NLP UK Training Podcast

Quality Culture

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Ever feel like you've got the ambition but something keeps getting in the way? Welcome to the NLP UK Training Podcast, hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser. Each episode is a short, honest conversation about the tools, mindsets and principles that help people get out of their own way - from practical NLP techniques to the Three Principles. Real stories, real experience, no jargon.

Aug 3

Not Bad With Money - Just Running an Old Program

“You only see what you believe.” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali ask a question that reframes the whole conversation about personal finance: what if you’re not bad with money – what if you’re just running an outdated program about it? They call it your script: the model of the world you absorbed long before you had any say in it, built from overheard kitchen-table conversations and offhand remarks from people who loved you. Steve opens with a story that lands hard: a delegate on a Leeds practitioner course who’d co-written a number one hit – earning several times an average annual salary in one go – and never wrote another. Later that week he mentioned, almost in passing, a core belief that money was a bad thing, inherited from his grandmother. Steve has wondered ever since whether that quiet sentence was what stood between him and a second hit. Kali’s version is closer to home: an eleven-year-old overhearing her mum worry about the electricity bill, and grandparents born in the early 1900s for whom scarcity wasn’t a mindset — it was two world wars, the Depression and rationing. The belief was accurate, once. It just kept travelling down the generations after the conditions changed. Then it gets practical: why new coaches price themselves at bargain-basement rates out of imagined scarcity (and the networking meetings full of coaches discussing the lack of demand – a room of people who by definition aren’t busy). Kali shares the reframe that got her onto Master Practitioner when the price made her wince: swap “can I afford it?” for “how can I afford it – and what will it cost me if I don’t?” £500 of coaching work a month later, the course paid for itself. And they close with the habit that keeps recurring on this show: when someone else does well, say good for them – and mean it. Your unconscious mind is always listening, and every put-down teaches it that money is bad. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: The songwriter with a number one hit and an inherited belief that money was badWhere money scripts come from – and why your grandparents’ scarcity was realWhy new coaches underprice themselves, and what to do insteadThe reframe: “how can I afford it – and what will it cost me if I don’t?”Paul McKenna’s rule on praising other people’s success (it’s really for you)Michael Neill on quoting from scarcity, and Rich Dad, Poor Dad on spending with purpose
Jul 20

Look, Listen, Feel: Why Your Message Isn't Landing (and How to Fix It)

“You’re respecting my model of the world by talking back in my language.” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali share one of the most immediately useful ideas in NLP: we all take in the world through our senses, but we don’t weigh them equally. Some people are predominantly visual (show me), some auditory (talk it through with me), some kinesthetic (let me get a feel for it), and some auditory-digital (give me the data, the criteria, the deal). Most of us are a blend with one or two dominant – and once you can spot which one someone’s running, you can speak their language and the message actually lands. The tell is in the words people use: look and see; I hear you and that rings a bell; it just felt right; it makes sense and meets my criteria. The standout story is the salesperson at Ricoh who realised mid-training that he was deeply kinesthetic and had been selling photocopiers the only way he knew how: let the customer have a go, have a play. Which worked brilliantly – on the other kinesthetics. He’d been quietly missing every visual buyer who wanted to see the print quality, and every auditory-digital buyer who wanted the price, the monthly payments and the network specs. As he put it himself, he’d been missing out on a big chunk of his potential customers without ever knowing why. Kali brings it home with her kitchen renovation – functionality and storage criteria first (that’s her AD), then hands run over every worktop and door in the showroom, handles ruled out entirely because of how they feel (pure kinesthetic), while visual Matt picked the colours and style. The upshot for anything you’re communicating, from a sales pitch to a website: build in enough of all four channels, and let people connect with the one that speaks to them. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: The four representational systems – visual, auditory, kinesthetic and auditory-digitalHow to spot someone’s preference from the words they use (and their eye movements)The Ricoh salesperson unknowingly selling to only a quarter of his marketKali’s kitchen: criteria plus touch, a blend in actionWhy good websites deliberately serve all four channelsSteve’s book on eye movements and language patterns – on the website and Amazon
Jul 6

Settling the Snow Globe: How to Quieten a Busy Mind

“I’m not going to do anything. I’m just going to let it settle.” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali take on the modern default state: a mind that never stops. Busy at work, busy at home, and busiest of all in your own head. Their central image is the snow globe – shake it and everything swirls, obscuring the figures inside. Put it down and it settles on its own. No effort required. Steve pairs it with the puddle in your wellies: stomp through and the sediment clouds everything; wait, and it clears itself. Both point at the same truth – the mind is a self-correcting system, and the problem is usually that we keep interrupting the self-correction. The practical heart of the episode is what each of them actually does about it. Steve shares the windscreen-wiper technique he absorbed from a Master Practitioner delegate’s modelling project – a coach who, on the drive to every session, imagined his wipers sweeping his mind clear – which now runs automatically whenever he needs to simply sit and listen. Kali’s version comes from her partner Matt, an IT security manager whose answer to every technical problem is “have you switched it off and on again?” – and it turns out it works on people too. Stuck writing a training programme? Ten minutes of watering the plants, and the way forward is suddenly obvious. There’s a sharper edge too: a busy mind makes real listening impossible – you’re not hearing the other person, you’re waiting for your turn with the question you’ve already lined up. And from the Three Principles angle, the snow-globe state is the ego trying to manage everything, while the quiet state is where insight actually arrives. If your head has been loud lately, this is a short, warm reminder that you don’t have to do anything to fix it. Pause. Stop shaking. Let it settle. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: The snow globe and the puddle: two metaphors for a mind in overdriveSteve’s windscreen wiper technique, borrowed from a modelled coachKali’s “switch it off and on again” approach to creative blocksWhy a busy mind means you’re listening to interrupt, not to understandThe Three Principles view: ego shakes the globe, quiet delivers the insightThe case for caring less about the small stuff (mismatched ridge tiles included)
Jun 22

The Dog on the Nail: Why We Stay When It Hurts

“He’s not in enough pain yet. It doesn’t hurt enough.” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com - a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali keep it short and let a single story do the heavy lifting. It’s a metaphor Steve picked up from Connor, a colleague in the NLP field: a man walks up his friend’s driveway and hears the dog whimpering on the porch. Not distressed - just grumbling, shifting, uncomfortable. He asks what’s wrong. The friend, entirely unbothered, says: “Dog’s fine. He’s just lying on a nail.” And why doesn’t the dog simply get up and move? “He’s not in enough pain yet.” Kali shares how the story landed for her personally - a decision she’d been circling for a while about stepping away from a big part of what they used to do. Then Steve told her the nail story and it tipped her over: “Right, that’s it. I’m done. The nail’s prodding too much now.” They pair it with Julia Donaldson’s The Snail and the Whale - the snail on the safe, boring rock who gets an itchy foot - and land on the same truth from two directions: most of us aren’t stuck because things are unbearable. We’re stuck because things are tolerable. Comfort is a very effective anaesthetic. So the question worth sitting with this week: what nails are you lying on right now - and how much longer are you willing to lie there? In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: Connor’s story of the dog on the nail - and why the dog doesn’t moveThe trap of “tolerable but not good”: comfort as anaestheticKali’s real decision - how one metaphor pushed her over the lineThe Snail and the Whale and the itchy foot that starts everything
Jun 8

Eight Hours - What Could You Do With the Time Your Phone Steals?

“Eight hours of my time last week. What else could I be doing with that?” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali pick up where the last one left off and turn the spotlight from connection back to the question we’d rather not answer: how much time is your phone actually taking from you? It starts with their podcast recordist Carl showing Kali the screen time setting on her iPhone that morning. Kali confidently guessed a couple of hours a week. The real number? Eight hours. In a single week. Steve, smugly, had his screen time tracking switched off – so he gets a free pass for now, but admits he probably wouldn’t fare much better. From that one number, the conversation opens up into something bigger. How often do we tell ourselves we “haven’t got time” to learn something new, look for a different job, paint the spare room, do a course, get coaching – while a quiet eight hours a week disappears into scrolling we barely remember? Steve and Kali run the maths (kind of) and the point lands: eight hours a week, every week, for a year, is not a small chunk of life. What could you write, walk, learn, finish, or simply enjoy with that time back? The second half gets into the NLP of it. Because we are, as Kali puts it, a bunch of habits – strategies running on autopilot, including the morning grab-the-phone reflex that eats ten minutes before you’ve even stood up. NLP can’t fix that on its own. As Steve puts it, it’s like learning a musical instrument: there’s no point knowing the technique if you never pick it up and play. They introduce the idea of a pattern interrupt – deliberately replacing one habit with another – and share a lovely tip Kali picked up somewhere: look at some sunshine before you look at your phone in the morning. Open the curtains, step outside, get the natural dopamine hit before the digital one. Steve, fairly, points out this is harder in Manchester in winter. The point still stands: small interrupts, repeated, quietly change everything. If you’ve been telling yourself you don’t have time for the thing you actually want – check your screen time, and then decide what to do with what you find. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: Carl’s iPhone screen time suggestion – and Kali’s eight-hour shockWhy “I haven’t got time” usually isn’t trueThe maths nobody wants to do: eight hours a week, multiplied across a yearWhy NLP only works if you actually apply it (the musical instrument analogy)The “pattern interrupt” – a simple NLP tool for breaking habitsA morning experiment: sunshine before scrollingWhy we are, fundamentally, a collection of habits – and the ones we choose
May 25

Look Up! Staying Connected in a Disconnected World

“I’m not in the concert. I’m recording it. Why am I recording it?” Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali tackle a quiet epidemic of modern life: the slow erosion of real connection in a world built for scrolling. It kicks off with a perfect moment – Kali introducing the topic while Steve is happily filming something on his phone next to her, oblivious. That’s the whole conversation in miniature, and from there they dig into what it actually costs us when our attention is always somewhere else. Kali opens up with her own confession – sitting on the sofa after a long day of training, scrolling Instagram reels, until her partner Matt tapped her on the shoulder and asked her to put her phone down because she hadn’t heard a word he’d said. She follows it with a beautiful contrast: a recent Italian dinner where she watched a family of four spend £120-plus on a meal while Dad scrolled, the kids were on their phones, and Mum tried gamely to hold the conversation together. On her own anniversary dinner a few weeks later, she and Matt made a deliberate pact – phones in handbag and back pocket, not touched all night – and ended up watching the young couple at the next table, where the girl scrolled almost the entire evening while a clearly smitten boy tried his best to impress her. The moment dessert arrived and her phone went down, the connection finally appeared. But it had taken the whole meal to get there. Steve weighs in with two stories that land hard. He once paid £150 to see an artist he loved, and spent the gig watching the band through his phone screen, recording it, missing the guitarist, the drummer, the whole atmosphere – until he caught himself and asked the question that gives this episode its hook. He follows it with the football fan at Stamford Bridge, phone up, recording a free kick – and missing whether the ball actually went in. They round out with the harder edge of the conversation: how apps are deliberately designed for dopamine hits, why human wellbeing is genuinely predicted by the number and quality of our connections, and how disconnection – not just emotionally but physically – quite literally makes us sick. The takeaway isn’t anti-tech or anti-phone. It’s a simple invitation: next time you go out for a meal, leave the phone in your bag, and see what happens when you actually look up. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: Kali’s story: the sofa, the scroll, and the tap on the shoulderTwo restaurant tales – the family of four and the young couple’s “phone-down” turning pointSteve’s £150 concert – and the moment he asked himself “why am I recording this?”How apps are designed to keep you scrolling (and what to do about it)Why disconnection isn’t just a vibe – it has measurable effects on physical and mental healthA simple challenge: leave the phone in your bag the next time you eat out
May 11

The Career Grey Zone - When "Good Enough" Isn't Quite Enough

It wasn’t about the promotion, it wasn’t about the job title – it was about the work itself. Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali turn their attention to a quietly common career predicament: the grey zone. You don’t hate your job. You’re not in crisis. The salary’s decent, you can afford a holiday a year, you’ve got Netflix, you might even have your own parking space. But something’s missing — and you can’t quite put your finger on what. It’s not bad enough to leave, but it’s not good enough to feel alive either. They also dig into the trap of “destination thinking” (“when I get this title / hit this salary / reach this level, I’ll feel better”), why finding the 99% of work you love matters more than escaping the 1% you don’t (Kali’s solution to her hated accounting work: hire an accountant), and a wonderful Jim Bowen “Bullseye” analogy about the 55-year-old delegate who said she wanted to be a coach — and what she’d be looking back at in ten years’ time if she didn’t take the small first steps. If you’ve been telling yourself “I should be grateful — it’s a good job” while quietly wondering if there’s something more, this is a permission slip to take that seriously. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: What the career “grey zone” actually feels like — and why it’s harder to escape than outright misery“Destination thinking” — why “when I get there, I’ll feel better” rarely deliversThe Bullseye principle: what you could have won, and why small steps now matterHow to double down on the work you love (and offload the bits you don’t)
Apr 20

Above the Line, Below the Line - The One Model That Underpins Everything

The diagnosis is the diagnosis – but how you experience it is up to you. Welcome back to the NLP UK Training podcast! Hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser from NLPUKTraining.com – a leading provider of NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner certification in the UK. In this episode, Steve and Kali introduce what Steve openly calls the single most important thing he’d teach if he only had one model to share: above the line, below the line. It’s a simple framework with a huge ripple effect. Above the line lives Ownership, Accountability and Responsibility (OAR — you’re rowing your own boat). Below the line lives Blame, Excuses and Denial (BED – you’ve pulled the duvet over your head and hidden from the world). The premise is uncompromising: you’re either in one place or the other. You don’t get to fluctuate in between. What gives this episode its weight is Kali’s story. She shares openly about being diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis around the time she met Steve — a diagnosis that forced her to give up the dance company she’d been running five nights a week. For a long time, she sat below the line, blaming the condition for how she felt. The shift came when she realised that while the diagnosis itself wasn’t going to change, how she experienced it absolutely was within her control. Once she started taking small responsible actions for her own health, something quietly shifted – and kept shifting. They also bring in lighter examples: Kali’s wet-weather drive that morning (left earlier, cup of coffee, music on, no panic), the manager who taught his whole team the model not by lecturing but by saying “I’m a bit below the line about this” until people got curious enough to ask, and the litter-pickers Steve spotted in Ashby on a Sunday morning – a small act of personal responsibility that quietly changes a community. If there’s one episode of the podcast worth sending to a friend, Steve thinks it’s this one. Listen, draw the line on a piece of paper, and ask yourself the question that genuinely changes everything: am I above the line about this. In this episode, Steve and Kali discuss: The above-the-line / below-the-line model in full (OAR vs BED)Why you can’t sit in the middle — and how to spot which side you’re onKali’s personal story: a life-changing diagnosis and the shift from blame to ownershipHow to introduce the model to a team without lecturing themThe “cause vs effect” concept from NLP and why it’s a powerful place to liveSteve’s pick for the one thing he’d teach above anything else

Ever feel like you've got the ambition but something keeps getting in the way? Welcome to the NLP UK Training Podcast, hosted by NLP Trainers Steve Kay and Kali Fraser. Each episode is a short, honest conversation about the tools, mindsets and principles that help people get out of their own way - from practical NLP techniques to the Three Principles. Real stories, real experience, no jargon.

Creator

Quality Culture
Years Active

2023 - 2026
Episodes

81
Rating

Clean
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© Quality Culture
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NLP UK Training Podcast