The Bad Cancer Diaries

J. Clark Allison

This is mostly the podcast version of The Bad Cancer Diaries Blog, but from from identical and diverging more and more. I read funny essays about cancer. The topic have been mainly about being diagnosed, treated, for pancreatic cancer while dodging medical errors in a dangerously dysfunctional system staffed with the smartest, most conscientious and compassionate people who've ever almost killed me. This podcast is marked explicit for the occasional swear word and talk of death and dying, which might be difficult for some people. You can read these stories, subscribe and more at: http://badcancer.blogspot.com badcancer.substack.com

Episodes

  1. Episode 12: Why Am I Not Surprised?

    06/07/2024

    Episode 12: Why Am I Not Surprised?

    In this episode I read a short post from TBCD substack I wrote in reaction to my last oncology appointment, when I found out the last CT scan showed the small nodes in my lungs had continued growing which was starting to look suspicious for metastasis and was disturbing enough, but my doctor’s strange reaction didn’t help—he was disappointed that I wasn’t more surprised. “I wish you were more surprised,” he said, leaving me once again to wonder WTF does that mean? Since then, I had a PET scan to detect active cancer, and that came back negative, so this was apparently a false alarm. Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    7 min

  2. 04/27/2024

    Episode 11: Please Don't Kill My Dog

    I read another fairly short essay from the Bad Cancer Diaries blog about the role my best friend has played in my life, both before and after my diagnosis, how we both nearly died within a couple of weeks, and of course, my cynical take on veterinary care and how it is and is not like human medical care. Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    14 min
  3. Episode 10: Please Don't Kill me

    01/16/2024

    Episode 10: Please Don't Kill me

    Systemic Medical Errors Are WAY More Common Than You Think In this episode I read another essay, first published on TBCD substack. The longer-than-usual intro includes a brief update on current events, including my latest CT scan results. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Pancreatic Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    20 min
  4. Episode 9: Whippled (the surgery)

    11/18/2023

    Episode 9: Whippled (the surgery)

    Reading of the essay titled “Whippled: Believe or Not, Sometimes You Just Have To Pray”, about my experience undergoing “the granddaddy of all surgeries”. And my week in the surgical ICU, aka hell, 🤕 originally published on my Substack of the same name. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    23 min
  5. Episode 8: Erica Lee - part one

    03/24/2023

    Episode 8: Erica Lee - part one

    This is my first attempt at having a guest. I was the one being interviewed by my good friend Erica Erica Lee. Unfortunately, due to a technical glitch (I forgot to plug in the audio interface and the battery went dead), the recording cut off at around 30 minutes. We kept talking for another hour or so but none of it was saved.  If it seems to end a little abruptly, that’s why. I'm calling this part one and will have Erica back soon to continue the conversation. Erica is an Ayurveda trained advanced yoga teacher working in the field of restorative justice, who always seemed wise beyond her years (I’m Gen X and she’s a Millennial)—or maybe I’m just immature, but I don’t think that’s it.  Our conversations always seem to go interesting places and I thought, even though her main connection to cancer is through me, it would make sense for us to record an episode together.  She's far less cynical than I am and reminds me that sometimes things do get get better when people care enough. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    31 min
  6. Episode 7: Missing In Action

    03/09/2023

    Episode 7: Missing In Action

    This is a short episode, an update really. I wasn't able to get anything out in February and thought I should explain why and assure everyone I'm okay and still working (a valid concern with a podcast like this one). I should have a regular episode out soon and with a guest no less. Aside: If you notice my voice sounds different, you're not wrong. This is what my voice is supposed to sound like. Much of the time since my diagnosis my voice had been weird - a little higher pitched and slightly hoarse. When I was so sick last month it was barely there at all and it was hard to hear me, which isn't the main reason I didn't podcast, but it would've been even if all else were fine. Right now it seems back to normal. Let's hope it stays that way. I have training and experience narrating audiobooks which might explain why I'm sensitive to differences, as they can be distracting to listeners. I don't know that anyone else even noticed. And no, I don't think I have another tumor in my throat, though it definitely crossed my mind. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    6 min
  7. Episode 6: Gratitude For Cancer

    02/02/2023

    Episode 6: Gratitude For Cancer

    In this episode, I read an essay from my blog called "Gratitude For Cancer," written just before Thanksgiving last year (2022), hence the theme. The title is a little tongue-in-cheek as it seems wrong to claim gratitude for having got pancreatic cancer. As I looked back, in the spirit of the season and because gratitude is its own reward, examining my experience for any bits of silver lining, I did find some.  The last part of the essay is about what actually happened on Thanks Giving Day. last year, for which I was not very grateful at all. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    13 min
  8. Episode 5: I May Just Be An A*****e

    01/24/2023

    Episode 5: I May Just Be An A*****e

    In this episode, I read another essay from the substack blog with the same name. It's a little lighter in tone than the last couple have been - very tongue-in-cheek. Hopefully, some humor comes through. I wrote this while my diagnosis was still pretty new. In hindsight, it's not surprising that I was having trouble keeping track of appointments, and not surprising that I might not have been as nice as I could've been. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Pancreatic Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    12 min
  9. Episode 4: Deep Cover

    01/20/2023

    Episode 4: Deep Cover

    In this episode, I am of course very cynical as talk a bit about chemotherapy drugs and conventional vs alternative cancer treatments and then I get quite existential, exploring some difficult questions around the end-of-life in what I hope is a pragmatic and not too depressing way. I don't consider this talk about suicide, but if that triggers you, consider yourself warned. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Pancreatic Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    14 min
  10. Episode 3: If a Radiology Report Falls In The Forest

    01/18/2023

    Episode 3: If a Radiology Report Falls In The Forest

    In this episode, I read another essay from the Bad Cancer Diaries blog. I originally wrote this back around August 2022, and I'm not sure how it comes across but I think my anger at the new diagnosis shows up as heavy sarcasm. I get a little in the weeds as far as medical jargon, but it's pretty short (12 minutes) and winds up with a nice rant so hopefully, it's entertaining and worth the listen. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Pancreatic Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    13 min
  11. Episode 2: Hypcritic Oath: Admit No Harm or I'm The Decider

    01/17/2023

    Episode 2: Hypcritic Oath: Admit No Harm or I'm The Decider

    The second installment of The Bad Cancer Diaries. Topics include chemotherapy, port-a-caths, stents, biopsies, endoscopic ultrasounds, gigantic EMTs, surgeons' personalities, and squashed uvulas. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    18 min
  12. Episode 1 (intro) My Cancer Trumps Your Dead Dog

    01/10/2023

    Episode 1 (intro) My Cancer Trumps Your Dead Dog

    This is the first episode of the Bad Cancer Diaries, a podcast by and for people who have or have survived cancer. To start with I, J. Clark, your host, will be sharing the public journal I started writing spontaneously last summer as I tried to adjust and deal with this grave new circumstance of my life.  This episode contains a short introduction to the podcast and myself as well as the first, pretty short piece of personal essay from The Bad Cancer Diaries. Later I expect to have show guests  - other cancer patients/survivors to share their stories and have a conversation. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badcancer/message Get full access to The Bad Cancer Diaries: A Cynic's Guide to Surviving Cancer at badcancer.substack.com/subscribe

    6 min
  • 12 Episodes

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

This is mostly the podcast version of The Bad Cancer Diaries Blog, but from from identical and diverging more and more. I read funny essays about cancer. The topic have been mainly about being diagnosed, treated, for pancreatic cancer while dodging medical errors in a dangerously dysfunctional system staffed with the smartest, most conscientious and compassionate people who've ever almost killed me. This podcast is marked explicit for the occasional swear word and talk of death and dying, which might be difficult for some people. You can read these stories, subscribe and more at: http://badcancer.blogspot.com badcancer.substack.com

Information

  • Creator
    J. Clark Allison
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2024
  • Episodes
    12
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © J Clark Allison
  • Show Website
    The Bad Cancer Diaries