Avoidance and Control

Monique Gomez
  • 5.0 (10)
  • Mental Health
  • Weekly

Are you avoiding places and people to feel more comfortable? Welcome to the Avoidance and Control Podcast, together we will uncover these common reactions of our nervous system and learn to use them to our advantage to get our voices heard and needs met. Join me as we step out of society's view of health and focus on skills over symptoms. Host Monique Gomez former mental health clinician turned Trauma and Resilience Life Coach, will simplify the science to help you navigate being a human with reactions, tools to support, and how her coaching to reach compassion beyond your imagination.

  1. 2d ago

    Beyond The Diagnosis: Understanding Bipolar with Jeremy Davis

    What if understanding your mental health starts with recognizing how you think? Author Jeremy Davis joins us to explore bipolar, internal personas, trauma, and tools for everyone. In This Episode: Personas are not the same as Multiple Personality DisorderDon't need a Diagnosis to Practice these SkillsSeriousness of Diagnosing and treatment for people with BipolarMental Health Resources in Show Notes Jeremy M. Davis grew up in Mount Vernon, Washington, graduated magna cum laude in Computer Science, and built a software engineering career in Silicon Valley before settling in North Carolina, where he spent years believing the chaos in his mind was just the cost of ambition. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2012, he spent the next decade rebuilding through the adoption of his sister’s three children, the end of his first marriage, long-term disability, ECT treatment, and a second chance at life with his wife, Heather. A mixed-state episode in 2026 nearly cost him that, and the fact that it didn’t says everything. Jeremy is not a clinician but someone who has lived this from the inside, and he writes the way he built software: methodically, honestly, and with zero tolerance for code that lies about what it actually does. The Faces of Bipolar is his first book. Jeremy's Links: Resources https://thefacesofbipolar.com/resources/ Buy The Faces of Bipolar (and Workbook) https://buy.thefacesofbipolar.com Book Website https://www.thefacesofbipolar.com Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/thefacesofbipolar Moniques Links: How to Seek Help (Diagnosis and Treatment) https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/find-help Responsibility Pie (From Book- Mind Over Mood) https://content.app-sources.com/s/66784056449848413/uploads/PDFS/Responsibility_Pie-7392629.pdf What is Internal Family Systems Therapy? https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapy-types/internal-family-systems-therapy Intro Coaching Session with Monique https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Other Book Recommendations: Companion Workbook by Jeremy Davis https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0HLDS9CMC?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_9N8F66J44F3948MTBENH&bestFormat=true An Unquiet Mind https://a.co/d/0e0R2ebE Not The Chancla: How Awareness of Our History and Trauma Create Compassion to Rewrite Our Future https://a.co/d/0dk6fd3d Thank you for listening

  2. Oct 26

    Why You Can't Just Calm Down

    What if the reason you keep spiraling isn't simply that you're feeling too much? What if your body is responding to a perceived threat, your mind is trying to make sense of it, and your beliefs are turning uncertainty into certainty? In this episode we review Education from Season 1, discuss how Safety and Capacity need to be the floor boards for befriending your nervous system and tools that simmer down your spiral. Why its hard to practice skills to self regulate Spiral Brain, Anxiety Window and Survival Mode are the sameExpand your capacity for fear with acknowledging truthsBody Based Regulation Tools Episodes in This Episode: What is Trauma? https://open.spotify.com/episode/1lVg9wDuD2INKHdubzb87o?si=Gqy6ySCWQkO-xKCwkXQx1Q https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/avoidance-and-control/id1717846722?i=1000638913987 The Window of Tolerance https://open.spotify.com/episode/4mTmugoL6wNMrlQ8FFrrfS?si=RvUKfkfVTOCqhJitw5MnkA https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/avoidance-and-control/id1717846722?i=1000641681684 Image Resources from This Episode (Window of Tolerance, Tools for Avoidance, Tools for Control) https://dtheal.org/mh-resources#imageresources Intro Coaching Session: https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session My Book https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BMNVVWWS?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_A47JWXQ4SN1A2GQKY4HB&bestFormat=true Low Ticket and Free Groups https://www.eventbrite.com/o/47342140343

  3. Oct 19

    The Necessary Work of Rage & Grief with Jana Bryant

    You cannot come to calm when your body is raging or trying to grief. Peace doesn’t come from escaping the messiness of being human. It comes from learning to stay present with what hurts without turning pain into a diagnosis, an assumption, a punishment, or a spiritual bypass. You cannot bypass your way out of the grief of being human. You can reframe it, diagnose it, spiritualize it, or stay silent about it. But unprocessed pain doesn't always disappear. Sometimes it becomes the distance between you and the people you love. Jana is a Human Systems Strategist, former pastor, founder of Permission to Be, and host of Up Shift’s Creek. Her work sits at the intersection of identity, relationships, religious conditioning, discernment, and emotional integration, helping people recognize the invisible patterns shaping their lives so they can move beyond understanding and begin living differently. She is also the creator of the RAAGD™ Framework and Reality Distortion Index™. Jana Links: website www.permissiontobe.org Podcast https://www.youtube.com/@UpShiftsCreek Reality Distortion Index https://stan.store/JanaBryant/p/reality-distortion-index Moniques Links https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Free and low ticket events https://www.eventbrite.com/o/47342140343 Not The Chancla: How Awareness of Our History & Trauma Create Compassion to Rewrite Our Future https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BMNVVWWS?ref_=pe_3052080_276849420

  4. Oct 12

    Why Chaos Feels Familiar with Kristen Constantino

    You weren’t born believing you had to earn love. Somewhere along the way, you learned it. You learned to mistake chaos for chemistry, overgiving for love, and emotional pain for emotional connection. So what happens when you stop asking, “Why do I keep attracting this?” and start asking, “Why does this pattern feel familiar to me? In This Episode: The why behind your patternsattracting chaos to choosing calmwhat is a trauma bondKristen Constantino is the author of Shattered to Shining and creator of the SHINING Method™, helping women break unhealthy relationship patterns, heal from their past, and rebuild their confidence and identity. Through her own journey of breaking toxic cycles, she now empowers women to move from surviving to truly shining. Kristens Links: www.kristen-Constantino.com https://www.instagram.com/kristenaconstantino/ https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0H8RKXK87?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_YY8ZNZHNWHMQ3ZX0M5D8&bestFormat=true Abuse/ Domestic Violence Resources: ** SAVE These phone numbers in your Phone, even if you need to disguise the label** Crisis Hotline: 988 Domestic Violence National Number: (800) 799- SAFE (7233) Resources for Victims/survivors: https://www.justice.gov/ovw/resources-victims-and-survivors National Coalition Against Domestic Violence: (303) 839-1852 or (303) 839-1681 (TTY)Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) Hotline: National Sexual Assault Hotline. Free. Confidential. 24/7. (800) 656-HOPE (4673) Terms & Education: https://www.nsvrc.org/lets-talk-campus/definitions-of-terms/ https://apps.rainn.org/policy/compare/crimes.cfm Moniques Links: https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Mental Health Resources& Local AZ Therapists/Agencies https://dtheal.org/mh-resources My Book (Not The Chancla) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BMNVVWWS?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_JWNKE5Q87F91DPHAD20A&bestFormat=true You are not alone. There is help out there. If you (or your loved one) is in immediate danger please call 911 (USA)

  5. Oct 5

    Just What You Do:The Life You're Supposed To Want

    What if some of the things you think you want were never actually your desires—they were expectations you learned so early that they started to feel like your identity? In this conversation with Madisen, we’re unpacking the messages women receive about being “good,” being desirable, getting married, becoming a wife or mother, and knowing our place. And then we’re asking a harder question: Who are you when you stop doing what you’re “just supposed to do”? In This Episode: Seeking Desire, Wants and Needs to explore YouLoss of Self or ReContrsucting Yourself Sometimes it okay Basic Needs Come First Madisen Rose is a somatic practitioner, and founder of Better Half to Whole, a platform dedicated to supporting individuals through the renegotiation of relational trauma in the nervous system, specializing in divorce recovery. Through one on one sessions, digital resources, self-paced online courses, and group programs, Madisen helps people rebuild after divorce with intention, compassion, grit, and self-trust. Through trauma-trained practices, she bridges the space between science and the sacred. Madisens links: Website www.betterhalftowhole.com Consult: https://calendly.com/madisen-betterhalftowhole/20-minute-somatic-consult-free https://better-half-to-whole.kit.com/93227e3020?utm_id=97760_v0_s00_e0_tv4 Moniques Links $35 Intro Session https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Free and Low Cost Events https://www.eventbrite.com/o/monique-dare-to-heal-47342140343 My Book https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BMNVVWWS?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_W2N4XBPBF91KXZNS4FSS&bestFormat=true

  6. Sep 28

    3 Reasons I Won't Go Back to Mental Health Therapy

    This episode is brought to you by my reminders of therapeutic burnout after visiting a therapist community gathering. Iam no longer burnt out, even when I went back this year as a Behavior Coach for kids. I learned to maintain my nervous system and keep my own life outside work. Hi, I am Monique Gomez, former Mental Health Clinician, now a Trauma and Resilience Life Coach for 4 years and an Energy and bodyworker for 16. In This Episode: - Suppression of my System rage - Other alternatives to "therapy" - Theory I made up that I didn't make time to research properly Episodes mentioned in this one: -Coaching Flexibility with Jennifer Jakobsen (May 2024- Season 1) https://open.spotify.com/episode/1IJTOSuN64ziAX65MiZLOf?si=-yQ0q2yOSLispbPNcy1iKg https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/coaching-flexibility-with-jennifer-jakobsen/id1717846722?i=1000654647004 Moniques LINKS https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session (intro Session) https://www.eventbrite.com/o/47342140343 (events- Free and Low Ticket) https://www.amazon.com/Not-Chancla-Awareness-History-Compassion/dp/B0BPG8BRW5 (my Book) Trauma and Resilience Life Coaching (TRLC) is NOT therapy. The SAFNET/ Empowerment timeline is for people who feel safe enough in their body to process their past with a safe person. TRLC is a great complement to therapy and other mental health treatment. If you would like more details please book an Introductory Session with Monique Gomez, MSW, TRLC ($35 USD)

  7. Sep 21

    They Told Me I Needed This Medication for the Rest of My Life...

    What happens when you’re given a diagnosis, told what your future will look like, and expected to trust the system without questioning it? Her hyperthyroidism story takes us through fertility fears, suicide, self-forgiveness, lifestyle and environmental changes, and the conversations that happened when she connected with other women living with the same diagnosis.  Then she asks a question that challenges the entire system: if we stop blindly accepting treatment and start taking ownership of our health, who loses power—and who loses money? Hi I’m Shelby Poutre, a wife and mom of 2. I’m a busy mom, homeschooling, and homemaking, as well as running businesses alongside my husband. I still feel drawn to help women steward the life God has given them by sharing my story and what has helped me. I believe we all have a story that is meant to be a roadmap for someone else. In This Episode: Tools for evaluating your own healthEnvironmental changes and a stress-reduction lifestyleQuestioning the System and its benefits Shelby's Links https://www.instagram.com/shelby_poutre_/ https://www.facebook.com/shelby.blake.35 Moniques Links Intro Call ($35) https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Events (free and low cost, virtual and in person) https://www.eventbrite.com/o/monique-dare-to-heal-47342140343 My Book https://a.co/d/06or4SoS

  8. Sep 14

    I Kept Sabotaging My Money-Until I Stopped Blaming Myself

    "You never self-sabotage," my partner said, right before I fell back into an old story. Even after 3-4 years of consistently working on my money story; in calm of my weeks I started to not feel like I am enough, wanting more, seeking to rid the money I was making. Monique Gomez is an Integrative Somatic Practitioner and Trauma & Resilience Coach who helps people come back to safety in their bodies and make peace with their past. A former Mental Health Therapist with a Master’s in Social Work, Reiki Master, and Licensed Massage Therapist, she blends exposure-based therapeutics with somatic healing to support deep, lasting change. Monique specializes in working with those who feel unseen, overextend themselves, or struggle with self-worth—guiding them to understand their nervous system, shift patterns, and build capacity for discomfort without overwhelm. ** Building Regulation 3 Month Group coming January 2027** 45 Min Intro https://dtheal.org/45-min-introductory-session Free and Low Ticket Events https://www.eventbrite.com/o/monique-dare-to-heal-47342140343 My Book https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BPG8BRW5?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_AFJ5NWZRV9A3HNSMPNSH&bestFormat=true

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About

Are you avoiding places and people to feel more comfortable? Welcome to the Avoidance and Control Podcast, together we will uncover these common reactions of our nervous system and learn to use them to our advantage to get our voices heard and needs met. Join me as we step out of society's view of health and focus on skills over symptoms. Host Monique Gomez former mental health clinician turned Trauma and Resilience Life Coach, will simplify the science to help you navigate being a human with reactions, tools to support, and how her coaching to reach compassion beyond your imagination.

Information

  • Creator
    Monique Gomez
  • Years Active
    2023 - 2026
  • Episodes
    80
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Monique Gomez
  • Show Website
    Avoidance and Control