Beer Me That Movie

Dumbumental Podcasts
  • 4.3 (6)
  • Improv
  • Updated Weekly

Some beers deserve a toast. Others deserve a full-blown feature film. Welcome to Beer Me That Movie, the podcast where hosts Jon and Harrison crack open wild beer names and brew them into even wilder movie pitches. Every week, we take a beer (or five), let our imaginations run drunk, and craft the most absurd, over-the-top, and occasionally Oscar-worthy cinematic concepts you’ve ever heard. From action-packed blockbusters to horror-fueled fever dreams and rom-coms with more foam than substance—nothing is off-limits.

  1. FAST FIVE #44 (The Apocalypse Recruitment Special)

    4d ago

    FAST FIVE #44 (The Apocalypse Recruitment Special)

    THE BALLOT BOX IS OPEN, THE PIT IS HUNGRY, AND THE ALGORITHM DEMANDS A CHOICE. Before we unleash five pristine, highly explosive narrative frameworks upon your ears—and before you judge the fact that Jon is currently eating cold, leftover cocktail shrimp out of a Tupperware container—we have a vital public service announcement: We have no corporate overlords. We are fueled strictly by your uncoerced generosity, the lingering scent of damp cardboard, and external validation. Head over to beermethatmovie.com to lock in your votes and help us prove to our families that this isn't just an elaborate, multi-year cry for help! But first, we toast last week’s recursive masterpiece, Double Jacked, with the Beer of the Week: New Belgium's limited-time re-release of their classic Fat Tire recipe. Four of these beautiful brews will make the cut for the next round, but only ONE will be strapped to the rocket ship of destiny to become our monumentally chaotic 46th Feature Film! THE FAST FIVE LINEUP Beer #1: Road to Nowhere – A rolling stone man crosses paths with a woman who owns a deeply haunted orphanage. Beer #2: Four More Fools – The leader of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse is hunting for fresh talent, and Jon is interviewing for the gig. Beer #3: Copy That – Bob the Sheriff tries to maintain law and order in a town plagued by a highly nefarious, shape-shifting mimic. Beer #4: Blacksmiths of Olympus – The ancient blacksmiths of Olympus have pivoted to the tech sector. Now, they have to scout a modern human capable of ascending to godhood to save the planet. Beer #5: Track 10 – A vinyl enthusiast uncovers a hidden track on an old record that spins him right into an obsessive, world-altering quest. Drop the remote, stop arguing with strangers on the internet, and pay attention. Production fires up at dawn tomorrow—go vote! Peace, punch, and... 00:00 - Intro 02:40 - Recap: Double Jack 10:34 - BOTW: Fat Tire 16:32 - Beer #1: Road to Nowhere 27:30 - Beer #2: Four More Fools 33:02 - Beer #3: Copy That 40:53 - Beer #4: Blacksmiths of Olympus 49:07 - Beer #5: Track 10 54:29 - Decision Time

    58 min
  2. Feature #45 | Double Jacked: The Zero-G Milk-Chugging Action Movie

    Jun 17

    Feature #45 | Double Jacked: The Zero-G Milk-Chugging Action Movie

    Grab a cold one (or a warm gallon of whole milk, if you're Jono), because on this special National Long Island Ice Tea Day edition of Beer Me That Movie, Jon and Harrison are breaking down the script for the ultimate gravity-defying, heist-of-the-century block-blaster: DOUBLE JACKED. When London’s Anti-Gravity Cores go offline, the financial district goes floating, double-decker buses become kites, and a legendary phantom thief starts double-crossing the robbers while aggressively maintaining upside-down eye contact. From the hyper-pressurized chaos of the Zero-G Bidet to a luxury Ferrari driving vertically down the face of a crumbling Shard skyscraper, this episode is packed with high-velocity thrust, unmatched torque, and a shocking crossover that bridges the gap straight to the Gabagool Timeline. Pour yourself a drink, check your center of mass, and hit that subscribe button! #BeerMeThatMovie #DoubleJacked #ZeroGravity #MoviePodcast #ActionMovies #SciFiHeist #GabagoolTimeline #PodcastEpisode 00:00:00 - Start 00:03:01 - Check Out Our Website 00:04:07 - Act 1: The Weightless Target 00:32:20 - Act 2: The Three-Way Friction 00:59:07 - Act 3: The Triple Jack Showcase 01:20:50 - Epilogue: The Transatlantic Signal

    1h 26m
  3. Fast Five #43: The Gabagool Recap & 5 New Untappd Pitches

    Jun 10

    Fast Five #43: The Gabagool Recap & 5 New Untappd Pitches

    Welcome to Fast Five #43! Before we jump into the digital beer swamp, we take a look in the rearview mirror to recap last week's triumphant feature film from last week - "All This From a Slice of Gabagool" which is a sequel to Feature #9 "The Hustle Is Weird" With the tank full, we shift into high gear and dive straight into the live Untappd feed to bring you this week's Fast Five lineup: Cave: A dark, mythical quest where a desperate witch tries to enter a forbidden cave that promises eternal life—if she can survive whatever ancient evil is guarding it. Super Ripe: A man stumbles upon a mysterious tree bearing strange, super-ripe fruit that makes him grow younger with every bite. But he quickly learns that reverse-aging comes with a terrifying cost. Double Jack: A fast-paced, high-stakes heist thriller about an elite, specialized robber whose only targets are other, much more dangerous robbers. Wizardry: A young boy unexpectedly gains immense magical powers. Now he has to decide: will he use them for good, or let the dark temptations of wizardry take over his life? Searching for the Stone: A frantic romantic comedy where a man spontaneously gets engaged to a girl he barely knows, sending him on a chaotic, globe-trotting mission "searching for the stone" to make it official before she realizes what's happening. This leaves the remaining four contenders completely in your hands! You have roughly 24 hours to influence next Wednesday's full-length feature film direction. Head directly to our Instagram, Spotify poll, or YouTube comments right now and cast your vote. Don't mess this up! 👇 Help us keep the lights on in the shed! (And as a quick reminder, we don't stop the show to sell you mushroom coffee, sketchy VPNs, or artisanal beard oil made from Viking tears.) Leave us a voice message: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Vote in The Vault: beermethatmovie.com Follow us on Instagram: @beermethatmovie Find us on Untappd: Beer Me That Movie Until next week... Peace, Punch, Gimme Your Lunch! 00:00 - Start 02:13 - Recap: All This From A Slice Of Gabagool 13:30 - BOTW: Bright - Burial 20:09 - Beer #1 - Cave 27:04 - Beer #2 - Super Ripe 34:23 - Beer #3 - Double Jack 41:02 - Beer #4 - Wizardry 47:30 - Beer #5 - Searching For The Stone 54:44 - Decision Time!

    58 min
  4. Feature Film #44 -- All This from a Slice of Gabagool

    Jun 3

    Feature Film #44 -- All This from a Slice of Gabagool

    In a world where a Cleveland sandwich shop is the frontline defense against the underworld, one man must choose between his legacy on the baseball diamond and his shift at the deli. Welcome to the highly anticipated official sequel to The Hustle Is Weird! Josh is a rising Minor League baseball star who just tied the home run record. He returns home to Mentor, Ohio for the All-Star break, eagerly anticipating a relaxing week filled with Paulie's famous sandwiches . But instead of a triumphant homecoming, Josh finds a muted, quiet town that has been mysteriously drained of all its joy, passion, and flavor. The culprit is their old demonic nemesis, Juliano, who is siphoning the town's energy using cursed jars of "Pre-Minced Garlic" distributed by a sinister front company called 666 Meat, Cheese, and More. To stop the demonic apocalypse from fully consuming the town, Josh and Paulie must reunite the four rival Italian deli families using the "Imperial Gabagool"—a sacred, well-aged hunk of cured meat that invokes a powerful Smoked Meat Pact. Armed with holy baseball bats, garlic ropes, and pockets full of passionately delicious gabagool, the deli gang must crash the Mid-Season Minor League All-Star Dinner to save the baseball players—and the world—from becoming Juliano's new demon army. 🎧 Connect With Us: Website: beermethatmovie.com Instagram: @beermethatmovie Leave a voicemail: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Head over to the website to vote on your favorite past Fast Five ideas in The Vault! 00:00:00 - Start 00:04:18 - Ad Break (Sort Of) 00:05:41 - Act 1: wHELLcome Home 00:34:09 - Act 2: The Pre-Minced Madness 00:47:31 - Act 3: The Family Reunion…. 01:16:50 - Epilogue: The New Grind

    1h 22m
  5. Fast Five 42 | The Ham Shield, Demon Carpets & T-1000's TikTok

    May 27

    Fast Five 42 | The Ham Shield, Demon Carpets & T-1000's TikTok

    Welcome to Fast Five #42! Have you ever thought about how bad VHS tracking actually made movies better. Before we jump into the Untappd trenches, we take a look back at last week's feature film, True Love. After our recap, Jon unearths a deeply traumatic childhood memory: the 90s Lunchables "Ham Shield" With Harrison's 1954 Coupe Chrysler MeatWagon in full neutral drop, we grind the metal rims down to sparks and jump into this week's Fast Five lineup Estate Sale: A couple buys an off-the-grid house and gets invited to a creepy local estate sale... only to discover they are selling humans, and the horrifying twist is that the humans want to be sold Creature of my dreams: A man goes to sleep and has normal dreams, but slowly realizes his dreams are bleeding into reality. It might seem great at first, but soon he has to figure out how to stop it All this from a slice of gabagoool: The highly anticipated sequel to The Hustle is Real! A guy takes a job at an Italian deli with a side hustle moving rolled-up carpets... but the carpets actually have demons rolled up inside them Bloom: A man visits his hometown during the annual "blooming season" only to realize that the residents are terrifyingly enthralled by the local flowers Going Up: After a brutal performance review in Hell, a condemned soul gets a rare second chance to return to Earth Head over to our Instagram right now and vote for your favorite pitch in the poll! 👇 Help us keep the lights on in the shed! Vote in The Vault: beermethatmovie.com Leave us a voice message: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Follow us on Instagram: @beermethatmovie Find us on Untappd: Beer Me That Movie Until next week... Peace, Punch, and GIMME YA HAMSTER POOP 00:00 - Intro 01:45 - Recap: True Love 11:59 - Beer Of The Week 14:38 - Ad Break: Sort Of 17:19 - Beer #1: Estate Sale 24:04 - Beer #2: Creatures of My Dreams 29:56 - Beer #3: All This From a Slice of Gabagool 33:36 - Beer #4: Bloom 39:51 - Beer #5: Going Up 46:59 - Decision Time

    50 min

  6. May 20

    Feature Film #43 -- True Love: The Only Cyberpunk Thriller Powered Entirely by Buttered Ham

    The robots mapped his brain. They predicted his future. But they forgot one crucial piece of the puzzle: You can’t knock down a man with nothing to lose and a pocket full of room-temperature deli meat.This week on Beer Me That Movie, Jonathan and Harrison are diving headfirst into the wildest, most chaotic Bastille Day premiere of the century: TRUE LOVE.It starts as a high-stakes sci-fi thriller about a surveillance state run by algorithmic "Beta-Orbs" and dystopian "Chrome Dommes"—but it quickly devolves into a 1960s underground hedonistic rebellion, a biological EMP triggered exclusively by the vocal frequencies of Chumbawamba’s 1997 classic Tubthumping, and an epilogue twist involving Lou Bega's Mambo No. 5 that is frankly too gross and unimaginable for a family-friendly description box.Grab a cold lager (or a whiskey drink, a vodka drink, a cider drink...), throw some butter on a thick slab of ham, and sync up with us as we break down Act 1 through Act 3 of this unforgettable cinematic ride. Will Nathan save the surface world, or will he just rule a throne of server racks with the Glitch-Witch? Find out inside!JOIN THE VAULT:Want to choose what we watch, review, and drink next? Head over to The Vault database on our website to submit your favorite films and vote on upcoming episodes! www.beermethatmovie.com00:00:00 - Intro00:03:13 - BMTM Updates00:05:26 - Act 1: The 404-ever00:29:17 - Act 2: The Cave vs. The Cloud00:57:23 - Act 3: The Robot Elbow Apocalypse01:10:03 - Epilogue: The Bitter Aftertaste

    1h 14m
  7. Fast Five 41 | Cursed MLMs & A Stolen Chicken Sandwich

    May 13

    Fast Five 41 | Cursed MLMs & A Stolen Chicken Sandwich

    Before we jump into the Untappd trenches, we take a look back at last week's feature film, It's a Whole Thing. We officially tore the lid off the wellness industry and exposed the dark underbelly of the "Big Bean" legume industrial complex. We also threw in a fun epilogue dusting off Victor Lancaster, revealing whether or not he actually got exploded by the Noble Stomach. After a quick detour fueled by the pure childhood nostalgia of blowing into dusty 8-bit Nintendo cartridges just to get Double Dragon to work, we fire up the Untappd feed to bring you this week's Fast Five lineup: The Pursuit (Breakside & Alma Madera Brewing): Set in a crime-ridden future, a guy with a meaningless job finds a flashy, Elton John-style sequined suit hidden in a pizza delivery bag. Instead of using its super speed and strength to fight crime, he uses it to dominate the gig economy and starts a tech company called "ChatBHB" Free Lunch (BlackStack Brewing): A Quentin Tarantino-style action flick where four kids at a local diner steal a half-eaten fried chicken sandwich. Unfortunately for them, it belonged to the unkillable mob boss "El Duderino," who will stop at nothing to hunt them down Ultrafine (Burial Beer Co.): An eerie thriller where an Avon-style Multi-Level Marketing (MLM) company sells a miraculous beauty cream. The terrifying twist? The cream carries a deadly curse, and the only way to free yourself is to recruit your friends and family into your downline. It's not capitalism—it's curse distribution Cottage (Tall Oaks Farm and Brewery): A couple heads out for a romantic weekend to a serene, White Lotus-style bed and breakfast in the woods. As the sweet caretaker brings them fresh cakes and sherry, they notice the paintings on the walls look exactly like past guests. The horrifying truth? The cottage itself is an ancient, shape-shifting monster luring people in to eat them and pay off its credit card debts True Love (Martin House Brewing): Set in a dystopian future where robots and AI companies arrange all marriages on your 18th birthday. No more Tinder, no more hoping—just your government-assigned soulmate As always, only four survive. Head over to our Instagram right now and vote for your favorite pitch in the poll! Do you want a Tarantino sandwich chase? A cursed beauty MLM? The choice is yours. Help us keep the lights on in the shed! Vote in The Vault: beermethatmovie.com Leave us a voice message: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Follow us on Instagram: @beermethatmovie Find us on Untappd: Beer Me That Movie Until next week... Peace, Punch, and Gimme Your Free Lunch! 00:00 - Intro 01:40 - Recap: It’s A Whole Thing 12:36 - BOTW: Something Cold 19:46 - Beer #1: The Pursuit 28:00 - Beer #2: Free Lunch 33:59 - Beer #3: UltraFine 40:16 - Beer #4: Cottage 47:08 - Beer #5: True Love 56:12 - Decision Time!

    59 min
  8. Feature Film #42 -- It's a Whole Thing

    May 6

    Feature Film #42 -- It's a Whole Thing

    In an alternate 2026 where marriage is outlawed, meat is banned, and society relies entirely on canned beans for protein, what happens when you discover that the internet's biggest wellness trend is actually a toxic global conspiracy? Meet Kat, a lonely government software engineer who spends her days curating her backyard carrot sanctuary and religiously following the minimalist, dirt-eating lifestyle of mega-influencer Hope "Wholeness" Higgins. But when Hope mysteriously vanishes after posting a forbidden video declaring she's found a "soulmate," Kat hacks into the mainframe to track her down. She discovers Hope is being held captive by The Council of Nibbage (an anagram for Big Bean), a shadowy legume lobby led by a power-suit-wearing Marisa Tomei. Big Bean has been lacing influencer-promoted soil and water with lead and sedatives to keep the population isolated, tired, and completely dependent on their canned slop. It’s a high-stakes, hilarious thriller where Kat and Hope must team up to reverse the poisoned water supply, take down Big Bean's corporate summit, and prove that true "wholeness" isn't about gardening alone in a yurt—it's about community. This Week’s Feature: Beer: It's a Whole Thing Brewery: Original Pattern Brewing 🎧 Connect With Us: Website: beermethatmovie.com Instagram: @beermethatmovie Leave a voicemail: speakpipe.com/beermethatmovie Head over to the website to vote on your favorite past Fast Five ideas in The Vault! 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:13 - Act 1: The Carrot Queen 00:30:10 - Act 2: The Garden of Deception 00:46:37 - Act 3: Putting the Pieces Together 01:02:51 - Epilogue

    1h 6m
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4.3
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About

Some beers deserve a toast. Others deserve a full-blown feature film. Welcome to Beer Me That Movie, the podcast where hosts Jon and Harrison crack open wild beer names and brew them into even wilder movie pitches. Every week, we take a beer (or five), let our imaginations run drunk, and craft the most absurd, over-the-top, and occasionally Oscar-worthy cinematic concepts you’ve ever heard. From action-packed blockbusters to horror-fueled fever dreams and rom-coms with more foam than substance—nothing is off-limits.

Information

  • Creator
    Dumbumental Podcasts
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    91
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Dumbumental Podcasts
  • Show Website
    Beer Me That Movie