Aging Fiercely Podcast

AM Costanzo
  • 5.0 (8)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Welcome to the Aging Fiercely Podcast! 💋 Who says life over 40 means slowing down? We’re here to flip the script on aging! Forget the scale and the “summer body” obsession—it’s about building strength, changing the narrative, and experiencing more wild adventures! Midlife isn't a crisis - it's a comeback! 👊 amcostanzo.substack.com

  1. 6D AGO

    The Secret Gateway to Change? It's Self-Trust — and Here's How to Build It

    Some of the most important things you'll ever do for yourself will happen when nobody's watching. No applause, no recognition, no validation — just you, choosing yourself. In this episode, we're talking about showing up for yourself in the quiet, unglamorous moments that don't make the highlight reel but absolutely build the foundation of who you're becoming. I share what happened when I went live on Substack and nobody showed up — and why it was one of the most meaningful things I've done for my growth. We dig into nervous system regulation and identity work, and why your body's resistance to doing the scary thing isn't a stop sign — it's the exact place where self-trust gets built. If you've been waiting for someone to notice your effort, validate your path, or give you permission to keep going, this episode is your reminder that the most powerful thing you can do is show up for yourself — consistently, bravely, and without needing an audience to make it count. This is how we age fiercely. Key Takeaways1. Your Body Resists Change Before Your Mind Does — and That's Normal That physical feeling of wanting to run, hide, or make cookies instead of showing up? It's not weakness — it's your nervous system doing its job. Recognizing it as resistance rather than a sign to stop is the first step in breaking through fear and building self-trust. 2. You Need a Body-Based Tool, Not Just Mindset Pep Talks Reasoning your way through resistance only gets you so far. I share my personal secret weapon — a specific song that helps me shift from anxious overthinking into my body — and why getting somatic before doing something scary is a game-changer for nervous system regulation and personal growth. 3. Nobody Showing Up Is Not a Sign to Stop — It's a Sign You're Building When you do the brave thing and the world doesn't immediately applaud you, that is not failure. That is momentum. Showing up for yourself, even when no one is watching, is how you create the energetic shift that changes everything over time. Free Monthly Goal-Setting & Reflection ClubEvery month I host two free live sessions on Substack — one at the beginning of the month to set your intentions, and one at the end to reflect on how far you've come. It's interactive, it's real-time, and it's free to join. All you need is a free Substack subscription to get access. 👉 Join me here: amcostanzo.substack.com Connect With MeWebsite: amcostanzo.com  YouTube:@amcostanzowellness  Pinterest: acostanzo  Instagram: am_costanzo 💬 Let's Continue the ConversationWhat was your biggest takeaway from this episode? I'd love to hear from you!  If this hit home for you, I'd love it if you'd leave a quick 5-star rating or just drop a ❤️ in the comments. Or hit that follow button so we can keep spreading the word that midlife isn't a crisis — it's a comeback! 👊

    18 min

  2. FEB 12

    The More Routine Your Life Gets, The Scarier Any Change Becomes

    Ever notice how the more stuck in routine you get, the harder it becomes to do anything different? I went live on Substack for the first time and completely lost my mind—sweating, heart racing, wanting to hit "end" the entire time. And I realized something: my day-to-day had become so programmed that any deviation sent my brain into a tailspin. In this episode, I walk you through what happened when I forced myself to step outside my comfort zone and why that terrifying feeling isn't a red flag—it's actually proof you're expanding. I break down the difference between real danger fear and the fear of doing something unknown, why your nervous system fights change so hard even when you desperately want something more, and share my favorite goal-setting approach that focuses on emotions instead of outcomes. If you're a woman over 40 who feels stuck in routine but craves expansion, this one's for you. Plus, I'm starting a free accountability chat on Substack where we can navigate these uncomfortable changes together. Key Takeaways 1. Not all fear is created equal—learn to distinguish growth fear from danger fear Your body's fear response doesn't differentiate between a dangerous situation and simply doing something new and vulnerable. When you feel fear around exposing yourself or trying something different, that's your nervous system reacting to the unknown—not actual danger. Learning to recognize this difference helps you push through instead of retreat. 2. Comfort zone routines keep you stuck, even when you desperately want to expand The more programmed and routine your daily life becomes, the harder it is for your brain to handle any deviation. Even when you consciously want to feel elevated and expansive, your nervous system will fight you on anything that feels unfamiliar. This resistance is preventing the growth you're craving. 3. The Sun Ray Method: Goal-setting that focuses on emotions, not outcomes Pick one goal for the next month, write it in the center of your paper, draw six lines out like sun rays, and write the emotions you'll feel when you accomplish it. Instead of focusing on unpredictable outcomes (like how many people show up), you focus on what you can control—showing up and connecting to those feelings of confidence, pride, accomplishment, and self-trust. Free Resource Ready to take action on your goals? Join my free accountability chat on Substack where we can support each other through uncomfortable growth together! 👉 Join here: amcostanzo.substack.com/subscribe Connect With Me Substack: amcostanzo Pinterest: acostanzo Instagram: am_costanzo YouTube: amcostanzowellness 💬 Let's Continue the Conversation What was your biggest takeaway from this episode? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram and tag me @am_costanzo. Don't forget to subscribe, rate ⭐️, and review the podcast if you found this episode valuable. It helps other people discover the show! ❤️

    23 min

  3. JAN 29

    You've Got Big Goals, and It Feels Like You're Going All In. But What If That's Not the Case?

    There's a big difference between going all in and doing just enough in order to stay comfortable. Recently, I've realized I've been circling my goals, meaning I'm keeping them at arm's length instead of actually committing the time and effort to make them a reality. And I figured out why: I'm playing it safe because I don't want to embarrass myself or disappoint anyone. So what ends up happening? I abandon myself instead. In this episode, I break down the barriers we create that keep us stuck: the people-pleasing that makes us unmemorable, the busy work that looks productive but keeps us dancing around what we really want, and why we're so terrified of being vulnerable. I also share something that scares me—I'm starting monthly live vision boarding and goal-setting sessions on Substack where we work on one goal together each month. First one is February 3rd at 10am EST, and yeah, I'm nervous nobody will show up. But I'm doing it anyway because one of my words this year is self-trust, and that means showing up for myself even when it's uncomfortable. If you're a woman over 40 who's tired of the hokey pokey approach to your goals (one foot in, one foot out), come join me. Key Takeaways1. People-pleasing keeps you safe but makes you unmemorable When you don't rock the boat and try to make everyone like you by staying in the background, you end up being kind of forgettable. You might look back and realize you've had friendships but no deep, real connections—because you've been trying to be everything to everyone, which means you're really not much to anyone. The reason we don't go all in? We're managing our vulnerability. 2. "Working on It" isn't the same as going all in - overcoming goal avoidance You can spend years creating podcasts, shooting videos, writing programs, and staying busy—but if you're still keeping your goals at arm's length, you're playing it safe. The hokey pokey approach (putting one leg in, taking it out, circling around) keeps you from the vulnerability of truly committing. Going all in means being willing to say "I did this embarrassing thing and nobody showed up, but I showed up for myself." 3. There's power in doing uncomfortable things together as a community Starting February 3rd, I'm hosting monthly live vision boarding and goal-setting sessions on Substack (10am EST). We'll work on one goal each month, support each other through an accountability chat, and come back together at month's end to reflect on what we learned. Join the Live Vision Boarding Sessions: amcostanzo.substack.com/subscribe Connect With MeFOLLOW ME: SUBSTACK: AGING FIERCELY PINTEREST: ACOSTANZO INSTAGRAM: AM_COSTANZO YOUTUBE: AMCOSTANZOWELLNESS 💬 Let's Continue the ConversationWhat's the one goal you've been circling around instead of diving into? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram or Pinterest and tag me. If this hit home for you, I'd love it if you'd leave a quick 5-star rating or just drop a ❤️ in the comments. Or hit that follow button so we can keep spreading the word that midlife isn't a crisis—it's a comeback!

    17 min

  4. JAN 22

    Stop Waiting for Permission: How to Trust Yourself and Take Bold Steps in Midlife

    In this episode, I'm getting real about something I just realized: I've been waiting for permission to do the things I really want to do. I've been circling my dreams instead of going all in—playing it safe by putting myself out there without actually asking for what I want. I share a story about an uncomfortable gondola ride at a ski resort that showed me how I've been abandoning myself in small ways, waiting for someone to grant me permission to charge for my services, turn on paid subscriptions, and truly own my value. If you're a woman over 40 who's been keeping your goals at arm's length, afraid to rock the boat, or struggling with people pleasing, I hope this episode challenges you to shift just one degree and finally give yourself permission to do the things that scare you. It's time for both of us to stop self-abandoning and start showing up for ourselves. Key Takeaways 1. You might be waiting for permission without realizing it Many of us keep ourselves safe by "doing things" without actually asking for what we want—whether that's charging for services, setting boundaries, or pursuing bold goals. We circle our dreams instead of going all in. 2. People pleasing and self-abandonment show up in unexpected ways Sometimes the smallest moments—like getting on a gondola when you don't want to—reveal how often you override your own needs to avoid rocking the boat or meeting others' expectations. 3. Shifting one degree is enough to start You don't need everything figured out to take a bold step forward. Start by giving yourself permission to do just one thing that scares you, and trust that the path will reveal itself. Connect With Me Website: amcostanzo.comYouTube: amcostanzowellnessPinterest: acostanzoInstagram: aging.fiercely 💬 Let's Continue the Conversation What was your biggest takeaway from this episode? Are you waiting for permission in some area of your life? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram and tag me. (@aging.fiercely) Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast if you found this episode valuable. It helps other people discover the show! ❤️

    16 min

  5. JAN 15

    Your Deepest Fear: Being Powerful Beyond Measure

    Starting 2026 with self-trust and protecting your peace might be the most radical thing you do this year. In this powerful episode about identity work for women over 40, I share why our deepest fear isn't inadequacy—it's actually that we're powerful beyond measure, and what that means for creating lasting change in midlife. If you've been struggling with nervous system regulation, feeling like you're constantly running from one thing to the next, or wondering how to build self-trust after years of self-abandoning, this episode is for you. Key Takeaways1. Your Deepest Fear Is Actually Your Greatest Power - Identity Work & Self-Trust Marianne Williamson wrote in A Return to Love: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." When you realize the enormity of your potential, it means questioning everything—the routines, relationships, and beliefs that built your current life. This is why personal transformation feels so scary: it requires dismantling what you've created to step into who you're becoming. 2. Protecting Your Peace Means Slowing Down & Nervous System Regulation Protecting your peace isn't just a phrase—it's about dropping into the present moment instead of spiraling through your to-do list. When you slow down and get conscientious about what you're doing (even packaging a box), you stop future-thinking, calm your nervous system, and actually do better work. This is the opposite of the dysregulated state we've normalized. 3. Internal Change Creates External Results Through Identity Work If you don't change on the inside, nothing lasting will change on the outside. How you see yourself internally shows up externally. This is why willpower doesn't work for midlife women—you can't sustain change that conflicts with your identity. My new Breakthrough Sessions focus on closing the gap between how you feel now and how you want to feel by shifting how you see yourself at the identity level. Connect With MeSubstack - substack.com/amcostanzo Website: amcostanzo.com Pinterest: acostanzo Instagram: aging.fiercely If this hit home for you, I'd love it if you'd leave a quick 5-star rating or just drop a ❤️ in the comments. Or hit that follow button so we can keep spreading the word that midlife isn't a crisis—it's a comeback! Episode Highlights[00:04] Welcome to 2026 and why this year feels different[14:00] Understanding what "protect your peace" really means[22:00] The power of slowing down and dropping into the moment[37:38] Why identity work is the key to lasting transformation[48:00] Marianne Williamson's quote: "Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure"[56:00] What it means to have power beyond measure[66:00] Starting to see yourself differently and rocking the boat[80:00] The two words guiding 2026: calm certainty and self-trust[92:00] Ending self-abandonment and what that journey looks like

    21 min

  6. 12/31/2025

    Making Genuine Connections, and Finding Sparks of Joy in Midlife with Cheryl Dillon

    Making real friends in midlife can be harder than it should be. But here's the thing: genuine connection might be exactly what's missing when life starts to feel like you're just checking boxes. In this episode, I'm talking with Cheryl Dillon, founder of Funderful Experiences, about how she's creating spaces where midlife women can connect—not surface-level "how are the kids" stuff, but real conversations that fill you up instead of drain you. Cheryl spent 15 years as a divorce coach, and then hit this turning point where she realized she wanted more joy in her own life. Not because anything was broken, but because she started asking herself: What do I want? What lights me up? And why am I waiting to change? We dive into why midlife is this pivotal moment when you start questioning everything, how to stop living for everyone else's approval, and why putting yourself out there to find new friendships is so worth the awkwardness. Cheryl also gets real about "kissing frogs" to find your people, why being busy is often just avoidance, and how doing the things that bring you joy isn't selfish—it's essential. If you're craving more meaningful connections and ready to prioritize what matters to you, this conversation will remind you that it's not too late. Key Takeaways 1. Mortality awareness is your wake-up call to live more authentically When you start recognizing that time is finite, everything shifts. We explore why this realization pushes you to stop making excuses, carve out your own path, and ask yourself, "If not now, when?" instead of waiting for permission to live fully. 2. Self-love isn't selfish—it's the missing piece to everything else Becoming your own best friend transforms how you show up in every area of life. Cheryl shares why learning to love yourself through therapy, coaching, or small daily practices is the foundation for creating the meaningful friendships and joyful experiences you're missing. 3. Creating connection requires intentional community and shared experiences Cheryl's Funderful Experiences membership brings midlife women together through gatherings designed to spark authentic connection and joy. We talk about how showing up, being vulnerable, and prioritizing these soul-feeding moments isn't a luxury—it's essential for your well-being. 4. Time scarcity is often just avoidance in disguise We tell ourselves we're "too busy" for friendships, but prioritizing connection actually gives you energy back. Those meaningful conversations and fun moments with friends aren't luxuries—they're what feed your soul and make everything else easier. Connect With Cheryl Dillon Website: funderfulexperiences Instagram: @funderful_experiences Connect With Me Website: amcostanzo.com Instagram: aging.fiercely YouTube: amcostanzo  💬 Let's Continue the Conversation What was your biggest takeaway from this episode? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram! Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast if you found this episode valuable. It helps other women discover the show! ❤️

    55 min

  7. 12/23/2025

    A Completely Different Approach to Goal Setting That Doesn't Require You to "Do" Anything

    I'm sharing a completely different approach to goal setting that focuses on embodying the feelings you want to experience before you achieve your goals. I walk you through the Sun Ray Method—a powerful visualization technique I learned from spiritual businesswoman Cathy Heller—that helps you connect with how you'll actually feel once you've achieved your goal. Whether you want to lose weight, start a side hustle, improve your relationships, or (like me) become financially free, this somatic approach to goal setting will help you manifest what you truly want by getting into your body and activating those emotions now. This isn't your typical New Year resolution advice—this is about feeling good in your body first, which naturally pulls your goals toward you. Key Takeaways 1. The Sun Ray Method for Midlife Goal Setting Draw a circle with your primary goal in the center, then create six rays extending outward. On each ray, write an emotion you'll feel once you achieve that goal—words like "expansive," "peaceful," "free from regret," or "excited." This visual practice helps you connect your goals to genuine feelings rather than external outcomes. 2. Embody Your Goals Before Achieving Them Your brain doesn't distinguish between a vividly imagined emotion and one you're actually experiencing in real time. By intentionally activating the feelings associated with your achieved goal—getting into your body and feeling expansive, calm, or lit up—you're already there. This somatic approach helps manifest goals by pulling them in energetically. 3. The True End Goal Is Always Feeling Good in Your Body Whether your goal is weight loss, financial freedom, or better relationships, the ultimate desire is to feel good in your body. By focusing on how you want to feel first—rather than grinding through workouts you hate or restriction you dread—you create sustainable change that actually lasts beyond January. 🔗 Connect With Me Website: amcostanzo.com Instagram: aging.fiercely Pinterest: acostanzo 💬 Let's Continue the Conversation What was your biggest takeaway from this episode? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram and DM me! Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast if you found this episode valuable. It helps other people discover the show! ❤️

    15 min

  8. 12/11/2025

    How to Count Macros for Weight Loss: A Beginner's Guide for Women Over 40

    Counting macros for weight loss might be the game-changer you've been looking for if you're stuck in midlife. In this episode, I break down exactly how to track macros and why understanding your protein, carbs, and fats can transform your body—especially during perimenopause when that stubborn belly fat in midlife shows up out of nowhere. I share my personal experience losing six pounds, gaining serious strength, and finally having energy again without afternoon naps. If you've been eating "healthy" and working out but still not seeing results, this macro tracking guide for women over 40 will show you what's missing. I walk you through setting up the Cronometer app, calculating your protein intake for midlife women (hint: it's about 1 gram per pound of your goal weight), and understanding why your cheese habit might be sabotaging your progress. Whether you're new to macro counting for beginners or ready to finally lose that stubborn weight, this episode gives you the exact framework to start tracking today—even if you only do it for a month. Key Takeaways 1. The 1 Gram Protein Rule for Sustainable Weight Loss in Midlife Your protein target should be approximately 1 gram per pound of your goal body weight—not your current weight. So if your goal is 160 pounds, you need 160 grams of protein daily. This high protein intake for women over 40 is essential for maintaining muscle while losing fat, keeping you full, and fueling your workouts. It's not about willpower—it's about giving your body the right fuel. 2. Track Everything for One Month to Gain Awareness  Macro tracking isn't about perfection—it's about awareness. Spend the first month as "recon," tracking everything you eat to understand where your hidden fats and carbs are coming from. You'll be shocked at what you learn. The goal isn't to hit perfect numbers immediately; it's to collect intel on your actual eating patterns so you can make informed adjustments. Use the free Cronometer app to make counting macros for beginners simple and sustainable. 3. Balance Your Macros: 40% Protein, 30% Carbs, 30% Fat for Fat Loss For weight loss in perimenopause, aim for roughly 40% of your calories from protein (that 1 gram per pound rule), 30% from healthy fats (about 45-55 grams), and 30% from carbs (120-140 grams). This isn't a restrictive diet—it's strategic fueling. When you balance macros for midlife women, you'll eat more food, feel fuller, snack less, and finally see the strength and body composition changes you've been working toward. Pair this with heavy strength training (non-negotiable!) and watch your body transform. 🔗 Connect With Me Website: amcostanzo.com YouTube: acostanzowellness Instagram: aging.fiercely 💬 Let's Continue the Conversation Have you tried macro tracking before? What's holding you back from starting? I'd love to hear from you! Share your thoughts on Instagram or Pinterest and tag me. If this hit home for you, I'd love it if you'd leave a quick 5-star rating or just drop a ❤️ in the comments. Or hit that follow button so we can keep spreading the word that midlife isn't a crisis—it's a comeback! 👊

    23 min
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5
out of 5
8 Ratings

About

Welcome to the Aging Fiercely Podcast! 💋 Who says life over 40 means slowing down? We’re here to flip the script on aging! Forget the scale and the “summer body” obsession—it’s about building strength, changing the narrative, and experiencing more wild adventures! Midlife isn't a crisis - it's a comeback! 👊 amcostanzo.substack.com

Information

  • Creator
    AM Costanzo
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    115
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2025 AM Costanzo
  • Show Website
    Aging Fiercely Podcast

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