Margs and Mindset

Barlyssa Lopez
  • 5.0 (5)
  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Barlyssa have been taking on life's challenges side by side, discovering what works and what doesn't. We're not just addressing past wounds, but also picking up handy skills and strategies along the way to steer our journey forward. We're convinced that no one should have to pilot through these experiences alone. With a common objective, we pondered the most impactful way to extend out support to women of color tackling generational traumas and experiences in solitude. It turned out that launching a podcast is the best conduit to build a supportive community that engages in raw, real and open dialogues that yield authentic growth. But, add tasty margaritas and some laughs for a good time because a good laugh can overcome more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than people realize.

  1. MAR 25

    Fired On Your Day Off

    Send us Fan Mail One Friday call. Boss, boss’s boss, HR. “Effective immediately, you no longer work here.” After 11 years in corporate America, Lyssa expects the kind of moment that wrecks your stomach and scrambles your future. Instead, a smile creeps in and the truth lands fast: she wasn’t going to quit, so the universe pushed her off the ledge. We unpack the real-time aftermath of becoming a full-time entrepreneur, including the part nobody warns you about: you can be “fine” and still not have processed it. Lyssa shares how she kept it together to record a podcast minutes after the firing, why privacy and professionalism mattered, and what it means to finally answer “Do you do this full time?” with a clear yes. We also talk about the limiting beliefs that keep smart, capable people stuck like the comfort of steady pay, the myth of “free money,” and the identity trap of being a high achiever who won’t let anyone down. Then we get practical about the nervous system shift: sleep changes, weekends feel different, vacations aren’t haunted by a laptop, and work-life balance stops being a theory. We reflect on scaling a small business, “working ourselves out of our jobs,” and how being surrounded by women entrepreneurs turns fear into momentum, especially when your people cheer for you instead of grieving the job. If you’re thinking about leaving your corporate job, starting a business, or stepping into a bigger season of abundance, this conversation will hit. Subscribe to the show, share it with a friend who needs a push, and leave a review. What would it take for you to finally choose yourself? Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    33 min

  2. MAR 18

    VIVA LAS VEGAS

    Send a text Vegas didn’t blur for us. It sharpened. We came home one day removed and already know we’re not the same people who boarded that plane. No partying fog, no boozy memory gaps just full-senses, wide-awake joy, awe, and a couple of moments that hit so deep we’re still processing them. We went to Las Vegas to celebrate a 37th birthday and finally see Jennifer Lopez live on March 6, after months of anticipation and a past tour that got canceled. The timing felt unreal, like everything lined up on purpose. Then the universe doubled down: a random pick for birthday breakfast turns into a stranger giving an eerily spot-on reading that cracks us open before 10 a.m. It becomes this reminder that the right trip at the right time can feel like confirmation, not coincidence. And then there’s the desert. First time seeing it and our brains basically short-circuit. Raw earth, naked mountains, sunsets that don’t look like they belong on the same planet as our everyday life. It sparks a bigger question about travel, curiosity, and how much of the world we’ve been taking for granted. Add in the Vegas food experience list (Hell’s Kitchen, Mon Ami Gabi, Jardin, Wolfgang Puck) and we’re forced to admit our standards and our mindset both leveled up. If you’ve been craving a reset, a girls trip idea, or a push to build “something to look forward to” into your life, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend you’d travel with, and leave a review with the place that changed you most. Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    33 min

  3. MAR 11

    Seared & Saccharum w/ Adrean Valerio

    Send us Fan Mail A pink-tinged marg, a splash of ginger beer, and a truth bomb: hospitality is the art of making people feel held. We sit down with Adrian of Seared and Sacrum—our go-to catering partner—to unpack how a women-led team builds unforgettable events through craft, care, and clear boundaries. From proper shake technique and why texture matters to edible storytelling that turns grazing tables into tiny worlds, Adrian shows how customization beats cookie-cutter, every time. Her journey runs from dive bars and distilleries to fine dining and craft cocktails, then into entrepreneurship sparked by a simple question: if mediocre men can launch businesses, why not us? We dive into the math and mindset of growth—hitting a 50-client cap on meal prep, deciding when to hire, and why culture outranks skill when you bring people aboard. Chef’s choice menus become a case study in saying yes wisely: lower costs, better quality, more magic. Not everyone will love it, and that’s the point—alignment over appeasement. We also get personal. Adrian works with endometriosis and designs her schedule around her cycle, naming what many women feel but rarely say: consistency is not a moral virtue. We talk motherhood, rest, and how permission creates better work. Anthony’s story—three years sober, shifting from “Guinness Tony” to Chef Anthony—highlights quiet leadership and food as a voice. Then we zoom out: the patriarchy’s fingerprints on hospitality, from witches who pioneered brewing and distilling to the power of “gossip” as community care. Aging comes into focus as an asset, not a flaw—moving from producing to mentoring, from proving to guiding. If you care about events that feel like you, about building a business without burning out, and about partnerships where values show up on the plate, you’ll feel at home here. Tap play, then tell us: what boundary are you claiming this year? If this resonated, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find the conversation. Meet Adrean: Adrean Valerio has worked in the hospitality industry since she was 15 and is the owner of Seared & Saccharum Catering alongside her husband, Anthony. She built her career around the belief that good food and genuine hospitality can bring people together in meaningful ways. She’s a mom to Leland, with a beloved dog named Walnut rounding out the household. When she’s not planning events, she’s usually reading or falling down the rabbit hole of a new hobby. Adrean is a staunch feminist and human rights advocate who cares deeply about community, family, and doing what she can to make the world around her a little better. If your’re anything like us, you’ll want to be friends with Adrean after this episode! You can follow her journey on Instagram: @searedandsaccharum Website: searedandsaccharum.com And if you're looking for delicious and healthy meal prep don't forget to our listeners get 50% off meal prep using code Margs50! Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    1h 15m

  4. MAR 4

    We Didn't Just Meet It We Exceeded

    Send us Fan Mail Sun on our faces, sand in our shoes, and a whole new standard for what family time can feel like. We just came back from a resort-and-ruins whirlwind and a cruise that forced us to unplug, and we’re talking about how travel rewired our kids’ expectations, our work rhythms, and our own sense of what a rich life looks like. From a first sip of bitter espresso to a virgin daiquiri on the beach, little moments sparked big conversations about taste, boundaries, and the kind of care we want our kids to expect from the world. Mexico gave us more than tan lines. A day in a Mayan community and at Chichen Itza hit like a reset button, reminding us why we leave home: to be changed. Then came the cruise—the kind of old-school hospitality that makes you feel remembered—plus a near disaster when we almost drove to the wrong port. With no service at sea, we actually had to be present, and it felt like a gift. We came home, cracked a champagne bottle tied to a very specific goal, and celebrated beating our event target in the shortest month of the year. Ritualizing wins turned momentum into a habit. All of that flowed into a bigger theme: this is the year of flow. Last year was discovery and surrender; this year we integrate. We’re choosing to put away the laptop when the family bucket needs filling, to trust that abundance expands when we stop gripping, and to let plans we made months ago finally land—like a Vegas trip lined up with a birthday and a JLo residency we’ve dreamed about since we were kids. We talk manifestation without fluff, the power of intentional planning, and why standards aren’t snobbery when they’re rooted in curiosity, care, and self-belief. Press play for travel stories, honest laughs, and practical takeaways you can use to build a life that celebrates as it grows—one goal bottle, one memory, one flow-state decision at a time. If this resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who needs a nudge to plan their next memory, and leave a review to help more listeners find us.

    39 min

  5. FEB 25

    Showing Up & Showing Up

    Send us Fan Mail What happens when you say yes without having any idea what you said yes to and walk into a house full of strangers with nothing but a weekend bag and an open heart? We did exactly that at a women’s goddess gathering and left with something rare: real friendship, a calmer nervous system, and a new standard for joy. This isn’t a recap of spa vibes; it’s the story of how cacao, Human Design, Reiki, tarot, and a private-chef dinner teamed up to make vulnerability feel safe—and fun. We start with the wobble: two lifelong “room kids” realizing they’re sharing a bedroom with someone new. Instead of bailing, we lean in. A cacao ceremony dissolves the small talk and invites real shares—the kind you usually save for a late-night phone call. From there, Human Design becomes our map. Side by side, we see how our energy works, why we click where we do, and how to give each other space where we don’t. It’s not a label; it’s a workflow for life and business that reduces friction and amplifies what’s already strong. Then comes the bodywork that changes everything. Reiki lands like a somatic exhale, releasing what words can’t touch. Tarot and a blazing phoenix goddess card give language to the same truth: it’s shedding season. We talk about burning down old roles—pleaser, over-doer, constant performer—and rebuilding with more play and less proving. And yes, we geek out on the food. A calm, intentional private chef turns meals into care, reminding us that real ingredients and presence taste like love. Grapes in salad, chimichurri on everything, and a flourless chocolate cake that lives rent-free in our minds. By the end, we’ve set up a “domino plan” for the month: a string of joyful commitments designed to keep the momentum going. The takeaway is simple and doable. Try the thing you wrote off. Revisit practices with a kinder lens. If it feeds you, keep it. If it doesn’t, release it without drama. This is an episode about sisterhood, spiritual awakening, practical self-care, and building community beyond business. If you felt the tug while reading this, hit play. Then subscribe, share with a friend who needs a courage nudge, and leave a review with one thing you’ll say yes to next. Your next domino is waiting. Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    43 min

  6. FEB 18

    Love Dump

    Send us Fan Mail What if your most enduring love story began with a teacher asking a fourth-grader to be a friend? We share the arc from that first yes to a Valentine’s Day reunion in seventh grade and the 28-year bond that followed—one built on unspoken rituals, trust without scorekeeping, and a village-first approach to love and life. No clichés, no tidy labels—just the real mechanics of a relationship that defies assumptions and still feels simple. We walk through how everyday gestures—one of us crafting the perfect margarita while the other dials in cameras and mics—become a part of our love language. That language powers everything: our personal lives, our parenting, and a business that runs on devotion expressed as structure. We unpack why we don’t ask one person to be every bucket and how a village model brings more stability, less jealousy, and a lot more joy. From navigating outside judgments to finding partners who honor our soulmate friendship, we show how consent, clarity, and care become our operating system. You’ll hear why chosen family can be a strategy as much as a sentiment, how planned joy turns into a season of celebration, and why the most efficient business process might be a deep breath with someone who knows your whole archive. This conversation invites you to rethink monogamy myths, redefine commitment, and design a life where love is abundant, logistics are thoughtful, and kids grow up surrounded by steady hands. If you’ve ever felt seen beyond words—or wanted to—this one’s for you. If the story resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who’s building their own village, and leave a review to help others find the show. Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    30 min

  7. FEB 11

    Materializing Emotion

    Send us Fan Mail What if wedding planning felt like love instead of noise? We share how a simple meal prep habit with Seared and Sacrum turned into a white glove partnership that raised our bar for every touchpoint—then fueled a bold experiment: a micro wedding expo built for intimacy, intention, and real conversation. We start with the everyday magic of great food showing up exactly when and how you need it, and the way that reliability reshaped our mindset for client care. We unpack how traditional expos overwhelm couples with crowds, sales pitches, and zero time to think. Our answer was to flip the format. Couples arrived on staggered schedules, walked through fully staged tables and a sweetheart setting, saw a pristine buffet before the first guest touched it, and then tasted dishes that matched the visual promise. Afterward, Adrean from Seared and Sacrum sat down one-on-one to demystify menus, logistics, and costs. The result wasn’t swag—it was trust. Along the way, we talk about luxury as intention, not price tag: slower pacing, thoughtful sequencing, and space to be heard. We get honest about the emotional stakes too. People cried. Hugs happened. Stories surfaced. That’s the heart of micro weddings—materializing emotion in a room through design choices that reflect a couple’s history and hopes. We also share how breathwork helped us integrate the win instead of sprinting past it, and how our past roles quietly trained us to orchestrate moments that land with a visceral “oh.” If you’re curious about micro weddings, curated tastings, experiential design, or how to build community-first events in Rochester, this one is for you. Subscribe, share with a friend who’s planning, and leave a review with your dream guest count so we can tailor future experiences. Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    31 min

  8. FEB 4

    Unbecoming and Becoming w/ Sarah Napoli

    Send us Fan Mail A margarita, a mic, and a moment of truth: that’s where our conversation with leadership coach and community-builder Sarah Napoli really begins. Sarah opens up about the “pretzel twist” of corporate life—how chasing targets and fitting into someone else’s values can tighten you into a smaller version of yourself—and the surprising freedom that came when she loosened her grip on timelines and held the vision instead. Meet Sarah: With over 25 years of leadership experience across retail, beauty, med-tech, and healthcare, Sarah has always been driven by more than results. She found her greatest fulfillment in developing people - mentoring leaders, building culture, and helping others step into their potential. Today, she is a personal and professional leadership coach, supporting individuals, leaders, and teams who are ready to evolve. Her work centers on creating space for growth and empowering people to lead with clarity, confidence, heart, and strategy. We trace Sarah’s arc from retail floors to multi-unit leadership and into coaching, where she now supports women founders and executives through clear audits, belief work, and culture change that actually sticks. She shares how rejection becomes redirection, why the best leaders stand with one foot in vision and one in operations, and how empowerment beats push tactics when you want results that last.  Expect practical tools: a simple life audit to spot misalignment, future-self thinking to guide habits, and the power of “borrowed belief” when fear blocks the first step. Along the way, we talk consistency over intensity, health choices that serve you decades from now, and the underrated celebration of a deep breath to integrate wins. If you’ve felt wound tight by a role, a title, or a timeline, this conversation offers language, frameworks, and community to help you uncurl. You’ll leave with mantras worth screenshotting, questions that sharpen your next move, and a reminder that unbecoming and becoming can happen at the same time.  Subscribe, share this with a friend who’s on the edge of a big move, and leave a review with your top takeaway—what’s one grip you’re ready to loosen this week? If your’re anything like us, you’ll want to be friends with Sarah after this episode! You can follow her journey on Instagram: @sarahnapoli. Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

    41 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

Barlyssa have been taking on life's challenges side by side, discovering what works and what doesn't. We're not just addressing past wounds, but also picking up handy skills and strategies along the way to steer our journey forward. We're convinced that no one should have to pilot through these experiences alone. With a common objective, we pondered the most impactful way to extend out support to women of color tackling generational traumas and experiences in solitude. It turned out that launching a podcast is the best conduit to build a supportive community that engages in raw, real and open dialogues that yield authentic growth. But, add tasty margaritas and some laughs for a good time because a good laugh can overcome more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than people realize.

Information

  • Creator
    Barlyssa Lopez
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    130
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Margs and Mindset
  • Show Website
    Margs and Mindset