ABGW - Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful

Cheryl Paris
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 From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. ABGW  stands for Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful. ABGW helps women who feel “not quite happy” in a life that looks good on paper move from survival mode to self-led strength, with practical tools, gentle humour, and zero fluff.  ABGW is Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful: A Trauma-Aware Project by Cheryl Paris. I work with women who feel misaligned in a life that’s “fine” but not fulfilling. Through conversations, coaching prompts, and small doable practices, I help you move from constant coping to steady, self-led living. Gentle where it matters, firm where it counts, always respectful of your pace. The names in shared stories have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals. Experiences are drawn from real events and are offered for reflection and education, not as medical or psychological advice. If you feel distressed, step away and seek appropriate support. Safety first. More information: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers

  1. Why Your Boundaries Fail And How To Keep Them

    6D AGO

    Why Your Boundaries Fail And How To Keep Them

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Boundaries don’t need to be dramatic to work; they need to be steady. We wrap our mini series by turning vague requests into clear limits you can hold under pressure, even when your calendar is crammed and your stress is high. Instead of chasing the perfect speech, we practice one boring, repeatable line that keeps you calm and consistent. We break down the subtle but crucial gap between asking others to behave differently and deciding how you will act. You’ll hear simple scripts you can plug into your day right now: “I can do X by Friday or Y by Wednesday. Which do you want?” to create clear choices, and “I’m happy to help. What are we deprioritizing to make space for this?” to force alignment on trade-offs without a fight. Then we move from theory to action with a tiny step: send one short email that states what you’re doing, what you’re not, and what you need. No backstory. No overexplaining. Just a calm pattern you can repeat. We also talk about the emotional side of boundary work: the urge to justify, the wobble after pushback, and the myth that growth must look tidy to be real. Progress often looks like a slower breath, a shorter reply, a cleaner calendar block. For extra support, we point you to our emotional first aid kit and the companion blog post with deeper examples and language you can copy and adapt. If you’ve struggled to keep boundaries, this gentle, grounded approach helps you build limits that actually hold. If this helped, follow the show, share it with a friend who’s running on empty, and leave a quick review telling us which line you’ll try first. Your steady practice makes the biggest difference. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    4 min
  2. The Hidden Cost Of Always Saying Yes

    FEB 19

    The Hidden Cost Of Always Saying Yes

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. What if the fear of being judged is the only thing standing between you and the energy you’ve been missing? We zoom into that quiet worry—“if I put myself first, I’ll be judged”—and turn it into a clear, simple practice you can try today. Instead of chasing sweeping life overhauls, we focus on one change that sticks: a three-month cost check-in that pulls your choices out of the fog and into focus. We share why our short, focused format works for real-world growth: one idea, tried consistently, beats a dozen tips you’ll never use. You’ll hear how to audit the true costs of constant yeses on sleep, health, and confidence, and how to pair your insight with a grounded move that holds under pressure. The practical tool: ask for confirmation in writing and bring a note-taking ally when it matters. That small shift calms second-guessing, curbs gaslighting, and creates breathing room before you commit. We also name a pattern many women know too well: praised for overgiving, blamed for burnout. This isn’t a personal failure; it’s a system that benefits from your silence. While the system is slow to change, your choices can start now—modest, repeatable steps that protect your time and restore trust with yourself. If you’re tired of setting boundaries that don’t seem to stick, try tightening the loop between noticing, acting, and reflecting, and measure progress by what your body feels, not external approval. Take a pause with us, try the cost check-in, and test the written-backup move in one real situation this week. If it helps, share this episode with a friend who needs permission to choose themselves without guilt. Subscribe for more short, steady practices, and leave a review to tell us what landed for you. Your small steps count—every single one. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    8 min
  3. Learn How To Stop Swallowing The Sea Of Stress

    FEB 18

    Learn How To Stop Swallowing The Sea Of Stress

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Ever hear that inner voice say, “This won’t work for me,” and feel your body tense before your mind even argues back? We explore why that thought often signals a nervous system scanning for safety, not a verdict on your ability. Rather than trying to silence the storm, we share a gentler frame: you don’t have to calm the sea, you just need to stop swallowing it. That shift opens the door to micro actions that build trust, competence, and momentum without demanding perfection. We walk through a simple, visual tool to lower the volume of self-blame and worst-case thinking: picture an old rotary phone and turn the dial down 20 percent. No muting, no fighting — just enough quiet to ask a better question: what is the smallest interpretation that keeps me effective? From that steadier place, we outline one trying action you can take today to prove to your nervous system that progress and safety can coexist. To support focus, we introduce a clear boundary line for mental loops: “I’ve answered that. If there’s new information, tell me.” It’s a compact script that respects real risks while filtering recycled fear. Along the way, we name the deeper current that often hides beneath resistance: the fear of being blamed. By acknowledging blame as a social safety threat, we show how to move without inviting panic to steer. You’ll leave with language you can use, a micro shift you can try, and a way to notice subtle wins — steadier breath, cleaner choices, shorter ruminations — as valid data that your system is learning safety. If you need more structure, we point to our emotional first aid kit and other resources designed for moments just like this. Subscribe, share this with someone who’s stuck at “this won’t work,” and tell us: what tiny step will you try today? The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    5 min

  4. FEB 17

    From Overwhelm To Action: Sorting Complex Boundaries With Three Simple Buckets

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Feeling pinned by “it’s complicated”? We explore a calm way to navigate messy boundary moments without drama or self-doubt. When history, power, or office politics make everything feel loaded, our minds swirl. We slow that swirl with a simple framework: step back, sort the noise, and choose one small next move that raises your sense of control. We start by naming why certain interactions feel heavier than others—off‑record comments that linger, hazy agreements, HR tensions, and the quiet pressure to just tolerate. Instead of feeding the overwhelm, we use a gentle dissociation technique from coaching and hypnotherapy: take one mental step back so you can separate what happened from what it did to you. Then we put everything into three buckets. Facts hold dates, words, witnesses, and specific agreements. Impact captures how the moment touched your sleep, focus, and confidence. Next move is a doable action you can take today, not a grand fix. You’ll hear practical tools you can use right away, including a two‑line note after any incident—date, what happened, and its impact—that builds clarity over time. We share a simple script for clean communication: “For clarity, I’m going to summarise what we agreed in writing.” These small moves reduce confusion, support calmer conversations, and create a useful record if you ever need backup. The goal is not to harden your edges; it’s to bring steadiness to complex spaces so you can protect your energy and work with more ease. If you’ve been telling yourself it’s too complex for boundaries, this mini guide offers a kinder path forward. Try the buckets, pick one tiny action, and let progress be enough for today. If something here lands, keep it. If not, leave it. Either way, you’re allowed to move at your pace. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs calm clarity, and leave a review to help others find the show. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    5 min

  5. FEB 16

    Are You Exhausted from Fixing Their Moods? The Hidden Cost of the Rescue Reflex

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Ever walk into a meeting and feel the temperature drop even though no one says a word? We dig into the hidden labor of managing other people’s moods at work and offer a calmer path: stop chasing the weather and start owning your role. I share why smart, capable leaders overfunction when tension rises, how a single sigh can create an unofficial hierarchy, and what to do when your nervous system wants to appease, explain, or disappear. We get practical fast. You’ll learn a quick somatic reset—feel your feet, drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw—and a phrase to anchor your focus: “The mood is information, not instruction.” From there, we pivot to clean boundary language that keeps meetings productive without absorbing the emotional spillover. Try prompts like, “I want to keep this constructive. What decisions are we making, and what do you need from me?” You’ll see how this simple shift turns vague tension into actionable clarity and protects your energy for the real work. Throughout, we return to one steady idea: calm is not something you earn after a perfect week; it’s a practice you build in five quiet minutes. I invite you to notice what lands for you—no big declarations, just useful data you can use tomorrow. If you want more support, grab the emotional first aid kit at herguru.co.uk for scripts, micro‑exercises, and checklists that travel with you between back‑to‑backs. Subscribe, share this with a friend who keeps fixing the room, and leave a quick review to help others find the show. What boundary will you hold at your next meeting? The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    6 min

  6. FEB 13

    You Can’t Think Your Way Out Of Stress When Your State Is Wrecked

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Some truths are hard to say out loud: you can’t think your way out of stress when your state is wrecked. We close the series by getting honest about tired-brain traps, why exhaustion shrinks your options, and how to build a steady state that makes better choices possible without turning your life into a performance. If you’ve been “performing fine” while quietly unraveling, this conversation offers relief and a plan. We unpack how state acts as the filter for what you believe is possible, and why over-explaining, people-pleasing, irritability, and shutdown are not character flaws but load signals. From there, we draw a clean line between performing and role modeling: real role models are human and steady at the same time. We ask a clarifying question to anchor the months ahead: what one thing do you want to be true about you by the end of 2026? With that north star, “enough” becomes tangible—maybe you stop shrinking, tell the truth sooner, protect your dignity, or leave footprints instead of bruises. You’ll hear practical ways to support steadiness in real life: micro-rest between demands, simple boundaries that stick, smaller steps that still count, and rituals that calm the nervous system so your thinking can widen again. We explore the quiet power of moxie as footprints, not a spotlight—evidence built step by step, not a single dramatic leap. If you’ve felt like courage is missing, we invite you to check fuel first. Often it’s not a lack of bravery; it’s tiredness asking for care. Join us for a humane, grounded close to the series that gives you permission to be both human and steady. If this helped, subscribe, share it with a friend who’s running on fumes, and leave a review telling us your “one true thing” for 2026. Your steps matter, and progress is progress, no matter the pace. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    7 min

  7. FEB 12

    Who Benefits From Your Self-Editing?

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Ever been tagged as difficult, too much, cold, or not approachable and felt the air go out of the room? We pull those stickers off and look at what they hide: a culture that rewards performance of niceness and punishes clarity. Cheryl explores how labels become lazy shortcuts that shut down curiosity, and why the real trap is the meaning we attach to moments, not the facts themselves. We dig into practical reframes that change the story without gaslighting your experience. Maybe difficult means you asked for clarity. Maybe cold means you stopped performing free friendliness. Maybe emotional means you reacted like a human to pressure and disrespect. From there, we draw a sharp line between decorative confidence that looks great on a brochure and real moxie that challenges, sets boundaries, and stays whole. Clarity emerges as a form of kindness, because ambiguity breeds stress, invites projection, and keeps women overthinking themselves into exhaustion. If you worry that dropping the likability act will make people dislike you, you might notice some already do while you contort yourself for approval. So we ask the harder question: what is the cost of living as an edited version of you? We talk about moving faster with clear language, building steadier boundaries, and modeling integrity for younger women who need proof, not perfection. And we preview where this series lands next: even the best mindset collapses under exhaustion, so caring for your nervous system is non-negotiable. Join us to rethink the labels, reclaim your voice, and practice clarity that honors you and respects others. If this message landed, subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review so more people can find the show. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    7 min

  8. FEB 11

    Stop Owning What Isn’t Yours And Start Seeing Clearly

    Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. Ever feel like every problem at work lands on your desk and somehow becomes your fault? We go straight at that myth with a candid look at how stress narrows our lenses and turns systemic dysfunction into personal shame. From shifting goalposts and unclear expectations to politics, cliques, and conflict-avoidant managers, we unpack why capable women end up doing the team’s emotional admin—and how to stop carrying what was never yours. We start by creating distance: imagine your current situation playing on a cinema screen. From that vantage point, the patterns get loud—interruptions, information gatekeeping, double standards, and the quiet expectation that you will smooth things over after others make the mess. We draw bright lines between feedback and control, collaboration and compliance, and offer practical ways to reset norms: clarify expectations, document agreements, and right-size your load without apologizing for it. We also take on the hard truths. Sometimes speaking up does get punished, which is why “just be confident” is lazy advice. Instead, we map a strategy that blends courage and context: identify your risks, find allies, choose channels, and zoom out over a year to decide what truly matters. Do you want to remember a year spent shrinking, or a year spent staying yourself—even when it was uncomfortable? That’s the heart of sustainable leadership and the path to becoming a role model who leaves clear footprints for others to follow. Ready to trade self-erasure for clarity and boundaries that stick? Hit follow, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review to tell us one norm you refuse to normalize anymore. Your progress counts—no matter the pace. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers Support the show From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. “Every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a brighter, more balanced future. Trust your journey — progress is progress, no matter the pace.” — Cheryl Paris Subscribe, breathe, and repeat—every little bit counts! Support our work- Like us on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ and Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/

    8 min
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 From struggle to strength, with care you can feel. ABGW  stands for Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful. ABGW helps women who feel “not quite happy” in a life that looks good on paper move from survival mode to self-led strength, with practical tools, gentle humour, and zero fluff.  ABGW is Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful: A Trauma-Aware Project by Cheryl Paris. I work with women who feel misaligned in a life that’s “fine” but not fulfilling. Through conversations, coaching prompts, and small doable practices, I help you move from constant coping to steady, self-led living. Gentle where it matters, firm where it counts, always respectful of your pace. The names in shared stories have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals. Experiences are drawn from real events and are offered for reflection and education, not as medical or psychological advice. If you feel distressed, step away and seek appropriate support. Safety first. More information: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers

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