The Sharegiving Secret: How to Survive Family Caregiving

Deborah Greenhut, PH.D.
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

The Sharegiving Secret provides practical advice so that caregivers don’t have to go it alone. Hosted by best-selling author of The Rational Caregiver, Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD, each episode shares caregivers’ highs and lows with listeners. Service providers and experienced family caregivers offer solutions you can use. Whether you are a caregiver or realize that someday you might be or need one, “The Sharegiving Secret” offers inspiring stories and lifelines from family caregivers. Join us weekly to discover the practical side of this labor of love. Let’s enlarge the circle of help.

  1. May 26

    Ep 61: Caregiving without Self-Sacrifice: Kim Lackie on Stress, Boundaries, and the Body's Warnings

    In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Kim Lackie about the hidden cost of caregiving and the importance of learning to pause before the body breaks down under stress. Kim brings a powerful blend of lived experience and professional insight. With a 26-year career in law enforcement and experience raising triplets, she understands what it means to live under pressure while caring for others. She explains how stress can show up as physical pain, exhaustion, reactivity, decision fatigue, and nervous-system overload. The conversation explores practical ways caregivers can begin restoring themselves in very small increments: five minutes of breathing, a quiet shower, a walk in nature, asking someone for thirty minutes of help, or pausing before reacting. Kim also discusses box breathing, emotional tracking, boundaries, unconscious patterning, and the importance of self-leadership. A central message emerges: caregiving may be a labor of love, but it should not require the caregiver to disappear. As Deborah and Kim discuss, caregivers need systems, support, boundaries, and a new way to measure energy before burnout becomes illness. Key TopicsCaregiver burnout and survival modeThe mind-body connectionPhysical pain as a stress signalBox breathing and nervous system regulationAsking for help without guiltBoundaries and energy exchangeDecision fatigueUnconscious patterning and people-pleasingSelf-leadership for caregiversCommunity resources and practical support Guest Resource MentionedKim Lackie offers The Path Forward, a resource focused on unconscious patterning, journal prompts, and self-leadership for making decisions from inner authority rather than old programming. Free for your audience: The Path Forward Workbook Link: https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton Website Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/ Facebook-Personal Profile-Kim Lackie: https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr FB page-Sovereign Path Alchemy https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr IG-Kim Lackie1: https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr LinkedIn-Kim Lackie: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app YouTube channel-Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Kim Lackie about the hidden cost of caregiving and the importance of learning to pause before the body breaks down under stress. Kim brings a powerful blend of lived experience and professional insight. With a 26-year career in law enforcement and experience raising triplets, she understands what it means to live under pressure while caring for others. She explains how stress can show up as physical pain, exhaustion, reactivity, decision fatigue, and nervous-system overload. The conversation explores practical ways caregivers can begin restoring themselves in very small increments: five minutes of breathing, a quiet shower, a walk in nature, asking someone for thirty minutes of help, or pausing before reacting. Kim also discusses box breathing, emotional tracking, boundaries, unconscious patterning, and the importance of self-leadership. A central message emerges: caregiving may be a labor of love, but it should not require the caregiver to disappear. As Deborah and Kim discuss, caregivers need systems, support, boundaries, and a new way to measure energy before burnout becomes illness. Key TopicsCaregiver burnout and survival modeThe mind-body connectionPhysical pain as a stress signalBox breathing and nervous system regulationAsking for help without guiltBoundaries and energy exchangeDecision fatigueUnconscious patterning and people-pleasingSelf-leadership for caregiversCommunity resources and practical support Guest Resource MentionedKim Lackie offers The Path Forward, a resource focused on unconscious patterning, journal prompts, and self-leadership for making decisions from inner authority rather than old programming. Free for your audience: The Path Forward Workbook Link: https://www.canva.com/design/DAHAUXC5n6I/kej50ZbCL_meROLMTLSZTw/edit?utm_content=DAHAUXC5n6I&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton Website Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://sovereignpathalchemy.com/ Facebook-Personal Profile-Kim Lackie: https://www.facebook.com/share/19XCC5at98/?mibextid=wwXIfr FB page-Sovereign Path Alchemy https://www.facebook.com/share/1aEWQ2NnaA/?mibextid=wwXIfr IG-Kim Lackie1: https://www.instagram.com/kimlackie1?igsh=MTF1YmN3eGIwMG1sOA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr LinkedIn-Kim Lackie: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kim-lackie000075512?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app YouTube channel-Sovereign Path Alchemy: https://youtube.com/@sovereignpathalchemy?si=ghFnfEP2cbJs1Ehq

    23 min
  2. The Hidden Crisis of Widowhood: Carol McGehe on Widows Fog, Purpose, and Living Forward

    Apr 7

    The Hidden Crisis of Widowhood: Carol McGehe on Widows Fog, Purpose, and Living Forward

    Widowhood is more than grief—it’s disorientation, invisibility, and loss of identity. Widow’s advocate Carol McGehe shares insights on “widows fog,” rebuilding purpose, and how community care transforms lives. Carol’s ministry, Living Forward, offers a compelling example of how structured compassion, social connection, and practical support can restore dignity, identity, and purpose. This episode is essential listening for caregivers, families, faith communities, and anyone seeking to better understand the emotional and practical realities of widowhood. Bio: CAROL McGEHE lives with her husband Larry in Daytona Beach, FL. Carol is the founder of The Vine Church’s Living Forward Ministry for Widows and consults to help others begin widows’ ministries in their local communities. She and Larry are co-authors of the award-winning Christian historical novel, In Search of My Heart, the first book in the In Search series. In addition to writing and serving as a Widows’ Advocate, Carol enjoys traveling, Bible Study, playing pickleball, boogie boarding, and spending time with friends. Website links and other social media: McGehe Books (Carol McGehe)_ “Becoming A Widows’ Advocate”: Website/ordering: McGeheBooks.com/Widows_Advocate/ Email: McGeheBooks@gmail.com McGehe Books (Larry & Carol McGehe)_ “In Search of My Heart”: Website/ordering: https://McGeheBooks.com Email: McGeheBooks@gmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/insearchseries YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@McGeheBooks Instagram: https://instagram.com/mcgehebooks #caregiving #thesharegivingsecret #widowsadvocate #DeborahSGreenhut #widows #postcaring

    19 min

  3. Mar 26

    Ep 59 When Love Isn’t Enough: Why Caregivers Need a Plan

    In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret™, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Ryan Riggins, a senior transition advisor, real estate professional, and creator of a caregiver-focused planning blueprint. Together, they explore one of the most overlooked truths in caregiving: 👉 Love does not create systems. Ryan shares practical, hard-won insights from working with families navigating housing transitions, financial decisions, and emotional resistance. From the first difficult conversation to protecting a family’s largest asset, this episode offers both clarity and caution. 📚 Guest Resources Section Website: rigginsstrategicsolutions.com Book: The Unheard Conversation Blueprint + calculators: https://www.rigginsstrategicsolutions.com/the-blueprint Senior Safe App (daily check-in + caregiver tools) https://www.rigginsstrategicsolutions.com/seniorsafe-app About Dr. Deborah Greenhut Author of The Rational Caregiver and host of The Sharegiving Secret, Dr. Greenhut helps individuals “learn to speak their life” through narrative. Deborah's guide for caregivers, "The Rational Caregiver" is available in print on Amazon and in e-format on Kindle. www.deborahgreenhut.com and www.memoirmomentum.com #Caregiving #Sharegiving #AgingParents #CaregiverSupport #NarrativeCompetence #TheSharegivingSecret-TM

    45 min

  4. Mar 21

    Ep 58 When One Person Does It All: Why Caregiving Breaks Families

    Why does caregiving so often become a one-person job? In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret, Dr. Deborah S. Greenhut speaks with Nancy LeClair, founder of The Other Daughter, about the hidden dynamics that push caregiving onto a single family member—and the devastating emotional, financial, and relational consequences that follow. Drawing on Nancy’s background in market research, hospital and home care, and family mediation, this conversation explores: Why families default to a “primary caregiver” modelHow unshared care leads to burnout, resentment, and long-term family riftsThe ethical and financial realities of unpaid caregiving laborWhy neutral third parties can save families from turning on one anotherThe urgency of planning before crisis strikes This episode is a candid, compassionate look at why caregiving must be shared—and how families can begin having those conversations now. Nancy LeClair is the founder of The Other Daughter, a caregiving consulting practice that helps families navigate elder care without sacrificing relationships. With experience in hospital care, home care, and family mediation, Nancy advocates for proactive planning, fair distribution of caregiving labor, and the use of neutral third parties to prevent burnout and family fracture. Social Media: Website: www.theotherdaughter.ca LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/theotherdaughter Instagram: nleclairtheotherdaughter Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD is a speaker, author, educator, and three-time family caregiver devoted to helping caregivers create fairer, healthier ways of caring—without losing themselves in the process. Through storytelling and practical frameworks, she helps caregivers rethink boundaries, rebalance responsibilities, and reclaim wellbeing. She is the author of the Amazon bestselling book The Rational Caregiver and the host of the podcast The Sharegiving Secret, where honest conversations illuminate how care can be shared, sustainable, and humane. Deborah's book, The Rational Caregiver, is available on Amazon at this link in both Kindle and Print formats. #TheSharegivingSecret #Caregiving #FamilyCaregiving #CaregiverBurnout #ElderCare #SandwichGeneration #InvisibleLabor #CaregivingSupport #ShareTheCare

    26 min
  5. Rhythmic Resilience: Caregiving Lessons from Musician Maritri Garrett | 005

    Mar 15

    Rhythmic Resilience: Caregiving Lessons from Musician Maritri Garrett | 005

    In Memoriam 3-14-2026. The world lost a sonbird today. This episode is being rebroadcast in memory of our friend, Maritri Garrett. Her story: Jumping into caregiving transformed her life in ways she never expected! Chatting with Maritri Garrett, a musician turned caregiver, I dove deep into how she balances her creative passions with the demands of caring for her parentless nieces and her own parents during family crises. Maritri shares that self-care isn't just a nice-to-have; it's essential. Her story of adjusting life on the fly, incorporating rigorous self-care routines inspired by choreographer Twyla Tharp’s book, truly resonates with anyone in the throes of caregiving. If you’re finding caregiving to be a juggling act of emotional and physical demands, Maritri’s approach to maintaining her sanity through music, routine, and self-care is a testament to the power of resilience and creativity in the face of life’s unexpected turns. About Maritri: Maritri Garrett is a remarkable independent artist whose music reflects the depth of her diverse musical background. As a composer, multi-instrumentalist, singer, and educator, her songs tell honest stories of life, love, and loss, offering healing and solace to all who listen. Maritri holds a unique blend of academic achievements, including a Bachelor of Arts in Biology from Fisk University, a Bachelor of Science in Composition, and a Master of Fine Arts in Jazz Studies from Howard University. Her skillful versatility with instruments like the piano, guitar, bass, cello, and percussion sets her apart. Having performed with and opened for musical legends like Gladys Knight and Patti LaBelle, Maritri continues to captivate audiences with her emotionally powerful compositions and soulful performances. https://www.instagram.com/maritrimusic/ https://www.tiktok.com/@maritrimusic https://www.threads.net/@maritrimusic https://www.facebook.com/MaritriMusic https://www.facebook.com/maritri About Me: I have cared for many family members across the life span, experiencing the joys and challenges of child-rearing, the poignance of caring for parents, friends, and elder partners. I realized that I could not handle the stress of family caregiving 24/7/365. It was time for a new approach to caring. My health and happiness were slipping away. This is how Think to Thrive for Caregivers evolved. Let your mind meet your heart so you don’t lose track of your life. Connect with Me: https://www.deborahgreenhut.com/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborahgreenhut01/ Find my books here Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a comment in the section below! Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. You can also subscribe in your favorite podcast app. Leave us an Apple Podcasts review Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on Apple Podcasts, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on Apple Podcasts.

    19 min

  6. Jan 28

    When Caregiving Begins Too Early: Dr. Eugene Manley on Advocacy, Health Equity, and Surviving the System

    What happens when caregiving begins before childhood is even finished? In this deeply human and eye-opening conversation, Dr. Eugene Manley Jr. shares what it was like to become a caregiver as a child—and how those early responsibilities shaped his empathy, career, and lifelong commitment to health equity. A biomedical scientist and founder of the STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation, Dr. Manley bridges lived experience and professional expertise as he reveals: How early caregiving forces children into adult rolesWhat happens when even highly educated patients are failed by the healthcare systemWhy caregivers need real-time advocates, not just paperworkHow burnout, income loss, and systemic bias disproportionately affect underserved familiesWhy storytelling, information-sharing, and community are survival tools for caregivers. Dr. Manley has actively turned lived caregiving into action through health equity work. Caregivers are not invisible—and their stories are not small. This episode is a reminder that advocacy begins with being seen, heard, and supported. BIO: Dr. Eugene Manley Jr. is a biomedical scientist, health equity advocate, and founder of the STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation. Raised in inner-city Detroit and shaped by early caregiving experiences, he now works to improve health literacy, diversify the STEM workforce, and reduce disparities in cancer care through education, advocacy, and community-centered programs. Links: STEM & Cancer Health Equity Foundation: info@secchq.orgSocial Media: STEMCCHQ (Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn)LinkedIn: Eugene Manley Jr., PhD Hashtags: #TheSharegivingSecret #CaregivingStories #HealthEquity #CaregiverAdvocacy #PatientRights #HealthcareJustice

    28 min

  7. Jan 25

    Ep 56 Be Kind to Yourself: Why Caregivers Need the Primal Five to Survive

    Caregiving quietly asks people to disappear—and then praises them for it. In this episode of The Sharegiving Secret, host Deborah Greenhut, PhD speaks with Dr. Matthew Campbell, licensed psychologist and co-author of Our Primal Five, about why caregivers are uniquely vulnerable to depletion, isolation, and hopelessness—and what actually helps. Drawing from clinical work with dementia caregivers, personal family experience, and decades of research, Dr. Campbell introduces the Primal Five: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and consumption. These are not luxuries, he argues, but biological requirements caregivers often abandon without realizing it. Together, Deborah and Matt explore: Why caregivers struggle to even hear advice meant for themselvesHow caregiving becomes invisible solo labor over timeWhy praise and faith language can unintentionally trap caregiversThe difference between depression and the far more dangerous state of hopelessnessHow families can spot early warning signs that a caregiver is in trouble This is a compassionate, practical, and deeply human conversation about restoring visibility, choice, and kindness—to the caregiver. Bio Dr. Matthew Campbell is a licensed psychologist, author, and founder of Our Primal 5, a practical self-care framework focused on the five foundations of mental and physical health: sleep, sunlight, movement, social connection, and consumption. With years of clinical experience, Dr. Campbell helps people cut through overwhelm and focus on small, sustainable behaviors that improve mood, energy, and resilience. His work bridges science and real life—offering structure without rigidity and progress without perfection. Dr. Campbell is the co-author of Our Primal 5: The Simple 5-Week Guide to Self-Care, and his mission is simple: help people feel better by doing less—but doing the right things consistently. Social Website: https://www.campbellps.com/our-primal-5 Book: https://a.co/d/8w3z5KX

    45 min

  8. Jan 14

    Ep 055 The Story You're Living Inside as a Caregiver

    Caregiving is shaped as much by the story we tell ourselves as by the tasks we perform. In this solo episode, Dr. Deborah Greenhut explores how unconscious caregiver narratives—hero, martyr, fixer, invisible one—quietly determine burnout, resentment, and motivation. Listeners are guided to examine the story they are living inside, identify where it no longer serves them, and begin revising it with clarity, self-respect, and choice. Caregivers rarely choose their role intentionally—but they do live inside a story about what that role means. In this episode, Deborah Greenhut introduces the idea that motivation, exhaustion, and even guilt are often consequences of the narrative a caregiver has inherited or adopted without consent. Using a coaching lens grounded in the Rational Caregiver framework, this episode helps listeners identify their dominant caregiving story, understand how it shapes behavior, and begin rewriting it in a way that restores agency. This is not about doing more—it’s about seeing differently. #CaregiverStory #CaregiverBurnout #CaregivingSupport #TheRationalCaregiver #CaregiverCoaching #CaregiverIdentity #CaregiverMotivation #FamilyCaregiving

    12 min
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The Sharegiving Secret provides practical advice so that caregivers don’t have to go it alone. Hosted by best-selling author of The Rational Caregiver, Deborah S. Greenhut, PhD, each episode shares caregivers’ highs and lows with listeners. Service providers and experienced family caregivers offer solutions you can use. Whether you are a caregiver or realize that someday you might be or need one, “The Sharegiving Secret” offers inspiring stories and lifelines from family caregivers. Join us weekly to discover the practical side of this labor of love. Let’s enlarge the circle of help.

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