Decoding Attachment Styles

Annalisa Bahadur

Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it. I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse. But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients. This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships. In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant.  We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now. We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries. Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt. This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful. If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place. Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit. 

  1. 1d ago

    What to Do When Avoidant Pull Away

    It’s crushing when your avoidant partner disappears. But why are they doing it...and what can you do.  On of the most disruptive things happening in avoidant- anxious relationships is when the avoidant partner suddenly disappears without an explanation.  We want to understand their motives, explain how this hurts us, try harder but perhaps if we understand why they tend to do this we can rest at ease - or make some hard decisions that will benefit us.  This podcast is meant to guide you if you're going through this or if you've gone through this.  For my book - From Anxious to Secure - https://stan.store/DecodingAttachmentStyles/p/from-anxious-to-secure For my mini online program - Boundary Bootcamp - https://stan.store/DecodingAttachmentStyles/p/boundary-bootcamp To book a session with me - https://stan.store/DecodingAttachmentStyles/p/book-a-session-with-me-ui52g6pv To Subscribe to School of Attachment - https://stan.store/DecodingAttachmentStyles/p/weekly-coaching-tools--strategies Disclaimer: I am a certified coach with a psychology background, not a licensed therapist. The content I share is for educational and informational purposes and is based on Attachment Theory principles. I am currently funding and researching a personal project on attachment behaviors and feelings with 175 individuals. This page is not a substitute for professional therapy, diagnosis, or treatment. Please use discernment and consult a qualified mental health professional for personal advice. I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode. Support the show

    29 min
5
out of 5
42 Ratings

About

Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it. I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse. But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients. This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships. In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant.  We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now. We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries. Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt. This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful. If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place. Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit. 

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