The Ascertainers

The Ascertainers
  • 5.0 (6)
  • MUSIC COMMENTARY
  • UPDATED BIWEEKLY

Music Musings & Other Drivel

  1. 5D AGO

    Episode 147: Mark's Wine Faux Pas

    Send a text ....Eventually. Fun little episode featuring death, social blunders, wieners and curling.  Tell your friends! The dark days of Bugs BunnyNewt's--Tell 'em we sent youStraight MarkTV For DogsMark's awesome white wine storyRIP Catherine O'HaraRIP Chuck Negron How Three Dog Night was namedSome actual music talk (I know, right?)Geography for 200, AlexWiener talkOlympic curling previewSongs of the Week:Death May Be Your Santa Claus--Mott the HoopleSausalito Summernight--Diesel#NewtsAppleValleyMN #TV4DMN TheAscertainers@gmail.com Death May Be Your Santa Claus Diesel - Sausalito Summernight (1980) lyrics Take Off

    38 min

  2. FEB 6

    Episode 146: Back-to-Back Song Pairs

    Send us a text Nice little episode.  A few laughs, very little negativity and a tasteful amount of nudity. BeadsTwo dogsNewt's--Sports bar without all the bro's30 gallonsChill outRIP Pat's DadLoyal listener roll callGilligan's IslandWerner KlempererAunt Jemima Back-to-Back SongsWe Will Rock You/We are the Champions--QueenThis Beat Goes On/Switchin' to Glide--The KingsFeeling That Way/Anytime--JourneyNeal Schoen fantasy sequenceTainted Love/Where Did Our Love Go--Soft CellThe Load Out / Stay--Jackson BrowneBrain Damage / Eclipse--Pink FloydNeed You Tonight / Mediate--INXSThreshold / Jet Airliner--Steve Miller BandHeartbreaker / Livin' Lovin' Maid--Led Zeppelin#NewtsAppleValleyMN #PhoneAFriend TheAscertainers@gmail.com The Kings - This Beat Goes On/Switchin' to Glide Jackson Browne The Load Out and Stay Live BBC 1978

    37 min

  3. JAN 30

    Episode 145: Social Rant / American Guitarists

    Send us a text A slight departure to start this one.  Things are getting a bit tense for us, and we address how we deal with it.  As an important piece of context, this was recorded the night before the shooting of Alex Pretti in Minneapolis.  The rant is not related to that incident.   The episode gets a lot happier as we turn to a very incomplete list of American guitarists that we like. Newt's--Still Crazy After all These Years!NOVAMemory LaneJim goes off on the current way we're treating each otherCan't we all just get along??Appreciate (not attack) our differencesSongs of the Week:For What It's Worth -- Buffalo SpringfieldLife Without You--Stevie Ray VaughanA VERY INCOMPLETE list of American guitarists we like:Terry Kath, Jerry Garcia, SRV, Jimi Hendrix, BB King, Chuck Berry, Duane Allman, Prince, Neil Schoen, Spider Giraldo, Randy Rhodes, SlashAaand we're back to being happy.  Thanks for your understanding!#NewtsAppleValleyYourNumberOneSpotForIceColdBeerHotJuicyBurgersAnd OutstandingServiceDidWeMentionItsInAppleValleyMinnesotaNotCalifornia TheAscertainers@gmail.com Buffalo Springfield - For What It's Worth 1967 Stevie Ray Vaughan - Life Without You | Live at Capitol Theatre (1985)  If you just want to hear some epic advice on treating people go to the 6:00 mark

    39 min

  4. JAN 23

    Episode 144: Mark's College Roommate--Tommy

    Send us a text Just for fun, Mark invites his college roommate Tommy to join.  That's a bold move, but it wasn't as incriminating as Jim hoped.  Also, Bob Weir of the Grateful Dead died this week (which explains the amount of talk surrounding him). The origin story--bodily fluids have entered the chatJust outside San AntonioMark's cardiganFirst Grateful Dead showBootlegsThank you for your serviceEnid, OK and the patch controversyMore Dick's PicksThe DoorsDead & CompanyBob Weir rememberedThe 1980 MGBThe stolen Harley and the Pee Wee Herman bike lockBoxing & the cracked ribSongs of the WeekWhen I Paint My Masterpiece--Grateful DeadSugar Magnolia--Grateful DeadAlthea--Bob Weir and John MayerAdios Amigos#NewtsAppleValley #JustOutsideOfSanAntonio #ThatsALotOfJohnMayerLinks #RIPBob TheAscertainers@gmail.com Grateful Dead - When I Paint My Masterpiece - 7/26/1987 - Anaheim Stadium (Official) The Grateful Dead - Sugar Magnolia - Live '74 The Late Late Show Bob Weir and John Mayer Perform Althea John Mayer Eulogy for Bob Weir 💀⚡️🌹🙏🏾 John Mayer on Quitting Alchohol

    46 min

  5. JAN 16

    Episode 143: The Future is Now

    Send us a text Kind of a meandering conversation.  In Jim's opinion, it's some of our best work.  And he doesn't even like this podcast. Powered by Newt's (Apple Valley, MN)Potatoes / KetchupDemographicsCosby (sorry)TimberlakeJessica Beil (what is this--TMZ?)We are in the futureTwo man dead poolSongs of the WeekThe Time of the Preacher--Willie NelsonShining Star--Jerry Garcia BandGingerbread HousesJeff's ballsSpice journeySloppy JoesUsed car bluesDon't judge a book by its cover#NewtsAppleValleyMN TheAscertainers@gmail.com Willie Nelson - Time of the Preacher (Live From Austin City Limits, 1976) Shining Star (2 cam) - Jerry Garcia Band - 11-9-1991 Hampton, Va. set2-02 (LoloYodel)

    40 min

  6. JAN 9

    Episode 142: What is KPOP Anyway?

    Send us a text This episode has something for everyone.  Philippines history, boxing, burps and one old guy explaining KPOP to another old guy.  Oh, and we're giving away 3 Ascertainers T-shirts!  The PhilippinesThe Ascertainer's Newt's Nachos Challenge (not in any way affiliated with Newt's)Jim time traveledMark could've been a contenderThai Curry--can't even hit a 3 pointerBurp talkRIP Dick EnricoSongs of the Weak:Shine For You--Slightly Stoopid with G Love (really)Sharks--MorphineWild KingdomWord PoliceSnoop DoggKPOPShirt Giveaway!#NewtsAppleValley Want a free Ascertainers t-shirt?  TheAscertainers@gmail.com Shine For You (Official Music Video) - Slightly Stoopid with G. Love Morphine - Sharks (live, 1994)

    36 min

  7. JAN 3

    Episode 141: Happy New Year

    Send us a text This one was recorded before Christmas, so any current events won't be covered--which helps the episode.  Also, this is the second episode of the night, so if you detect a slight slurring, there's no need to adjust your settings... Stevie Ray Vaughn and Christopher Cross Connection Dog days of winterLatitude vs longitude lesson (who says this episode isn't cool)S.A.D. talkHat tip to So I Married an Axe MurdererWho's ready for the Newt's Apple Valley--Ascertainers BowlIron MarkIs that a pickle?Spirit MountainDon't ski high, kidsSongs of the weekCrazy Little Thing Called Love--QueenRelax--Frankie goes to HollywoodMcDonald's and Arby'sExposing the CalzoneNewt's cares--so go there and eat somethingCoors Light doesn't get you drunkProgressive DinnerHappy New Year!#NewtsAppleValley The wrong emPHASis on the wrong sylLABle Move your giant head - So I married an axe murderer Queen - Crazy Little Thing Called Love (Official Video) Frankie Goes To Hollywood - Relax (Official Video) Nobody EVER emails us, but just in case this is the week--TheAscertainers@gmail.com

    37 min

  8. 12/26/2025

    Episode 140: Glandman

    Send us a text Somehow, we've made 140 of these--very hard to believe.  The over/under number from Vegas was 3.5, so we have technically overachieved.  With that said, this episode covers a lot of ground and while potentially entertaining, won't make you a better person. Brown Sugar--just how?Newt's-- you go there and eat good foodMom updatesFrom genius to idiot to back to geniusTough week in the newsRob ReinerJake Paul distractionAwardsThe retirement party gang didn't come throughSusan Anton--for no good reasonTop 40 debateGlandmanGreg and Mark M--future guestsSongs of the WeekFat Old Son--Pink FloydSad Burlesque--The Scarlet GoodbyeSoul AsylumRock 'em Sock 'em RobotsIt's fluidChantz calloutFriendly Newt's reminder#NewtsAppleValleyMN The Ascertainers@gmail.com Witch Doctor - Ooh Eeh Ooh Ah Aah Ting Tang Walla Walla Bing Spinal Tap -- "shit sandwich" Kids In The Hall - Daddy Drank David Gilmour - Fat Old Sun Live in Gdansk - YouTube Sad Burlesque

    36 min
See All (147)

5
out of 5
6 Ratings

About

Music Musings & Other Drivel

Information

  • Creator
    The Ascertainers
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    147
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Ascertainers
  • Show Website
    The Ascertainers