Middle Fingers Up

Kiran Randhawa

Welcome to Middle Fingers Up, the show where we keep our heads high and our middle fingers higher. We explore relationships, mental health and everything in between. Join me, Kiran Randhawa on the journey to learn, grow and find our voice.

  1. 1D AGO

    EP.157 - Rama Swami - "Silence & Stigma Have No Place In The Room"

    In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, we sit down with Rama Swamy, a pelvic floor practitioner and physiotherapist who immigrated from India, for a necessary and overdue conversation about women’s health — the parts we were never taught to understand, name, or advocate for. Drawing from her lived experience with pregnancy, birth, and postpartum recovery, Rama shares how cultural taboos, education gaps, and the normalization of women’s pain led her to specialize in pelvic health. Together, we unpack how silence — at home, in culture, in schools, and in healthcare systems — teaches women to endure rather than investigate what’s happening in their bodies. From the isolating period stories many South Asian women grew up with, to the ongoing fear around teaching children about bodies, hormones, and autonomy, this conversation challenges the idea that symptoms like chronic stress, mood swings, poor sleep, pain, or recurring infections are “just normal.” A key part of this episode focuses on teaching body literacy early — long before puberty or “the talk.” We explore how everyday moments, starting as young as diaper changes, can lay the foundation for consent, confidence, and body awareness, and how early education helps reduce shame, stigma, and delayed care later in life. This episode reframes women’s health as head-to-toe and deeply interconnected — where hormones affect sleep, mood, brain function, stress, and pelvic health — and why ignoring early signs doesn’t make them disappear, it simply pushes them further into the body.  CTA: If you grew up in the dark about your body — or you’re trying to raise children with more honesty, language, and confidence than you were given — this episode is for you. Listen, share it with someone who needs it, and help us break the cycle of silence around women’s health, one conversation at a time. Instagram: _rama.swami_ www.lakeviewphysio.ca www.healwithgrit.com Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 30m
  2. FEB 24

    EP.156 - Farida D - "Stop Letting The Bar End For Men, The Exact Point it Begins For Women"

    In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, I’m in conversation with Farida D, author of The Shit That Made Me a Feminist — a body of work that names the lived realities many women are taught to swallow quietly. Out of respect for her safety, this episode is audio-only.  Farida’s work — which centers women of color, power, rage, and structural inequality — does not allow her the privilege of visibility without risk. And yet, she has chosen not to stop. She continues to speak, write, and show up for women, even when doing so requires navigating the cost of being seen. This conversation moves through the “shit” that made feminism unavoidable — the moments where being grateful was expected instead of being honest, where motherhood shocked the system, where rage became information, and where the bar for men ended exactly where it began for women. We talk about: Why we are all born feminist, long before we have language for it How boys are given credit before they’re even born Why we do not choose our privileges or our oppressions The difference between having access to education but not access to safety Why this work is about structures, not individual people And why naming what’s happening is the first step to understanding it This episode is a reminder to trust your rage, "to feel the fire already inside you" There is space for all of us — but not without truth. IG: @farida.d.author 🎧 Audio-only episode Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 14m
  3. FEB 17

    EP.155 - Kam Bassier - "It Is A Priveledge To Be A Cycle Breaker"

    The one where we stop pretending everything’s fine just to keep the peace. In this episode, I sit down with Kam Bassier  (from Episode 136: “You’re Not Lazy, You’re Burnt Out”) to talk about a tension so many BIPOC adults are carrying right now: Why are we — the kids of immigrant parents, BIPOC millennials and Gen Z — having conversations our families never could? Why does naming pain feel like betrayal? And what does breaking cycles actually look like in real life? We talk about harmony culture in collectivist and immigrant families — where keeping the peace wasn’t about comfort, it was about survival and appearances.  But when harmony is prioritized over accountability, the emotional weight doesn’t disappear. It gets stored in our bodies and shows up later as burnout, people-pleasing, numbing, substance use, overworking, resentment, and silence in our marriages and parenting. This conversation isn’t about tearing our parents down. It’s about understanding what they couldn’t take responsibility for — so we don’t keep carrying it, and so we don’t pass it on to our kids. What we get into: Gratitude and grief can coexist — you can honor the sacrifices and name the emotional gaps Why “they did their best” often shuts down real healing How choosing peace over accountability trains us to minimize ourselves Why inner-child work isn’t cute — it’s necessary Rest, boundaries, and feeling all emotions (not just “happy”) as acts of resistance A raw moment about quitting weed — not because it’s bad, but because numbing became easier than feeling Not everyone in your family will be ready for this work — and that’s okay. You don’t need permission to heal. The work may feel lonely, but it’s how cycles end and new ones begin. One thing to take away: You can love your family deeply and still choose healing over fake harmony. The next generation is watching what we do with what we were handed. Instagram:  kambassier Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 29m
  4. FEB 10

    EP.154 - Moses Farrow - "The Human Trafficking Industry Uses Adoption As Propaganda"

    Taken from South Korea as a baby, removed from his culture, and told it’s for a “better life” that he "wasn't wanted".  This is the reality behind many international adoptions. In this episode, I speak with Moses, a therapist, advocate, and human being whose lived experience gives him a unique perspective on how 'adoption' functions as an industry of child trafficking. Through his work, he challenges the narratives that frame removal as rescue, and exposes how children are commodified, displaced, and erased for profit. We explore commodification: turning human beings, culture, and lived experience into something that can be bought, sold, or managed, stripping away history and rights. We also confront a common question: Isn’t it better to give an unwanted child a “good North American life”? Moses explains why this belief is a false narrative that assumes Western life is superior, erases the abuse many children experience, and leaves some struggling with trauma so severe that many have taken their own lives. This episode challenges the fantasy, the brainwashing, and the language that normalizes global-scale harm, asking listeners to see 'adoption' for what it often is: a system that commodifies children and erases their histories. Instagram: mosesafarrow societyforadoptiontruth.org thetruthguide.com Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 51m
  5. FEB 3

    EP.153 - Shawn Ahmed - "If It Makes Me Laugh, That's Good Enough"

    I came across Shawn Ahmed’s work the way so many of us do now — through a moment of laughter that quietly turned into curiosity. What followed was a conversation that went far deeper than comedy. Shawn is a South Asian Canadian actor with an impressive body of work across television, film, and comedy — and in this episode, we talk about what lives beneath the credits. Growing up in that in-between space — being Canadian while being raised by immigrant parents — and how that lived experience shapes creativity, confidence, and the risks we take. We explore what it means to choose a path that isn’t considered “safe,” how family support shows up in subtle ways, and what early auditions teach you about how the world sees you before you even speak. We also get into the tension many South Asian artists face: wanting the freedom to play roles not defined by race, while knowing that representation still matters — especially for the kids watching from the sidelines, wondering what’s possible for them. This conversation isn’t about arriving at neat answers. It’s about staying in relationship with yourself, trusting your voice, and giving yourself permission to want more — even when it doesn’t match the script you were handed. If you’ve ever felt caught between worlds, expectations, or versions of yourself — this one will land. Instagram: iamshawnahmed Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    53 min
  6. JAN 27

    EP.152 - Arunie Saldhi - "I'm Very Careful Now, To Not Breach My Own Boundaries"

    We’ve all been in rooms where the energy doesn’t match the claim of being a safe space -  overthinking, comparing, and surface-level talk are what tends to go down instead. I sat down with Arunie, Psychologist with PCHS Calgary and co-host of Brown Girl Problems, for a conversation that goes beyond surface-level chats. Arunie highlights the truth behind the pressure to turn trauma into currency, and what it takes to build connection and support beyond the surface. We explore what brown women are tired of carrying, what we’re quietly unlearning together, and how to show up for each other -  listening deeply, celebrating honestly, and supporting without competing, comparing, or explaining ourselves. Arunie 's MFU is a CTA in how we are showing up as a community.  Instagram: browngirlproblems.podcast Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 25m
  7. JAN 20

    EP.151 - Reshma Kearney - "It's In The Transitions That We're Able To Heal"

    Reshma Kearney returns to Middle Fingers Up following Episode 128, where she first shared her experience of losing her husband to suicide and raising three children through grief. In this conversation, we go deeper — into what grief looks like over time, how it lives in the body, and how it quietly shapes our mental health, parenting, and sense of self. We talk about grief as an ongoing relationship rather than something to “get over,” how Reshma’s trauma-informed yoga and mindfulness work has evolved, and what she’s learning as a mother raising one son and two daughters through loss. We explore gendered grief, breaking South Asian cultural silence, emotional safety for boys, and what it means to raise the next generation with more permission to feel. This episode is about breath, stillness, boundaries, and the courage to protect your peace — especially during transitions and the holidays. It’s about what grief takes, what it gives, and what we carry forward. Because grief isn’t linear — and healing doesn’t mean forgetting. Find Reshma on Instagram reshmakearney for more on her work and family updates. Short, practical reminder: grief is about what we carry forward as much as what we’ve lost. Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 18m
  8. JAN 13

    EP.150 - Rahell Seddek - "Whiteness Moves In A Funny Way"

    In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, we sit down with Rahell, a 23-year-old mixed-race individual navigating identity, privilege, and growth. Rahell shares his experience as a “passing white kid” unpacking whiteness — what it meant to belong in some spaces, and what it cost in others. He talks about how hip-hop shaped his understanding of culture, power, and resistance, and the ongoing work of unlearning misogyny with honesty and accountability. From childhood experiences in hockey and school that exposed racial divides, to reflections on survival, community-building, and responsibility in anti-racism work, this conversation explores the in-between spaces many mixed-race people live in. As Rahell says, “We are not math problems.” Identity isn’t something to calculate or explain away — it’s something lived. He challenges listeners to move beyond surface-level allyship and ask, “What do I actually want from societal change?” And for anyone listening who considers themselves aware, supportive, or “one of the good ones,” this episode quietly asks: If the people most impacted by your actions feel dismissed, exhausted, or blamed — is it possible your intention to help is getting in the way of your ability to listen? Whether you’re mixed-race, raising mixed kids, or reflecting on your own identity and blind spots, this episode offers an honest dialogue on healing and what it means to show up with integrity.  New episodes drop regularly—subscribe now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite platform! Instagram:  rahell_theg.o.a.t23 Support the show If you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" - It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted! Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to info@mfupodcast.com. Thank you for listening! In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

    1h 35m

About

Welcome to Middle Fingers Up, the show where we keep our heads high and our middle fingers higher. We explore relationships, mental health and everything in between. Join me, Kiran Randhawa on the journey to learn, grow and find our voice.