I Wish You Knew

Adam Lane Smith & Andrey Korikov

Join the duo, Andrey Korikov, and Adam Lane Smith The Attachment Specialist, as they cut through the noise with bold, unfiltered discussions on love, connection, and relationships. From questions about love, psychology, and relationships to discussing the latest shifts in the culture and media, they’ll cover it all. If you’re ready for a podcast that’s as insightful and real as it gets—buckle up and get ready to rethink everything you thought you knew about relationships!

  1. Why Modern Parenting Is Creating a Mental Health Crisis (ft. Erica Komisar)

    3D AGO

    Why Modern Parenting Is Creating a Mental Health Crisis (ft. Erica Komisar)

    🚨 LOVE FOR LIFE: VALENTINE’S 2026 — SALE 🚨  Are you working on yourself or building love together as a couple? This is for anyone ready to break unhealthy attachment patterns, build emotional security, and create a foundation for love that feels safe, connected, and built to last. 👉 https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/vale... Children are born neurologically and emotionally fragile. They're born feeling frightened and unsafe. And somewhere along the way, we decided that was someone else's problem to solve. Erica Komisar joins Adam Lane Smith for a conversation about what we've lost: the understanding that the first three years of a child's life shape everything that comes after. In this video:  → Why 85% of your child's social-emotional brain develops before age three  → The attachment foundation that determines mental health for life  → How we told women that careers matter more than shaping the next generation  → What chronic absence does to a child's nervous system (and why we're medicating the result)  → The feminist message that backfired: "Women should be more like men"  → Why 60% of mothers would stay home if they had financial and emotional support  → The father's role: vasopressin, protection, play, and teaching risk  → How fatherlessness connects to the behavioral crisis in young boys  → The deathbed question: who will be holding your hand when you die?  → Why sibling rivalry spikes when parents aren't present enough  → The CEO/CFO model of marriage: equal value, different specialization  → How wives can pull workaholic husbands back into the family ABOUT ERICA KOMISAR: Erica Komisar is a psychoanalyst, parent guidance expert, and author of "Being There: Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters." Her new book on raising healthy children through divorce releases March 2026. 🔗 Erica's Website: komisar.com  🔗 Attachment Circles (Nonprofit): attachmentcircles.org 🔗 Instagram: @ericakommisar 📚 WORK WITH ME 🫂 RELATIONSHIP MASTERY INTENSIVE April 23–26, 2026 | San Diego, California 3 days of real skill-building with people who understand exactly what you're going through. Apply here: https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?ut... 💬 1:1 COACHING Work directly with my team: https://adamlanesmith.com/private-coa... 📋 FREE ATTACHMENT QUIZ Find out your attachment style in under 5 minutes: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-... 📬 NEWSLETTER Get weekly insights on attachment patterns: https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter

    1h 4m
  2. Why Dating Is A Failed Concept

    JAN 30

    Why Dating Is A Failed Concept

    Why is dating broken?  Why are young men flooding back to church?  In this conversation, I sit down with Patrick Coffin: Catholic broadcaster, close-up magician, and host of The Patrick Coffin Show. We go deep on the real reasons relationships are falling apart: and it goes back further than you think. We cover:  → Why dating is a failed concept (and what humans actually need)  → The 3 "divorces" that broke Western civilization  → How your image of God shapes your attachment style  → Why empaths and narcissists can't stop finding each other  → The difference between emotional permanence and emotional impermanence  → What the Traditional Latin Mass has to do with secure attachment  → Why "spiritual but not religious" is code for "I don't want to be challenged"  → The biochemistry of feeling loved (oxytocin, vasopressin, and cortisol)  → How to repair after conflict: the skill most families lost 120 years ago Plus: Patrick performs a live magic trick that lands. This is the intersection of faith, neuroscience, and attachment theory: the stuff that actually changes how you bond. 🔗 RESOURCES MENTIONED: Patrick Coffin's Podcast: https://patrickcoffin.media  True North Community: https://patrickcoffin.media 📚 WORK WITH ME: 🫂 RELATIONSHIP MASTERY INTENSIVE April 23–26, 2026 | San Diego, California 3 days of real skill-building with people who understand exactly what you're going through. Apply here: https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=retreat 💬 1:1 COACHING Work directly with my team: https://adamlanesmith.com/private-coaching/ 📋 FREE ATTACHMENT QUIZ Find out your attachment style in under 5 minutes: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/ 📬 NEWSLETTER Get weekly insights on attachment patterns: https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/ 🎙️ ABOUT THIS CHANNEL: I'm Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist. I've spent 16 years helping people understand how their brain learned to bond: and how to change it. I work with anxious, avoidant, and disorganized attachment styles to build secure relationships that actually last. Subscribe for weekly videos on attachment, relationships, and the psychology of connection.

    1h 20m
  3. Schedule Your Feelings. Here's Why.

    JAN 23

    Schedule Your Feelings. Here's Why.

    Dr. Chris Lee opens with the truth most people avoid: men are dying from loneliness.  In this conversation, Adam Lane Smith and Dr. Chris Lee break down the science of emotional regulation, why your amygdala hallucinates up to 340% more threats if you have insecure attachment, and why scheduling your feelings might be the most counterintuitive (and effective) thing you ever do. About Dr. Chris Lee: Neuroscience researcher, consultant, father, homeschool parent. Lost his father to suicide at 22, had his daughter two weeks later. Built his career understanding why men suffer in silence and how to break the pattern. 🔗 Instagram: @drchrislee  🔗 Website: drchrislee.com About Adam Lane Smith: The Attachment Specialist. 17 years married. Six children (number six on the way). Helping one billion people become securely attached. 🔗 RESOURCES: 🫂 RELATIONSHIP MASTERY INTENSIVE April 23–26, 2026 | San Diego, California 3 days of real skill-building with people who understand exactly what you're going through. Apply here: https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=retreat 📋 FREE ATTACHMENT QUIZ  Find out your attachment style in under 5 minutes: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/ 📬 NEWSLETTER Get weekly insights on attachment patterns: https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/ #mentalhealth #mensmentalhealth #suicide #loneliness #attachment #emotionalintelligence #stressmanagement #cortisol #relationships #healing

    1h 13m
  4. The Science of Why Men Cheat (And How to Stop)

    JAN 16

    The Science of Why Men Cheat (And How to Stop)

    New Year's Sale. Up to 40% Off All Programs https://bundle.adamlanesmith.com/nynm?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=nyny RELATIONSHIP MASTERY INTENSIVE 2026 April 23 to 26 | San Diego, California https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=retreat 🔗 Attachment Assessment: Dr. Orion Taraban returns to break down what most relationship advice gets completely wrong. We dive into the neurochemistry behind attraction and commitment: dopamine, oxytocin, vasopressin, cortisol; and why chasing "good feelings" is destroying modern relationships. Adam reveals the Secure Loyalty Equation he and Andrey developed, explaining why purpose and shared challenges create bonds that last decades. We cover:  → Why "love bombing" actually works (and what that reveals)  → The 58 to 63 day window for rewiring attachment patterns  → What the prairie vole experiments teach us about human monogamy  → Building a 1000 year family legacy vs. optimizing for immediate happiness  → The spiritual case for non;attachment in relationships 🔗 Dr. Taraban's new book Starry Night: https://amzn.to/4sGcqOY Find him: youtube.com/@OrionTaraban About Adam Lane Smith: Attachment specialist. 17 years married. Author and coach helping one billion people become securely attached. 🔗 Website: adamlanesmith.com 🔗 Attachment Assessment: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/ 🔗 Attachment Repair Program: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/ 🔗 Retreat: https://adamlanesmith.com/retreat/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=retreat 🔗 New Year's Sale: Uutm_source=youtube&utm_medium=nynybundle.adamlanesmith.com/nynm?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=nyny

    1h 38m
  5. The Single Most Important Decision a Man Will Make

    12/29/2025

    The Single Most Important Decision a Man Will Make

    What if choosing the right partner is the most important decision a man makes? Schafer explains how leadership, respect, and healthy dynamics create attraction, loyalty, and lasting partnership. Topics Covered: 👉 Why choosing a wife is the most important decision in a man’s life 👉 The hidden damage caused by “mothering” and nagging dynamics 👉 How positive reinforcement builds loyalty and emotional safety 👉 The Executive Partner model and how to challenge without conflict 👉 Treating marriage like a team instead of a battleground 👉 Why becoming a high-value man matters more than “finding” the right woman 👉 How vision, legacy, and future generations motivate discipline 👉 The biochemical bonding effects of solving problems together 👉 A practical nervous system reset that strengthens connection during stress If you enjoyed watching this episode, you might love 'Dr. Orion Taraban: Why Modern Men Are Failing at Intimacy'. Watch here: https://youtu.be/rYdzdGReDqg Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/@AttachmentAdam  Work with Adam Lane Smith, The Attachment Specialist: 1- https://adamlanesmith.com/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  2- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/how-to-love-an-avoidant-man/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  3- https://adamlanesmith.com/product/the-attachment-bootcamp/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  4- https://adamlanesmith.com/work-with-me/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  5- https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-repair/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Want to learn your attachment style, and sign up for Adam's weekly newsletter? Click the link below to receive your copy and sign up now. https://adamlanesmith.com/newsletter-signup/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  If you want to know your attachment style , take our free attachment quiz: https://adamlanesmith.com/attachment-assessment/?utm_source=youtube.com&utm_medium=social  Connect with Adam on your second preferred platform: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro  X: https://twitter.com/adamlanesmith  Threads: https://www.threads.com/@attachmentadam  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AdamLaneSmith/  I Wish You Knew Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCh_uRUnpQwNZb_WG76TxTTw?sub_confirmation=1 Adam Schafer: IG: https://www.instagram.com/mindpumpadam/ Website: https://www.mindpumpmedia.com/ Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/ ⁨@MindPumpShow⁩   #marriageadvice #relationshipgrowth #highvalueman

    1h 15m
4.8
out of 5
49 Ratings

About

Join the duo, Andrey Korikov, and Adam Lane Smith The Attachment Specialist, as they cut through the noise with bold, unfiltered discussions on love, connection, and relationships. From questions about love, psychology, and relationships to discussing the latest shifts in the culture and media, they’ll cover it all. If you’re ready for a podcast that’s as insightful and real as it gets—buckle up and get ready to rethink everything you thought you knew about relationships!

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