Clutch My Pearls

Clutch My Pearls
  • 4.8 (195)
  • COMEDY
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

Clutch My Pearls is a podcast where the host, Emily, doesn't read erotic fiction and her two friends, Barbara and Vanessa, tell her all about their favorite smut! Join them every Tuesday as they dive into a different raunchy read and find out if Emily clutches her pearls! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  1. 120 - Cupid's Peak

    JAN 27

    120 - Cupid's Peak

    Come get “Mathed Up” with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Cupid’s Peak” by Lee Jacquot! This is a Holinight novella, a series first seen in “Hollow’s Grove” way back in Episode 3! In this book, we meet Mia, a smart and busy finance babe who has no time to meet anyone new! She even schedules “appointments”with her Big Purp! Thankfully her sister Eleni plays Cupid and sets up Mia with her former crush Eli! Eli is a NHL superstar now, but Mia remembers him as her tutoring student who was just as adorkable as her! Can a night atop Cupid’s Peak spark something more? Scoot 45° over in your booth, use PEMDAS to show your work, and feel around under the table to find out for yourself! Yum! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive ad-free and bonus episodes Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 4m
  2. 119 - Saving The Rain

    JAN 20

    119 - Saving The Rain

    Come ride bareback with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Saving The Rain” by Elliott Rose! It’s from the Crimson Ridge series, previously shared by Vanessa in episode 79 and by Emily in episode 105! In book four, Kayce Wilder gets injured in a bull riding competition, and his only cure is the forbidden love of his rival bull rider…who happens to be his step brother?! Zeke Rainer, whom we have to call him Raine, comes to the ranch to cover Kayce’s duties, but he ends up covering way more than that! With Raine’s help, Kayce has a chance to heal and to come into his own (jeans). Take a bath, slip and slide across the bench seat of a truck, and tune in! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 7m
  3. 118 - Cursebound

    JAN 13

    118 - Cursebound

    Come hunt vampires with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Cursebound” by Sadie Kincaid and LJ Morrow! Book one in the Curse of Blood series introduces us to the vampire hunter Rosa Capelli! Rosa isn’t like the other vampire hunters, she is a Seer that takes out all the bad vampires, just like Tom Cruise in Minority Report! Rosa didn’t *see* Luca Da Firenze, the super hot and super old (400!) vampire mafia capo, coming into her life, but he’s here and she can’t escape him, not that she would want to! Their bond might be that of soulmates (hello silver eye rings!), but it comes at a cost. Get your grinch fingers, squirt your water bottle, and serve your beef hot because you’re in danger girl! Twilight-run your way to tuning in!  New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 13m
  4. 117 - Why Cheese?

    JAN 6

    117 - Why Cheese?

    Come cut the cheese with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Why Cheese?” by Ellen Mint! After many tags and requests for this book to be presented, Vanessa delivered! We follow Violette as she inherits her great uncle’s cheese shop, but the real story is hidden in the basement: a magical chest containing four different cheeses. These cheeses aren’t like the cheeses, these turn into sexy men at night! Cheddy, Roq, Cam, and Brie take an immediate liking to Violette, so they decide to go into business together to save the cheese shop. They also do a lot of other things, sometimes all together, sometimes just a few of them, and sometimes in public! Choo Choo! All aboard the Cheddy train! This episode had the girls kicking their little feet, flipping the camera all around the studio, and learning all about Barbara’s cheese aversion! And The Girls tie Vanessa down to satisfy those that have been requesting “Heated Rivalry” - Vanessa will be presenting it on our Patreon for the bonus episode available on the last Thursday of the month! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    58 min
  5. 116 - Squeak

    12/30/2025

    116 - Squeak

    Come beef at the Zoo with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Squeak” by Vera Valentine! When friends Sebastian and Keane fall into the grips of a fortune teller’s curse, they worry their swimsuit areas will stay smooth and Ken-like forever. One day, the boys try blowing in each other’s mouths and realize it makes them grow down there. But their areas are… a balloon? With a knot on the end? Is this omegaverse? Yes! Although Seb and Keane enjoy each other plenty, an artsy woman named Poppy starts to sketch herself into their world. As the balloons grow in size and the three of them form a connection, will their bond be enough to free the boys from their curse? Start some beef, think about blowing into your friend’s mouth, and listen now before the new year! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    56 min
  6. 115 - He Sees You When You're Sleeping

    12/23/2025

    115 - He Sees You When You're Sleeping

    Come unwrap your Christmas present with The Girls! It’s another episode of our Blind Draw Christmas Pick ‘Ems Event and Vanessa is up! She presents “He Sees You When You’re Sleeping” by Alta Hensley, a book chosen just for her by Emily (and some of our loyal Patrons!) As soon as hottie firefighter Jack meets jewelry influencer Chloe, he’s obsessed! Is he a stalker? There’s no way to know! When Jack discovers Chloe has a secret online persona and tons of fans that love the way she “cybers,” he comes into her DMs and then he comes into her…you know what. With morally gray characters, intriguing (brand new!) trigger warnings, and plenty of reminders that it’s just a book, this really is the perfect gift for Vanessa! New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1 hr
  7. 114 - Merry Christmas You Filthy Animal

    12/16/2025

    114 - Merry Christmas You Filthy Animal

    Come get sticky with The Girls! This week Barbara is presenting “Merry Christmas You Filthy Animal” by Meghan Quinn. The Girls are back in Christmas Kringle Town from Episode 61! After her year-round Christmas Store went out of business, our FMC Betty comes to Kringle Town to help her uncle start up a rival Christmas Tree farm! When Betty meets Atlas (who also goes by Max..?) she feels a connection with him before she realizes he is part of the family that owns the other Christmas tree farm! Hijinks ensue, because Atlas/Max has been left home alone after his family went to Europe without him! Like the movie! This episode features an astrology update, cherry cordials, counter top 69, and every possible “Home Alone” reference, including a tarantula!  New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 12m
  8. 113 - Big Nick Energy

    12/09/2025

    113 - Big Nick Energy

    Come consent to Christmas with The Girls! This week Vanessa is presenting “Big Nick Energy” by Morgan Elizabeth! The Girls are revisiting the Seasons of Revenge Series they first dipped into from episode 8 “‘Tis The Season For Revenge!” When Shae is celebrating her first Christmas as a single mom to her two little girls, she is trying to make it special. When Nickolas Finch (who of course owns a Christmas Tree farm) comes into Shae’s life, he too wants to make the Christmas special for the little girls, and for Shae! This insta-love holiday book will have you dancing like a sugar plum, craving buttered noodles and maybe even allowing an Elf on The Shelf on your property!  New Episodes out every Tuesday! Join our Patreon to receive early, ad- free (and bonus!) episodes and more! Patreon.com/ClutchMyPearlsPod  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Watch the video version of this podcast on our YouTube channel!  Follow @ClutchMyPearlsPod on TikTok, Twitter, Instagram and GoodReads!  We have *NEW* MERCH go to ClutchMyPearlsPod.com to check it out! Do you have a smut recommendation for the girls? Send an email to: ClutchMyPearlsPod@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    1h 4m
See All (120)

4.8
out of 5
195 Ratings

About

Clutch My Pearls is a podcast where the host, Emily, doesn't read erotic fiction and her two friends, Barbara and Vanessa, tell her all about their favorite smut! Join them every Tuesday as they dive into a different raunchy read and find out if Emily clutches her pearls! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Information

  • Creator
    Clutch My Pearls
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    120
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2023
  • Show Website
    Clutch My Pearls

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