. If you have the courage to use your voice, you can become an inspiration for your friend, spouse, parent, or child as they overcome their addictive behavior. Ultimately, it’s about transforming the lives of loved ones from surviving to thriving in the midst of chaos. Listen to Thrive While Loving an Addict with KL Wells at https://voicesincourage.com/podcast.

  1. “Nothing Is Working” Usually Means You’re Fighting the Wrong Battle

    FEB 10

    “Nothing Is Working” Usually Means You’re Fighting the Wrong Battle

    Episode SummaryIn this episode, podcast producer Steve Cary joins host KL Wells for an honest and reflective conversation about what it means to thrive while loving someone in active addiction. KL shares lessons from her 20-year journey with her son Sam, including his nearly three years of sustained recovery. Together, they explore the perspective that shaped KL’s healing path: the belief that life is happening for you, not to you. KL discusses how loving with boundaries helped her reclaim her own agency and emotional stability. She reflects on why feeling like nothing is working often signals that families are trying to manage addiction itself rather than focusing on outcomes that support their own well-being. This conversation offers grounded insight into fear, uncertainty, relapse, and the personal growth that can happen alongside a loved one’s recovery journey. Key Discussion PointsReframing hardship through the perspective that life is happening for you, not to youThe difference between loving with boundaries and rescuing or enablingBrain science and addiction survival wiring and how it shapes behaviorWhy feeling like nothing is working may signal you are trying to control addiction rather than your own healingSetting clear personal boundaries, including removing financial or rescue-based supportSelf-care as a survival skill, including emotional processing, tapping, movement, and time in natureManaging fear and internal stories during periods of silence in recoveryViewing relapse as part of a longer learning process rather than a single failureShifting from focusing on a loved one’s outcomes to identifying your own Some Questions I AskWhere were you in your journey when you were able to respond with boundaries instead of rescuing?For listeners who feel nothing is working, how can they begin to see a path forward?Was there something different about your son’s most recent turn toward recovery?What are a few early steps for someone who feels overwhelmed, stuck, or afraid? In This Episode, You Will LearnWhy the feeling that nothing is working can signal you are focused on the wrong battleHow loving boundaries can support both compassion and self-protectionHow shifting focus toward your own outcomes can create emotional stabilityEarly support steps that many families find helpful, including peer support and learning from others’ experiencesWhy addiction can disrupt survival priorities in the brain and create unpredictable behaviorli...

    25 min
  2. Why Healing Yourself Is the First Step to Breaking Generational Cycles of Shame – Part 2

    JAN 27

    Why Healing Yourself Is the First Step to Breaking Generational Cycles of Shame – Part 2

    Episode Summary In Part 2 of this compassionate conversation, host KL Wells continues her dialogue with Denise Frenette on what it truly means to heal while loving someone with addiction. Together, they explore how forgiveness, boundaries, and emotional honesty can exist without minimizing harm or excusing destructive behavior. Denise reflects on her own journey of reconciling love for her father with the reality of his addiction. She shares how releasing judgment, challenging secrecy, and choosing understanding over blame can help interrupt generational patterns of shame and inherited trauma. This episode centers the healing of the loved one, not as abandonment, but as a necessary step toward truth, freedom, and peace. Key Discussion Points Holding love and truth at the same time when addiction has caused real harmWhat forgiveness is and what it is notMoving through anger, sadness, and grief without getting stuck in themReframing harm through the lens of “nothing is personal”Choosing moments of joy while a loved one continues to struggleWhy boundaries are essential to healing, including stepping back when neededHow secrecy and silence reinforce shame across generationsTelling the whole truth as a form of honoring, not betrayal Some Questions I Ask How can I love my father and still say, “This was wrong”?What does forgiveness really mean, and what are the most common misconceptions about it?How do we stop taking addictive behavior personally?Is it possible to experience joy while someone we love is suffering?When are boundaries necessary for healing, even if they feel painful?How do we move from anger to understanding without excusing harm?Why does humanizing the person who hurt us help set us free?How do we hold the full truth of our family story without rewriting it? In This Episode, You Will Learn Why healing yourself is not abandonment, but responsibilityHow forgiveness can free you without minimizing harmWhy emotions are a pathway rather than a destinationHow boundaries support compassion rather than weaken itWays to challenge inherited shame without rewriting historyHow honesty can...

    27 min
  3. Why Healing Yourself Is the First Step to Breaking Generational Cycles of Shame

    JAN 13

    Why Healing Yourself Is the First Step to Breaking Generational Cycles of Shame

    Episode SummaryIn this powerful episode, host KL Wells sits down with Denise Frenette, a Canadian spiritual synergist, life coach, and author of the newly released book, More. Denise opens up about the birthing process of her book and the profound realization that she could not teach others about manifestation and habit-breaking without first confronting her own origin story. Denise shares the raw reality of growing up with a father who was a functioning alcoholic, a gambler, and at times violent, all while maintaining the perfect family image in their community. Through the lens of her father’s passing and the subsequent discovery of the financial devastation he left behind, Denise discusses the difficult journey of moving from intellectual understanding to deep heart work. This conversation explores how to acknowledge the trauma of the past with grace, the duality of loving an addict while hating their actions, and why personal healing is the essential portal to breaking generational cycles of shame. Key Discussion PointsThe Acknowledge Phase: Why Denise had to move past denial to respectfully acknowledge what was wrong in her childhood before she could truly heal.The Facade of Perfection: Growing up in a church-going, perfect family and the immense shame associated with any behavior that threatened that public image.The Duality of Love and Pain: Navigating the conundrum of how to acknowledge a parent's harmful behavior without losing the ability to love them.The Breaking Point: How her father’s death and the discovery of his hidden gambling debts acted as the drop in the bucket that forced Denise to step into her authentic self.Fear as an Acronym: Exploring the concept of F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) and how it keeps us from transparency.The Evolution of Healing: Understanding that healing is not a one-and-done event but an ongoing discovery process. Some Questions I AskHow can I acknowledge what is going on and still love them at the same time?Was that curiosity about your dad's upbringing born in that experience?Do you think the curiosity and the willingness to step into discovery is the first step in breaking generational cycles?What was the portal or the moment that cracked you wide open to explore the gifts and lessons embedded in this experience? In This Episode, You Will LearnWhy intellectualizing your trauma is not the same as healing your heart.The importance of viewing the boy behind the man to understand the roots of addiction and behavior.How to transition from anger to sadness and finally to curiosity and discovery.Why anger is...

    36 min
  4. How to Survive the Holiday Grief Spiral When Addiction Has Taken Someone

    12/30/2025

    How to Survive the Holiday Grief Spiral When Addiction Has Taken Someone

    In this deeply moving and honest episode, host KL Wells is joined by Jim Horton, a father who tragically lost his 19-year-old son, Zach, to an opiate addiction. Recorded during the holiday season, a particularly challenging time for many, this conversation offers a raw and authentic look at the rollercoaster ride of grief. Jim shares his personal story, from the initial shock and all-consuming pain to his journey of healing and finding new purpose. He and KL explore the paralyzing stigma of addiction, the complexities of the recovery landscape, and the critical need for community for both those struggling with addiction and the families who love them. This episode is a powerful testament to the long, non-linear path of grief and a beacon of hope for anyone feeling lost in the darkness of loss. Key Discussion PointsThe profound impact of stigma and how it prevents families from seeking and receiving help.Understanding that the recovery landscape is wide and looks different for teenagers versus adults.The family's parallel journey of recovery and the importance of their own healing.Navigating the intense, unpredictable emotions of grief, especially during the holidays.The distinction between sobriety as simple abstinence and recovery as an active, ongoing journey toward a better life.Finding purpose and a path forward through service and contribution after a devastating loss.The power of community and why no one should have to walk this path alone. Some Questions I AskHow can we shift our perspective to see relapse not as a total failure, but as part of a longer recovery journey?What are the first steps a parent can take when they feel paralyzed by their child's addiction?How do we navigate the shoulds and self-blame that often accompany loving someone with an addiction?For those deep in grief, what does the path toward finding moments of peace or even joy look like? In This Episode, You Will LearnWhy treating addiction as a disease, not a moral failing, is crucial for both the individual and their family.The importance of exploring city and county resources for addiction and recovery support, which are often overlooked.That grief is not a linear process; it is a rollercoaster with ups and downs, and it is okay to not be okay.Practical strategies to interrupt negative thought patterns and head trash when you feel yourself spiraling.That your own recovery journey as a loved one is just as important as the person's journey with addiction.There is hope for finding light and purpose again, even after the most profound loss. Links and Resources: The Zachary Horton Foundation Learn more about Jim’s work to end the stigma of addiction, spread awareness, and support individuals and families in his community. 🌐 https://zacharyhortonfoundation.org/ zacharyhortonfoundation.org Thrive While Loving an Addict (Podcast & Community) Listen to the Thrive While Loving an Addict podcast by KL Wells and find community support for parents and loved ones of those struggling with addiction. 📍 https://voicesincourage.com/podcast County Mental Health and Addiction Services As mentioned in the episode, a critical and often underutilized resource. To find support near you, search for: 🔎 "[Your County] mental...

    47 min
  5. She Left Everything Behind - and Found What Was Missing

    12/16/2025

    She Left Everything Behind - and Found What Was Missing

    In this episode, host KL Wells welcomes Pamela Tosh, an energy healer and yoga teacher joining us from Cape Town, South Africa. Pamela shares her incredible story of resilience and transformation, from a childhood marked by emotional abuse and early struggles with addiction to a profound spiritual awakening in the Himalayas. She recounts how her journey to India for yoga teacher training became the turning point that allowed her to release stored trauma, break the cycle of addiction, and find her true purpose. Join us for a powerful conversation about the limitations of conventional rehab, the healing power of spiritual connection, and how a life dedicated to service can lead to your own liberation. Pamela’s story is a testament to the fact that it is never too late to rewrite your script and create a life of authenticity, purpose, and joy. Key Discussion PointsPamela’s story of origin, growing up in an environment of emotional abuse and alcohol dependency in South Africa.The powerful, life-altering journey to India that sparked a deep spiritual awakening and healing from trauma.The concept of being addicted to a "3D reality" and how to break free from societal conditioning.Karma Yoga, or meditation in action, and how serving her community became a cornerstone of her recovery.The critical need for sustainable, holistic, and long-term approaches to addiction recovery.How to practice emotional detachment to find peace and stillness, even in the midst of chaos. Some Questions I AskWould you please give our listeners a window into your story of origin?Did you step away from addiction when you got pregnant?Talk about your first journey to India. Was that an experience of awakening for you?How do you describe your formula for thriving? In This Episode, You Will LearnThe limitations of short-term rehabilitation programs and the importance of creating a sustainable, long-term healing plan.How stored trauma and emotions manifest physically in the body and how practices like yoga can help release them.The concept of Karma Yoga and how selfless service can be a powerful tool for healing and finding purpose.Techniques for practicing emotional detachment and finding inner peace, even when surrounded by chaos.The importance of withdrawing the senses to move past physical attachments and connect more deeply with your spiritual self.Why telling your truth is a fundamental practice for living an authentic life and breaking free from toxic relationship patterns.How to find daily excitement and inspiration to...

    46 min
  6. How to Survive the Unthinkable: Lessons from Antarctica, Addiction, and Saying Goodbye

    12/02/2025

    How to Survive the Unthinkable: Lessons from Antarctica, Addiction, and Saying Goodbye

    In this powerful episode, host KL Wells welcomes the extraordinary Mike Pierce, also known as "Antarctic Mike." Mike shares his incredible life story, from conquering the Antarctic Ice Marathon to navigating the profound challenges of his late wife Angela's 36-year battle with chronic pain and opioid addiction. This episode is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit, offering a raw and honest look at the parallel journey of loving someone through addiction and loss. Mike's story is one of turning pain into purpose, finding strength in the darkest of times, and learning to embrace life's most difficult moments as opportunities for growth and connection. Antarctic Who?Mike Pierce, better known as Antarctic Mike, works with organizations that want to find, engage and keep the best performing people. Mike’s background professionally started in the recruiting business in 1997, working specifically to show managers and leaders exactly how to identify and recruit the best people. He now speaks across the US and Canada to executive teams, organizations, associations and sales teams about how to lead people so they are fully engaged in what they do. Mike is an avid fan of polar expedition history and is an endurance athlete. In 2006, Mike became one of 9 people to run the first ever Antarctic Ice Marathon and a year later became the first American to run the Antarctic 100k, a grueling 62 miles on an ice shelf 600 miles from the South Pole. His flagship program, Leading at 90 Below Zero, connects the drivers and principles of Antarctic expedition history stories to the real world of finding, engaging and keeping great people in today’s business world. Mike has a BA from the University of Colorado, Boulder, and resides in Encinitas, California. Key Discussion Points• Mike's journey to Antarctica and how it prepared him for life's greatest challenges. • Angela's battle with chronic pain and subsequent opioid addiction. • The family's journey through the cycles of addiction, recovery, and relapse. • The emotional and psychological toll on the caregiver in a relationship with an addict. • The power of mindset and perspective in navigating trauma and loss. • The importance of letting go and embracing the present moment. • Finding hope and new beginnings after profound loss. Some Questions I Ask• How did you navigate holding the space for her suffering? • What are the gifts and lessons embedded in this experience for you? • How do you reconcile the difference between quitting and surrendering? In This Episode, You Will Learn• How to find strength and resilience in the face of overwhelming adversity. • The importance of viewing difficulty as a teacher and an opportunity for growth. • How to support a loved one through addiction while also caring for your own well-being. • The power of letting go of resistance and embracing the present moment. • How to find hope and purpose after the loss of a loved one. • That pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice. ResourcesConnect with Mike Pierce: You can find more about Mike's incredible story, his speaking engagements, and his book by searching for "Antarctic Mike" on Google. You can also find his TED Talk on YouTube. Social LinksLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/antarcticmike/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Antarctic-Mike-Speaks-1617958015119843/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/AntarcticMike/ TED Talk: a...

    51 min
  7. The Moment She Realized Her Son’s Addiction Wasn’t Her Failure

    11/18/2025

    The Moment She Realized Her Son’s Addiction Wasn’t Her Failure

    In this powerful and deeply personal episode, host KL Wells sits down with fellow podcaster Krista Zaft to explore the generational cycles of addiction and the profound healing that comes from breaking them. Krista shares her story of growing up with an alcoholic father, unconsciously repeating familiar patterns in her own marriage, and facing one of the biggest challenges of her life: her son's addiction. This conversation is a candid look at how childhood trauma shapes our adult lives, leading to traits like perfectionism, codependency, and a need for control. Krista walks us through her pivotal "awakening" moments—first, as a young mother confronting her own anger, and later, as she stepped onto a path of parallel recovery alongside her son. Together, KL and Krista unravel the isolating nature of shame and illuminate the life-changing power of community, personal responsibility, and finding hope in the midst of chaos. Key Discussion PointsHow childhood chaos can lead us to unconsciously recreate similar dynamics in our adult relationshipsThe profound impact of family tragedy on the cycle of addictionKrista’s "awakening" moment with her daughter that led her to seek therapy for the first timeNavigating a child’s addiction and the journey of organizing a family interventionThe concept of parallel recovery and the importance of doing your own healing work alongside your loved oneThe isolating role of shame for parents of addicts and the power of community supportUnderstanding the traits of Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA) and how these patterns show up in adulthood 👤 About Our Guest: Krista ZaftKrista Zaft is a clarity and confidence coach, speaker, and host of the Becoming Sound podcast. Her work is rooted in helping women heal from the ripple effects of generational addiction and create lives grounded in authenticity, mental clarity, and emotional well-being. With a background shaped by personal experience, Krista’s voice is a guiding light for those navigating the messy middle of recovery and transformation. Her podcast, Becoming Sound, is a space for raw, unfiltered conversations about life after dysfunction and the journey toward healing in mind, body, and spirit. 🔗 Follow Krista and Learn More🌐 Website: kristazaft.com🎧 Podcast on Apple: Becoming Sound🎧 Podcast on Spotify: Becoming Sound📺 YouTube: @kristazaft📸 Instagram: @zaftkrista📩 Email: krista@kristazaft.com

    53 min
  8. How to Rebuild a Relationship After Addiction Shatters the Old One

    11/04/2025

    How to Rebuild a Relationship After Addiction Shatters the Old One

    In this deeply moving episode, host KL Wells is joined by Dr. Janelle Martin, a functional medicine doctor and counselor from Houston. Dr. Martin shares the raw and transformative story of her daughter's journey through addiction and her own parallel path to recovery. She opens up about the hidden family traumas—divorce, parental alienation, and abuse—that served as the backdrop for her daughter's substance use, which began as a way to numb immense pain. Dr. Martin recounts the heart-wrenching moment of discovery, the difficult decisions that followed, and the critical importance of finding the right support for both her daughter and herself. This conversation is a powerful testament to the strength found in community, the healing that comes from vulnerability, and the profound truth that a parent's recovery is a crucial, independent journey that can change everything. Key Discussion PointsThe profound impact of childhood trauma, divorce, and parental alienation on a child's vulnerability to addiction.The slow, painful, and often-denied process of a parent realizing their child is using drugs.The crisis point that forces a parent to set firm boundaries and seek external help.Navigating the overwhelming process of finding an effective treatment program for an adolescent.The life-changing discovery of community and the critical role of parent support groups.How the 12-step program became a transformative gift for a parent, helping her heal and grow.The process of rebuilding a mother-daughter relationship from the ground up through honesty, vulnerability, and shared recovery.The journey of co-authoring a book, Losing Her, Finding Us, to share both the mother's and daughter's perspectives. Some Questions I Ask:When did the light bulb go off for you that you had your own recovery in this?Can you tell us about how your book, co-authored with your daughter, came to be?What are the top non-negotiable things you do to take care of yourself? In This Episode, You Will LearnHow hidden family trauma can be a significant root cause of addiction.Why a parent's own recovery journey is essential, regardless of their child's choices.That finding a community of peers is "mission critical" for parents navigating a child's addiction.How the 12-step process can be a powerful tool for personal transformation for anyone.That it is possible to rebuild a deep, meaningful relationship with a child in recovery.The power of sharing your story to break through shame and offer a lifeline to others. ResourcesGuest Website & Book: Learn more about Dr. Janelle Martin and her daughter's story, and order their book, Losing Her, Finding Us: A Mother’s Fight, A Daughter’s Journey, and The Road to Recovery, at ourbeautifulrecovery.comDr. Martin's Practice: Discover the work Dr. Martin does with brain health and neurofeedback at the TMC Brain Health Center in Houston: tmcbrainhealthcenter.comCommunity Support: Find a local meeting for support and connection:Al-Anon Family GroupsParents of Addicted Loved Ones (PAL)

    50 min
See All (94)

Ratings & Reviews

4.4
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

More than 50% of American families have a loved one or close relative who is an addict or alcoholic. Although there are ample resources to help these individuals recover, their families suffer, too. Parents, spouses, children, and friends need help navigating this unexpected, challenging disease. Welcome to Thrive While Loving an Addict with KL Wells. She brings together loved ones and family members of addicts and alcoholics. Their insights and perspectives create a community of healing, connecting, and rebuilding. While your addict may be working hard to make themselves better, you may feel left behind to face a different kind of battle. The negative stigma of having a loved one as an addict causes a lot of pain. How are you dealing with loneliness, fear, and shame? There are quick fixes for these difficult moments in your life. Now you can get real and raw advice from people who are walking and dealing with the path you’re on. This podcast highlights the vulnerable and courageous voices of these families. Listen to real-life stories of people who have addicted loved ones, and discover how they addressed the hardships. Also, hear the experiences of recovering addicts that share what is, and isn't, working in their journey towards healing. Gather useful tools and practical advice to alleviate your own journey by delving into these touching and inspiring stories. Contemplate what may not be working, and discover what it takes to face the challenges along the way. This podcast offers a safe platform for the loved ones of addicts. Rise to the challenge, and become a key player in being a part of this fresh community. There are also episodes that will widen your knowledge about addiction recovery. Get educated by real life experiences of people who reveal their journey to help addicts and alcoholics jump back on their feet. In addition to breaking down their practice, they bring a glimmer of hope for what can be done for individuals who may have given up on themselves. KL Wells is a community leader and influential speaker who led initiatives with senior executives, trustees, and board directors of various non-profit organizations. For more than twenty years, she focused on empowering leaders to create extraordinary human impact. Spending time with these people inspired her to do more, and start the company Voices InCourage. Most importantly, KL understands how painful it is to have an addicted loved one. She was married to an alcoholic, her current partner is recovering from alcohol addiction, and her son is an active addict. The mission of this podcast is not just advocacy. It hits very close to home to KL. Her reflections as a wife and mother are something you should not miss. Seeing your loved ones pulled down by drugs and alcohol is truly heartbreaking. As a result, you may feel miserable and isolated. You also have to deal with negative opinions from others, and it is up to you to fend for yourself. Nobody deserves to be treated this way. No one should go through this challenging episode of life alone. This is what KL offers in this podcast: the strength to move forward and guidance to have the courage to change. If you have the courage to use your voice, you can become an inspiration for your friend, spouse, parent, or child as they overcome their addictive behavior. Ultimately, it’s about transforming the lives of loved ones from surviving to thriving in the midst of chaos. Listen to Thrive While Loving an Addict with KL Wells at https://voicesincourage.com/podcast.

Information