Spilt: A Podcast with Charlene and Tonya

Tonya and Charlene
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Mental Health
  • Weekly

Welcome to "Spilt...a podcast" with Charlene and Tonya. This podcast is about two friends, who realized we're kindred spirits, sharing authentic life experiences related to our battles with depression and mental health struggles. Join us as we journey through decades of stuffing our issues down so no one would notice. Guess what? We spilt and maybe you're spilling, too. We will explore topics such as: guilt, self-doubt, effects of trauma, self-acceptance, and much more. Healing is not linear but is possible. Check out our new episodes releasing every Tuesday.

  1. 23h ago

    Episode 116: Voice Lessons: Learning to Trust What You Have to Say

    What happens when you’ve spent years believing your thoughts don’t matter—or that other people won’t value what you have to say? Finding your voice isn’t about becoming the loudest person in the room. It’s about trusting that your opinions, questions, needs, boundaries, and experiences deserve expression, even when your words aren’t perfect and someone may disagree. In this episode, Tonya and Charlene explore how we learn to silence ourselves, why speaking can feel risky, and the difference between having permission to talk and genuinely believing we will be heard. They discuss people-pleasing, overexplaining, fear of conflict, and the temptation to wait until we are completely certain before contributing. They also consider what happens when we speak clearly and still aren’t heard—because the value of using our voice cannot always be measured by another person’s response. Finding your voice doesn’t mean you’ll never tremble, second-guess yourself, or be misunderstood. Sometimes it means deciding that the trembling version of you still deserves to speak. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  2. Oct 20

    Episode 115: Reacting vs. Responding: Finding the Space Between Feeling and Action

    We can’t always control our first emotional reaction—but that first feeling doesn’t have to make every decision. When we feel criticized, dismissed, misunderstood, or overwhelmed, it’s easy to react before the thoughtful part of us catches up. We may become defensive, shut down, lash out, overexplain, or say something we later regret. Responding doesn’t mean ignoring the emotion or pretending to be calm. It means creating enough space to understand what we’re feeling and choose what happens next. In this episode, Tonya and Charlene talk about recognizing emotional triggers, separating present situations from older wounds, and what can happen inside the pause between feeling and action. They also explore the difference between regulating and suppressing emotions, when taking time becomes avoidance, and how to repair a conversation when we don’t respond as well as we hoped. Growth doesn’t mean reactions never happen. Sometimes it means recognizing them sooner, taking responsibility, and finding our way back. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  3. Oct 6

    Episode 114: Why the Negative Feels Louder

    Why can one criticism outweigh ten compliments? Why can one frustrating moment convince us the entire day was terrible? And why do we sometimes leave a negative conversation feeling heavier than when it began? Our minds naturally notice and give greater weight to negative experiences—a tendency known as negativity bias. While it can help us recognize problems and potential threats, it can also distort how we view ourselves, other people, and our lives. In this episode, Tonya and Charlene explore the effects of negative self-talk, constant complaining, catastrophizing, and absorbing the negativity of the people around us. They discuss the difference between validating genuine pain and feeding a hopeless spiral, how to protect our emotional energy, and why developing perspective isn’t the same as forcing positivity. What we notice first doesn’t have to become the whole story. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  4. Sep 22

    Episode 113: Who Told You?

    Who made you believe you weren’t capable, worthy, important, lovable, or enough? Sometimes those words were spoken outright. Other times, the message came through criticism, comparison, rejection, or how we were treated. Over time, someone else’s voice can become an inner dialogue that we might keep repeating long after they’ve stopped. In this episode, Tonya and Charlene talk about where our self-beliefs come from, how they shape our decisions, and why it’s worth questioning who we’ve allowed to define us. They dive into separating helpful feedback from judgments about our value, noticing evidence that challenges old beliefs, and deciding which voices get to influence the life we’re building today. Not every belief we carry started with us—and not all of them deserve to come along for the journey ahead. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  5. Sep 15

    Episode 112: The Beautiful Pieces of You

    When life changes us, healing doesn’t always mean returning to who we were before. Sometimes it means gathering what remains—our experiences, relationships, lessons, faith, courage, and even our tender places—and creating something new. In this episode, Tonya and Charlene explore the idea of life as a mosaic. They talk about grieving former versions of ourselves, deciding which pieces of the past belong in the life we’re building, and recognizing what has quietly held us together along the way. The painful things that happened to us were not beautiful and did not need to happen. The beauty belongs to the person who gathered the pieces, gave them new meaning, and continued becoming. Maybe wholeness was never supposed to mean untouched. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  6. Sep 8

    Episode 111: When Life Doesn't Ask Permission

    We can make plans, work on ourselves, and finally feel ready for a new season—then life changes everything without asking permission. In the Season 7 premiere of Spilt, Tonya and Charlene share how unexpected expenses, caregiving, family concerns, changing roles, and disrupted plans reshaped the summers they imagined. They talk about the cumulative weight of “one more thing,” the difference between control and influence, and what purposeful living looks like when life refuses to follow the plan. Because living forward isn’t about controlling what happens next. It’s about learning how to meet the life we actually have—with honesty, grace, and room for both the hard and hopeful things. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  7. May 19

    Episode 110: Reflections on Growing Through It (Part 6)

    This season, we explored what it means to grow through life instead of avoiding it. From processing emotions and overthinking to self-worth, core lies, intuition, healing patterns, emotional weight, and honoring our energy—we spent this season learning how awareness changes the way we move through the world. In this finale episode, we reflect on the biggest lessons from Season 6 and what growth has looked like for us personally. We talk about the reality of change, the importance of self-acceptance, and why meaningful growth isn’t about perfection—it’s about awareness, intention, and learning to respond differently over time. Growth is rarely dramatic. Most of the time, it happens quietly in the choices we make every day. Part of our Growing Through It season, this episode is a reminder that healing is ongoing, awareness matters, and you are allowed to grow without demanding perfection from yourself. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

  8. May 12

    Episode 109: Now What? The Season of True Growth

    What happens after you recognize your patterns, your “mountain,” or the core beliefs you’ve been carrying? In this episode, we explore what real growth actually looks like after the moment of awareness. We talk about why change is often slower than we expect, what it means to live in the “in-between” space, and how growth shows up in small, everyday choices rather than dramatic transformation. Part of our Season 6 theme, Growing Through It, this conversation is a reminder that awareness is just the beginning—and that meaningful change happens through patience, consistency, and self-compassion. Email us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠mailto:spilt.apodcast@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ if you have comments, questions, or ideas about future episodes. Be sure to follow, rate, and review to stay informed about future episodes. You can find us on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/spilt.apodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/spilt.podcast/ Disclaimer: The views expressed are solely those of the hosts and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.

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About

Welcome to "Spilt...a podcast" with Charlene and Tonya. This podcast is about two friends, who realized we're kindred spirits, sharing authentic life experiences related to our battles with depression and mental health struggles. Join us as we journey through decades of stuffing our issues down so no one would notice. Guess what? We spilt and maybe you're spilling, too. We will explore topics such as: guilt, self-doubt, effects of trauma, self-acceptance, and much more. Healing is not linear but is possible. Check out our new episodes releasing every Tuesday.

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