Project Confidence

Kathie Gwilliam
  • 5.0 (7)
  • Self-Improvement
  • Weekly

Struggling with comparison, self-doubt, or feeling like you should be further along in life? Project Confidence is a weekly podcast for adults who want to break free from the comparison trap and become confidently content. In short 10-15 minute episodes, we explore how comparison impacts self-worth, relationships, and joy, and how to move beyond it using the SOAR method. Learn to replace comparison with appreciation, inspiration, and self-recognition. New Episodes drop every Thursday.

  1. Oct 22

    #73 - When In-Laws Clash: How Comparison Creates Family Tension

    Why are in-law relationships so often complicated, and how much of that tension comes from comparing one family's way of doing things to another's? In this episode of Project Confidence, I'm exploring how comparison, unspoken expectations, and the need to be understood can quietly drive a wedge between in-laws. It starts with a conversation I overheard about a mom whose mother-in-law invited her husband and children on a fall break trip, but not her. What struck me most wasn't just the exclusion. It was that she seemed to have accepted it as normal. From differences in traditions, parenting, and communication styles to teasing that leaves someone feeling judged or unwelcome, we'll explore how seemingly small moments can create lasting distance in our family relationships. I'll share a story about a daughter-in-law whose love of makeup became a source of family tension, why good intentions don't always prevent hurt, and how we can stop turning differences into judgments about someone's character. Most importantly, we'll talk about how to build healthier in-law relationships through curiosity, flexibility, appreciation, and respect, even when we don't share the same values or preferences. Because the goal isn't for everyone to become the same. It's to create relationships where people can be different and still feel deeply loved. If you've ever felt misunderstood by your in-laws, struggled to connect with your child's spouse, or wished your extended family relationships were a little less complicated, this episode is for you.

  2. Oct 8

    #72 - Dance First, Feel Confident Later: How to Stop Comparing Yourself and Build Confidence by Taking Action

    Do you ever feel like everyone else is more fun, more outgoing, or more confident than you? You're not alone, and this episode will help you stop comparing yourself and start building real self-confidence. At a youth conference dance, I stood on the sidelines while my friend Jill danced up a storm and our friend Brad took over a Michael Jackson song in a red leather jacket and black hat. My brain turned their fun into evidence against me. Then I tried something different. In this episode of Project Confidence, you'll learn: Why waiting to feel confident keeps you stuck on the sidelinesHow to turn comparison into inspirationHow to use the SOAR method to catch negative self-talk and replace it with actionWhy confidence often comes after you start, not beforeIf you want to overcome insecurity, stop feeling "less than," and feel more confident in social situations, at work, or in everyday life, this one is for you. This week's challenge: Where are you standing on the sidelines, waiting to feel confident enough to jump in? Take one tiny step onto your own dance floor.

  3. Sep 24

    #71 - Borrowed Belief

    What if one sentence could change the direction of someone’s life? When I was in seventh grade, my teacher, Mr. Cracroft, told me something I didn’t yet believe about myself: I was a good writer. Those few words came at a pivotal moment, and I had no idea they would stay with me for decades. Years later, when I was afraid to submit my first children’s book, I remembered his belief in me, and borrowed it until I was ready to believe in myself. In this episode, we’re talking about borrowed belief: how someone else’s encouragement can become the confidence we need to take our next step. And how we can become that person for someone else. Who believed in you before you believed in yourself? And who might need your belief today? Because you never know whose future is waiting on your words.

  4. Sep 3

    #70 - Maybe the Kids Know Something We Don't

    Some of the best advice about confidence, kindness, hard work, and happiness came from a group of teenagers. I recently attended a celebration honoring graduating seniors of the Onve Voice Children's Choir. As they shared the lessons they had learned and their advice for the younger kids, I found myself taking notes. They were reminders we all could use. Don't get so focused on the solo that you miss the song. Believe you have potential. Tell someone they're amazing. And so many more beautiful truths that left me feeling inspired. Tune in to this episode, filled with wisdom from the rising generation. You may be surprised by how much you needed to hear it, too.

  5. Aug 20

    #69 - Teaching Kids to Catch Comparison Before It Takes Over

    Back-to-school season brings excitement, nerves—and plenty of comparison. In this episode, Kathie shares a simple way parents, teachers, and caring adults can help kids recognize comparison and work through it using the SOAR Method: State it, Observe it, Acknowledge it, and Replace it. You'll learn how to respond when kids say things like, “I wish I were more like her,” and help them move out of the better/worse mindset and toward confidence, appreciation, inspiration, and recognition. Because confidence isn't believing you're better than everyone else. It's knowing your worth was never meant to be measured against theirs. Download the free SOAR resources at kathiegwilliam.com.

  6. Jul 2

    #68 Fix the Floor, Not the Fall

    Have you ever felt like your confidence is steady one day... and completely shaken the next? In this episode of Project Confidence, I'm sharing an unexpected lesson from my own kitchen. For years, our dishwasher leg was balancing on a broken floor, and with the slightest bump would fall down, leaving the dishwasher uneven and the metal straining. It was a real pain to get back in place. That's exactly what comparison does to our confidence. We often try to manage the symptoms of comparison with positive affirmations, working harder, or avoiding situations that make us feel "less than." But if our sense of worth is resting on an unstable foundation, it only takes one comment, one social media post, or one success story from someone else to knock us off balance again. In this episode, you'll learn: Why comparison creates fragile confidenceThe hidden cost of continually managing self-doubt instead of addressing its sourceHow to identify the "uneven floor" in your own lifeHow to use the SOAR Method to replace comparison with lasting confidence through Appreciation, Inspiration, and RecognitionIf you're tired of feeling like your confidence keeps slipping, this episode will help you stop patching the symptoms and start building a steadier foundation. Because real confidence isn't about never getting bumped—it's about standing on something that doesn't move.

  7. Jun 11

    #67 - Why Should I Care What Jerks Think About Me?

    In high school, I sat backstage during play rehearsal listening to some of the starring boys loudly criticize the girls performing on stage. Curious—and maybe a little bold—I joked, “Wow… I wonder what you’d be saying about me if I was up there.” Without hesitation, one of them answered: “What a big butt you have.” That moment gave me all the feels you would think a teen would feel. But it also helped me realize how easily we hand our confidence over to other people, especially when they are rude. In this episode, I unpack one of the most freeing questions I’ve ever asked myself: Why do I care what people like that think about me? We talk about: Why cruel opinions often reveal more about the speaker than the person being judgedHow comparison and insecurity lead people to tear others downThe lesson my mom taught me about understanding people without excusing harmful behaviorThe difference between someone having access to speak and having authority over your self-worthHow to stop giving influence to voices that don’t deserve itFrom high school rehearsals to social media comments to everyday comparisons, this episode is about learning to filter opinions instead of absorbing them. Because not everyone who speaks about you deserves space in your self-concept.

  8. May 28

    #66 - I'm Not Bad At This... I'm Just New At This

    In this episode of Project Confidence, Kathie explores the powerful difference between being “bad” at something and simply being “new” at it. So often, we label ourselves too quickly when learning a new skill, and those labels shape whether we keep going or give up. Using a story about her daughter learning to rollerblade, Kathie shares how children naturally approach growth differently from adults. After falling over and over again, her daughter proudly announced, “I only fell like five times—I’m really good at this!” Instead of seeing mistakes as proof of failure, she saw them as part of learning. Kathie dives into how the language we use affects the brain, explaining why thoughts like “I’m bad at this” can trigger avoidance and shutdown, while “I’m new at this” keeps us open to curiosity, practice, and growth. She also shares how her daughter later broke her wrist rollerblading—but still got back out there with a cast and a new pair of wrist guards, adjusting instead of quitting. This episode is a reminder that confidence isn’t built by instantly succeeding. It’s built through repetition, small wins, resilience, and recognizing progress along the way. If you’ve been discouraged while learning something new, this conversation will help you shift your mindset, celebrate growth, and keep going.

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About

Struggling with comparison, self-doubt, or feeling like you should be further along in life? Project Confidence is a weekly podcast for adults who want to break free from the comparison trap and become confidently content. In short 10-15 minute episodes, we explore how comparison impacts self-worth, relationships, and joy, and how to move beyond it using the SOAR method. Learn to replace comparison with appreciation, inspiration, and self-recognition. New Episodes drop every Thursday.

Information

  • Creator
    Kathie Gwilliam
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    75
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Kathie Gwilliam
  • Show Website
    Project Confidence

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