Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence

Johnny Lawrence
  • 0.0 (0)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Weekly

Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence is a podcast about understanding yourself. Each week, Johnny explores the psychology, emotions and hidden patterns behind why we think, feel and behave the way we do, answering a listener's question on topics like people-pleasing, overthinking, anger, confidence, relationships and purpose. Once a month, he's joined by a special guest for deeper conversations and fresh perspectives. Because lasting change begins by understanding why you do what you do. New episodes every Wednesday.

  1. 3d ago

    172. Why Do I Keep Making the Same Mistakes? | Malachy Dunne on Behaviour Change

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I sat down with Malachy Dunne to explore why changing our lives often requires unlearning the very things we've spent years believing. We discuss how childhood experiences shape adult behaviour, why crisis and grief can become catalysts for growth, and the important difference between accepting reality and simply resigning ourselves to it. Malachy shares insights from his own journey, including sobriety, recovery and the process of developing greater self-awareness. We also explore why information alone rarely changes us, how to interrupt automatic reactions, and why recognising that we have a choice can be the beginning of genuine freedom. Because sometimes the biggest obstacle to becoming someone new is everything we've learned to believe about who we are. Takeaways 👉 Realisation can be more powerful than information. Knowing something intellectually isn't the same as truly understanding it. 👉 Acceptance isn't resignation. You can acknowledge reality without giving up your ability to influence what happens next. 👉 Change often requires unlearning. We need to question the beliefs, behaviours and mental models we've carried for years. 👉 Self-awareness creates space for choice. Recognising your automatic reactions gives you an opportunity to respond differently. 👉 Crisis can become a catalyst for growth. Difficult experiences don't automatically make us stronger, but they can invite us to reconsider how we live. Lifetime Therapy https://www.lifetimetherapy.co.uk/  Signed Copy Pre-order from West End Lane Bookshop https://www.welbooks.co.uk/shop/p/why-do-i-do-this-a-guide-to-building-a-stronger-relationship-with-yourself-by-johnny-lawrence-signed?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAcGRvZgJzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA85MzY2MTk3NDMzOTI0NTkAAadhSDmiWGqPgQROIxePqSe_eZFab36Wz1d-XDbCgunh-F-Kq0VH9uSAqYBFtQ_aem_Yzk9gJzJhtzKVqtUrbDGUg  JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Kindle Pre-Order https://amzn.eu/d/0i3FBvUX  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  2. Oct 21

    171. Why Don’t I Know Who I Am Anymore? | Identity & Self-Discovery

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore what happens when the roles and responsibilities that have defined our lives begin to change, and we realise we're no longer sure who we are without them. Whether you're a parent, partner, professional, or the person everyone depends on, it's easy to focus so much on meeting expectations that you lose touch with your own needs, values, and ambitions. I share practical ways to reconnect with yourself, understand what truly matters to you and rebuild self-trust through small, intentional actions. Because your roles are part of who you are, but they don't have to define all of who you are. Takeaways 👉 Your roles aren't your identity. You can be a parent, partner, or professional without letting those roles define your entire sense of self. 👉 Knowing your values gives you direction. When life changes, your values can help you decide what matters and where to go next. 👉 You can be dependable without abandoning yourself. Looking after your own needs doesn't make you selfish or unreliable. 👉 Small, honest questions can reveal a lot. Asking what you want, what matters and what you're avoiding can help you reconnect with yourself. 👉 Change may disappoint other people. Their reactions don't automatically mean you're making the wrong decision. Signed Copy Pre-order from West End Lane Bookshop https://www.welbooks.co.uk/shop/p/why-do-i-do-this-a-guide-to-building-a-stronger-relationship-with-yourself-by-johnny-lawrence-signed?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAcGRvZgJzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA85MzY2MTk3NDMzOTI0NTkAAadhSDmiWGqPgQROIxePqSe_eZFab36Wz1d-XDbCgunh-F-Kq0VH9uSAqYBFtQ_aem_Yzk9gJzJhtzKVqtUrbDGUg  JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Kindle Pre-Order https://amzn.eu/d/0i3FBvUX  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  3. Oct 14

    170. Why Do I Need Everyone to Like Me? | People-Pleasing & Self-Worth

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore why we can become so dependent on other people's approval that we start losing touch with who we really are. I look at the difference between wanting approval and needing it, how people-pleasing can leave us feeling disconnected from ourselves, and why the fear of rejection can lead us to hide our opinions, compromise our boundaries and become whoever we think others want us to be. Most importantly, I explore how to build self-trust, develop internal approval and create more authentic relationships. Because the goal isn't to stop caring what people think. It's to stop allowing what they think to determine how you feel about yourself. Takeaways 👉 Wanting approval is human; depending on it can become a trap. The problem begins when other people's opinions determine your self-worth. 👉 People-pleasing can leave you feeling lonely. When you perform to be accepted, people may connect with the version of you that you've created rather than the person you really are. 👉 Rejection isn't a verdict on your worth. Sometimes you're simply not the right fit for someone else. 👉 Self-trust reduces the need for external validation. The more you trust your own judgement, the less you need others to confirm that you're making the right choices. 👉 Authenticity requires the courage to risk disapproval. You can respect other people's opinions without abandoning your own. JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Kindle Pre-Order https://amzn.eu/d/0i3FBvUX  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  4. Oct 7

    169. Why Do I Keep Punishing Myself for the Past? | Self-Forgiveness

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore why we can become trapped by regret, replaying old mistakes and judging our past selves with the knowledge we have today. We look at the difference between regret and rumination, why context matters when looking back, and how comparing ourselves to an imaginary version of where we think we “should” be can keep us stuck. I also share practical ways to reframe your past, practise self-forgiveness and use what happened then to change what happens next. Because you can't change what happened. But you can change what it means. Takeaways 👉 Regret can teach you; rumination keeps you stuck. 👉 You judged your past self with the knowledge you have today. Context matters. 👉 Self-forgiveness doesn't require approval. You can accept what happened without excusing it. 👉 Your imaginary timeline isn't reality. Stop comparing your life to where you think you should be. 👉 The past can become information, not an identity. Ask: What can I learn, change and do next? JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Kindle Pre-Order Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  5. Sep 30

    168. Why Am I So Afraid to Be Myself? | Nina Aouilk on Trauma & Self-Acceptance

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I sit down with Nina Aouilk, a life coach and survivor of profound trauma, to explore her remarkable journey from homelessness and adversity to self-love, faith and purpose. Nina shares how childhood trauma, fear and painful experiences shaped her identity, and what it took to begin rebuilding her life. We explore the courage it takes to live authentically, the importance of boundaries and why learning to say no can be an act of self-respect. We also discuss emotional regulation, spirituality, healing and the power of small, consistent steps. Finding yourself is less about becoming someone else and more about finding the courage to be who you really are. Takeaways 👉 Facing your fears can open the door to change. Growth often begins when you stop allowing fear to make your decisions. 👉 Your past doesn't have to define your identity. Healing can help you separate who you are from what you've experienced. 👉 Authenticity requires courage. Being yourself can mean risking rejection, but it can also bring a deeper sense of fulfilment. 👉 Saying no is an act of self-respect. Healthy boundaries help you protect your values, energy and emotional wellbeing. 👉 Small steps can create lasting change. You don't need to transform your entire life overnight to begin moving in a new direction. Nina’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/londonslifecoach/?hl=en  JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  6. Sep 23

    167. Why Do I Keep Getting in My Own Way? | Understanding Self-Sabotage

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore one of the most misunderstood patterns in human behaviour: self-sabotage. What if you're not actually trying to sabotage yourself? What if the behaviour you're calling self-sabotage is actually an attempt to self-soothe, pulling you back to something familiar and comfortable when fear or uncertainty feels uncomfortable? I explore how behavioural loops, identity, familiarity, and fear can keep us repeating patterns we know aren't helping us, and why success can sometimes feel more threatening than failure. Most importantly, I look at how curiosity and self-awareness can help us interrupt those patterns and develop healthier responses to discomfort. Takeaways 👉 Self-sabotage may actually be self-soothing. We often return to familiar behaviours because they help us regulate discomfort, even when they don't serve us. 👉 Familiar doesn't always mean healthy. We can become more comfortable with what we know than with what we actually want. 👉 Fear can sit underneath self-sabotaging behaviour. Change, success and uncertainty can all trigger protective responses. 👉 Your behaviour can become a loop. Triggers create familiar responses, which create familiar outcomes, until you notice the pattern. 👉 Curiosity creates choice. Instead of asking, “Why am I doing this to myself?”, ask, “What is this behaviour trying to do for me?” JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  7. Sep 16

    166. Why Do I Keep Calling Myself Lazy? | Understanding Burnout & Avoidance

    In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore one of the questions many of us secretly ask ourselves: “Am I actually lazy, or is something else going on?” I look at the difference between burnout, exhaustion, avoidance and genuine unwillingness, and why calling ourselves “lazy” often stops us from understanding what’s really getting in the way. We explore how fear, overwhelm, depleted energy and lack of clarity can all look like procrastination. I also share two practical tools, the Energy Avoidance Check and the Ten-Minute Rule, to help you understand your resistance, take action, and respond to yourself with more honesty and compassion. Takeaways 👉 Burnout is depletion, not laziness. When your capacity is genuinely depleted, pushing harder isn't always the answer. 👉 “What’s getting in the way?” is a better question than “Why am I so lazy?” Understanding the cause gives you something you can actually work with. 👉 Avoidance can be driven by fear. Sometimes we aren't unwilling to act; we're afraid of what acting might mean. 👉 Small actions create momentum. You don't always need motivation before you begin; sometimes motivation follows action. 👉 Learn the difference between inability and unwillingness. Honest self-awareness helps you know when you need rest and when you need to take responsibility. SIGN UP TO MY NEWSLETTER HERE https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/newsletter  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

  8. Sep 9

    165. Why Do I Get So Disappointed by People? | Understanding Expectations

    Why do we get so disappointed when people don't behave the way we expected? In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore how expectations shape our relationships, emotions and experiences, and why we often treat our predictions about other people as if they were promises. We look at the difference between preferences, expectations and boundaries, why unmet expectations can reveal deeper needs, and how communicating those needs can prevent unnecessary disappointment. I also share a practical framework for examining your expectations and learning to respond to reality rather than constantly fighting it. Because disappointment isn't always a problem to fix. Sometimes it's information about what you need. Takeaways 👉 Expectations are predictions, not promises. 👉 Disappointment can reveal an unmet need. 👉 Communicate your needs instead of expecting others to guess. 👉 Preferences, expectations and boundaries are different. 👉 Emotional flexibility means learning to accept reality. SIGN UP TO MY NEWSLETTER HERE https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/newsletter  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin

See All (174)

Trailer

About

Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence is a podcast about understanding yourself. Each week, Johnny explores the psychology, emotions and hidden patterns behind why we think, feel and behave the way we do, answering a listener's question on topics like people-pleasing, overthinking, anger, confidence, relationships and purpose. Once a month, he's joined by a special guest for deeper conversations and fresh perspectives. Because lasting change begins by understanding why you do what you do. New episodes every Wednesday.

Information

You Might Also Like