You're Overqualified Podcast - Career and Leadership Strategies for Women

Dani Tan - Leadership Coach and Speaker
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I'm Dani Tan, Founder and leadership coach of She Belongs Here™, a leadership and culture organization for women ready to get promoted, lead on their own terms, and redefine what leadership looks like. I coach high-achieving women through the strategy, visibility, and positioning moves that actually move the needle, and I work with organizations building cultures where their best talent can lead. Former VP, first-gen, 11 promotions in 11 years, I've lived this work before I built it. Learn more about me and my mission at danitan.com

  1. 1d ago

    135. Doing the Job Above You With No Promotion? Here's What To Do

    In episode 135, we're talking about what actually moves the needle when you've been doing the job above your title — and still waiting on that promotion. If you've been going above and beyond for months, getting great feedback, and still hearing nothing, this one is for you. You are not behind. You've just been working without the right positioning in place. In this episode, I break down a real client story: a new manager at a fast-growing startup who was doing the job above her title for six months with no movement and exactly what changed when we shifted her strategy. In this episode, I cover: → Why having a great manager relationship isn't enough to get you promoted → The stakeholder mapping exercise that changed everything for her → How she went from invisible to promoted in under three months — and built influence that followed her everywhere after Key Takeaways: – You are not underperforming — you are underpositioned – Your manager's support alone does not move a promotion forward; the GM and cross-functional partners need to know your work too – Confidence isn't a prerequisite to taking action — you build it by mapping what you already know – Visibility inside your org is step one; visibility outside is what unlocks the next level – The skills you build through this process — presenting, relationship-building, communicating impact — transfer to every next move Chapters: 00:00 — Welcome & About the Podcast 01:36 — The Client Story: Before 03:55 — The Coaching Steps: Stakeholders, Confidence, and the GM Meeting 06:09 — Building Visibility Beyond the Organization 08:20 — The Lesson: A Skill, Not a One-Time Fix How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  2. Jul 16

    134. The Promotion Questions You're Afraid to Ask (Answered)

    In episode 134, we're getting into the promotion questions you're afraid to ask, the real ones, pulled straight from a room full of high-achieving women. You are already delivering above your title. This one is for the woman who is doing the work and is ready for the actual playbook, not more vague feedback. I taught a live training this week and opened it up for real questions, and the coaching I gave on each is the whole episode. In this episode, I cover: → Why getting denied an internal promotion is almost never about your capability → What to do when your company "pauses" promotions (and the parallel path that protects you) → How to get your title and pay to finally match the work you are doing → The reframe for checking in on your promotion without feeling annoying → How to build relationships with decision-makers in a new or remote role Key Takeaways: – Promotions are decided by more than your manager. Positioning and visibility with the right people is the lever – "Waiting" quietly adds time to your promotion cycle. Run a parallel path instead – Vet an organization's health the same way they vet you – Follow up like a dog with a bone: document, check in, repeat – Every question comes back to three things: your roadmap, your ecosystem, and your visibility Chapters: 00:01 Meet Dani + who this is for 02:22 Denied the internal promotion, what am I missing? 04:38 Delivering at the next level, but promotions are paused 09:17 Vetting the health of your organization 11:00 Your title and pay don't match (and asking backfired) 13:53 Checking in without feeling annoying 16:11 Building relationships in a new or remote role 18:29 The three themes behind every promotion question 20:46 The replay, the bonus, and working together How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  3. Jul 9

    133. Why Someone Less Qualified Just Got Promoted Over You

    In episode 133, we are talking about the thing no one names when they talk about getting promoted: the discomfort of being seen. If you have been putting in the work and still getting passed over, there is a good chance it is not your performance that is the issue. It is that not enough of the right people know about it — and that somewhere along the way, being visible started to feel uncomfortable. This episode is for you. In this episode, I break down why discomfort with visibility is the most common blocker for high performers, and what strategic visibility specifically looks like at the manager, director, and VP level. In this episode, I cover:→ Why feeling uncomfortable being seen and recognized for your work is keeping you stuck→ What strategic visibility looks like at the manager level versus the director level versus VP — and why the approach is different at each one→ Why the skills that got you here will not automatically get you to the next level Key Takeaways:– The discomfort you feel about being seen for your work is not humility. It is the thing keeping you stuck.– If you are going for manager, being siloed in your work and not showing a ripple effect on your team is what holds you back.– Director requires visibility beyond your team — into the organization and with executive leadership.– VP is a highly strategic and influential role. Executive presence, business impact, and innovation are what get you there.– Strategic visibility is a skill. It is learnable. And it changes everything. Chapters:00:01 Who this is for and why you are overqualified02:13 What actually happened when someone less qualified got promoted over you04:26 Strategic visibility and making the right people know your work06:45 Why feeling uncomfortable being seen is keeping you stuck How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Join my training on July 15th ⁠⁠here⁠⁠Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  4. Jul 2

    132. The 3 People Who Decide Your Promotion (and Why Your Manager Isn't Enough)

    In episode 132, we're talking about why someone less qualified just got promoted over you — and what actually happened. You did the work. You hit your goals. You got great feedback. And somehow, they got the promotion. That is one of the most demoralizing things that can happen in a career. And I want you to hear this right now: it was not your quality of work. It was positioning, visibility, and timing. Those are the parts of the system that no one ever taught you. And every single one of them is learnable. In this episode, I break down why strategic visibility is the difference between invisible excellence and getting promoted, and what it actually looks like at every career level. In this episode, I cover:→ Why the person who got promoted over you was not better — they were just better positioned→ What invisible excellence is and why great work alone will not get you promoted→ Why your manager carrying your name into the room is not enough→ How strategic visibility works at every level from individual contributor to VP→ What it means to be known by the right people before the promotion decision is made Key Takeaways:– It was not your quality of work. It was positioning, visibility, and timing.– The woman who stops getting passed over is making sure the right people know her work before the decision is made. On purpose.– Invisible excellence is doing great work that the wrong people know about. Strategic visibility is what changes that.– Being seen is not bragging. It shows you can present, build relationships, and communicate impact. Those are leadership skills.– Whatever level you are at, the path forward requires influence beyond your direct team. Chapters:00:01 Who this is for and why you are overqualified02:13 Why someone less qualified just got promoted over you04:26 Strategic visibility and making the right people know your work06:45 Why being uncomfortable being seen is keeping you stuck How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Join my training on July 15th ⁠here⁠Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  5. Jun 25

    131. Why You Get Great Reviews but Never Get Promoted

    In episode 131, we're talking about why getting great reviews and getting promoted are two completely different decisions — and what it actually takes to win both. You are doing the work. You are hitting your goals. Your manager thinks you are incredible. And you are still not getting promoted. That is not a reflection of your performance. It is a reflection of a system that no one explained to you. And in this episode, I am breaking it down. In this episode, I cover:→ Why promotions are not decided at your review and when they actually are→ What strategic visibility means and why the right people need to know your work→ How timing is the truth teller when it comes to your promotion cycle→ Why your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted→ What it takes at each level: individual contributor to manager, manager to director, senior leader to VP Key Takeaways:– Great reviews and promotions are two different decisions. You can be acing one and not even be in the room for the other.– Promotions are shaped and planned months before your review. By the time you sit down, the conversation has already happened.– Strategic visibility is not bragging. It is making sure the right people know your work before the decision is made.– Your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted. Multiple decision makers are part of that process.– Planning in advance is not optional. It is the whole game. Chapters:00:04 Who this is for and why you are overqualified02:23 Why great reviews do not equal promotions04:37 Strategic visibility and making sure the right people know your work07:00 Planning in advance and what to do next How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Join my training on July 15th hereBook a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  6. Jun 12

    130. Why You're Still Stuck Even Though You're Doing Everything Right

    In episode 130, we're talking about why you can be doing everything right and still feel completely stuck. You are not the problem. The women I work with are smart, driven, ambitious, and high-achieving. They have strong performance reviews. They are doing everything right. And they are stuck. Not because they are not working hard enough. Because what got them here will not get them there. And most of the time, the specific thing keeping them at their current level is something they cannot see on their own. In this episode, I break down the three most common blockers keeping high achievers stuck, why your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted, and why more information is not what closes this gap. In this episode, I cover:→ Why doing more is working against you at a certain career level→ The bubble problem: why only your manager knowing your work is keeping you stuck→ Why your manager is not the sole decision maker in your promotion→ The difference between research mode and action that actually moves you forward→ What one client did in four sessions that she could not do in two years on her own Key Takeaways:– What has served you to get here will not serve you to get to the next level. A new strategy is required.– Your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted. Multiple decision makers are part of that process.– The most expensive thing you can do is stay stuck another year doing the same thing on your own.– The gap is not information. The gap is perspective. You need someone who can see what you cannot see.– Coaching builds a plan custom to your specific manager, your organization, and your goals. That is what moves you forward. Chapters:00:01 Who this podcast is for and why you are overqualified02:10 Why you are stuck even when you are doing everything right04:34 Why doing more is not working at a certain level06:56 Your manager is not the sole person who gets you promoted09:15 Three things to do differently starting now11:33 Why research mode keeps you stuck and what closes the gap13:56 Client story: stuck two years, promoted within six months16:17 The difference between a coach, a therapist, and a mentor18:36 What working together looks like and how to book your call How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  7. Jun 6

    129. How to Say No at Work Without Blowing Up Your Career

    In episode 129, we're talking about how to say no at work without it costing you your career, your credibility, or your peace. You have been rewarded for saying yes. It's gotten you promoted, recognized, and into the room. So it makes sense that saying no feels dangerous. This episode is for the high achievers, especially women, women of color, and first-gen professionals, who know they need to start saying no and just need the language to do it. In this episode, I break down The Three No's, the exact framework I walked my private coaching clients through in a recent workshop, plus how to hold your position when someone keeps pushing back. In this episode, I cover:→ Why high achievers struggle to say no (it's conditioning, not weakness)→ The three types of no: the hard no, the redirect, and the negotiated no→ What to do when a one-time ask becomes a pattern→ How to make your trade-offs visible instead of just absorbing more work→ What to say when someone won't take no for an answer Key Takeaways: No is not the opposite of ambition. No is what ambition looks like when you have a strategy.Saying yes to everything gets you labeled as execution. Saying no strategically gets you seen as a leader.You do not have to answer in real time. Pausing before you commit is a skill.When a favor becomes a pattern, it needs a direct conversation, not another yes.Chapters:00:00 Why ambitious women struggle to say no02:23 What Dani's private client workshop revealed04:39 When work gets offloaded onto you that isn't yours06:52 Being conditioned to say yes (and what it costs you)09:49 The Three No's: hard no, redirect, and negotiated no12:11 When it stops being a favor and becomes a pattern14:28 Pause before you dive in (you don't have to answer in real time)16:49 Managing a micromanager: the Slack response strategy19:10 How saying no kept one client safe through three rounds of layoffs21:23 Transitioning from executor to strategic leader23:27 What it's like to work with Dani and how to book a call How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠⁠here⁠⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

  8. May 28

    128. When Fear Sounds Like Logic: How Ambitious Women Talk Themselves Out of What They Want

    In episode 128, we're talking about why fear doesn't always look like fear and how high-achieving women in leadership and career growth quietly talk themselves out of what they want by calling it logic. I'm coming in hot with this one: fear is sneaky. It doesn't show up as panic. It shows up as "the timing isn't right" or "I need a little more experience first" or "what if I apply and I don't get it?" And because it sounds that reasonable? We believe it. We stay. We call it being smart. In this conversation, I break down how fear disguises itself as logic, how to tell the difference between fear and intuition, and how to use the evidence ladder framework to build the case for what you actually want, so fear stops winning the argument. In this episode, I cover:→ Why fear sounds like wisdom for ambitious women and high achievers and why that's exactly the problem→ The difference between fear and intuition and how to tell them apart in your own body→ The real reason successful women stay quiet in meetings, skip the promotion conversation, or don't ask for the salary they deserve→ The evidence ladder framework: how to build a case against your own limiting beliefs→ Why your current career decisions might be running on old data from people who no longer deserve that much power Key Takeaways:→ Fear shows up as practical-sounding reasons and that's what makes it so sneaky for high achievers→ If you can't find real evidence that your fear is true, it's not data. It's a story you're telling yourself→ Confidence doesn't come before action. It comes from action→ You are not your sixth-grade self. Stop giving outdated feedback that much power→ You built safety and abundance for yourself. Now you get to choose from that place, not from survival Chapters:00:00 Introduction & Welcome02:20 Fear vs. Logic: What's Really Happening04:34 Why Familiar Feels Safe (Even When It's Keeping You Stuck)06:59 Fear vs. Intuition: How to Tell the Difference09:21 The Client Story: When "Not Wanting to Overstep" Is Actually Fear11:47 The Evidence Ladder Framework14:05 Integrating Your Evidence (Yes, Brainwash Yourself)16:26 Where Your Beliefs Actually Come From18:47 From Survival Mode to Abundance21:06 Closing and Working Together How to work together - book a call or DM with questions on IG or LI. Book a Discovery Call ⁠here⁠ to learn what it's like to work togetherConnect and DM on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect and DM on IG: ⁠www.instagram.com/danitani/⁠My site: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.danitan.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join my weekly newsletter

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5
out of 5
7 Ratings

About

I'm Dani Tan, Founder and leadership coach of She Belongs Here™, a leadership and culture organization for women ready to get promoted, lead on their own terms, and redefine what leadership looks like. I coach high-achieving women through the strategy, visibility, and positioning moves that actually move the needle, and I work with organizations building cultures where their best talent can lead. Former VP, first-gen, 11 promotions in 11 years, I've lived this work before I built it. Learn more about me and my mission at danitan.com

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