The Open Bedroom Podcast

The Open Bedroom Podcast

Welcome to the world of open desire, honest conversations, and relationships designed on purpose. I’m Jennifer, a certified sex and relationship coach, and this podcast is a space for curious couples and throuples who want more—more connection, more pleasure, and more freedom to define love on their own terms. Here we explore open relationships, swinging, polyamory, and ethical non-monogamy with depth, nuance, and zero shame. We talk about navigating online dating in open relationships (yes, Tinder, Bumble, Feeld), creating customized relationship dynamics that actually work.

  1. EP#221: Fully Charged: Primal Sex with Melissa Louise

    1d ago

    EP#221: Fully Charged: Primal Sex with Melissa Louise

    In this episode of the Open Bedroom Podcast, I welcome back Melissa Louise, a certified erotic blueprint coach, to explore "fully charged primal sex." We dive into the biological and evolutionary roots of male and female sexuality, including why men are naturally silent during sex, how prolactin causes post-ejaculation sleepiness, and why women have greater orgasmic capacity. Melissa also explains sperm competition, menstrual health, and sexual transmutation techniques for men. She introduces her six-week program, Fully Charged, designed to help men build sexual stamina, emotional depth, and deeper partner connection. What is Primal Sex? (00:03:02) Melissa Louise defines primal sex, linking it to survival instincts, our subconscious brain, and deep, raw hunger and desire. Why Men are Silent During Sex (00:05:41) An evolutionary explanation for why men are naturally silent during sex to avoid predators and competition from other males. The Role of Prolactin in Men (00:09:07) Discussion on the hormone prolactin, which makes men sleepy after ejaculation to prevent conflict with subsequent partners for the woman. Female Vocalization and Orgasms (00:10:01) Women are wired to be vocal and have multiple orgasms to attract more partners during their short fertility window. The Egg Chooses the Sperm (00:15:34) Melissa explains that the egg selects the fittest sperm from multiple partners, challenging the idea of sperm choosing the egg. Societal Views on Multiple Partners (00:19:31) A discussion on modern cultural narratives around sexual ownership versus historical community-based lovemaking and the nature of jealousy. Why Women Need More Sex Than Men (00:24:00) Women have a higher orgasmic capacity than men, suggesting their biological need for sex is greater than culturally believed. The Impact of Modern Life on Women's Health (00:25:29) How modern stress and societal pressures negatively affect women's menstrual cycles and lead to a difficult menopause experience. The Power of the Menstrual Cycle (00:30:14) Exploring the spiritual and biological power of menstruation, including DMT release and its historical significance in tribal communities. The Female Orgasmic Experience (00:37:43) The hosts discuss the intense, high-like feeling women experience from multiple orgasms, which is linked to DMT release. How Men Can Have Non-Refractory Orgasms (00:40:37) Melissa reveals that men can experience continuous, non-refractory orgasms through prostate stimulation, similar to a woman's G-spot orgasm. Building a Man's Capacity for Pleasure (00:43:18) Men can be trained to hold more pleasure and separate orgasm from ejaculation, leading to better health and business success. Introduction to the "Fully Charged" Program (00:46:17) Melissa introduces her live training program for men, designed to teach them how to control ejaculation and enhance pleasure. What the "Fully Charged" Program Covers (00:55:29) A detailed breakdown of the six-week program, including practical techniques, shadow work, and learning about female arousal maps. Follow Melissa Louise: WEBSITE FULLY CHARGED SUbstack INstagram "The Seminal Spirits" are the fire sung by poets having been stolen from the gods by Prometheus. Pierre Louis Moreau The Earthly Venus. Semen is the most fined & noblest part of the whole human frame containing in itself the whole nature & complexion of every part of the body : or in other words, being the essence of man. Nicolas Venette 17th Century physician, sexologist & writer.

    1h 1m
  2. EP#219: Why Women Don't Want Nice Guys With Marni Kinrys

    Jun 17

    EP#219: Why Women Don't Want Nice Guys With Marni Kinrys

    Today I'm speaking with Marni Kinrys, founder of the Wing Girl Method, about why being a "nice guy" often kills attraction. Marni explains the crucial difference between being "nice" (passive, conflict-avoidant) and being a "good man" (confident, assertive, emotionally intelligent). We discuss how societal conditioning creates insecurity in men, how emotional disconnection kills desire in relationships, and how men can rebuild attraction through consistent support and playful flirtation. Marni also introduces her "F Formula" program, designed to help men develop authentic confidence and flirting skills. MARNI KINRYS is the founder of The Wing Girl Method, host of the Ask Women Podcast, designer of the F-Formula, and an award-winning female dating coach for men ages 25-85 at every stage of dating and relationships, who’s spent the last decade helping hundreds of thousands of men stop being Mr. Nice Guy and start being Mr. Holy Sh*t, I Want Him! With more than 50 digital programs, monthly online masterclasses, 150 million YouTube views and 1,300,000 subscribers to her channel, Marni Your Personal Wing Girl, Marni is known for her blunt, no “fluff” approach and honest insider tips, tools and advice on what women really want vs. what they say they want. The Difference Between "Nice" and "Good" (00:03:10) Marnie explains that "nice" often means boring and passive, while a "good" man is confident, assertive, and sexually expressive. The Origins of the "Nice Guy" (00:05:06) The discussion explores how early female influences, like mothers or teachers, and societal pressures can train men to be overly passive. Modern Pressures on Men (00:07:05) Marnie and Jen discuss how movements like #MeToo have created confusion for men, making them unsure how to act around women. The Importance of Emotional Intelligence (00:13:59) A man who can be masculine while also understanding communication and holding space for a woman's emotions is incredibly attractive. The "Soap" Argument: Understanding Triggers (00:19:53) Jen shares a story about an argument over soap, highlighting how small issues can trigger deeper feelings of inadequacy and mental load. How to See Beyond the Argument (00:25:44) Marnie explains how she coaches men to understand the real emotions behind a woman's complaints, like exhaustion or feeling overwhelmed. Revitalizing a Sexless Marriage (00:30:40) The conversation shifts to why wives lose sexual interest, linking it to feeling unheard, unseen, and unsupported by their partners. Baby Steps to Reconnection (00:33:50) Marnie offers practical, small steps for men to rebuild connection and trust, starting with consistent communication and taking on responsibilities. What Men Really Want (00:38:02) Men come to Marnie to learn how to attract women, which involves shedding the "nice guy" mask and becoming comfortable with themselves. Follow Marni: WingGirlMethod.com Facebook Instagram TikTok Twitter YouTube LinkedIn Follow The Open Bedroom Podcast: https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast/

    1h 22m
  3. EP#218: Why You’re Not Getting a 2nd Date

    Jun 9

    EP#218: Why You’re Not Getting a 2nd Date

    In this episode of the Open Bedroom Podcast, My husband Scott and I discuss why people often don't get a second date, identifying 5 problematic dater archetypes: Chatty Cathy, Negative Nancy, Pillow Princess, Boring Brenda, and Free Date Fran. Our central message is simple: show genuine curiosity about your date. We emphasize that mutual engagement, both conversationally and intimately, is essential for meaningful connection, and that self-awareness is key to improving your dating life. Why You're Not Getting a Second Date (00:01:16) Jen and Scott introduce the central theme: why people often don't get called back for a second date. The Self-Absorbed Dater (00:03:32) Scott shares a story about a woman from his past who talked endlessly about herself without ever asking about him. Giving Feedback to Bad Daters (00:09:30) The hosts discuss the dilemma of whether to give direct, compassionate feedback to people after a bad date. The Common Theme: Lack of Reciprocity (00:10:09) Scott describes the recurring pattern of dates who talk at them for hours without showing any curiosity about their lives. Frustration with Self-Centered Dates (00:14:25) Jen expresses her exhaustion and frustration with the consistent lack of reciprocal engagement from the people they date. Archetype 1: Chatty Cathy (00:17:33) Jen introduces the first archetype of a bad dater: the person who talks nonstop and never asks any questions. Archetype 2: Negative Nancy (00:18:07) The hosts discuss the second archetype, using a recent date who complained constantly and ran up a large bill. Archetype 3: The Pillow Princess (00:20:09) Jen describes a selfish sexual partner who expects to receive pleasure without reciprocating, tying it to the same problematic date. Archetype 4: Boring Brenda (00:26:34) The hosts discuss dates who are uninteresting, lack hobbies or identity, and have a flat, disengaged emotional affect. Reasons for Poor Dating Behavior (00:28:38) Scott explores potential reasons for these behaviors, such as self-absorption, nervousness, or a simple lack of conversational skills. The Importance of Meaningful Connection (00:30:31) Scott explains his approach to dating, which involves seeking genuine connection and understanding who a person truly is. Asking Deeper Questions (00:34:16) The hosts share insightful questions they ask on dates to encourage deeper conversation and reveal a person's character. Becoming an Interesting Person (00:39:08) Jen advises listeners who might be "boring" to develop hobbies and interests before re-entering the dating scene. Aligning Your Profile with Your Goals (00:41:29) The hosts discuss the importance of ensuring your dating profile accurately reflects what you are actually looking for in a partner. Archetype 5: Free Date Franny (00:48:19) Jen introduces the final archetype: the person who seems to only want a free meal or night out. Final Thoughts on Self-Awareness (00:51:10) Scott concludes that having self-awareness and showing genuine curiosity in others is crucial for successful and fulfilling dating experiences. Follow The Open Bedroom Podcast: https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast/

    54 min
  4. EP#217: The Truth About Premature Ejaculation with Jeff Abrahams of Promescent

    May 12

    EP#217: The Truth About Premature Ejaculation with Jeff Abrahams of Promescent

    Today I'm sit down with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, a sexual wellness brand. Jeff shares how Prometheus developed their patented delay sprays and wipes to help men with premature ejaculation by reducing hypersensitivity—without numbing their partners. We dive into the "orgasm gap" between men and women, the importance of foreplay and communication, and why normalizing masturbation for men matters. Jeff also talks about female arousal gels, c**k rings, and their Go Solo lotion. Throughout the episode, we focus on removing shame around sexual wellness and encourage couples to explore intimacy openly using the right tools. Unrealistic Expectations from Porn (00:00:01) Discusses how porn creates anxiety and unrealistic expectations about sex and performance. Origins of Promescent and PE Treatments (00:01:51) Jeff explains the founding of Promescent, early PE treatments, and the science behind their delay spray. How the Delay Spray Works (00:04:05) Details on the lidocaine-based spray, its unique formulation, and how it avoids numbing partners. The Orgasm Gap and Coping Mechanisms (00:06:14) Discusses the average duration of intercourse for men and women, the orgasm gap, and coping strategies. PE’s Prevalence and Misdiagnosis (00:08:42) PE is more common than ED; misdiagnosis and psychological impacts are discussed. Anxiety, Confidence, and Sexual Performance (00:09:57) Explores the link between anxiety, confidence, and sexual performance in men. Impact of Porn on Sexual Expectations (00:13:38) How porn distorts expectations and increases anxiety for both men and women. Communication and Learning Your Partner (00:22:24) Importance of communication, understanding partner preferences, and overcoming shame in sexual relationships. Sex Education and Breaking Stereotypes (00:29:53) Lack of proper sex education, breaking myths about orgasms, and understanding female anatomy. Stigma and Physiology of Premature Ejaculation (00:56:48) Addressing stigma, physiological causes of PE, and the need for open discussion and solutions. Shop Promescent: https://www.promescent.com/ Follow The Open Bedroom Podcast: https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast/

    1h 10m
  5. EP#216: Sensitive is Sexy, Nervous System Regulation for Intimacy with Rachel Dorneanu

    May 5

    EP#216: Sensitive is Sexy, Nervous System Regulation for Intimacy with Rachel Dorneanu

    In this episode of the Open Bedroom Podcast, I sit down with licensed therapist and certified sex therapist Rachel Dorneanu to talk about what it means to be a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) and how it impacts intimacy. Rachel walks me through the DOES framework (Depth of processing, Overstimulation, Empathy, Strong emotional responses) and we explore how HSP traits can both enhance and complicate sexual experiences. We dive into nervous system regulation techniques—like breathing exercises, somatic tools, and mindful practices—to help you (and me!) find our "window of tolerance" for pleasurable, sustainable intimacy. Rachel also shares practical communication strategies that I can use to navigate sensitivity differences with my partner. Vibrator Sensations (00:00:01) Jen and Rachel discuss different types of vibrator sensations, from "buzzy" to "deep and thrumming," and personal preferences. Podcast Introduction (00:00:34) Jen introduces the podcast, herself as the host, and today's guest, Rachel Dorneanu a licensed therapist. Introducing Rachel (00:01:09) A detailed introduction of Rachel, her credentials, specializations, and personal interests outside of her professional life. Topic Intro: Sensitive is Sexy (00:02:10) Jen introduces the episode's topic and shares her personal experiences with increasing sensitivity as she gets older. What is a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)? (00:03:03) Rachel defines what a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) is, mentioning it affects about 20% of the population. The "DOES" Acronym for HSP (00:04:10) Rachel explains the HSP acronym DOES: Depth of processing, Overstimulation, Empathy, and Sensitivity to stimuli, relating it to intimacy. HSP and Sex Toys (00:06:18) The discussion turns to how being an HSP can affect the experience with sex toys, like needing lower vibration levels. How Do You Know if You're HSP? (00:08:30) Jen questions how to identify as an HSP and contrasts it with how a "normal" person might experience the world. Training Yourself to Be More Sensitive (00:11:26) Rachel offers advice for people who feel desensitized and want to experience more sensitivity, suggesting mindfulness and breathing exercises. Exposure Hierarchy Explained (00:13:23) Rachel explains the therapeutic concept of an exposure hierarchy to gradually build tolerance and sensitivity in a sexual context. Follow Rachel: https://blinq.me/SbViZhQWbeXo Follow The Open Bedroom Podcast: https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast/

    52 min
  6. EP#215: When the Match Doesn’t Match Your True Desires

    Mar 10

    EP#215: When the Match Doesn’t Match Your True Desires

    In this episode of The Open Bedroom Podcast, I sit down with my husband Scott as we reflect on his recent breakup with a woman we’d been dating. We get real about the importance of relationship alignment, the challenges that come up when expectations around exclusivity and autonomy don’t quite match, and how easy it is to overlook red flags when there’s strong chemistry. Sharing from our own experience, we talk about why honest communication matters, how being clear about what we want can make all the difference, and the importance of choosing partners whose relationship goals truly line up with ours. Whether you’re exploring modern, non-traditional relationship dynamics or just curious, we hope our conversation offers some thoughtful insights and support along the way. When the Match Doesn’t Match (00:05:27) Diving into why the recent relationship didn’t work, starting from dating profiles to real-life misalignment. Misalignment in Relationship Goals (00:07:56) Clarifying the disconnect in what each party wanted—deep connection vs. friends with benefits—and how this was communicated. Overlooking Red Flags Due to Chemistry (00:08:49) How strong chemistry and communication led both sides to ignore fundamental misalignments. Challenges of Standing Firm in Desires (00:10:09) The difficulty of holding to one’s relationship needs when someone seems to check almost every box. Intellectual vs. Political Alignment (00:10:34) Discussing how intellectual connection was strong, but political and worldview differences existed. Navigating Political Differences in Dating (00:12:18) Jen reflects on dating app experiences and how political alignment is often a barrier, but can also be a source of connection. Red Flags vs. Misalignment (00:16:33) Exploring the difference between true red flags and simple misalignment in relationship goals. Ignoring Red Flags and Its Consequences (00:18:18) Why people ignore red flags, and the pain caused by trying to force a relationship despite clear misalignments. Autonomy vs. Security in Relationships (00:20:10) Scott and Jen discuss the struggle between wanting autonomy and the desire for security and exclusivity. Believing People When They Show You Who They Are (00:23:09) Learning to accept people’s stated boundaries and not trying to change them; importance of alignment. Lessons Learned and Moving Forward (00:24:10) Jen shares takeaways: only date aligned people and avoid those who put up emotional walls. Confusion When Words and Actions Differ (00:25:03) How mixed signals—saying one thing but acting another—create confusion and hope for change. Reflecting on Past Relationship Dynamics (00:27:17) Jen wonders if things would have changed if they hadn’t pushed for exclusivity, drawing parallels to her own past. Choosing Each Other and Responsibility (00:29:01) Scott discusses the responsibility and effort involved when someone chooses exclusivity and prioritizes the relationship. Scott’s Capacity for Multiple Relationships (00:33:06) Jen praises Scott’s ability to meet the needs of multiple partners and reflects on what they seek in future partners. Tailoring Relationship Dynamics to Your Needs (00:35:30) Advice to listeners: seek partners who want the same dynamic as you, whether it’s polyamory, swinging, or exclusivity. Envisioning the Future and Alignment (00:36:34) Realizing misalignment when future visions don’t include each other; importance of shared goals. Honesty About Needs and Desires (00:37:43) Emphasizing the need for self-honesty and seeking partners who are open to building what you want. Podcast Closing (00:39:15) Thanking listeners, encouraging feedback, and inviting them to subscribe and share the podcast. Follow The Open Bedroom podcast: https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast

    40 min
  7. EP#214: Things Your Momma Never Told You About Your Vagina with Heather Florio

    Mar 3

    EP#214: Things Your Momma Never Told You About Your Vagina with Heather Florio

    Hey, it’s Jen, and this episode of The Open Bedroom Podcast is all about the things your momma probably never mentioned about your vagina (and trust me, you’ll want to hear this!). I’m joined by Heather Florio, the fabulous CEO of Desert Harvest, and together we’re busting myths, spilling secrets, and getting real about women’s pelvic and vaginal health.We kick things off by debunking some classic myths—like whether you really need to do Kegels all day, every day (spoiler: not everyone should!), and why those “freshness” products in the drugstore might be doing more harm than good. Heather dives into the science behind vaginal health, explaining why pH-balanced and iso-osmolar products are your best friends, especially when it comes to lubricants and moisturizers.We get into the nitty-gritty about hormone changes during perimenopause and menopause, and why supporting your body through these transitions is so important. Heather also drops some truth bombs about why you should steer clear of douches and coconut oil (yep, even if your favorite influencer swears by it), and why aloe-based moisturizers might just be the unsung heroes of vaginal care.This episode is packed with practical tips for keeping your pelvic health in check, and we’re all about empowering you to ask questions, have open conversations, and demand evidence-based care. So grab your headphones and get ready to learn what your momma didn’t tell you—but definitely should have!Follow Heather:https://desertharvest.com/Follow The Open Bedroom Podcast:https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast

    47 min

About

Welcome to the world of open desire, honest conversations, and relationships designed on purpose. I’m Jennifer, a certified sex and relationship coach, and this podcast is a space for curious couples and throuples who want more—more connection, more pleasure, and more freedom to define love on their own terms. Here we explore open relationships, swinging, polyamory, and ethical non-monogamy with depth, nuance, and zero shame. We talk about navigating online dating in open relationships (yes, Tinder, Bumble, Feeld), creating customized relationship dynamics that actually work.

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