Durable Dad with Tommy Geary

Tommy Geary
  • 5.0 (33)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

The Durable Dad podcast gives men the skills and tools they need to be rock solid for their family, their work and their community.

  1. 1D AGO

    113: Building Steady Confidence With Stoic Integrity

    What does it actually mean to live a virtuous life? Not theory or philosophy quotes on Instagram, but in real life. In this episode, we break down the Stoic principle of virtue and how it applies to your training, your leadership, your marriage, and your fatherhood. Stoic philosophy isn’t abstract—it’s practical. It’s about building self-discipline, emotional control, courage, and patience in normal, everyday moments. Most high-achieving men have the ambition, but struggle with consistency. Dialed in for a week. Then off track. Calm at work. Reactive at home. Focused in the gym. Scrolling at night. That swing kills confidence. Stoic integrity is different. It’s steady. It’s proving who you are through daily behavior. Highlights: Why men live on emotional highs and lows—and how that erodes self-trustThe difference between short bursts of intensity and long-term integrityHow consistency (like quitting alcohol for 18 months) builds real confidenceThe four Stoic virtues—courage, discipline, justice, patience—and how they show up in modern lifeWhy missing once is normal, but repeating the miss creates driftHow quick recovery strengthens characterPractical Takeaways: Choose one area where your behavior doesn’t match the man you want to be—fitness, leadership, marriage, fatherhood.Identify the virtue required (courage, discipline, patience, self-awareness). Practice that trait deliberately.When you slip, recover fast. Don’t spiral. Prove it again the next day.Marcus Aurelius wrote, “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” Stoic integrity isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being consistent. When your actions match your standards, you build a steady confidence your family can feel.

    14 min

  2. FEB 10

    112: Stop Making Conflict Worse in Your Marriage

    Most men think conflict is the problem. It’s not. The real damage happens in how we avoid it, rush through it, or let it spiral when emotions spike. This episode breaks down why difficult conversations with your wife feel so charged—and how learning to manage yourself in those moments changes everything. Conflict isn’t something to eliminate. It’s where trust gets built when you handle it well. Highlights Why avoiding hard conversations only makes them heavier laterThe three ways men typically mishandle conflict: avoidance, escape, escalationThe relationship cycle every marriage runs through—whether you like it or notHow being “right” kills repair and connectionThe green / blue / red zones and what happens when you leave centerWhy trying to fix her emotions backfiresA simple listening tool that stops arguments from spinningPractical takeaways Notice when you’re triggered and pause before engagingStay emotionally centered so you can actually hear herFocus on repair, not winning or ending the conversation fastConflict is unavoidable. Repair is a skill. Listen in, then pay attention to the next hard conversation you want to avoid—and do it differently.

    16 min

  3. JAN 27

    111: Schedule Your Future

    Your calendar already tells the truth about your priorities.  This episode is about using that truth to shape the year ahead—on purpose. Most men stop at reflection. They do a year-end review, get clear on what mattered, and feel good about the insight. Then nothing changes. In this short follow-up, Tommy breaks down the missing step: deciding the next action and putting it on the calendar so it actually happens. In this episode: Why insight without action quietly keeps you stuckThe difference between wanting change and planning for itHow one calendar entry can shift your relationships, business, or healthReal examples: brothers’ trips, client strategy, training plans, and family timeWhy discomfort is often the signal you’re doing the right thingPractical takeaways: Choose one insight from your year-end review and name the very next actionAssign that action a specific date and timeLet your calendar reflect what matters to you—not just what’s demanded of youLook at your calendar for the year ahead. If it doesn’t show what you say is important, change it. That’s how different years are built. For high-achieving men, effort is rarely the issue. Most are working hard, carrying responsibility at work and at home, and trying to show up well. The problem is alignment. Without clear planning, even disciplined men end up reacting to their weeks instead of directing them. This episode of The Durable Dad Podcast focuses on calendar-based planning as a practical leadership skill.

    9 min

  4. JAN 13

    110: Drop the Pressure in 2026

    If you don’t pause to review your year, you don’t actually start a new one—you just drag old pressure forward. You already review your business. Numbers. Calendars. What worked and what didn’t.  This episode shows you how to apply that same discipline to your life—so your time, energy, and attention are spent where they matter most.  In this episode, we cover:  Why skipping a personal review causes you to repeat the same patterns How pressure-based goals quietly drain energy and motivation Using photos as data to reconnect with what actually mattered last year What your calendar reveals about stress, relationships, and priorities A four-step year-end review you can complete in one sitting How reflection creates vision—and why vision changes how you show up at home  Practical takeaways:  Block two uninterrupted hours and treat your life like you treat your businessUse photos and calendar entries as information, not nostalgia Set goals from clarity and appreciation, not urgency or scarcity If you want 2026 to feel different, you have to look back before you move forward. Drop the pressure. Get clear. Then lead your year on purpose. DOWNLOAD THE FREE YEAR END REVIEW - drop your email and get the step by step process I've used to optimize my life.  This episode is especially relevant for men focused on leadership—at work, at home, and in their community. Strong men’s leadership isn’t about doing more or pushing harder. It’s about clarity, self-awareness, and making intentional decisions with your time and energy.  When a man leads himself well, he leads his family better and shows up with steadiness at work. The year-end review process shared here helps men step out of reactive leadership and into grounded, intentional leadership.  It’s a practical tool for fathers, husbands, and high-performing professionals who want to reduce stress, strengthen their marriage, and model healthy leadership for their kids. Leadership starts with reflection—and this is where it begins.

    16 min

  5. 12/16/2025

    109: Escape Exhaustion: Why Nonstop Action Is Unsustainable

    Nonstop action has rewarded you for years—but it’s quietly draining the energy that makes you effective at work and present at home. Constant motion eventually backfires. Highlights Why pride in exhaustion is costing you patience, clarity, and connectionThe three stories men tell themselves to avoid slowing downWhy scrolling and “checking out” isn’t real recoveryWhy recharging is a leadership move, not a personal indulgenceStop calling exhaustion commitment—it’s usually mismanagement Before the holidays get louder, decide where you’ll refuel on purpose. A rested man leads better, loves better, and works better.

    17 min

  6. 12/01/2025

    108: Unfamiliar Territory

    Most men say they want growth, but avoid the unfamiliar territory where it actually happens. Highlights: • Why comfort pulls high-achieving men into quiet ruts. • The link between physical challenge and feeling alive again. • The Rim to River adventure. • What happens when you train for something that scares you a little. • How unfamiliar experiences reset your mindset more than any routine tweak. Takeaways: • Schedule something on your calendar that requires preparation. • When discomfort shows up, name it as unfamiliar—not wrong. • Use challenge to create energy for work, marriage, and fatherhood. Guest: Craig Speer—men’s health coach helping guys over 40 get strong, lean, and capable.

    24 min

  7. 11/18/2025

    107: A Tool to Make Better Decisions

    Most men make decisions out of convenience or pressure—and end up with regret or resentment. Highlights: • The difference between working in your life versus working on it • Why most men lose purpose—and drift into distraction • How a North Star makes big decisions easier • The three questions to define your North Star: values, impact, and energizers • How a simple North Star gives you clarity when tough choices show up • Why alignment—not hustle—creates steadiness at home • A client story using his North Star to pass on a tempting opportunity Takeaways: • Block real “strategy time” for your life the same way you do for work • Build your filter before the big decisions show up • Check your week: Did your actions match the man you say you want to be? Listen to the episode, then take a morning to define your North Star. Your kids and your wife will feel the difference when your decisions start lining up with who you want to be.

    14 min

  8. 11/04/2025

    106: Anger Isn’t the Problem

    It’s not the outburst that matters—it’s what’s driving it. Highlights: • The text from Tommy’s mom that exposed how quickly frustration can surface • Why anger is a part of you—not all of you • How Internal Family Systems (IFS) helps men understand their reactions • What anger is really after • The link between frustration and how we parent • What changes when you pause and get curious about your reaction • Simple ways to quiet your “angry part” before it takes the wheel Takeaways: Stop trying to suppress anger—start understanding it.You are not your anger.The calmer you are inside, the calmer your world feels outside.Tommy references Dr. Richard Schwartz’s No Bad Parts and walks through how “parts work” reshaped his relationship with his mom, his wife, and himself. If you want to understand your own anger and lead from calm, schedule a 50-minute strategy session at DurableDad.com. We’ll talk through where that part shows up and how to get back to steady ground.

    12 min
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5
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About

The Durable Dad podcast gives men the skills and tools they need to be rock solid for their family, their work and their community.

Information

  • Creator
    Tommy Geary
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    114
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Durable Dad with Tommy Geary
  • Show Website
    Durable Dad with Tommy Geary