Great Sex Podcast

Heather England
  • 5.0 (33)
  • SEXUALITY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Dr. Heather England shares the real truth about midlife intimacy, love, and relationships. Together, we’ll explore these and other midlife topics, and empower you to create a life filled with meaning! This information is intended for educational and informational purposes only and is meant for your personal use to help with enhancing your relationship and sexual intimacy. It is not intended to serve as psychotherapy/counseling and should never be a substitute for medical advice. This information is to be used at your own risk based on your own judgment.

  1. MAR 2

    39: Erectile Dysfunction Series: The Hidden Triggers that Cause Your Erectile Dysfunction to Keep on a Keep'in On

    Summary: In this episode of The Great Sex Podcast, Dr. Heather England dives into the often-overlooked emotional and relational roots of erectile dysfunction (ED). Discover how stress, relationship dynamics, shame, and performance anxiety contribute to ED—and learn actionable insights to break the cycle and improve your sexual confidence. Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:Key topics covered:Overcoming Erectile Dysfunction: The Psychological and Relational Factors You Need to KnowKey Topics:The cyclical nature of psychological causes of ED and how they reinforce each otherThe critical role of emotional intimacy and communication in recoveryHow stress, depression, and life changes impact sexual performanceThe influence of shame and limiting beliefs about sexPerformance anxiety: how it develops and how to interrupt itThe dangers of avoidance behaviors and how to reframe intimacyPractical strategies: talking openly about ED, reducing secrecy, and seeking support Timestamps:00:00 - The story of Andy: understanding performance anxiety and ED cycle 02:05 - Physical causes of ED versus psychological and relational factors 03:01 - The impact of relationship quality, communication, and trust on ED 03:45 - How emotional withdrawal can worsen ED and the importance of emotional intimacy 04:26 - The role of conversations about sex in improving intimacy and ED recovery 05:22 - Stress as a major contributor to ED: work, financial, and family stressors 06:08 - The connection between depression and ED, and addressing mental health 07:05 - Life transitions and their effects on sexual functioning 07:59 - Sexual concerns such as low desire, premature ejaculation, and pain 08:28 - Shame, cultural beliefs, and secrecy: barriers to recovery 09:20 - The importance of open communication and empathy in reducing shame 09:52 - How limited sexual knowledge affects confidence and contributes to ED 10:17 - Avoidance behaviors and their reinforcement of ED cycles 11:02 - Performance anxiety: how anticipatory worries sabotage arousal 11:56 - The neurological process of anxiety and its impact on presence during sex 13:03 - Breaking the cycle: reassurance that ED symptoms are human, not failures 13:41 - The core message: connection and honest conversation as the keys to recovery 14:09 - Practical tips: talk openly, seek therapy, and foster emotional intimacy 14:30 - Final thoughts and encouragement to prioritize communication and support

    15 min

  2. MAR 2

    38. Erectile Dysfunction Series: The Many Medical Causes for Erectile Dysfunction

    Summary: In this episode of the Great Sex Podcast, Dr. Heather England explores the complex causes of erectile dysfunction (ED), emphasizing that it’s a medical condition with physical and psychological roots. She aims to dispel myths and empower men and their partners with knowledge and actionable steps to address ED effectively. Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:Key topics covered:The physical factors contributing to ED, including cardiovascular health, diabetes, obesity, medication side effects, and hormonal imbalancesHow lifestyle choices such as smoking, alcohol consumption, sleep quality, and fatigue influence erectile functionThe psychological cycle of performance anxiety and how physical causes can lead to long-term mental and emotional impactsThe importance of consulting healthcare providers for proper diagnosis, blood work, and early interventionPractical steps for lifestyle modifications and addressing emotional well-being to improve sexual health Timestamps:00:00 - Introduction: Real stories behind ED and what nobody tells you 00:30 - The physical causes of ED: exhaustion, high blood pressure, and more 01:27 - The significance of understanding ED as a medical and psychological condition 02:46 - The role of cardiovascular health in sexual performance 03:42 - How clogged arteries can be an early warning sign for heart problems 04:39 - The impact of diabetes on erectile function and the importance of blood sugar control 05:06 - Obesity's link to ED and the power of weight loss and activity 05:31 - Medications that can cause ED and the importance of consulting your doctor 05:58 - Tobacco use increases ED risk; quitting can restore vascular health 06:28 - Alcohol's depressant effects on arousal and testosterone levels 07:00 - Low testosterone’s impact on erections and overall health 07:41 - Sleep apnea as an underdiagnosed contributor to ED 08:15 - Fatigue and exhaustion as significant yet often overlooked causes 09:01 - Neurological conditions, prostate treatments, Peyronie’s disease, and other medical factors 10:37 - The cycle of physical and psychological causes, and how worry perpetuates ED 11:05 - Practical advice: get medical testing, lifestyle changes, and emotional support 12:22 - The importance of addressing both physical and psychological factors for recovery 13:10 - Success story: Dan’s journey to overcoming ED through medical care and lifestyle adjustments 13:47 - Closing remarks: hope, support, and creating fulfilling sexual relationships

    14 min

  3. MAR 2

    37. Erectile Dysfunction Series: When the Little Blue Pill Doesn't Work; Reigniting Intimacy with Erectile Dysfunction

    In this episode, Dr. Heather England explores the nuanced nature of erectile dysfunction (ED), emphasizing that medications like Viagra are helpful but not foolproof solutions. She discusses the impact of performance anxiety, relationship dynamics, and lifestyle factors, offering practical guidance to improve intimacy and emotional connection. Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:Key Topics:The story of Joe: the emotional toll of ED and quiet sufferingWhy medications like Viagra may fail for 30% of menThe role of performance anxiety and how the brain reacts to sexual setbacksThe physiological effects of stress and fear on arousalHow avoidance behaviors deepen intimacy issuesThe importance of emotional connection and relationship health in desireMedical options beyond medication, including dosage adjustments and alternative treatmentsThe significance of open communication with your partnerShifting the definition of sex to reduce pressure and enhance intimacyBasic lifestyle factors impacting erectile health: sleep, diet, stress, alcoholThe value of addressing psychological factors like anxiety and relationship issuesSuccess stories: Joe’s journey into therapy and improved intimacy Timestamps:00:00 - Introduction: The emotional impact of ED and why it matters 00:27 - Joe’s story: silence and suffering in ED 01:03 - Description of Dr. Heather’s ED series and available workshops 02:15 - The benefits and limitations of ED medications 02:44 - Why 30% of men don’t respond well to pills like Viagra 03:08 - Practical factors influencing medication effectiveness (timing, health conditions) 03:48 - Performance anxiety: what it is and how it affects physiology 04:13 - The brain’s threat detection response during sexual activity 04:34 - How anxiety redirects blood flow away from arousal 05:03 - The cycle of anxiety, medication, and failure 05:30 - The dangers of self-medicating and supplement misuse 05:56 - Avoidance as a barrier to intimacy and increased anxiety 06:23 - The importance of emotional connection in desire 06:53 - Creating desire through emotional intimacy and shared experiences 07:20 - Practical steps: medical consultation and treatment options 07:46 - Open communication with your partner and addressing silence 08:15 - Directly addressing performance anxiety with tools like mindfulness 08:41 - Redefining what sex means to reduce pressure and promote relaxation 09:08 - The role of life habits: sleep, diet, stress management 09:58 - Broader solutions: psychological work, relationship repair, and personal growth 10:27 - Success story: Joe’s therapy journey and renewed intimacy 10:45 - Encouragement: overcoming silence and deepening connection**Resources

    11 min

  4. FEB 27

    36. Erectile Dysfunction Series: The Biggest Contributor to Erectile Dysfunction

    Summary: In this episode of the Great Sex Podcast, Dr. Heather England explains the often-misunderstood phenomenon of performance anxiety erectile dysfunction (ED). She shares practical insights, physiological explanations, and actionable strategies to help men rebuild confidence and trust in their bodies for healthier intimacy. Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:Understanding and Overcoming Performance Anxiety-Related ED with Dr. Heather EnglandKey Topics Covered:The difference between physical ED and performance anxiety EDHow anxiety triggers physiological responses that impair erectionsThe role of the nervous system and safety in arousalWhy reassurance and more effort often worsen performance anxietyThe limitations of medication for anxiety-driven EDSkill-based practices to retrain your body's responseThe importance of practicing in a pressure-reducing wayAddressing partner involvement and reassurance tipsReassuring men that ED is a learned pattern, not a character flawSteps to rebuild trust in your body and enjoy intimacy again Timestamps:00:00 - Introduction to performance anxiety ED and why it matters 00:23 - Real-life example of performance anxiety and its impact 0:52 - What is performance anxiety ED and common misconceptions 1:20 - The role of emotional and physiological responses during sex 2:16 - Understanding the difference: Physical issues vs. anxiety-driven ED 3:13 - How anxiety creates a self-fulfilling cycle of ED 3:42 - The physiology of erections and the importance of feeling safe 4:10 - Why anxious thoughts interfere with the nervous system's response 4:35 - How the nervous system reacts to threat and the effect on blood flow 5:03 - The paradox of reassurance and attempts to 'try harder' 5:58 - Limits of medication in solving anxiety-based ED 6:27 - The importance of retraining the nervous system through practice 6:56 - Why desire to eliminate anxiety entirely isn't realistic 7:07 - How avoidance can reinforce anxiety and the importance of exposure 7:21 - Moving from managing to experiencing pleasure without pressure 7:50 - Recognizing that physiological responses are learned, not flaws 8:16 - Strategies for changing the response pattern through skill-based practice 8:46 - Accepting that anxiety may always show up and how to handle it 9:15 - The significance of staying in your body and sensations 9:44 - Clarifying common myths: It’s not ‘in your head’ or a character flaw 10:13 - When medication doesn’t work, and the importance of matching tools to issues 10:41 - The role of partner involvement and reassurance tips 11:12 - Key takeaways: ED as a nervous system pattern that’s learnable 11:41 - Final encouragement: You’re not broken, and recovery is possible This episode offers a compassionate, science-based approach to understanding ED caused by performance anxiety, emphasizing skills and practice for lasting change.

    13 min

  5. FEB 27

    35. Erectile Dysfunction Series - How ED Poisons Relationships and What to Do About It

    Summary: Discover how erectile dysfunction affects relationships beyond the bedroom, and learn practical strategies to foster intimacy, communication, and emotional connection during this challenging time. Hosted by Dr. Heather England, a certified sex therapist, this episode offers candid insights from someone living with ED and shares resources to support couples. Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:Key Topics: The prevalence of ED: 30 million men in the US and 326 million worldwide experience ED, increasing with ageEmotional and relational impact of ED: how withdrawing from touch and intimacy affects both partnersSocietal and cultural silence around ED: the shame and unspoken secrecy that worsen the problemThe role of psychological factors: anxiety, depression, stress, and performance pressure often contribute to EDStrategies for navigating ED: ongoing communication, redefining intimacy beyond penetrative sex, and seeking professional supportPersonal perspective: Dr. England shares her experience living with her husband's ED and how their relationship evolvedResources for support: online workshops for partners and individuals dealing with performance anxiety and intimacy challengesImportance of continuous dialogue: treating ED as a chronic issue rather than a one-time crisis

    15 min

  6. FEB 27

    34. Erectile Dysfunction Series - Why Trying Hard Makes Your ED Worse and What to Do Instead

    Summary:Discover how psychological and societal factors intertwine with physical health to shape men's experiences with ED, and learn practical strategies to redefine success and foster genuine connection.Resources & Links:Workshop on Mastering Performance AnxietyWorkshop for Female Partners of Men with ED Connect with Dr. Heather England:Substack - A Midlife ReckoningDr. England's WebsiteLinkedIn In this episode:The emotional toll of ED exemplified through Marcus's story of shame and vulnerabilityHow spectatoring and the fight-or-flight response impact erection and intimacyThe harmful "manhood myth" and its role in identity and performance pressureThe psychological spiral that sustains ED beyond physical causesPractical tips to shift from performance focus to authentic connectionThe importance of honesty and professional support in overcoming EDSuccess stories illustrating the power of redefining intimacy and self-perception Timestamps:00:00 - A real-life story illustrating the emotional impact of ED 00:25 - The shame and identity crisis triggered by first episodes 00:53 - Introducing the episode and Dr. Heather England’s background 01:19 - Changes in podcast focus and midlife exploration 02:16 - Resource: Substack for intimacy and midlife topics 03:12 - Workshop details for performance anxiety and partner support 03:46 - ED as an emotionally charged experience beyond physical causes 04:15 - How the brain interprets initial ED episodes as a threat 04:44 - Spectatoring: Being an observer of oneself during sex 05:13 - The biological fight-or-flight response affecting blood flow 05:40 - The myth of the "real man" and its effects on self-worth 07:09 - How societal stories about masculinity shape perceptions of performance 07:34 - The impact of performance-based identity on men's confidence 08:04 - The physical and psychological components of ED 08:32 - Situational causes versus ongoing anxiety loops 09:01 - The sleep analogy: Relaxation is key to relaxation and erection 09:29 - Reframing what success means in intimacy 09:57 - Moving from performance to connection and pleasure 10:27 - The importance of genuine intimacy over solely physical success 10:53 - Partner's perspective and the emotional impact of shutdowns 11:23 - The critical need to seek support and avoid isolation 11:52 - The role of therapy and honesty in recovery 12:22 - Summary of key points: psychological influences, myths, and the healing process 12:50 - Success stories and transforming perceptions of intimacy 13:12 - Marcus’s turnaround through self-perception and managing anxiety 13:40 - Encouragement to prioritize authentic connection and seek support Remember:Overcoming ED involves understanding both the physical and emotional layers. Seeking support is a sign of strength, not weakness. Transform the narrative around masculinity and intimacy, and rediscover pleasure and connection beyond performance.

    14 min

  7. 05/22/2024

    33. Avoiding Masturbation Mistakes

    🙂 If you have erectile dysfunction, performance anxiety may be impacting you. Learn how to overcome performance anxiety erectile dysfunction: https://www.lovefilledlife.com/Overcome-Performance-Anxiety-workshop Summary In this episode, Dr. Heather England discusses male masturbation and the importance of using the right technique. She advises using lube, a lighter touch, and a slower motion during masturbation to create neural pathways that mimic partnered sex. She acknowledges that her opinion may be controversial but encourages listeners to consider the information and apply it to their own lives. Takeaways The right masturbation technique can help with arousal and prevent issues contributing to erectile dysfunction.Using a hard grip, no lube, and a fast motion during masturbation can cause your penis to expect intense stimulation to stay aroused and thus hinder arousal during partnered sex.Train the penis to be aroused during masturbation in a way that mimics partnered sex by using lube, a lighter touch, and a slower motion.Be mindful of the neural pathways created during masturbation and aim to create pathways that are similar to partnered sex.Consider the information shared and apply it to your own life, taking into account your own experiences and preferences. 🔥 Learn How to use Sex Toys to Enhance your Pleasure. Toy Talk Sex Toy Course available at www.lovefilledlife.com/ToyTalk

    11 min

  8. 04/02/2024

    32. Creating Ways to Get in the Mood for Sex

    Summary In this episode, Dr. Heather England discusses the process of transitioning from a non-sexual state to a sexual one. She emphasizes the importance of consent and empowerment in one's sexuality. Dr. England provides practical tips and activities to help individuals get in the mood for sex, such as engaging in activities that create closeness with their partner, thinking about past fulfilling sexual experiences, and exploring fantasies and erotica. She also highlights the significance of mental and emotional preparation, including self-talk and relaxation techniques. The episode concludes with a challenge for listeners to identify ways to transition themselves into a sexual mindset. Takeaways Consent and empowerment are essential in one's sexuality.Engaging in activities that create closeness with your partner can help get you in the mood for sex.Thinking about past fulfilling sexual experiences and exploring fantasies and erotica can enhance sexual desire.Mental and emotional preparation, such as self-talk and relaxation techniques, can facilitate the transition to a sexual mindset.It is important to embrace and empower your sexuality. Chapters 00:00 Setting the Stage 03:48 Transitioning from Being Non-Sexual to Sexual 07:57 Activities to Get in the Mood 13:19 Mental and Emotional Preparation 15:09 Exploring Fantasies and Erotica ________________________________________________ 🔥 Learn How to use Sex Toys to Enhance your Pleasure. Toy Talk Sex Toy Course available at www.lovefilledlife.com/ToyTalk 🙂 Sign up for my free tips about strengthening love 💕, sex, and self-esteem at www.lovefilledlife.com 💕 CLICK HERE to submit a question or topic for an episode.

    19 min
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5
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33 Ratings

About

Dr. Heather England shares the real truth about midlife intimacy, love, and relationships. Together, we’ll explore these and other midlife topics, and empower you to create a life filled with meaning! This information is intended for educational and informational purposes only and is meant for your personal use to help with enhancing your relationship and sexual intimacy. It is not intended to serve as psychotherapy/counseling and should never be a substitute for medical advice. This information is to be used at your own risk based on your own judgment.

Information

  • Creator
    Heather England
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    40
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 Heather England
  • Show Website
    Great Sex Podcast