What happens when the life you built looks whole from the outside, but inside, you’re quietly falling apart? For Rish, the unraveling began with grief. The sudden death of one of his closest friends reopened wounds he didn’t yet understand, including the loss of his father and childhood trauma he had buried for decades. Then came fatherhood, a source of enormous love, but also an unexpected trigger for pain he couldn't name. He began drinking. His marriage deteriorated. And surrounded by a culture that told him to “man up,” keep moving and push his emotions aside, Rish found himself sinking deeper into isolation, shame and hopelessness. Until he made a plan to end his life. He wrote letters for his young son to open on future birthdays. He prepared his goodbyes. He chose the day. And then, in a series of seemingly ordinary moments, including a closed gym, a brutal workout and a room full of strangers cheering him on, something shifted. Rish survived that day. But survival was only the beginning. In this deeply vulnerable episode of The Fire Inside, Rish takes us inside the years that followed: therapy that uncovered childhood sexual abuse he had never fully confronted, learning to understand the trauma behind his behavior, rebuilding his relationship with himself, redefining masculinity, and creating the support system he once desperately needed. Today, the man who once believed his son might be better off without him is determined to help create a world where boys and men know that vulnerability and strength can exist in the same body, and where asking for help is never something to be ashamed of. Through his book, Break Up With Yourself, his advocacy, fatherhood and even the miles he now runs in honor of survivors, Rish has transformed some of the darkest chapters of his life into purpose. This conversation is raw. It is tender. And above all, it is a reminder that the version of you who is hurting today does not get to decide how the rest of your story ends. Your life can change. Your pain can become purpose. And sometimes, the smallest moment is the one that keeps you here long enough to find out what comes next. Content note: This episode contains candid conversations about suicide, alcohol misuse, childhood sexual abuse, trauma and mental health.
