Habits for Your Happily Ever After: Relationship Communication Advice

Rebecca Mullen
  • 4.9 (28)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Updated Weekly

Each episode offers a date-night-discussion to foster conversation, as well as a tiny habit to keep you and the one you love connected: Because happily ever after isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. Habits for Your Happily Ever After is a place to get clear about your marriage communication. Because when your relationships are strong, you’re able to concentrate at work, reduce conflict at home, and receive support for your dreams so you have courage to live your best life. Relationship Coach, Rebecca Mullen, hosts the show filled with stories about relationship struggles and successes.

  1. 4d ago

    6 Kinds of Fun for Your Relationship

    What kills a fun time faster than anything else? Someone who doesn’t want to be there. Not everyone has fun in the same way. When you understand what’s fun for you, it’s easier to ask your partner if they want to join you in having your kind of fun. Today we’ll talk about 6 types of fun (but there are plenty of others). Fall into FlowBolt of JoyContentmentFidgetingSomething MessySomething Clean Habit for Your Happily Ever After This week’s habit for your happily ever after is to create or refine one flavor of fun that is fun for you. Do you want to borrow from my 6 types of fun? Or do you have an entirely different flavor of fun that I have missed? Date Night Discussion This week I invite you to tell your partner about a specific sort of fun you want to put into your life. My invitation is to either: Invite your partner to share some fun with you, orTo describe the sort of fun you want to have on your own or with a friend. Consider this date night discussion a chance to either issue a clear invitation to your partner or to announce that you want to go have fun alone, but you promise to return and bring a whole bunch of happiness home with you. Want more? Review my number one rule for relationship happiness: Stay in your own business Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    26 min

  2. Jun 25

    49 Years Later, They're Still Each Other's Favorite Date

    What does it look like to build a marriage where kindness becomes second nature? I spend a lot of time helping couples figure out how to make their relationship work. Today, you'll hear a conversation with Jamee and Doug Simons, a couple who have spent nearly 50 years creating the marriage many people hope to build. You’ll hear what it was like for Jamee and Doug to take of a family business and balance their partnership at work with cultivating a loving marriage at homeAnd you’ll hear how the kindness and generosity they foster in their community is ever-present in their relationship. Jamee and Doug are third-generation owners of Enstrom Candies. They bought the business from Jamee's parents, Emil and Mary, in 1993. It's not easy to work side by side all day, then go home to raise children. They did it for decades. While Doug and Jamee were quick to admit there have been bumps along the way, I was struck by the generosity they bring to their relationship, their commitment to supporting each other, and their refusal to keep score. I hope their story inspires you as much as it inspired me. Connect with my guest Read their story: enstrom.com/pages/our-story Website: enstrom.com Instagram: instagram.com/enstromcandies Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    1h 8m

  3. Jun 18

    Better Communication Begins with You

    Today, I bring you an interview when I was a guest on the podcast, Stronger in the Difficult Places, with psychotherapist, author, speaker, and media contributor Dr. Zoe Shaw. On her podcast, Stronger in the Difficult Places, her guiding premise is: “We’re not fixing them, we’re fixing you, and that changes everything.” Dr. Shaw has been a guest on this podcast before to discuss the impact of shame on your relationship. In this episode, you’ll hear me talk about my book, 6 Steps to Better Marriage Communication. Discover more from Dr. Zoe Shaw Read Dr. Zoe Shaw’s book, or listen to her podcast, Stronger in the Difficult PlacesListen to episode 54: Let Go of Shame. Own Your Story to Improve Your Relationship with Dr. Zoe ShawListen to episode 55: More Dr. Zoe: Expectations, Shame + A Magic QuestionListen to episode 125: Shame Stops the Love You Feel with Dr. Zoe Shaw Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    51 min

  4. Jun 11

    What if They Don't Need You to Fix it? with Dr. David Marcus

    You hate seeing your partner suffer. So, you jump to solutions. When someone we love is hurting, our instinct is often to fix it. But rarely do any of us want a solution. We need a soothing presence—someone who can sit with the discomfort long enough for the pressure to ease and your words to emerge. Today, I’m joined by Dr. David Marcus. We discuss how you can become a soothing presence in the lives of the people you love most and why that is key to emotional regulation. You’ll understand why you’re more likely to blame, jump to anger, or generally decompensate when you’re so full of emotion you can’t see straightAnd why it helps so much to have someone else be a soothing presence who will let you empty your emotions by simply talking and processingMostly, though, you’ll learn how to become that soothing presence so that you can calm the ones you love. Want more? Listen to my podcast episode about the pressure relief value Connect with my guest Dr. David Marcus's extensive expertise and commitment to improving the lives of individuals and families have made him a highly respected figure in the field of Clinical Psychology. His 40 years of experience in treating families under stress have made him a sought after clinical and legal resource in the Cincinnati area on the topics of parent-child communication and child advocacy. Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    1h 1m

  5. Jun 4

    Protective Defensive Maneuvers vs “Presenting the Deeper Me”

    “Why don’t you ever initiate sex?!” vs cuddling up and kissing your sweetheart’s back. Which do you typically choose? Do you hide your heart in the precise moment you want to be loved? Or are you willing to disclose that super tender underbelly? Today we look at why it’s tempting to hide behind Protective Defensive Maneuvers (PDM’s) because when you start with compassion, change is easier. You’ll understand why you resort to PDM’s and understanding helps you forgive yourself and begin again differently.We’ll find some fun PDM turn-arounds like Presenting the Deeper Me.And we’ll reach into the archives for a very sly PDM (the protective kind) that might be part of your everyday language. Want more? Read my blog post about the word "should"Listen to episode #1 about how misunderstandings grow from disinformation in your relationship. Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    17 min

  6. May 28

    Recognize the Trigger. Rewrite the Story with Michael and Penny Gold

    You and your partner are the authors of your relationship story. But what happens when your childhood triggers begin writing the script? Today, my guests are Michael and Penny Gold from Relationship Alchemy. They share examples of relationship triggers and how to recognize the patterns underneath themThey'll invite you to see how you can create a tiny ritual that strengthens intimacyAnd they have an endless supply of 10-minute dates to refresh your relationship Triggers Identified, Demystified, and Disarmed Have you ever found yourself in the middle of a conflict and wondered, "Why is this bothering me so much?" Penny has 40 years of clinical work to help you identify and disarm the triggers that are currently adding drama to your relationship. Triggers can stop you from receiving the love your partner wants to give you. So, Penny will also help you calm your system down so that you can actually truly receive the appreciation and love your partner is offering. Michael has an enormous rabbinical history in storytelling and meaning-making. Habit for Your Happily Ever After Take Penny and Michael’s customizable 10-Minute date quiz and create a simple ritual of connection together. Even a few intentional minutes can strengthen intimacy and help you reconnect. Connect with Michael and Penny Gold Michael is an ordained rabbi, ceremonialist, and transformational guide with decades of pastoral experience working with couples and families. Penny is a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in trauma, attachment, and relational healing. Together they lead sacred ceremonies, couples retreats, and medicine journeys guided by the methodology that transformed their own marriage. You can visit their website to learn more and take the 10-minute date quiz. Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    37 min

  7. May 21

    What if You’re Both Wrong? The Seductive Power of Either/Or

    Why is either/or thinking toxic for your relationship? Because it boxes out possibilities. Why is either/or thinking so tempting? Because it simplifies our complicated lives. Today we’re noticing how toxic the unconscious but super seductive question “Either/Or” can be. I’ll take you through 3 reasons your brain loves to default to either/or thinking and how to use 2 words to free your mind from the limitations that either/or thinking can impart.Then I’ll offer you the magic words that will open your mind.And not only will I share with you the far-reaching consequences of this paradigm shift, we’ll practice together so you can hear how shifting the question shifts your mindset. Habit for Your Happily Ever After Practice changing sentence structures from either/or to both/and. Date Night Discussion This week I invite you to employ the word "because" to change either/or thinking into an invitation for you and your sweetheart to cultivate your happily ever after. Want more? In this episode, I talk about how resistance is where suffering lives.I talk a lot about how changing the words you use when you talk to your partner can change your relationship. Discover the power of hello and how “yes-but” kills connection. Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    32 min

  8. May 14

    How Do You Say Hello to Your Partner?

    One word can change the character of your relationship. Don’t believe me? I invite you to notice how you say hello to your partner. Does your hello say, “I’m glad to see you!” or is your hello flavored with the taste of goodbye? I am always sending people to episode #8 of my podcast where I tell the story of how hello changed the course of my relationship with my husband. This week, I’m bringing the episode back from the archives. Habit for Your Happily Ever After To help you avoid a sandpapery hello, and to cultivate a tender goodbye with your partner, notice the character of your hello and goodbye. Date Night Discussion This week, ask your partner about their most memorable goodbye. Connect to Improve Your Relationship Communication Visit the show notes. Buy my book. Listen to my book. Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers. Follow me on Tik Tok. Follow me on Instagram. Reach me at 970-210-4480

    18 min
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4.9
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About

Each episode offers a date-night-discussion to foster conversation, as well as a tiny habit to keep you and the one you love connected: Because happily ever after isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. Habits for Your Happily Ever After is a place to get clear about your marriage communication. Because when your relationships are strong, you’re able to concentrate at work, reduce conflict at home, and receive support for your dreams so you have courage to live your best life. Relationship Coach, Rebecca Mullen, hosts the show filled with stories about relationship struggles and successes.

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