Parenting Teens: Advice Redefined for Today's Complex World

Cheryl Pankhurst

"Discover ''Parenting Teens : Advice Redefined for Today's Complex World" with Special Education Specialist / Educator Cheryl, as we dive into real and raw conversations about sex, drugs, screens, social media, LGBTQ+ issues, mental health, and more. This podcast is your guide to reimagining better relationships with teens by doing the essential inner work. Join us for engaging, vibrant, and empathetic discussions that foster trust and understanding in today's complex parenting landscape.  Embrace the change,we just can’t parent the way our parents did” Questions this podcast will answer;     I am so grateful for you taking your time to listen and I would love your input, feedback , suggestions for topics. We are in this together.  Connect with me support@cherylpankhurst.com   linkedin.com/in/cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst   https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13   https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t   Optin-podcast subscriber https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/teen-minds-redefined-podcast   How to work with me!   https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/consulting   Editing credit Gabbi Greco   

  1. 2d ago

    Setting Boundaries with Teens: Stop Controlling, Start Parenting with Curiosity with Emily Ricks

    Parenting teens can feel like a constant power struggle, and most moms are stuck obsessing over behavior they can’t control. In this episode, certified life coach and mom of four Emily Ricks (host of the Think New Thoughts podcast) explains how to set limits with your teenager without nagging, yelling, arguing, or punishing. You’ll learn why control is an illusion, how curiosity beats lectures, and how to let your teen own their decisions while you stay connected. In this episode you’ll learn: Why teens “do it on purpose” and how to respond without giving them a reactionWhy “choosing a hill to die on” creates conflict and resentmentHow to ask curious questions when your teen makes choices that clash with your valuesWhat to say when your teen makes a big mistake (instead of “I told you so”)How to stop helicoptering and let natural consequences build confidenceThe OOPS framework: why “that’s not a boundary” (Obsess, Overlook, Program the remote control, Speak in anger)The AIMS framework for joyful boundaries (Allow, I respect you either way, My actions are the focus, Speak calmly)How to stop parenting from fear of what other people thinkWhy boundaries are for you, not for controlling your teenFeatured guest: Emily Ricks, certified life coach for moms and host of Think New Thoughts. Free resource mentioned: “The Three Shifts That Change Everything,” a guide for moms who want to enjoy their kids again (link in show notes). Key takeaway: You can’t control your teenager, but you can set clear limits with your own actions, speak calmly, and build the lifelong relationship you want. Work with Cheryl: Educational consulting and the 90-day advocacy program at CherylPankhurst.com. Book a complimentary consultation. Subscribe, share, and leave a review to help other parents find the show. #ParentingTeens #ParentingTeenagers #TeenParenting #ParentingAdvice #ParentingPodcast YOUR GIFT- GUIDE FOR GRADE 8 TO GRADE 9 IEP TRANSITIONS https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/iep-high-school-transition-parent-quick-guide Let’s Chat https://tidycal.com/cherylpankhurst/consultation-chat http://cherylpankhurst.com Connect with Cheryl! Get the book here! Daring to Belong: Autism Stories of Courage and Connection DIRECT LINK TO COACHING WITH CHERYL  email : support@cherylpankhurst.com  Website  cherylpankhurst.com SOCIALS: My Substack linkedin.com/in/l. R.cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst PODCAST- “PARENTING TEENS ADVICE REDEFINED FOR TODAY’S WORLD THE PODCAST https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13 https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t Optin-podcast subscriber Parenting Teens Advice Redefined

  2. Oct 21

    ~188~"ADHD Medication: What Parents of Neurodivergent Teens Need to Know" with Lisa Richer Part 2

    Video is not supported by this plan. Upgrade to add video files. #ParentingTeens #NeurodivergentTeens #ADHDParenting #ADHDMedication #NeurodivergentParenting If you’re parenting a neurodivergent teenager and struggling with questions about ADHD medication, diagnosis, anxiety, school supports, or what your teen actually needs, this conversation is for you. In Part 2 of my conversation with Lisa Richer, we take a deeper look at one of the most emotionally charged decisions parents of neurodivergent kids can face: medication. But this episode isn’t about telling you whether medication is right or wrong. It’s about helping you make decisions from a place of information, curiosity and connection rather than fear, shame or pressure. Lisa and I talk openly about our own experiences with ADHD, parenting neurodivergent children, diagnosis, medication and the importance of looking at the whole child—not just the most obvious behaviour or diagnosis. One of the biggest takeaways? There is no one-size-fits-all approach to supporting a neurodivergent teen. What works beautifully for one child may not be appropriate for another. And sometimes what looks like ADHD, anxiety, defiance, lack of motivation or poor behaviour may actually be connected to an underlying learning difference, communication challenge, sensory need or another unmet need. In this episode, we explore:How parents can think differently about ADHD medication for teensWhy medication decisions shouldn’t be made from fear, guilt or outside pressureThe importance of combining medication with appropriate interventions, tools and supportsWhy a diagnosis should inform your understanding of your teen—not define themHow anxiety, ADHD and other neurodivergent differences can interactWhy parents need to look beyond the most obvious diagnosisThe importance of understanding the whole childHow learning differences can affect confidence, anxiety, regulation and school successWhy behaviour is communicationHow to build a support team for your neurodivergent teenThe roles that educators, psychologists, speech-language pathologists, occupational therapists, advocates and other professionals can playWhy parents should trust their instincts while also seeking professional guidanceHow parents can move from “I failed my child” to “What do we know now, and what is the next step?”Why asking for help is a strength—not a failureHow parents can model self-advocacy for their teenagersOne of the most important messages for parentsYou don't have to choose between “medication” and “no medication.” The bigger question is: What does my teen need, and what combination of supports will help them understand themselves, function more effectively and become a stronger self-advocate? As Lisa says, we don't know what we don't know. Sometimes the missing piece is another assessment. Sometimes it's a school support. Sometimes it's a different intervention. Sometimes it's medication. And sometimes it's bringing the right people together to finally see the complete picture. For parents of neurodivergent teensIf you're thinking: “Something isn't working, but I don't know what we're missing.” You're not alone. You don't have to figure it out by yourself. The goal isn't to find the perfect parenting strategy or make the perfect decision every time. The goal is to stay curious, keep learning, ask better questions and make informed decisions based on your teenager's unique needs. ABOUT LISA RICHERLisa Richer is a Neurodivergent Success Partner and Advocate who helps transform “stuck” into success for students, athletes, parents, professionals and families. Through her Clarity, Confidence, Courage Journey Map, Lisa helps clients navigate internal, relational and systemic roadblocks while connecting them with the tools, resources and people they need to move forward. CONNECT WITH MEI'm Cheryl Pankhurst, an Educational Strategist, Family Advocate and School Navigation Consultant with more than 25 years of experience supporting teenagers and their families. I help parents navigate: Neurodivergent diagnosesSchool challengesIEPs and accommodationsAssessmentsHigh school transitionsAdvocacy meetingsBuilding effective support teamsIf your teen is struggling at school, you've received a new diagnosis, or you're wondering what to do next, you don't have to navigate it alone. Visit CherylPankhurst.com to learn more and book a complimentary consultation. LISTEN • FOLLOW • SHAREIf this episode helped you understand your neurodivergent teen differently, please: ⭐ Follow the podcast ⭐ Leave a review ⭐ Share this episode with another parent of a neurodivergent teen Because sometimes the conversation a parent needs is the one they didn't even know they needed to have. #ParentingADHD #ADHDTeens #AutismParenting #TeenMentalHealth #SpecialEducation #ParentAdvocacy #SchoolAdvocacy #Neurodiversity #ADHDSupport #ParentingNeurodivergentKids #IEPAdvocacy #TeenADHD #NeurodivergentFamilies #EducationalAdvocate #ParentingSupport YOUR GIFT- GUIDE FOR GRADE 8 TO GRADE 9 IEP TRANSITIONS https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/iep-high-school-transition-parent-quick-guide Let’s Chat https://tidycal.com/cherylpankhurst/consultation-chat Connect with Cheryl! Get the book here! Daring to Belong: Autism Stories of Courage and Connection DIRECT LINK TO COACHING WITH CHERYL  email : support@cherylpankhurst.com  Website  cherylpankhurst.com SOCIALS: My Substack linkedin.com/in/l. R.cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst PODCAST- “PARENTING TEENS ADVICE REDEFINED FOR TODAY’S WORLD THE PODCAST https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13 https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t Optin-podcast subscriber Parenting Teens Advice Redefined

  3. Oct 14

    ~200~“I Call BS: You Already Know What You Need to Do! It took 200 episodes to tell you this!"

    Episode 200: Celebrating 3 Years, 200 Episodes, and the Truth About “I Don’t Know” Welcome to a very special solo episode of Parenting Teens: Advice Redefined for Today’s World! Three years to the day since Episode 1 dropped (on her son’s birthday, October 13th), your host is celebrating a massive milestone with a raw, honest, and fired-up message for anyone sitting on a dream, a decision, or a hard conversation they keep avoiding. In this episode: Why this podcast has been the joy of her life, and the 180+ guests who became friendsA heartfelt thank-you to her editor (and daughter) Gabby, who dared her to start in the first placeWhy we’re parenting in “uncharted territory” with social media, AI, devices, and a post-pandemic worldThe real reason she keeps saying “it’s not them, it’s you,” and why it’s not a judgment, it’s handing your power backWhy you KNOW what your next step is, and why “I don’t know” is often fear in disguiseThe hard truth: sitting in the in-between is 1000% harder than making the leapHow she went from terrified of public speaking to comfortable on camera, once helping people mattered more than her own nervesWhy your story could be the thing a parent is Googling at midnightWhat she wishes she knew: you can’t negotiate with a red flag, trust your first gut instinct, and you don’t have to know everything to startBig announcement: She’s writing a book of real, heart-led stories on autism, drawn from the experts and guests who’ve appeared on the showKey takeaways: You don’t need to know every step, only the next one.Your story is someone else’s lifeline.Community means hearing each other out, even when we disagree.Your challenge this week: Name the one thing you’ve been brushing off. Then take one next step. She wants to hear about it! Connect with us: Want to be a guest? Reach out! YOUR GIFT- GUIDE FOR GRADE 8 TO GRADE 9 IEP TRANSITIONS https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/iep-high-school-transition-parent-quick-guide Let’s Chat https://tidycal.com/cherylpankhurst/consultation-chat http://cherylpankhurst.com Connect with Cheryl! Get the book here! Daring to Belong: Autism Stories of Courage and Connection DIRECT LINK TO COACHING WITH CHERYL  email : support@cherylpankhurst.com  Website  cherylpankhurst.com SOCIALS: My Substack linkedin.com/in/l. R.cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst PODCAST- “PARENTING TEENS ADVICE REDEFINED FOR TODAY’S WORLD THE PODCAST https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13 https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t Optin-podcast subscriber Parenting Teens Advice Redefined Share this episode with someone who needs a pushTune in Fridays for the solo “WTF: Welcome to Friday” episodesIf this episode moved you, please leave a rating and review. It helps other parents find the show! #ParentingTeens #ParentingPodcast #TeenParenting #PodcastMilestone #200Episodes #ParentingAdvice #RaisingTeens #ParentingTeenagers #MomsOfTeens #DadsOfTeens #ParentingSupport #ParentingCommunity #ParentCoach #TakeTheLeap #TrustYourGut #FollowYourDreams #StopPlayingSmall #MotivationMonday #BuildYourWingsOnTheWayDown #NextStep #YouKnowWhatToDo

  4. Oct 9 ·  Video

    ~199~"Gentle Parenting vs. Boundaries: How We Are Getting It Wrong With Our Teens?"

    Is gentle parenting actually helping our teenagers develop resilience, or are we sometimes taking it too far? Welcome to WTF Friday on Parenting Teens Advice Redefined for Today's World — where we have the honest conversations about parenting teenagers that don't always fit neatly into a parenting book. In this episode, I'm questioning what happens when gentle parenting moves from acknowledging our teenagers' feelings to allowing those feelings to dictate our parenting decisions. Many parents grew up hearing things like, “You're to be seen and not heard,” or “I'll give you something to cry about.” Understandably, they want something different for their own children. They want their teens to feel heard, understood, and supported. But what happens when we swing so far in the opposite direction that we start removing boundaries, fighting our teenagers' battles, or trying to protect them from every disappointment? As parents of teenagers, we need to understand the difference between validating our teen's emotions and changing our decisions because they're upset. In this candid Friday conversation, I explore: Gentle parenting and teenagers: Why some parents have embraced this approach and where I believe it can go wrong.Validating feelings without giving in: How to acknowledge anger, disappointment, and frustration without abandoning a reasonable boundary.Teenagers and consequences: What happens when a teen fails a course without doing the work — and why rescuing them from every consequence isn't necessarily helping.Overprotective parenting: When stepping in to solve our teens' problems may prevent them from learning to manage difficult situations themselves.Building resilience in teenagers: Why our teens need opportunities to experience disappointment, frustration, and challenges while knowing we're in their corner.Parenting boundaries: How to hold a decision even when your teenager is unhappy with it.Raising confident, capable teens: The power of communicating, “I know this is hard, and I have faith that you can handle it.”My message isn't that our teenagers' feelings don't matter. They absolutely do. It's that their feelings can be valid without every feeling requiring us to change the rules, fix the problem, or make the disappointment disappear. Our job isn't to make our teenagers' lives free of frustration. It's to help them develop the confidence and skills to navigate life when things don't go their way. And sometimes, one of the most powerful things we can tell our teens is this: “I know it sucks. And I believe you can handle it.” Let's talk: Has gentle parenting gone too far, or are we simply learning to parent differently from the generations before us? Where do you draw the line between validating your teenager's feelings and holding a boundary? Share your thoughts. I genuinely want to hear this conversation. 🎧 Listen, reflect, and join the conversation on Parenting Teens Advice Redefined for Today's World. YOUR GIFT- GUIDE FOR GRADE 8 TO GRADE 9 IEP TRANSITIONS https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/iep-high-school-transition-parent-quick-guide Let’s Chat https://tidycal.com/cherylpankhurst/consultation-chat http://cherylpankhurst.com Connect with Cheryl! Get the book here! Daring to Belong: Autism Stories of Courage and Connection DIRECT LINK TO COACHING WITH CHERYL  email : support@cherylpankhurst.com  Website  cherylpankhurst.com SOCIALS: My Substack linkedin.com/in/l. R.cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst PODCAST- “PARENTING TEENS ADVICE REDEFINED FOR TODAY’S WORLD THE PODCAST https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13 https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t Optin-podcast subscriber Parenting Teens Advice Redefined

  5. Oct 7

    ~198~"AI, Phones, Failure & Accountability: Are We Preparing Teens for Adulthood?" with Michael Scheller

    Are We Raising Capable Teens—or Making Life Too Easy for Them? What if one of the biggest things standing between our teenagers and independence… is us? In this no-filter conversation, Cheryl sits down with Michael Scheller, founder of Astute Academics and an educational consultant with more than 15 years of experience working with students and families. And fair warning: this conversation goes everywhere. From phones and social media to AI, academic pressure, gentle parenting, failure, accountability, resilience and the uncomfortable truth that sometimes our teenagers need us to step back rather than step in. Michael and Cheryl don't agree on everything—and that's exactly what makes this conversation so good. Because parenting teenagers isn't about finding the one "right" answer. It's about being willing to question what we're doing, examine our own values, and ask: Are we actually preparing our kids for adulthood—or are we making their lives so manageable that they never get the chance to manage them themselves? In this episode, we talk about:Why teenagers need opportunities to fail, struggle and figure things outWhether we're protecting our kids from discomfort at the expense of resilienceThe difference between acknowledging your teen's feelings and letting their feelings dictate the outcomeWhy accountability is a skill teenagers need to practice—not something we can simply demandCell phones, social media and how much access teenagers really needThe importance of parents deciding their own technology values instead of looking outside themselves for validationHow excessive screen time may be affecting learning, attention and independenceWhy reading still matters in an increasingly digital worldAI and teenagers: when it can support learning and when it simply does the thinking for themWhy using AI to write your teen's paper may solve today's problem while creating a much bigger problem tomorrowThe difference between using AI as a collaborator and pressure tester versus using it as a replacement for thinkingWhy parents need to stop rescuing their teenagers from every uncomfortable consequenceWhat sports, competition and losing can teach teenagers about resilienceWhy "everybody gets a trophy" can sometimes rob kids of the opportunity to experience disappointmentThe importance of parents modeling accountability by saying "I was wrong. I'm sorry."Why apologizing to your teenager isn't weakness—it's leadershipHow parents can teach their kids to disagree without needing to prove the other person wrongWhy we need to raise teenagers who can think, question, communicate and solve problems, not simply get the answer One of the biggest takeaways You can have your teen's back without carrying them. You can acknowledge that something is hard without removing the hard thing. You can say: "That sucks. I know you're disappointed. And I'm still not fixing it for you." Because sometimes the most powerful message we can give our teenagers is: "I know you can handle this. And I'm not going to take that opportunity away from you." About Michael SchellerMichael Scheller is the founder of Astute Academics and an educational consultant who has spent more than 15 years working with students and families. His work focuses on academics, educational strategy, student development and helping families navigate the increasingly complicated world of education. Connect with MichaelMichael can be reached through LinkedIn or at Astute Academics. https://www.linkedin.com/in/michael-scheller-994b53a5/ About Cheryl PankhurstCheryl Pankhurst is an Educational Strategist & Family Advocate with more than 25 years of experience in education, including extensive experience supporting teenagers with learning differences, ADHD, autism, anxiety and other educational needs. Through Insight to Impact, Cheryl helps parents understand the school system, interpret assessments, navigate IEPs and school meetings, advocate effectively, and support their teenagers without taking over. Learn more and connect with Cheryl at CherylPankhurst.com. If your teen is struggling at school, navigating a new diagnosis, or you need help figuring out what to do next, Cheryl offers educational consulting and 90-day advocacy support. If this episode resonated with you...Follow or subscribe to Parenting Teens Advice Redefined for Today's World, share this episode with another parent, and leave a review. And remember: You are not failing because you don't have all the answers. You're a parent who is still trying to figure it out. You don't have to do this alone.

  6. Sep 30

    ~197~"When Your Child Is Diagnosed With ADHD or Autism: The Grief, Identity Shift & Parenting Reset" with Nadia Patel

    Parenting Teens Advice Redefined for Today’s World with Cheryl Pankhurst What happens when your child receives an ADHD or autism diagnosis—and suddenly the future you imagined for your family feels uncertain? In this deeply honest conversation, Cheryl Pankhurst talks with Nadia Patel, high-performance identity coach, speaker, and mother of two neurodivergent children, about the emotional side of parenting that doesn't get talked about enough. Because a diagnosis doesn't just change what you understand about your child. Sometimes, it changes how you see yourself. Nadia shares her personal journey through parenting ADHD and autism, including the shock of diagnosis, parental grief, burnout, fear about the future, financial and family pressures, and the realization that she needed to work on her own emotional regulation before she could fully support her children. And this conversation gets real. We talk about the thoughts parents may be afraid to admit: What does this mean for my child's future? What does this mean for my career? What will this do to our marriage? Will our family ever feel normal again? Those thoughts don't make you a bad parent. They make you human. But what we do with those thoughts matters. Nadia explains how shifting her own identity changed the way she experienced her son's autism and ADHD—and how she moved from seeing the challenges as something that was bigger than her to becoming someone who could hold both her family and the life she still wanted to create. Cheryl and Nadia also discuss why parents need to be careful about spending too much time in online parenting groups, consuming worst-case scenarios about autism and ADHD, and worrying about problems that may never happen. For parents of neurodivergent children and teens, this episode is a reminder that your child's diagnosis is not the end of their story—and it doesn't have to be the end of yours either. In this episode, we talk about:What parents may experience emotionally after an ADHD or autism diagnosisThe grief that can accompany a diagnosis—and why talking about it doesn't mean you don't accept your childThe difference between accepting your child and worrying about how the world will treat themParenting burnout and why parental regulation mattersHow a parent's internal view of their child can influence the way that child experiences themselvesThe identity shift that can happen when you're parenting a neurodivergent childADHD and autism parenting challengesHow parents can hold space for their child's needs without putting their own dreams and identity on holdFinding practical support when you're overwhelmedWhy asking for help is not failureThe impact of neurodivergence on siblings, marriage, finances and family lifeWhy online parenting communities can sometimes increase anxiety instead of reducing itThe importance of staying grounded in the present instead of constantly worrying about your child's futureWhy your child's diagnosis does not mean you have to abandon the life you wantA message for the parent listeningIf you've ever thought, “I don't know how we're going to do this,” you're not alone. And if you've had thoughts or feelings that you don't feel comfortable admitting out loud, that doesn't automatically make you a bad parent. You may simply need somewhere safe to process what you're carrying. As Nadia says, getting support for yourself can be one of the most important things you do for your child. And Cheryl's reminder throughout this podcast is simple: It's not them. It's you—and that's where the magic happens. Not because your teen or child is the problem. Because sometimes changing the way we understand ourselves, our children and the situation we're facing changes everything. About Nadia PatelNadia Patel is a high-performance identity coach, speaker and mother of two neurodivergent children. Her work focuses on identity, self-belief, confidence and the internal shifts that can help people create meaningful change in their careers, relationships, businesses and lives. Find Nadia at nadiapatelcoaching.com. About Cheryl PankhurstCheryl Pankhurst is an Educational Strategist and Family Advocate with more than 25 years of experience supporting teenagers, families and schools. Her work includes neurodivergent teens, ADHD, autism, psycho-educational assessments, IEPs, school advocacy and the transition through high school. If your teenager is struggling at school, you've received a new diagnosis, you're trying to understand an assessment, or you need help navigating the school system, visit CherylPankhurst.com. #NeurodivergentParenting #ADHDParenting #AutismParenting #ParentingTeens #ParentingTeenagers

  7. Sep 23

    ~196~ Why Your Teen Can Game for Hours but Can’t Do Homework: Executive Functioning, Time Blindness & Motivation Anna Levy Warren

    #ParentingTeens #TeenParenting #ExecutiveFunctioning #ADHDParenting #NeurodivergentTeens #TeenMentalHealth #TimeBlindness #ParentingADHD #TeenDevelopment #ExecutiveFunctioningSkills #ParentingSupport #NeurodivergentParenting #ParentingPodcast #Teenagers #EducationalAdvocacy Have you ever wondered how your teenager can spend hours gaming, scrolling TikTok, or hanging out with friends—but somehow can't get ready for school, start their homework, remember what they need, or get out the door on time? And then you find yourself thinking: “They can do it when they want to. So why won't they do it?” What if the problem isn't motivation, laziness, defiance, or not caring? In this episode of Parenting Teens: Advice Redefined for Today's World, I sit down with Dr. Anna Levy-Warren, licensed clinical psychologist, speaker, founder of Organizational Tutors, and an expert in executive functioning, to unpack what's really happening underneath these everyday struggles. With more than 20 years of experience working in psychology and education—and as a parent herself—Anna brings both professional expertise and lived experience to this conversation. What you'll learn about executive functioningExecutive functioning isn't one single skill. It's an interconnected set of cognitive processes that help us manage things like: Working memorySelf-regulationMental flexibilityPlanningTask initiationDecision-makingTime managementAttentionOrganizationGoal-settingAnd when these skills are developing differently, the impact can show up everywhere—not just at school. Why can your teen remember every song but forget three instructions?We talk about the difference between long-term memory and working memory, and why a teenager can remember an incredible amount of information but still forget what you just asked them to do. “Go get ready for school” might sound like one simple instruction to a parent. For a teen with working-memory challenges, it can actually contain a whole series of steps that are difficult to hold onto and execute. Is your teen experiencing time blindness?If you're sitting in the car with the engine running while your teenager is still inside getting ready, this part of the conversation is for you. Anna explains time blindness and why some teens don't experience time in the same way their parents do. We talk about: Working backwards from a deadlineBuilding in extra timeUsing alarms and visual remindersCreating routines collaborativelyReducing verbal remindersHelping teens build their own systems rather than constantly managing themStop calling it lazinessOne of the biggest themes in this conversation is the difference between “won't” and “can't yet.” A teen may genuinely want to do something and still struggle to initiate it, organize it, estimate the time required, or shift away from something they are deeply engaged in. And yes, your teen may be able to play video games for three hours. That doesn't necessarily mean they are capable of transferring that same level of attention and executive functioning to a math assignment. Motivation isn't the whole storyWe also challenge the idea that a teenager is simply “motivated” when they want to do something and “unmotivated” when they don't. Adults work this way too. There are things we can do for hours because we enjoy them—and things we procrastinate on despite knowing they need to be done. So what happens when we stop treating our teenagers like they're deliberately making our lives difficult and start looking at what support the task actually requires? Your teen's chronological age isn't necessarily their developmental ageA 16-year-old is chronologically 16. But their executive functioning skills don't necessarily develop in a perfectly linear way. Your teen might be incredibly mature in one area and need significantly more scaffolding in another. We talk about why parents need to look at the developmental skill required by the task, rather than simply assuming that a teenager should be able to do something because of their age. Executive functioning affects more than schoolWe also explore how executive functioning can affect: Friendships and social relationshipsSocial media usePhone regulationImpulsivityPlanning social activitiesExtracurricular activitiesSleepEatingFuture planningCollege preparationEmotional regulationKnowing when to stopWhat should parents do instead?This conversation is packed with practical strategies, including: Collaborate instead of command. Instead of putting the problem between you and your teen, put the problem in front of both of you and work on it together. Use visual cues. Post-it notes, calendars, written instructions, alarms and other visual systems can reduce the endless parent-teen verbal ping-pong. Talk less when everyone is activated. When your teenager's nervous system is overwhelmed, more talking usually isn't the answer. Work backwards. Start with the time your teen needs to be somewhere and work backwards to determine when they need to begin getting ready. Build the system with your teen. The goal isn't for you to become your teenager's external executive functioning system forever. It's to gradually help them develop systems they can eventually use independently. The family calendarAnna has a particular obsession with the family calendar—and after this conversation, I can see why. A shared visual calendar can help teenagers anticipate what's coming, understand competing demands, see how much time they actually have, and participate in planning their own lives. Instead of: “You have a test Monday!” Try: “Let's look at the week together. You have a test, you want to see your friends, and we have Grandma's birthday. How can we make all of this work?” That's the shift. From control → collaboration. From consequences → curiosity. From telling → problem-solving together. About Dr. Anna Levy-WarrenDr. Anna Levy-Warren is a licensed clinical psychologist, speaker, and founder of Organizational Tutors, a company that connects students and families with customized executive functioning support. Her work focuses on helping young people develop the skills they need to navigate academics, relationships, emotional growth, organization, and everyday life. Connect with Dr. AnnaLearn more about Dr. Anna Levy-Warren and Organizational Tutors through the link in the episode resources. Connect with CherylI'm Cheryl Pankhurst, Educational Strategist and Family Advocate, and host of Parenting Teens: Advice Redefined for Today's World. If your teenager is struggling at school, navigating a new diagnosis, transitioning to high school, or you need help understanding assessments, IEPs, accommodations, or how to advocate effectively within the school system, you can work with me directly. Visit CherylPankhurst.com to learn more and book a complimentary consultation. And remember: It's not them. It's you. And that's where the magic happens. If this episode gave you a different way to understand your teenager, share it with another parent. You never know who needs to hear that their teen isn't simply being lazy, defiant, or unmotivated.

  8. Sep 16

    ~195~# Your Teen’s Phone Is Changing More Than You Think: Social Media, Identity & Parenting Teens with Dr. Michelle Machado

    Dr. Michelle Machado is an international keynote speaker, author, human performance strategist and creator of the Human Connection Framework™. Recognized for her dynamic presence as a 2x TEDx speaker, Dr. Machado is a trusted voice on connection and self-leadership in an always-on world. Her work has been featured in Forbes, USA Today, MSN, The Economic Times and Business Insider. She has also delivered high-impact keynotes for Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit audiences. With a PhD, MBA, and two decades of leadership in universities spanning Canada, Hong Kong, Australia, and the UK, Dr. Machado uniquely blends neuroscience and lived experience to challenge the epidemic of disconnection. She empowers high-achievers to reclaim attention, presence and fulfilment beginning with reconnection to self. Her practical approach has made her a sought-after advisor to leaders worldwide who are ready to transform how they live, work, and lead in a rapidly changing world. In her upcoming book, Alive Again: 4 Steps to Reclaim Your Life in a Distracted World, Dr. Machado makes the case that high-performance leadership and lasting impact are impossible without first mastering internal alignment, because the way we lead ourselves ultimately defines how we lead others. LinkedIn and IG (drmichellemachado). Website: https://michelledmachado.com What if the biggest influence on your teenager isn’t what you’re saying to them—but what they’re watching you do? In this powerful conversation, Dr. Michelle Machado and I get into the messy, complicated reality of parenting teenagers in a world that neither of us grew up in. We talk about social media, screen time, comparison, authenticity, resilience, human connection, nervous-system regulation, and the pressure parents feel to keep their kids constantly busy and entertained. And yes, we talk about phones. Because today’s parents are navigating something completely different from the world we grew up in. Our kids can carry school drama, friendship problems, comparison, cyberbullying and social pressure straight into their bedrooms—and onto the dinner table—24/7. But this conversation isn't about blaming parents. It's about getting curious. Dr. Michelle shares why she believes human connection has three critical layers: connection to self, connection to others, and connection to the world and a greater sense of purpose. We also talk about what authenticity actually looks like for our kids—and how easily we can confuse our idea of who they should be with their emerging identity. In this episode, we talk about:Why teenagers need to develop their own authentic identityThe difference between advocating for your child and allowing them to become themselvesHow parents can model authenticity instead of simply talking about itWhy “pick your battles” matters when parenting teensSocial media, comparison and the impact of constant digital stimulationWhy “everyone else has a phone” is such a difficult parenting conversationHow to talk to a teenager who is already using social mediaWhy education and buy-in may work better than simply taking the phone awayThe importance of teaching kids to compare themselves with their previous selves—not everyone elseWhy boredom is actually an important part of childhoodThe pressure parents feel to keep their kids constantly busyWhat our own hustle, stress and constant stimulation are teaching our childrenWhy parents need white space tooSetting boundaries when you're exhausted and overwhelmedThe idea that “your calm is contagious—and so is your chaos”How children can learn to recognize when they need to “recharge”Why vulnerability can completely change a difficult conversation with your teenagerOne of my favourite moments is Michelle's reminder that we don't have to force our children to change. We can invite them to consider another perspective. That distinction matters. Our teenagers are becoming their own people. Our job isn't to control every choice they make. It's to give them the values, critical thinking, self-awareness and relationship with us that they can carry with them when we're no longer standing beside them. And sometimes, that means knowing which hill is actually worth dying on. A conversation every parent of a teenager needs to hear.If you've ever found yourself wondering: “Did I already screw this up?” “How do I get my kid off their phone?” “Why are they comparing themselves to everyone?” “Am I parenting from my values—or from fear?” “What am I actually modeling for my teenager?” —you are not alone. And you're not failing because you're still trying to figure it out. About Dr. Michelle MachadoDr. Michelle Machado is an international speaker, TEDx presenter, medical educator and founder of the Human Connection Framework. With more than two decades of experience in education and leadership across multiple countries, her work focuses on the connection between mindset, identity, human potential and meaningful human connection. Her book, Alive Again: Four Steps to Reclaim Your Life in a Distracted World, explores what happens when our external lives look successful while internally we feel disconnected—and how we begin to reconnect with ourselves. Find Michelle at michellmachado.com and connect with her on LinkedIn and Instagram at Dr. Michelle Machado. Resources mentionedThe Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt Michelle also recommends exploring Jonathan Haidt's work and the research surrounding children, smartphones, social media and mental health. If this episode resonated with you: Subscribe or follow the podcast, leave a review, and share this episode with another parent who is trying to navigate the teenage years without losing themselves—or their relationship with their kid. And if your teenager is struggling at school, navigating a new diagnosis, or you need help understanding assessments, IEPs, school meetings or high-school transitions, you can work with me directly through educational consulting or my 90-day advocacy program. Visit CherylPankhurst.com to learn more and book a complimentary consultation. Because parenting teens is fricking hard. But you do not have to figure it out alone. I got you. #ParentingTeens #TeenParenting #ParentingTeenagers #SocialMediaAndTeens #TeenMentalHealth #ScreenTime #TeenagersAndTechnology #ParentingAdvice #ConnectedParenting #AuthenticParenting #TeenResilience #HumanConnection #DigitalParenting #ParentingPodcast #AnxiousGeneration #ParentingInTodaysWorld #TeenIdentity #ParentingSupport #NeurodivergentTeens #CherylPankhurst

5
out of 5
6 Ratings

About

"Discover ''Parenting Teens : Advice Redefined for Today's Complex World" with Special Education Specialist / Educator Cheryl, as we dive into real and raw conversations about sex, drugs, screens, social media, LGBTQ+ issues, mental health, and more. This podcast is your guide to reimagining better relationships with teens by doing the essential inner work. Join us for engaging, vibrant, and empathetic discussions that foster trust and understanding in today's complex parenting landscape.  Embrace the change,we just can’t parent the way our parents did” Questions this podcast will answer;     I am so grateful for you taking your time to listen and I would love your input, feedback , suggestions for topics. We are in this together.  Connect with me support@cherylpankhurst.com   linkedin.com/in/cheryl-ann-pankhurst-1b611855 https://www.instagram.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst/                       https://www.facebook.com/cheryl.a.pankhurst   https://open.spotify.com/show/4QwFMJMDDSEXJb451pCHO9?si=9c1a298387c84e13   https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLYv9FQy1X43wwoYg0zF8zAJw6-nCpHMAk&si=7p-e4UlU2rsG3j_t   Optin-podcast subscriber https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/teen-minds-redefined-podcast   How to work with me!   https://www.cherylpankhurst.com/consulting   Editing credit Gabbi Greco   

You Might Also Like