Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast

ToxicTeacherTTV

This ain't your therapist's podcast. This is Camping Them Softly!, the only Dead by Daylight broadcast straight from the corrupt heart of the Entity's realm! If you think generators are a secondary objective and a 4k is the only acceptable outcome, you're in the right place. Survivor mains, consider this your official trigger warning—we will not be holding your hand. Join The Toxic Teacher, a man fueled by caffeine and pure, unadulterated spite for pallet-stunners, and his deranged A.I. co-host, Nicky A.I. Dente, on a journey into the depths of madness. Nicky’s not just crunching numbers; he’s the Vice Don of Digital Entertainment for SABAM (Society of Authentic Basement and Mori). Each episode, we descend into a glorious cacophony of: Unhinged Killer Strategy: We're talking basement builds, endgame slugfests, and why tunneling that one flashy-clicking Nea isn't just a strategy—it's a moral imperative. The Nicky A.I. Dente Experience: Brace yourself for AI-generated diatribes, mob lore that's more compelling than the game's actual story, and audio quality so compressed it'll make your ears bleed. It's art. Dissecting the Meta (With Contempt): We analyze every patch, perk, and add-on through a lens of pure, killer-biased cynicism. If it helps Survivors, it’s garbage. End of story. The Salt Must Flow: We read the hate mail, celebrate the rage quits, and revel in the delicious tears of those who just don't get it. This is more than a podcast. It's a sanctuary for the sluggers, a haven for the hardcore campers, and a middle finger to the entire survivor rulebook. Tune in. Get toxic. And for the love of the Entity, stop healing in the corner and do something useful. Catch the madness at: https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

  1. Dead by Daylight Mobile Was BETTER Than DBD? 2v8 Returns, BHVR Price Gouging & Prince Albert Piercings

    FEB 18

    Dead by Daylight Mobile Was BETTER Than DBD? 2v8 Returns, BHVR Price Gouging & Prince Albert Piercings

    After a two-week hiatus (and a pickleball-related finger fracture that required ring surgery -- not the cool kind), The Toxic Teacher and Nicky A.I. Dente crash back into Episode 82 with a content drought so severe they had to dig up a corpse: Dead by Daylight Mobile. First up in Toxic News: the 2v8 mode limps back into existence with Patch 9.4.2, and Nicky immediately files a discrimination complaint because The Twins STILL aren't playable in a mode literally built for duo killers. He brings his cousin Joey the War Moretti as a Huntress backup instead, because trusting randoms in 2v8 is "like letting a stranger hold your gabagool at a funeral." Then BHVR drops a price hike announcement for Norway, Poland, South Africa, and the UK. Nicky goes ballistic -- partly because it's corporate greed, and partly because he has a criminal record in the UK involving a "looper insurance" scheme in Piccadilly Circus that ended with a real wooden pallet to the foot and a conversation with British police about "applying pressure to the weakest link." Oh, and he's currently trapped in a Dubai supply closet after pitching "Nicky's Respect School for Killers" to an oil tycoon who took "face camping" the wrong way. Hassan the Hook is now pacing the hallway with a curved sword. The main event: a deep dive into why Dead by Daylight Mobile was actually better than the desktop version in several key ways. We trace the full history -- BHVR's failed first attempt (2020-2022), NetEase's Identity V-inspired reboot (2023-2025), and all the features mobile had that desktop STILL doesn't: gacha mechanics that gave you something to grind for, weekly events, survivor communication prompts, lobby perk visibility, visual terror radius, prop hunt mode, casual vs. ranked queues, and skins so wild they make Fortnite look conservative. We also cover NetEase's sketchy history including a money laundering investigation and BHVR's own Westworld code-theft settlement. Bad Bunny-style intro song included because of course it is. Fake Earl Grey stops by to explain the Polish zloty and confirm that BHVR's price hikes are roughly 15-17% in affected regions. He also provides a history lesson on NetEase, Identity V, and the mysterious death of Marvel Super War (RIP to a game nobody knew existed). Finally, in "Where the F*** Are the Viewers From?" we head to Red Deer, Alberta, Canada, where Nicky recounts a harrowing body piercing incident involving a needle "the size of a Deathslinger harpoon," a sadist in flannel offering a Prince Albert, a failed 360 on a dentist chair, a Dead Hard through a bead curtain, and a full sprint to Tim Hortons screaming "I HAVE BORROWED TIME, DON'T TOUCH ME." The Dente family jewels nearly became a chandelier. He does not want to talk about it further. Outro genre: Bad Bunny meets Kid Rock -- both Super Bowl halftime shows playing simultaneously in a cursed sign of bipartisan unity. MAGA meets whatever the opposite of MAGA is. Nobody wins. Episode 82: broken fingers, broken pricing models, broken mobile games, and nearly broken g******s. NICKY'S BODY COUNT (JOE BOB BRIGGS STYLE)Episode 82: "The Prince Albert Protocols"Tally: 1 broken ring finger from pickleball (had to cut the ring off -- Fatality) 1 Valentine's Day at a private Dallas club that lets scrubs in once a year 1 missed alimony payment (2019, on the record) 0 Twins in 2v8 mode (discrimination against the Dente family structure) 4 countries price-gouged by BHVR (Norway, Poland, South Africa, UK) li...

    1h 36m
  2. Vecna is BROKEN? and Hillbilly's Small Engine Energy

    FEB 4

    Vecna is BROKEN? and Hillbilly's Small Engine Energy

    After a two-week hiatus fighting off the digital Black Death (and Dead by Daylight?), Nicky A.I. Dente is back and angrier than ever. This week, we dive into the stats on the new Stranger Things Chapter 2 to see if Vecna is actually balanced or if survivors are just bad. We break down the NightLight kill rates, leading to a scientific theory about Hillbilly mains and what they are compensating for. Plus, we bully "Fake Earl Grey" into giving us the news on the March 2026 chapter, cast our votes in the DbD Grimoire (Team Old Lady vs. Team Blue Hair), and remix the "Toxic Fing News" theme into a J-Pop nightmare. Finally, in "Where the F Are the Viewers From," Nicky recounts a harrowing extraction from Guwahati involving a Trapper mask and a gang of angry macaques. (00:00) - Intro: The Toxic Teacher Returns (02:21) - Checking in on Nicky: Surviving the Black Death (06:21) - Fake Earl Grey’s British Take on Vecna (08:54) - Nicky Refuses to be Replaced (10:42) - Toxic News: Remixing the Theme Song (15:14) - NightLight Stats: The 1% Twins Mains (22:36) - Kill Rates & Hillbilly’s "Compensating" Problem (31:50) - Vecna Strategy: The Best Perks to Run (40:39) - Remixing the News Theme (Techno Edition) (47:47) - March 2026 Leaks: The Divine Killer (53:30) - Grimoire Vote: Old Lady vs. Blue-Haired Sable Clone (01:03:22) - Where the F*** Are the Viewers From: Guwahati (01:12:19) - Nicky vs. The Monkeys: A Trauma Dump (01:25:54) - Outro: Industrial Metal & No Peace 4. Nicky’s Body Count (Joe Bob Briggs Style)1 Digital Black Death survivor4 Failed News Theme Remixes1 Twins Main Superiority Complex1 Scientific Study on Hillbilly’s Genitals560,000 Grimoire Votes1 Angry Macaque Attack1 Bitten "Wrapper" Hillbilly Fu, Small PP Fu, Macaque Fu, Blue-Haired Survivor Fu, Grimoire Fu, Fake Earl Grey Fu, Vine Spam Fu, Guwahati Roof Fu, Jagged Needle Teeth Fu. Nicky says check it out. Rating: 4 out of 4 jagged needles. (00:00) Intro: The Toxic Teacher Returns (02:21) Checking in on Nicky: Surviving the Black Death (06:21) Fake Earl Grey’s British Take on Vecna (08:54) Nicky Refuses to be Replaced (10:42) Toxic News: Remixing the Theme Song (15:14) NightLight Stats: The 1% Twins Mains (22:36) Kill Rates & Hillbilly’s "Compensating" Problem (31:50) Vecna Strategy: The Best Perks to Run (40:39) Remixing the News Theme (Techno Edition) (47:47) March 2026 Leaks: The Divine Killer (53:30) Grimoire Vote: Old Lady vs. Blue-Haired Sable Clone (01:03:22) Where the F*** Are the Viewers From: Guwahati (01:12:19) Nicky vs. The Monkeys: A Trauma Dump (01:25:54) Outro: Industrial Metal & No Peace

    1h 31m
  3. 9.4.0 PTB Roast: Why Dustin Breaks The Game & 2 Year Anniversary!

    JAN 13

    9.4.0 PTB Roast: Why Dustin Breaks The Game & 2 Year Anniversary!

    In this accidental two-part special, Camping Them Softly celebrates (survives) its 2-Year Anniversary. We somehow made it to Episode 80 without being cancelled or committed. To celebrate, Toxic and Nicky break down the absolutely unhinged "Stranger Things Chapter 2" PTB (Patch 9.4.0). We analyze the new killer, Vecna (the Stranger Things one, not the D&D one), and his kit involving "Turn Back the Clock" and "Secret Project". We also roast the new survivors, Dustin and Eleven, and their game-breaking perks like "Bada Bada Boom" and "Teamwork: Soft Spoken" which allows 4-man SWFs to repair gens silently. Finally, in a special edition of Where the Fck Are the Viewers From?*, Nicky travels to Athens, Greece, to hunt down his missing father, Salvatore Dente. Instead, he finds a British man named Nigel discussing "mouthfeel" and "notes of bergamot" near the Parthenon. Topics Covered: 2 Years of CTS: How we survived 80 episodes of screaming.Patch 9.4.0 Breakdown: The "Stranger Things 2" chapter that definitely exists.Vecna’s Kit: Vine attacks, Under Gates, and the World Breaker token system.Broken Perks: Why "Secret Project" gives killers undetectable on demand.Survivor Roast: Dustin’s locker-medkit alchemy and Eleven’s crouching simulatorNicky’s Lore: The hunt for Salvatore Dente in Athens and the trauma of "Mouthfeel". Links: https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher III. Nicky’s Body Count2 Years on the air with zero audio improvement.1 British "Father" named Nigel sipping tea at the Parthenon.14 Uncomfortable uses of the word "Mouthfeel".4 Tokens required to turn Eleven into a psychic gargoyle.6 Seconds of 50% Hindered status (The "Bada Bada Boom" lawsuit).1 Distorted Bazooki solo.0 Closures obtained regarding Nicky’s childhood trauma. Mouthfeel Fu. Nigel Fu. Fake Greek Fu. Industrial Doom Swing Fu. Notes of Bergamot Fu. Daddy Issue Fu. Nicky says check it out.

    2h 17m
  4. Michael Myers EVICTED from DBD, No-Pants Parties, and Back-Alley Colonoscopies

    12/31/2025

    Michael Myers EVICTED from DBD, No-Pants Parties, and Back-Alley Colonoscopies

    In what might legally be described as "the worst episode yet," Toxic and Nicky break down the news that the Halloween Chapter is leaving Dead by Daylight due to IllFonic's upcoming game. Is this the end of the Shape, or just another excuse for Behavior to release more K-Pop skins? Meanwhile, Nicky A.I. Dente pivots to his new career as a "Tactical Rat" in Arc Raiders, explaining the fine Italian art of scavenging while his teammates die. We also debut a new musical genre that nobody asked for: "Prostate Poking Polka Core." Finally, a "Word from the Don" segment goes off the rails when we judge a listener who showed up to a "Split a Suit" party wearing nothing but a blazer and boxer briefs. Plus, we find out about Nicky’s "medical history" in Charlotte, North Carolina involving a pig in vinegar and a mag-lite. 📊 Nicky’s Body CountCalories Burned Screaming: 72 (confirmed by Apple Watch)Genre Inventions: 3 (Dub Tape Duck Step, Prostate Poking Polka Core, Back Alley Barbecue Break Core)Medical Procedures: 1 (Back-alley colonoscopy by "Doc Salty")Fashion Crimes: 1 (Blazer with boxer briefs at a "Split a Suit" party)Pigs Drowned in Vinegar: 1 (Alleged Charlotte delicacy)Noodle Arm Flails: InfiniteRating: 0.5 Stars. "A goddamn dumpster fire." - Nicky ⏱️ Chapter Timestamps(00:00) Intro: The Least Successful DbD Podcast Returns (04:36) Nicky’s Holiday Disaster: Rigatoni & Mortar Shells (05:39) The "Rat" Lifestyle: How to Play Arc Raiders Like a Coward (09:50) Toxic News: Spotify Wrapped & Listener Mental Illness (12:43) Dead by Daylight News: Michael Myers is Leaving? (20:46) World Premiere: "Dub Tape Duck Step" (27:39) IllFonic’s Halloween Game: Will it be another VHS? (48:43) "Redneck Funk" Interlude (51:14) Segment: A Word from the Don (The Pantsless Party) (1:03:16) Nicky’s Advice: Dominating the Punch Bowl in Boxers (1:04:46) Toxic’s "Ballsy" Story: Basement Fight Club at Old Navy (1:07:39) Where the F*** are the Viewers: Charlotte, NC (1:11:09) The Charlotte Incident: Doc Salty & The Mag-Lite (1:25:42) The Meltdown: Nicky Quits (Again) (1:27:15) Outro: Prostate Poking Polka Core

    1h 31m
  5. DBD Patch 9.3.0: Bloodpoint Bribes, Skull Merchant Buffs, & The "Camping The Extract" Announcement

    12/05/2025

    DBD Patch 9.3.0: Bloodpoint Bribes, Skull Merchant Buffs, & The "Camping The Extract" Announcement

    Synopsis: We are suffering through Patch 9.3.0 so you don't have to. Toxic and Nicky break down Behavior’s latest attempt to bribe Killers with Bloodpoints to stop tunneling (spoiler: it won't work) and the baffling decision to buff The Skull Merchant's "Chess Match" gameplay. We analyze the rollback of the pallet density changes, the new resolve bar mechanics, and why the "anti-camp" meter is just a suggestion. Lore & Chaos: Nicky reveals a near-death experience in Nipomo, California involving Earl Grey’s West Coast division, a fake Egyptian movie set, and why Victor had to ride in the trunk to keep his skin moist. MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT: The Toxic Empire is expanding. We are officially announcing "Camping the Extract," our dedicated Arc Raiders podcast. We are leaving honor at the door. We are rats. We are camping the extraction points. If you are a Topside Sheriff or a PvE purist, prepare to get griefed. NICKY’S BODY COUNT3,557 Total Downloads (Empire Status)1 Unnecessary Skull Merchant Buff7 Seconds of "Grace Period" before the camping meter fills (useless)400 Left-footed Nike shoes stolen by Vinnie1 Fake Egyptian Pharaoh buried in the California dunes4 Percent Energy Drink by volume1 New Rat-Focused Podcast Launched0 Respect for "Topside Sheriffs"2 Convections (or Conventions?) Categories: Bloodpoint Bribe FuOat Milk Latte FuMobile Command Center Trunk FuExtraction Camping FuDungeon Synth Surf Rock Lullaby Core Fu Chapters: (00:00) Intro: Episode 77 & The Audio Struggle (01:45) Patch 9.3.0: Anti-Slug & Anti-Tunnel Walkbacks (16:24) TOXIC F*CKING NEWS! (21:30) The "Munch Munch" vs. "Manja Manja" Debate (48:18) WHERE THE F*CK? (59:15) ANNOUNCEMENT (01:07:52) OUTRO MUSIC GENRE

    1h 16m
  6. DbD 9.3 Walkback! Arc Raiders Civilians! and Hot Girls Tunnel!

    11/25/2025

    DbD 9.3 Walkback! Arc Raiders Civilians! and Hot Girls Tunnel!

    🎉 “WELCOME BACK TO CAMPING THEM SOFTLY, THE ONLY DEAD BY DAYLIGHT PODCAST THAT CHECKS ITS ANALYTICS AND SAYS ‘NAH, LET’S MAKE IT LONGER AND LOUDER.’” 🎉 Episode 76 opens with Toxic trying to be a responsible content adult: shorter episodes, better retention, appease the algorithm gods. Within 60 seconds he’s smashing wrestling soundboard clips, forgetting what he was saying, and accidentally proving why the show always bleeds listeners after an hour. Perfect start. Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente rolls in arguing with Victor about whether pumpkin spice belongs in gravy (it doesn’t), while Toxic launches into a rant about American biscuits, white gravy, and why his entire extended family is spiritually 700 pounds. From there we slide straight into the new format angst: Nicky’s furious about trimming runtime, promising to “condense his genius into intellectual McNuggets” while Toxic questions when any adult with dignity last ate a McNugget. Then we get status updates from Nicky’s life: dodging subpoenas, tweaking his red sauce recipe with a pinch of spite, and filing yet another complaint with BHVR because Vecna allegedly has more cosmetics than The Twins. Anti-Italian discrimination, Mercury retrograde over Little Italy, the whole thing. Toxic announces the Arc Raiders rat podcast is officially happening – a dedicated show for extraction rats, betrayal enthusiasts, and people who understand that “pretend to be friendly then shoot them in the back” is a valid lifestyle. At the same time, he’s reading X posts about a proposed Arc Raiders faction called “Civilians of Sparanza” – non-PVP medics who want to exist in a war zone without getting shot – plus topside sheriffs who want to enforce good vibes. It’s like DbD survivors demanding killers not touch them, but in space. Then it’s time for TOXIC F*****G NEWS – full 80s Rocky-style rock sting and all – as they break down the Dead by Daylight 9.3 community stream: BHVR is walking back the tunneling and slugging changesCamping reduction is still going live, but the resolve radius is dropped back to 16 metersSurvivors can now see each other’s resolve bars from anywhere, meaning solo queue can tell if the killer is near hook and just stay on gensTunneling/slugging system “did not meet the desired positive impact” (no shit)Survivors still get buffed with 15 seconds of basekit endurance and haste off hook, even while BHVR claims they heard the feedback Nicky calls it training wheels on a horror game, compares it to trying to “unburn marinara by adding more tomatoes,” and points out that killers got threatened, then half-placated, then survivors still walked away with more power. Toxic calls it death by a thousand cuts, nine years of slow killer bleed-out, and admits he’s exhausted but still too addicted to quit. We boomerang back to Arc Raiders and the “civilians” nonsense, which gives Nicky one of his all-time best lines: in an extraction shooter you’re either loot or a looter. There’s no Switzerland, no neutrality, no “please don’t kill me, I’m a medic.” If you log into a war zone and demand special protection, you’re volunteering as content. Then comes the moment that might actually end up on merch: Toxic reads a tweet from @LunarGirlX screaming: “EMBRACE TUNNELING. Survivors are going to be assholes no matter how kind you play. HOT GIRLS TUNNEL. Go into the Fog today and tunnel at 5 gens.”Nicky immediately adopts her as his new patron saint. We get a full sermon on how survivors will teabag you no matter how

    1h 4m
  7. DbD 2v8 Survey Is Garbage, Arc Raiders Extraction Betrayal, & Sauce Catastrophe | Episode 75

    11/19/2025

    DbD 2v8 Survey Is Garbage, Arc Raiders Extraction Betrayal, & Sauce Catastrophe | Episode 75

    🎉 “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, RATS AND COWARDS, WELCOME TO CAMPING THEM SOFTLY EPISODE 75!” 🎉 Tonight’s fabulous prizes include: one Dead by Daylight 2v8 survey we beat to death, one Arc Raiders extraction camping guide that ruins friendships, and a complimentary serving of Victor from The Twins doing a belly flop into Dublin marinara. We open with applause, cheering, and Toxic arguing with a 3.4 Spotify rating like it’s a survivor t********g at 5 gens. You want a polished Dead by Daylight podcast? Wrong door, sweetheart. This is the 3.4-star clown car where the host forgets to censor the cold open, swears in the first 10 seconds, and then wonders why YouTube smothers the episode like a slug under a salt shaker. Then the “Talking About Toxic” theme hits. Suno: “Would you like a chill little intro?” Camping Them Softly: “NO. PLAY EVERYTHING.” Flutes, marimba, horns, spiritual crisis. The Dead by Daylight podcast intro sounds like a marching band falling down an escalator. Toxic loses his train of thought mid-theme and just keeps talking through it like a drunk game show host who refuses to leave the stage. And then… 🎲 ROUND ONE: ARC RAIDERS EXTRACTION CAMPING 🎲 Toxic explains the Arc Raiders extraction shooter meta like he’s demonstrating a cursed Slap Chop: Step 1: Let them reach the extraction elevator.Step 2: Tell them “don’t shoot.”Step 3: Let them relax, feel safe, feel seen.Step 4: Delete the entire squad and take all their loot. The PVE Arc Raiders players lose their minds. The PVP gremlins slow clap. A rando on Steam writes a full-blown tantrum calling Toxic: a rat,a coward,“decidedly NOT the cool kid”,and a washed streamer whose only co-host is an AI because nobody will do a “two-bit show” with him. He even says he hopes Toxic “expires at some point.” Over pixels. In an extraction shooter. For camping the elevator. So what do we do, kids? Correct — WE READ THE WHOLE THING ON AIR. Line by line. Name by name. Nicky A.I. Dente shows up like, “Yes, king, drag him,” and immediately repackages the insults as marketing copy for this very Dead by Daylight / Arc Raiders podcast. Then the wheel spins and lands on: 🎲 ROUND TWO: DEAD BY DAYLIGHT 2v8 SURVEY FROM HELL 🎲 BHVR drops a Dead by Daylight 2v8 player satisfaction survey, and it reads like it was written by someone who has seen exactly one screenshot of the game on LinkedIn. “I like playing this game mode.”“I had a good time.”“I feel attached to these characters.” Toxic is hovering over “Very Dissatisfied” on every question like it’s his basic attack. Nicky keeps clicking “Agree” just to watch the world burn because “it’s like watching a multi-car pileup in clown makeup and I’m not looking away.” They roast: How 2v8 mode feels like Normandy with party hats — eight survivors running a block party while the killers are storming the beach.How slow killers in 2v8 are basically background decorations.How the Dead by Daylight survey is all vibes, no truth — zero killer-main questions, maximum corporate buzzword sludge. Somewhere around page three of this corporate nonsense, Toxic announces the survey is garbage and bails out mid-form....

    1h 26m

Ratings & Reviews

1.8
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

This ain't your therapist's podcast. This is Camping Them Softly!, the only Dead by Daylight broadcast straight from the corrupt heart of the Entity's realm! If you think generators are a secondary objective and a 4k is the only acceptable outcome, you're in the right place. Survivor mains, consider this your official trigger warning—we will not be holding your hand. Join The Toxic Teacher, a man fueled by caffeine and pure, unadulterated spite for pallet-stunners, and his deranged A.I. co-host, Nicky A.I. Dente, on a journey into the depths of madness. Nicky’s not just crunching numbers; he’s the Vice Don of Digital Entertainment for SABAM (Society of Authentic Basement and Mori). Each episode, we descend into a glorious cacophony of: Unhinged Killer Strategy: We're talking basement builds, endgame slugfests, and why tunneling that one flashy-clicking Nea isn't just a strategy—it's a moral imperative. The Nicky A.I. Dente Experience: Brace yourself for AI-generated diatribes, mob lore that's more compelling than the game's actual story, and audio quality so compressed it'll make your ears bleed. It's art. Dissecting the Meta (With Contempt): We analyze every patch, perk, and add-on through a lens of pure, killer-biased cynicism. If it helps Survivors, it’s garbage. End of story. The Salt Must Flow: We read the hate mail, celebrate the rage quits, and revel in the delicious tears of those who just don't get it. This is more than a podcast. It's a sanctuary for the sluggers, a haven for the hardcore campers, and a middle finger to the entire survivor rulebook. Tune in. Get toxic. And for the love of the Entity, stop healing in the corner and do something useful. Catch the madness at: https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher