The Next Podcast: Moving Forward with Grief and Loss

Jay Cookingham
  • 5.0 (3)
  • Christianity
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to The NEXT Podcast with Jay Cookingham—a heartfelt journey through grief, loss, and healing. After the devastating loss of his wife, Christine, Jay shares raw, honest reflections on navigating life without her. Each episode explores how grief can become a teacher of resilience, inviting lament and revealing moments of grace in the deepest sorrow. With vulnerability and compassion, Jay offers encouragement to anyone walking the path of loss, reminding you that you are never alone on the journey toward healing.

  1. 2d ago

    Episode 68: The Things Grief Doesn’t Take

    Grief takes a lot. It can take a person, a marriage, a future we thought we were going to have, familiar routines, dreams, confidence, and sometimes even our sense of who we are. But grief doesn’t get everything. In this episode, I’m thinking about the things grief didn’t take from me—and the things it doesn’t have the authority to take from you. Grief didn’t take God. It didn’t take my identity in Christ. It didn’t take my ability to love. It didn’t take my voice. It didn’t take every possibility for joy, hope, creativity, relationship, or a future. That doesn’t mean those things are always easy to access. Grief can make them feel distant. But there is a difference between something being difficult to experience and something being gone. Loss is not the same thing as emptiness. So maybe it’s worth asking ourselves: What did grief not take? What remains? What is still true? What is still alive? Grief gets a chapter in our story. But it doesn’t get the final word. God does. God is good. He is always good. And He always answers out of His goodness. We need to learn to trust His definition of good as we move forward. Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland.

  2. Aug 31

    Episode 67: Who Do You Need?

    After losing Christine, Jay realized he hadn’t just lost his wife—he had lost his person. The one he automatically turned to, shared life with, and allowed to know him deeply. In this episode, Jay talks honestly about the uncomfortable realization that he needs people. Not someone to replace Christine, but people who can occupy new and different places in his life. He explores the tension between isolation and connection, the lie that protecting ourselves is the same as healing, and what it means to allow God to bring people alongside us as we move forward. Through a tender story about holding his grandson Ayden, Jay discovers that sometimes we show up thinking we are the ones comforting, only to discover that God is comforting us through someone else. This is an episode about loneliness, community, vulnerability, and the courage to receive. “I don’t need a replacement for the person I lost. I need the courage to receive the people God has placed—and will place—in my life.” Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland.

  3. Aug 18

    Episode 66: Behind the Tough Face

    We’ve all heard the phrase "be strong," but what happens when strength becomes a mask we use to hide our weariness, pain, and grief? In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, host Jay Cookingham dives deep into the heavy, unspoken burden of carrying a "tough face”. Drawing from his own visceral experience standing in a receiving line for over two hours at his late wife Christine's memorial service, where he found himself comforting others instead of being comforted. If you've ever felt the pressure to hold it all together while breaking inside, this episode offers grace-filled permission to drop the badge of honor of false strength. Jay shares practical, pastoral steps for evaluating your responsibilities, setting healthy boundaries, and transferring the weight off your shoulders onto Jesus. Because true strength isn't about pretending to be unbreakable, it’s about relying on His power in our weakness. Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland You can buy my grief devotional, NEXT: Lamentations and Devotions, here: https://a.co/d/07sA61P5

  4. Aug 4

    Episode 65: Learning to Receive Again

    After deep loss, grief doesn't just teach us how to let go—it often teaches us to hold back. We become cautious with joy. We hesitate to dream. We struggle to receive kindness, hope, or even moments of peace because our hearts have learned what it feels like to lose someone we love. In this episode, Jay reflects on a surprising lesson from his own grief journey: learning to receive again. Through the tender story of holding his newborn grandson for the very first time, Jay shares how joy and sorrow can exist together without competing. While grieving the absence of his wife, Christine, he discovered that God's goodness often arrives quietly—not by removing our grief, but by placing new gifts beside it. If you've ever wondered whether it's okay to laugh again, hope again, or embrace the life God is still giving you, this conversation is for you. Receiving isn't forgetting. Receiving isn't replacing. Receiving is trusting. Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast,you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing yoursupport and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland

  5. Jul 21

    Episode 64: The Loss of Being Known

    Grief doesn't just take the person you love—it can also take the one person who knew you most deeply. In this deeply personal episode, Jay reflects on one of the hidden losses of widowhood: losing the person who witnessed your heart, spoke life into your calling, and reminded you of who you were becoming. After sharing updates from a season filled with transition—including preparing to step away from pastoring, writing new books, and welcoming a new grandson—Jay explores how grief quietly attacks identity, purpose, and belonging. If you've ever wondered... • Who am I now? • Does my life still matter? • Who really knows me anymore? ...this conversation is for you. Discover why grief often disguises itself as doubt, why remembering how your loved one saw you can become a healing practice, and why God's voice remains the truest foundation for your identity. Scripture Reflection: While this episode centers on personal reflection, its heartbeat reminds us that we are fully known by God, even when we deeply miss being known by someone we loved. As always, Jay reminds us: God is good. He is always good. And He always answers out of His goodness. Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland

  6. Jun 30

    Episode 63: The Loneliness Nobody Talks About

    Loneliness is one of the deepest secondary losses of grief—but it's often misunderstood. When most people hear the word loneliness, they think the answer is more people, more activity, or simply staying busy. But what if that's not the loneliness you're experiencing? In this episode, Jay shares the kind of loneliness that comes after losing a spouse—the loneliness of losing the person who knew your story, finished your sentences, remembered your history, and witnessed your life. Drawing from his own journey six and a half years after Christine's passing, Jay explores how loneliness isn't a lack of faith, why God never shames us for feeling lonely, and how His presence becomes our greatest comfort in places where no one else can follow. If you've ever felt lonely in the middle of a crowd, this conversation is for you. In this episode: • Why loneliness is different from simply being alone • The hidden loneliness of losing your "primary witness" • Why busyness isn't a cure for grief • How isolation quietly shapes our identity • Learning to surrender loneliness instead of fighting it • Finding God's presence in the places that hurt most "God is not afraid of our lonely places. He meets us there… reminding us that we are still known, still loved, and never forgotten." Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland

  7. Jun 9

    Episode 62: Unplanned Pages

    Six years ago, when Christine passed away, I never imagined I would write a grief devotional. I wasn't looking to become a grief coach, start a grief podcast, or build a ministry around loss. I was simply trying to survive. In this episode, I share the unexpected story behind NEXT: Lamentations and Devotions and why it exists. What began as private journal entries, prayers, questions, and laments slowly became something much bigger than I ever intended. Along the way, I discovered that grief isn't a problem to solve—it's a relationship to learn. A relationship with loss, memory, change, and ultimately, with God Himself. I'll also share my original song, My Grief Song, and talk about why permission—not perfection—has become one of the most important themes of my grief journey. If you've ever wondered whether you're grieving "the right way," this episode is for you. In this episode: • Why I never intended to write a grief devotional • How journaling became a lifeline after loss • The importance of lament and honest conversations with God • Why grieving people need permission more than answers • The meaning behind the Selah and Grief Examen sections of the devotional • How God's goodness remains present in the middle of sorrow "I didn't write this because I had figured grief out. I wrote it because I was grieving." Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Podcast Music by Paul Grimsland Grief Song written by Jay Cookingham used with (mine) his permission. Buy NEXT: Lamentations and Devotions her: https://a.co/d/0g8K8kVT

  8. May 14

    Episode 61: Walking Through Grief with Adult Children

    One of the quieter challenges of grief is learning how to walk through it as a family — especially when everyone is grieving the same loss differently. In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham shares honestly about helping his seven adult children grieve the loss of their mother while continuing to navigate his own grief as a widower. How do you support your children without pushing them? How do you make room for different grief styles, timelines, and emotions? And what does it look like to stay present for one another when no one really knows what to say? Jay reflects on: • Why “gentle modeling” often helps more than advice • The sacred value of stories, memories, and family history • Learning to listen without trying to fix grief • Giving both yourself and your children grace Through Scripture, personal reflection, and practical wisdom, this episode reminds us that grief is not something families “solve” together — it’s something we learn to carry together with compassion, patience, and God’s help. “Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is stop trying to hurry each other through grief and simply stay present with one another inside it.” If you are grieving alongside your children — whether they are young or grown — this conversation will encourage you to lead with presence instead of pressure. Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you! Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t Music by Paul Grimsland

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Welcome to The NEXT Podcast with Jay Cookingham—a heartfelt journey through grief, loss, and healing. After the devastating loss of his wife, Christine, Jay shares raw, honest reflections on navigating life without her. Each episode explores how grief can become a teacher of resilience, inviting lament and revealing moments of grace in the deepest sorrow. With vulnerability and compassion, Jay offers encouragement to anyone walking the path of loss, reminding you that you are never alone on the journey toward healing.

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