If you were to name some of the most wicked sins a person could commit, what would make your list? Listen to Paul's own list in Romans 1:29-30, They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malicefull of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousnessgossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. Some of you are thinking,I dont think disobeying your parents belongs in that lineup.Yet sandwiched between haters of God and inventors of evil we find disobedient to parents. And Paul says it again in 2 Timothy 3:1-2, Understand this, in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents. Twice, in two different letters, Paul puts disobedience to parents in the list describing how wrong the world has gone. Church, the fifth commandment reveals a general principle, that respect and honor are owed to every authority God has placed over us. And God, in His wisdom, so ordered it that the very first classroom for learning this principle would be our homes, with the very first authorities we ever meet, our parents. Before we go further, I need to correct two assumptions most people bring to this fifth commandment. First, many hear honor your father and mother and think only of children. They picture a child, sitting before their parents, who are telling them to clean their room. Is that what the fifth commandment is all about? Now, children need this text, more than they know, no doubt. But if children isallyou think this command speaks to, youve missed it. The fifth commandment is not the children's sermon of the Ten Commandments. No, you never graduate from this commandment. Youll always be under authorities in this life. Yes, we begin with our parents, but then we along with our parents we encounter other authorities in life: teachers, bosses, pastors, police, government, ultimately ending with God Himself. Second, many have a negative attitude towards authority, some even go as far as to say the very first time we hear of authority in the Bible is after our fall into sin in Gen. 3:16 when God says Adam shall rule over his wife. So, like the physical consequences of childbirth and wearisome labor in a world of thorns and thistles, many believe the authority of one human over another is a curse of the fall.[1] I can understand such a view, but it simply isnt correct. Authority of one over another wasnt a consequence of the fall, no way. Before the fall we see Adams headship over Eve as she is made from him and then given to him as a gift to have and hold, to love and lead, not as dictator but as her own husband. Can authority between husband and wife, or any authority in this world grow corrupt and be manipulated in the wrong direction? Of course it can. But the mere exercise of authority is not the same as the abuse of it. All in all, nobody in this room this morning is exempt from the fifth commandment. We find the commandment in Exodus 20:12, which says, Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you. Two headings this morning to see and embrace: The Command, and The Promise. See first The Command The very first thing we must say about the fifth commandment is that its a transition point, or a hinge point. The first four commandments are called the first table of the law, which teaches us how to love God: no other gods, no idols, no blasphemy, keeping sabbath. The final six commandments are called the second table of the Law, which teaches us how to love our neighbor: no murder, no adultery, no theft, no lying, no coveting. Yet notice what begins the second table, the commandment to honor your father and mother. This teaches us much. All our love towards our neighbor is founded on the parent-child relationship because its the first relationship any of us have, and because it shapes every relationship that comes after it. Clearly here we see the significance of the family. In v12 there is one father, one mother, and children who are to honor them. Thats the design. Why does this matter so much? Because obedience to parental authority is, fundamentally, obedience to God Himself. You cannot call yourself a follower of Christ and treat your parents authority as optional. Obedience to parents was so serious in the OT that God prescribed the death penalty for children who cursed their parents (Ex. 21:17, Lev. 20:9). In the NT Jesus rebukes the Pharisees who arranged a system where one could think theyre obeying the fifth commandment while leaving their parents uncared for (Matt. 15:3-9). Why such severity? Because in dishonoring our parents, we dishonoring God, which is no small thing. Think about the authorities in your life right now. Theres God, who deserves your worship above all else. Theres the government, who have been placed over us to bear the sword of steel. Refusing to submit to them, whether or not we like whos currently in office, is refusing to submit to the Lord put them there (Rom. 13:1-7). Theres the churchs pastors and elders, who God has placed over us to bear the sword of the Spirit. Refusing to submit to them is, refusing to submit to the Lord who put them there (Heb. 13:17). Theres teachers, who ought to be shown a great deal of respect while youre in the classroom. Theres employers and bosses of all kinds, who arent to be mocked but listened to and obeyed as well. And theres the elderly, who arent to be warehoused and forgotten in an institution, but honored and cared for till the end. Where does all the honor were to show to these authorities begin? The fifth commandment says, at home. Thus, the home is to be the proving ground where we learn the art of honoring for the first time.[2] And how important it is to learn it there. Because if a child doesnt honor authority at home, we should not be surprised if that child doesnt honor authority anywhere else. Show me an employee who is lazy, dishonest, and impossible to correct, and nine times out of ten, youre looking at a how that person related to authority as a child. Clearly this commandment, while beginning at home, extends far beyond it. How kind of the Lord, then, to build this into our lives here in the fifth commandment. And how urgent it is for us, then, to relearn the ways godly family life.[3] The Hebrew word for honor in v12 iskabod. It literally means weight, or heaviness. Its the same word the authors of Scripture use to describe Gods glory. You hear that? Gods very glory, beauty, reputation, the sheer gravity of who He is. Thats this word. And here in the fifth commandment its applied to our parents. What does this do to the command? It brings a weightiness to it, a gravity to it, a high importance to it. This is one of the Ten Commandments after all, which remember, is not a suggestion. I think we get the weight of honor commanded here. But lets ask a different question now. What does living this out look like? What does carrying this weight look like? In his Bible commentary Matthew Henry, lists many ways to carry out this commandment. Here are a few of them.[4] Respect What is this? To respect is to have and maintain an inward esteem for our parents that shows up outwardly in how we relate to them. This looks like speaking kindly of your parents in public and private instead of mocking them behind their backs. It looks like listening when they talk instead of checking your phone, or rolling your eyes at them. This takes work to maintain and the work usually gets harder, not easier, as we get older because the older we get the more we think we know and the less we think our parents know. Proverbs 30:17 says we disobey the fifth commandment to our peril, The eye that mocks a father, and scorns to obey a mother will be picked out by the ravens of the valley and eaten by the vultures. Honoring our mother and father looks like respect. Obedience This is so often seen as a bad word by Christians, left only for things like dog training. Obedience is not resentful or forced coercion, or a bare compliance without love which is its own kind of dishonor. Obedience is cheerful, willing, and immediate compliance. Ephesians 6:1 affirms this saying, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Matthew Henry says it like this to kids, Come when they call, go where they send you, do what they ask you to do, and refrain from what they forbid.[5] Proverbs 6:20-22 puts it beautifully, My son, keep your fathers commandment, and forsake not your mothers teaching. Bind them on your heart always, tie them around your neck. When you walk they will lead you, when you lie down they will watch over you, when you awake they will talk with you. Perhaps we have forgotten, or havent ever thought of it, but our parents have usually walked through terrain we havent. Theyve made mistakes theyd love to spare us from. To drown out their voice with the noise of your own opinions is to dishonor them and ensure your own folly. Honoring our mother and father looks like obedience. Submission This word is also usually seen as a negatively, as a strong word where one party forces their will onto another. Is that what this means for the parent child relationship? No. Rather, this word speaks to what will leads ought to lead children. In themselves they want this or that, to go here or there, yet in it all they are to submit to their parents will. The hardest arena this occurs in is discipline. Hebrews 12 makes the case: no discipline feels pleasant in the moment, but it trains us, it teaches us, and one of the greatest lessons we learn in it is how God Himself disciplines those He loves. If parents love their children, theyll discipline themif children love their parents, theyll submit to them. If youre a parent who refuses to discipline your children,