This week on Pastors Unfiltered, Tony and Pastor Brandon sit down with Dave Nelson, Lead Pastor of Timberlake Church, for an incredibly honest conversation about ministry, leadership, anxiety, burnout, marriage, and what happens when everything you’ve built suddenly feels like it’s falling apart. Dave shares how he sensed a call to ministry as a teenager, traveled with a speaker at just 15 years old, eventually planted a church in Wisconsin, and watched that church grow rapidly. After 15 years of pastoring, however, a season of instability hit. The church lost its meeting location, attendance and giving dropped, his family was going through major challenges, and the pressure began affecting every area of his life. Dave opens up about reaching a point of complete burnout, losing confidence in himself as a leader, struggling with anxiety, and watching that stress spill over into his marriage. He shares the moment his wife left the house during an argument, the church leaders who confronted him with love, and the counseling experience that became a turning point for both his marriage and his health. Brandon also shares his own experience with anxiety and burnout, and the conversation turns toward why pastors often feel pressure to appear strong, why leaders need people who will tell them the truth, and what healthy rhythms can look like after walking through burnout. Dave shares how hiking, friendships, counseling, and reducing his preaching schedule have helped him recognize warning signs before they become another crisis. They also wrestle with vulnerability in leadership. How honest should a pastor be with their church? Can people follow a leader who admits they’re struggling? And what does it look like to lead authentically without pretending everything is okay? And before all of that, Tony and Brandon somehow find time to talk about church buildings becoming coffee shops, AI taking over the world, Harvard classes, Seattle politics, a potential trip to the White House, Raiders football, and why the Pastors Unfiltered puppet may already be retired. Timestamps 0:00 Welcome to Pastors Unfiltered 0:32 Raiders, Seahawks & Brandon’s New Church Admin 1:43 Revival Weekend in Seattle 2:23 Pastor Di Talks Herself Out of a Speaking Gig 3:30 Leaving Church Refreshed 4:07 The Seattle Church Building Drama 5:19 Losing Church Buildings in Western Washington 6:03 Doom Scrolling & Churches Becoming Coffee Shops 7:09 Why Churches Won’t Sell Buildings to Other Churches 8:10 AI, Technology & the Church 9:17 Brandon’s Upcoming Prayer Trip 10:05 Brandon Goes to Harvard… Kind Of 11:03 AI Pastors & the Future of Ministry 12:19 Terminator, Skynet & Seattle Politics 14:14 Tony’s Potential White House Opportunity 15:49 Becoming Known for One Issue 17:02 Introducing Dave Nelson 18:39 What Does Timberlake Mean? 19:15 Timberlake’s Three Campuses 19:34 Dave’s Family 20:38 Feeling Called to Ministry at 15 21:08 Traveling With a Pastor as a Teenager 21:45 Preaching at 17 Years Old 22:56 From Wisconsin to Ministry School 23:45 Early Ministry Salaries 24:38 Planting a Church in Wisconsin 25:08 Dave’s Connection to Timberlake 27:02 Launching With 623 People 27:27 Reaching 1,000 in the First Year 28:09 Growing a Church to 1,500 28:31 When Everything Started Falling Apart 29:17 Attendance & Giving Collapse 29:41 “I Felt Like a Loser” 30:02 Burnout Starts Affecting Everything 30:25 When You Can’t Even Preach 31:03 “It’s a Fire Shut Up in My Bones” 31:21 The Importance of Momentum in Church Planting 32:10 Family Crisis on Top of Ministry Crisis 32:53 Dave & Brandon Discover Their Shared Anxiety Stories 33:14 Pastors Struggle Too 34:12 When Preaching Triggers Anxiety 35:37 Walking Back Into the Hardest Season 36:26 Losing Confidence as a Leader 37:03 Stress Begins Affecting Dave’s Marriage 37:41 Dave Opens Up About His Behavior at Home 38:24 The Night His Wife Said “I’m Done” 38:58 Showing Up to Church the Next Morning 39:17 “We Don’t Judge You” 39:38 “You Need Help” 40:15 The Counseling Trip That Changed Everything 41:08 Facing the Things He Had Said 41:54 Learning Better Habits 42:21 Finding Jesus in the Darkest Moment 43:22 Healing Wasn’t Instant 43:39 “Our Marriage Is the Best It’s Ever Been” 44:06 How Long Did It Take to Feel Normal Again? 44:30 “We Want a Healthy Pastor” 44:47 The Phone Call That Changed Dave’s Perspective 45:46 “Your Marriage Would Be a Disaster Too” 46:17 Support Without Excusing the Behavior 47:00 Why Don’t Pastors Talk About Anxiety? 47:41 Thinking You’ll Never Lead the Same Again 48:25 Brandon Finds His Confidence Again During COVID 49:02 Recognizing Anxiety Triggers 49:48 Brandon’s Mandatory Month Off 50:58 Dave’s Healthy Rhythms 51:18 Preaching Only 60% of the Year 52:13 Telling the Church You’re Burned Out 52:49 How Vulnerable Should a Pastor Be? 53:07 Brandon’s Experience Sharing His Anxiety Story 53:32 Refusing to Fake Leadership 54:31 Vulnerability vs. Perceived Strength 55:16 The Pastor as the Hero 55:44 Being Completely Yourself 56:20 “How Do You Know God Is Speaking?” 56:54 Ministry in the Seattle Area 57:43 The Three Questions 58:04 What Dave Is Listening To 58:46 What Dave Is Watching 59:26 What Dave Is Reading 1:00:05 Finding Fresh Vision 1:00:26 Tony’s Book on Prayer 1:01:02 The Puppet Almost Returns 1:01:30 Closing Thoughts 1:01:52 Jesus Is the Hope of the World
