The Divorce Decision Podcast

Kari Hoskins
  • 5.0 (10)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

If you’re contemplating divorce, wondering whether your marriage can be rebuilt, or trying to make a clear decision without acting out of panic, fear, guilt, or pressure, this podcast is for you. The Divorce Decision Podcast is for people in unhappy, uncertain, or emotionally painful marriages who are asking one of the hardest questions of their lives: Should I stay, or should I go? Hosted by Kari Hoskins, a professionally certified relationship coach with a Master’s Degree in Interpersonal Communication, this podcast takes an honest, balanced look at the real dynamics behind divorce decisions. We talk about the marriage patterns, communication breakdowns, emotional disconnection, conflict cycles, resentment, trust issues, infidelity, and unresolved pain that lead couples to this crossroads. You’ll hear conversations about:  how couples get here  what rebuilding a marriage actually looks like  what separation and divorce can look like  how to communicate when everything feels fragile  how to make a thoughtful, clear, regret-aware decision  What makes this podcast different is simple: there is no agenda here. No pushing you to leave. No pressuring you to stay.  Because the truth is: leaving is scary, and staying is scary. This podcast is here to help you slow down, understand what’s really happening in your relationship, and make one of the most painful and important decisions of your life with more clarity, honesty, and self-trust. Kari has advanced training in couples coaching, trauma, relational coaching, conflict, infidelity, PTSD, and addiction, offering compassionate, grounded support for people facing the heartbreak, confusion, and complexity of relationship crossroads. If you are struggling in your marriage, questioning divorce, or trying to figure out whether repair is possible, The Divorce Decision Podcast will give you practical insight, emotional clarity, and a more balanced conversation about staying, leaving, and everything in between.    

  1. 6d ago

    Ep. 57: The Missing Map For Couples Considering Divorce

    If you've been asking yourself, "Should I stay or should I leave?" over and over again, this episode is for you. Many people spend four to five years contemplating divorce before making a decision. The problem isn't that you can't make up your mind—it's that you're trying to answer one question without realizing you're actually moving through a process. In this kickoff episode of my six-part series, I introduce The Six Stages of the Divorce Decision—the framework I use to help people understand where they are, why generic marriage advice often misses the mark, and what to focus on based on the stage they're in. In this episode, you'll learn: Why feeling torn doesn't necessarily mean you're confused—it may mean you're in transition.How understanding your stage can bring clarity and direction.Why the advice that's helpful in one stage can be completely wrong in another.A brief overview of all six stages, from A Knowing to Decision Point.This series isn't about convincing you to stay in your marriage or leave it. My goal is to help you understand what's happening beneath the surface so you can make the decision you'll regret the least—and move forward with greater confidence, clarity, and peace. If you haven't already, take the Should We Get a Divorce? quiz at kahoskins.com to discover which stage you're in. Then join me next week as we take a deeper dive into Stage One: A Knowing. Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  2. Jul 16

    Ep. 56: 3 Things Your Unhappiness Is Teaching You

    If you're unhappy in your marriage, it's easy to get stuck pointing at the obvious stuff — the dishes he won't do, the phone she won't put down, the sex you're not having, the way he shuts down every time you bring something up.  But what if the behavior isn't actually the problem? In today's episode, I break down three things your unhappiness is trying to teach you — if you can stop focusing on the unhappiness itself long enough to hear it. First, I talk about how almost every complaint is hiding an unmet need. "I need you to get a job" is rarely about the job — it's about not wanting to carry the family alone. "Can you put your phone down" is rarely about the phone — it's about wanting to feel like you're still chosen. I'll walk you through how to ask yourself the follow-up question that gets you to what you're actually missing: connection, partnership, to feel desired, to not feel alone. Second, I talk about the pattern running underneath your issues — the one where you bring something up and he gets defensive, so you get louder, so he shuts down further. Or where you avoid saying the thing to keep the peace, until it comes out sideways over coffee on a random Sunday morning. I'll ask you to shift from "what is my spouse doing wrong" to "how do I show up when I'm hurt" — because that's where the real clarity lives. Third, I talk about agency — and how many of us have quietly handed ours over while we wait. Waiting for him to initiate. Waiting for her to soften. Waiting for the apology that never really lands. I'll ask you what you're choosing every time you stay silent, avoid the hard conversation, or accept the same non-apology on repeat. My hope is that by the end of this episode, you're not asking "should I leave," but something more useful: what do I actually need, what have I already tried, and what am I no longer willing to keep repeating? Because the goal isn't to make a fast decision about your marriage — it's to make a clear one.   Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  3. Jul 2

    Ep. 55: Is Your Conflict Normal? 3 Questions to Ask Yourself

    Is the fighting in your marriage normal — or is it a sign of something deeper?  Today, I'm answering one of the questions I get asked most by walking you through three simple signs to check in your own relationship. You'll learn: ·       Why the topic of a fight matters less than whether it stays on topic — and what it means when small arguments turn into old, unrelated hurts ·       The real difference between couples who repair after conflict and couples who just go quiet and move on without ever really moving on ·       Why silence, not yelling, is often the bigger warning sign in a struggling marriage ·       Three honest questions to ask yourself this week to get a clearer, more accurate read on where your marriage really stands This episode isn't about deciding if your marriage is doomed. It's about helping you see the pattern clearly, so you can stop guessing and start telling yourself the truth about what's actually happening. Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  4. Jun 25

    Ep. 54: Are You the Pursuer or the Withdrawer in Your Marriage?

    What if the biggest problem in your marriage isn’t the topic you keep fighting about… but the pattern you fall into every time you try to talk about it? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, I’m breaking down the pursuit-withdrawal cycle — also called the demand-withdraw cycle — and why it can quietly create resentment, loneliness, panic, shutdown, and emotional distance in a marriage. This is the pattern where one spouse pushes for answers, connection, reassurance, repair, or change… and the other spouse pulls away, shuts down, gets defensive, goes silent, or leaves the conversation altogether. And here’s the hard part: both people usually feel completely justified. The pursuer feels abandoned, dismissed, and like they’re the only one who cares. The withdrawer feels pressured, criticized, overwhelmed, and like there is no right answer. Over time, this cycle can make both spouses feel like victims — and both become more convinced the other person is the problem. In this episode, I’ll help you recognize which side of the cycle you may be on, why this pattern escalates so quickly, why silence can feel like peace when it’s actually disengagement, and what it takes to begin interrupting the cycle before it causes deeper damage. And if you’re in the complicated middle — wondering if your marriage can be repaired or if you’re moving toward divorce — this episode will help you see the pattern more clearly so you can decide what needs to happen next.   Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  5. Jun 18

    Ep. 53: Hard Season or Marriage Crossroads? Here's How To Know

    Is your marriage going through a hard season, or are you standing at a real crossroads? In this episode of The Divorce Decision Podcast, Kari Hoskins helps you tell the difference between a temporary rough patch and a deeper marriage crisis. When you’re unhappy, disconnected, resentful, or emotionally exhausted, it can be hard to know what is actually happening. Is this stress? Is it burnout? Is it parenting, money, grief, or a difficult year? Or has something more serious shifted in the relationship? Kari explains why this distinction matters so much. If you treat a hard season like a marriage-ending crisis, you may make decisions from fear or exhaustion. But if you treat a true crossroads like “just a rough patch,” you may stay stuck for years, waiting for things to magically get better while resentment continues to grow. In this episode, you’ll learn the signs of a hard season, the signs of a marriage crossroads, and the difference between a passing divorce fantasy and the deeper shift that happens when divorce becomes something you are seriously considering. This conversation is for anyone who has been asking, “Should I stay? Should I go? Is this fixable? Or am I avoiding the truth?” You do not need to have the answer today. But you do need a clearer way to understand the question. Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  6. Jun 11

    Ep. 52: Unhappily Married? Stop Doing These 3 Things Before It Gets Worse

    Unhappy marriages don’t usually fall apart overnight. They often deteriorate through small, repeated patterns that become part of everyday life. In this episode, Kari shares three things to stop doing if you’re unhappy in your marriage: belittling or demeaning your partner, keeping score, and avoiding conversations when issues are still small. These habits may feel understandable when you’re hurt or resentful, but they quietly add fuel to the fire. They create more disconnection, more resentment, and make it harder to know whether your marriage can actually be repaired. Kari explains why stopping these patterns doesn’t magically fix everything, but it does help “stop the bleed.” Your daily life can feel calmer. Your conversations can become more productive. And whether you choose to rebuild or separate, you’ll be making decisions from a clearer place. Take the free “Should We Get a Divorce?” quiz at kahoskins.com to find out where you are in the divorce decision process. Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  7. Jun 4

    Ep. 51: Can Your Marriage Be Saved? The Question of Desire

    In the final episode of the Can This Marriage Heal? series, Kari tackles the question that keeps people up at night: If real change were possible, would you actually want to stay? This isn't a question about whether your marriage can be fixed. It's a question about whether you want it to be — and those are very different things. In this episode you'll learn:  The difference between desire and obligation, Why showing up out of duty alone will quietly make things worse, not better.What it sounds like when someone is motivated by fear versus genuine desire Why you can do all the right things and still end up right back where you started What it actually takes to sustain real, lasting repair.Because here's the truth: a marriage doesn't heal just because two people love each other. It heals when both people are willing to become the kind of people who can make it work. If you're somewhere between we have problems and I think I might be done — this episode will help you figure out which one is actually true. Take the free Should We Get a Divorce? quiz to find out what stage of the decision-making process you're in Takt it here: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

  8. May 28

    Ep. 50: Can Your Marriage Be Saved? One Thing You Can't Ignore

    Can Your Marriage Be Saved? One Thing You Can't Ignore Are you wondering if your marriage can be fixed — or if it's already too late? In this episode of the Divorce Decision Podcast, host Kari Hoskins digs into one of the most important questions you need to answer before you can even think about saving your marriage: Is there still respect between you and your spouse? You might not feel in love right now. You might not even like each other very much. But without respect, repair is almost impossible — and Kari explains exactly why. In this episode, you'll learn: ·       Why respect matters MORE than love when it comes to saving your marriage ·       7 warning signs that respect has already broken down in your relationship ·       The difference between frustration and contempt — and why it matters ·       How to know if YOU are still open to seeing your spouse differently ·       What "openness" really means (hint: it's NOT the same as forgetting or forgiving everything) This is part two of a three-part series on can your marriage be saved. If you're not ready to give up but you're not sure if there's still hope, this episode is for you. Take Kari's free quiz — Should We Get a Divorce? — at kahoskins.com Should We Get A Divorce Quiz: https://kari-hoskins-coaching-llc.kit.com/9e533cdd68 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karihoskinscoaching/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kari.lifecoaching/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4A7XJcQEYfTh3E43IIw7Bg/about Website: https://www.karihoskinscoaching.com

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About

If you’re contemplating divorce, wondering whether your marriage can be rebuilt, or trying to make a clear decision without acting out of panic, fear, guilt, or pressure, this podcast is for you. The Divorce Decision Podcast is for people in unhappy, uncertain, or emotionally painful marriages who are asking one of the hardest questions of their lives: Should I stay, or should I go? Hosted by Kari Hoskins, a professionally certified relationship coach with a Master’s Degree in Interpersonal Communication, this podcast takes an honest, balanced look at the real dynamics behind divorce decisions. We talk about the marriage patterns, communication breakdowns, emotional disconnection, conflict cycles, resentment, trust issues, infidelity, and unresolved pain that lead couples to this crossroads. You’ll hear conversations about:  how couples get here  what rebuilding a marriage actually looks like  what separation and divorce can look like  how to communicate when everything feels fragile  how to make a thoughtful, clear, regret-aware decision  What makes this podcast different is simple: there is no agenda here. No pushing you to leave. No pressuring you to stay.  Because the truth is: leaving is scary, and staying is scary. This podcast is here to help you slow down, understand what’s really happening in your relationship, and make one of the most painful and important decisions of your life with more clarity, honesty, and self-trust. Kari has advanced training in couples coaching, trauma, relational coaching, conflict, infidelity, PTSD, and addiction, offering compassionate, grounded support for people facing the heartbreak, confusion, and complexity of relationship crossroads. If you are struggling in your marriage, questioning divorce, or trying to figure out whether repair is possible, The Divorce Decision Podcast will give you practical insight, emotional clarity, and a more balanced conversation about staying, leaving, and everything in between.    

Information

  • Creator
    Kari Hoskins
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    58
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Divorce Decision Podcast
  • Show Website
    The Divorce Decision Podcast