Church Psychology

The Negev Institute

Mental Health Professionals looking at the intersections of social & behavioral science and the formed Christian life. Visit us for free resources and more at www.ChurchPsychology.org

  1. 11/13/2023

    The Emotional Rollercoaster of Life's Transitions

    Ever found yourself at a crossroads, unsure which path to take? Have you ever questioned how God's will fits into the messy, complicated puzzle of life's transitions? Join us as we peel back the layers of this topic, breaking down the complexities and inviting you into a faith-based dialogue about navigating change. Matt and I bring you on this journey, reminding ourselves and our listeners that God's will is not a static destination but an ever-evolving journey. Transitions, whether they are joyous or filled with grief, can be a tumultuous time. From the euphoria of new beginnings to the subtle melancholy of what we leave behind, our emotions can take us on a rollercoaster ride. During this episode, Matt and I delve into these emotions, discussing the intricacies of friendship-building outside structured environments and the loneliness that can creep in amidst change. We also delve into the coexistence of joy and grief during transitions and why it's crucial to acknowledge these feelings. Sharing personal narratives, we discuss the challenges and victories that come with such a transition, the importance of long-term relationships, and knowing when it's time to let go. Join us as we unpack the wisdom we've acquired on embracing change and taking risks. So head over to our website ChurchPsychology.org and connect with us further, access our free community library, and get your hands on some exclusive content. Let's navigate life's transitions together, one episode at a time.

    46 min
  2. 11/06/2023

    The Number One Phrase to Improve Small Talk

    Ever wondered why small talk, often considered trivial and mundane, can be so significant in establishing deep connections? Buckle up as my co-host, Matt and I, traverse the intriguing landscape of casual chatter, underpinned by an insightful article that captures its appeal and engagement in conversations. We shed light on how to leverage small talk, not just as an ice-breaker, but as a powerful tool to forge meaningful relationships.  Taking cues from the wisdom of CS Lewis, we explore humility as the cornerstone of Christian life and its role in fostering heartfelt conversations. By sprinkling empathy and curiosity into chats, we demonstrate how it's possible to build significant relationships without the crutch of shared interests. We also reveal the underplayed potency of ‘mind-reading’ in conversations - an art that makes others feel acknowledged and understood. As we dissect these elements, it becomes evident that small talk holds the potential to be a game-changer in our interactions. So, join us and learn to embrace the transformative power vested in everyday conversations. Show Notes: https://apple.news/Ayem5YVoMQE2jk2m-SMYvjQhttps://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Think-Faster-Talk-Smarter/Matt-Abrahams/9781668010303https://www.themuse.com/advice/what-is-empathetic-listening-definition-examples1 Peter 3:8 ESV Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.Romans 12:15 ESV Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.Galatians 6:2 ESV  Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

    45 min
  3. 10/23/2023

    Exploring Profanity: Curse Words Communication, and Thoughts on Words in Christianity Formation

    Ever wondered about the power of your words? Are you curious about how your language choices affect your relationships? This episode is a must-listen for you! We take a deep dive into the complex world of language and communication, particularly focusing on the Christian perspective on cussing, swearing, and profanity. Drawing from our personal experiences and the teachings of Scripture, we explore the intriguing paradox of these 'spicy' words and their impact.  We also broaden the scope of our discussions to go beyond mere cussing. By referencing Ephesians 4:29, we touch on how words - even those not typically seen as profane - can either edify or harm depending on their usage. The importance of context, nuances of language, and authenticity in our communication are also highlighted, especially in sensitive areas like Christian-based sex therapy and guiding children on appropriate language use.  The conversation wouldn't be complete without discussing parenting, and we dare to tackle the challenging aspect of teaching our children to express themselves freely yet within certain boundaries. Through our discussions, we underline the significance of validation and understanding the context and intent of the speaker. As our words can either build or break, we advocate for a mindful approach to our language choices. So, strap in for a thrilling exploration of language, communication, and their implications on our Christian journey. Show Notes: Ephesians 4:29 - "No foul language is to come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need, so that it gives grace to those who hear."Ephesians 5:4 - "Coarse and foolish talking or crude joking are not suitable, but rather giving thanks."Colossians 3:8 - "But now you must also put away all the following: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and filthy language from your mouth."Matthew 15:18-19 - "But what comes out of the mouth comes from the heart, and this defiles a man. For from the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual immoralities, thefts, false testimonies, blasphemies."James 3:10 - "Praising and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way."

    44 min
  4. 10/16/2023

    Complex Storytelling: Beyond Just Heroes, Villains, and Victims.

    Ever wondered about the fundamental roles we assign in storytelling and how they shape our understanding of the world? My co-host Matt and I tackle this intriguing topic, discussing how we tend to oversimplify characters as either heroes, victims, or villains. We dive into the subtleties often missed in these narratives and the harm that can occur when we force complex personalities into these basic categories. Biblical stories, with their nuanced character portrayals, serve as a reference in our discussion, and we connect these insights with cognitive behavioral therapy. We journey into the realm of heroism, discussing the works of Joseph Campbell and Carl Jung. Their theories on the hero's journey have greatly influenced our modern Western perception of heroes – but what happens when we simplify and exaggerate these stories? We also mine the research of Malcolm Gladwell and Gordon Allport before circling back to the work of mental health professionals and their role in unfolding narratives. In the final part of our conversation, we examine how trauma impacts memory and storytelling. We discuss 'splitting,' a defense mechanism that leads individuals to view issues in stark black-and-white terms, and how this can sometimes lead to personality disorders. We further explore how the Bible's rich storytelling had a profound impact during its time and reflect on how Christian triumphalism can often lead to a simplified narrative of one's story. So, join us as we appreciate the power of nuance in storytelling and the deeper understanding of complexity and growth it provides. Be sure to connect with our free community library at churchpsychology.org for more insights through webinars, articles, and event notifications. Show Notes Allport, G. W., & Postman, L. (1947). The Psychology of Rumor. Russell & Russell.Gladwell, M. (2000). The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference. Little, Brown and Company.Haven, K. (2014). Story smart: Using the science of story to persuade, influence, inspire, and teach. Bloomsbury Publishing USA.Kernberg, O. F. (1984). Severe personality disorders: Psychotherapeutic strategies. Yale University Press.Paris, J. (2007). The nature of borderline personality disorder: Multiple dimensions, multiple symptoms, but one category. Journal of Personality Disorders, 21(5), 457–473. https://doi.org/10.1521/pedi.2007.21.5.457Ronningstam, E. (2016). Pathological narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder: Recent research and clinical implications. Current Behavioral Neuroscience Reports, 3, 34-42.

    59 min
  5. 10/09/2023

    The Nuclear Family: A Closer Look

    How often do you reflect on the concept of family and its transformation in our society? Join Matt and me as we unpack the intricate layers of the contemporary family unit, specifically the nuclear family. Drawing from our personal experiences, we examine the historical context of the nuclear family and its normalization in American and biblical cultures. We also navigate through the thought-provoking points raised in 'The Nuclear Family Was a Mistake', an insightful article by David Brooks from the Atlantic. What happens when the cost of living changes and starts challenging the sustainability of the nuclear family model? As we pivot our conversation, we uncover the impact of the current economic landscape on the traditional family structure. We delve into the contrast between extended family dynamics and nuclear family dynamics, the role of our family of origin in shaping our identities, and the rise of outsourcing traditional resource needs such as childcare and meals.  Our dialogue takes a turn towards the intersection of families and church life, revealing a fascinating exploration of the contrasting dynamics. We probe into the value system of the nuclear family and the relative stability extended families can offer children. From analyzing the potential of the church to be intrusive or disengaged to balancing the need for blood ties and supportive relationships, our discussion covers it all. As we wrap up, we shine a spotlight on the importance of interdependence in church communities and how individualistic and consumeristic attitudes may influence the perception of church members. Tune in for this enlightening discourse on the nuclear family in America. Show Notes: David Brooks - 'The Nuclear Family Was a Mistake' - https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2020/03/the-nuclear-family-was-a-mistake/605536/ Ruggles, S. (2015). Patriarchy, power, and pay: The transformation of American families, 1800–2015. Demography, 52(6), 1797-1823. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5068828/?fbclid=IwAR3NaNYulnkf7VBmqw2pQ7CoASKyTtZJBrDk7I4nqor3SeRBMBZV8PRLNKkTheology in the Raw. (2023, February 9). Does the Old Testament Dehumanize Women? Dr. Sandy Richter (Exiles 22 Talk + Q & A) [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjnMM36QUjASexual Violence Against Women and the OT Law: https://www.biola.edu/blogs/think-biblically/2020/sexual-violence-against-women

    42 min
  6. 10/02/2023

    Defining "Trauma"- Distress, Impact, and the Power of Connection

    Are we overusing and misrepresenting the term 'trauma'? In the latest episode of Church Psychology, we take a hard look at this pressing issue. We uncover how our society’s rampant misuse of 'trauma' often blurs its distinction from 'distress', diluting its profound meaning and leading to a fatigue that might potentially silence genuine cases of trauma. We want to change this narrative and offer a deeper understanding of trauma, not just as an event, but as an ongoing response to an experience. Trauma is insidious; it doesn't just affect us psychologically but also leaves its imprints on our physiology. We break down the science of trauma and its effects, discussing how it disrupts our brain function, making it difficult to think rationally when our emotions are in turmoil. We also highlight how trauma can be carried across generations, often surfacing in ways that are not easily identifiable. How does our brain's amygdala play a role in this? And can we harness this connection to break free from distressing patterns? Join us as we weave through these intriguing questions in our discussion. We believe in the power of connection, compassion, and contribution as potent tools to address trauma. We also discuss the work of Bill O'Hanlon in post-traumatic growth, throwing light on the concept of victimhood culture and its interplay with the term 'trauma'. In the backdrop of all this, we delve into scripture, drawing parallels from the lives of Joseph and other biblical figures, cementing our understanding of trauma from a psychological and biblical perspective. Together, let's redefine the way we understand and address trauma. Tune in for an enlightening conversation on Church Psychology. Show Notes: Bessel van der Kolk on Trauma - https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748Elliott Connie - https://www.amazon.com/Solution-Focused-Brief-Therapy-Diamond/dp/1401970494Bill O'Hanlon course on trauma - https://psychmaven.teachable.com/p/trauma-without-dramaBill O'Hanlon's book on trauma - https://www.amazon.com/Quick-Steps-Resolving-Trauma-OHanlon/dp/0393706516Street Hope TN - https://streethopetn.org/

    54 min

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Mental Health Professionals looking at the intersections of social & behavioral science and the formed Christian life. Visit us for free resources and more at www.ChurchPsychology.org