Demystifying Child's Play | Play Schemas

Ruth Vercoe

Kia ora, Hello! I’m Ruth Vercoe, a teacher-turned-mum, here on a mission to demystify Child’s Play through understanding play schemas.If you’ve ever found yourself asking, 'Why is my child doing that?'—whether it’s throwing their soft toys, hiding stones around the house, or lining up their crayons —then you’re in the right place, and certainly not alone. Here, we’ll explore the magic of play through the lens of play schemas—those hidden repeated patterns in your child’s behaviour that hold the key to unlocking more meaningful play and connection. Join me each week as we dive into playful insights that will help you bring more joy, connection and understanding into your parenting journey. Get in contact atEmail Ruth@Playschemas.comFacebook and Instagram @Play_Schemas

  1. 2D AGO

    064 Play Schema Series - Positioning 101

    Positioning Play Schema… Why Toddlers Line Things Up Have you ever noticed your child lining up toys, stacking blocks just so, or arranging snacks before eating them? That’s the Positioning Play Schema in action. In this episode, we explore what positioning play really is, why toddlers and young children are drawn to order, patterns, and alignment, and how this type of play supports early maths skills, logical thinking, spatial awareness, focus, and emotional regulation. You’ll learn: What the positioning play schema looks like in everyday toddler behaviourWhy lining up, sorting, and stacking is powerful brain-building workHow positioning play supports learning, confidence, and a sense of controlWhy this behaviour is not “obsessive”, it’s developmentally essentialIf you’re parenting a toddler and wondering why play looks so repetitive or precise, this episode will help you reframe what you’re seeing and support your child’s learning through play. Perfect for parents of children aged 1–5 who want to better understand play schemas, toddler behaviour, and child development. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    6 min
  2. FEB 18

    063 Play Schema Series - Transportation 101

    Transportation Play Schema Explained... Why Toddlers Carry Everything Everywhere Have you ever wondered why your toddler insists on carrying toys from room to room, filling backpacks with random objects, or pushing a pram loaded with teddies across the house on repeat? In this episode, we’re diving into the Transportation Play Schema, one of the most common (and often misunderstood) play schemas in early childhood. Transportation play is all about moving objects from one place to another. While it can look messy, chaotic, or even frustrating at times, this behaviour is actually deeply purposeful. It’s how young children make sense of journeys, distance, order, and belonging in their world. You’ll learn: What the transportation schema is and how it shows up in toddler and preschool playWhy children feel such a strong urge to carry, push, collect, and relocate objectsHow transportation play supports brain development, including sequencing, categorisation, and spatial awarenessThe emotional side of transportation play, comfort, control, confidence, and independenceHow to reframe “messy” behaviour into meaningful learningSimple ways to support transportation play at home (without fighting it)We also explore how recognising play schemas can dramatically reduce parental frustration. When you understand the why behind your child’s behaviour, it becomes much easier to lean into their play rather than push against it. Whether this is your first introduction to play schemas or part of your ongoing journey with The Play Schemas Collective, this episode will help you see your child’s play, and learning, in a whole new way. If you’re ready to stop battling the mess and start understanding the magic behind it, this episode is for you. Follow along for more toddler behaviour insights, play schema explanations, and practical parenting support. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    8 min
  3. FEB 11

    062 Play Schema Series - Age Specific Trajectory Behaviour

    Trajectory Play Schema by Age: What Movement Play Looks Like from Birth to 5+ Ever wondered why your baby keeps dropping things, your toddler throws everything in sight, or your preschooler builds elaborate ramps and obstacle courses? In this episode, we explore age-specific trajectory play behaviours from birth through to five years and beyond, giving you a clear roadmap for how movement play naturally evolves as your child grows. The Trajectory Play Schema is all about a child’s deep, instinctive urge to explore how objects, and their own bodies, move through space. This isn’t random behaviour or “naughty” play. It’s your child building early foundations for physics, problem-solving, emotional regulation, and confidence through movement. We’ll walk through four key developmental stages, covering: What trajectory play typically looks like at each ageWhy behaviours like throwing, splashing, climbing, and jumping are so importantHow you can confidently support trajectory play at home (without shutting it down)What’s developmentally normal, so you can reframe frustration into understandingFrom babies tracking movement and dropping spoons, to toddlers testing gravity, to preschoolers designing ramps, chain reactions, and movement-based games, this episode helps you see the learning beneath the behaviour. If you’re parenting a child aged 0–5 years (or beyond), this episode will help you: Understand your child’s movement urgesSupport big body play safelyReduce power struggles around throwing and climbingFeel more confident responding to messy, energetic playSend a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    11 min
  4. FEB 4

    061 Play Schema Series - Transformation 101

    Why is my toddler so messy? If your child loves mixing, squishing, pouring, smearing, and turning everyday materials into something new, you’re likely seeing the Transformation Play Schema in action. In this episode, we explore the Transformation Play Schema, one of the most powerful and misunderstood play schemas in early childhood. Play schemas are deep, instinctive urges that drive children’s play and support brain development, learning, and emotional regulation. The Transformation Schema is all about change: how materials change in texture, colour, shape, size, and consistency. From mud kitchens and potion-making to paint-covered arms and melting ice, this kind of messy play isn’t misbehaviour, it’s high-value learning. In this episode, you’ll learn: What the Transformation Play Schema isWhy messy play is essential for toddler and preschooler developmentHow children learn cause and effect through transformation playWhat transformation looks like in everyday playWhy repetition matters for brain developmentHow understanding play schemas can reduce power struggles and big emotionsYou’ll also hear why transformation play starts early, why it can feel repetitive, and how supporting this schema, instead of fighting it, can make parenting calmer and more connected. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    9 min
  5. JAN 28

    060 Play Schema Series - Disconnection 101

    What is the Disconnection Play Schema? A 101 Overview Have you ever watched your toddler peel every sticker off a book, pull tissues out one by one, or dismantle a block tower you just built… and wondered why they do it? In this episode, we’re diving into the Disconnection Play Schema, one of the most misunderstood (and often messy!) forms of toddler play. Disconnection play is all about a child’s deep, instinctive urge to understand how things come apart. It’s the opening, pulling, removing, unzipping, unscrewing, tearing, and undoing that helps children explore how the world works. And while it can look destructive on the surface, it’s actually powerful learning in action. In this 101 overview, you’ll learn: What the Disconnection Play Schema really isWhy toddlers are driven to pull things apart (again and again)How disconnection play supports problem-solving, fine motor skills, persistence, and early STEM thinkingWhy this behaviour is healthy, necessary, and developmentally appropriateSimple ways to support disconnection play safely at home (without losing your sanity)If you’re in the thick of toddler life and feeling overwhelmed by the constant dismantling, this episode is for you. Understanding the why behind the behaviour can completely change how it feels, and how you respond. Because your child isn’t undoing your work to frustrate you. They’re doing their work,  building the foundations for learning, curiosity, and critical thinking. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    6 min
  6. JAN 21

    059 Play Schema Series - Connection 101

    What is the connection play schema… and why does your child seem driven to tie, tape, build, and join everything together? In this episode, we’re starting with a foundational question: what exactly is the connection schema, and why does it matter so much in early childhood development? Schemas are deep, instinctive urges that drive children’s play. They aren’t random behaviors—they’re the brain’s way of building foundations for lifelong learning. And the connection schema is all about how things join together… and sometimes how they come apart. From tying objects together and building endless towers, to taping toys into long lines or wanting to sit close and hold hands, connection play is your child’s natural way of exploring structure, stability, and the forces that hold things in place. In this episode, you’ll learn: What the connection schema really is (and what it isn’t)Why connection play is normal, healthy, and developmentally necessaryHow children use connecting and disconnecting to explore physics, engineering, and problem-solvingThe powerful link between connection play and fine motor developmentHow this schema supports early STEM thinking, confidence, and persistenceReal-life examples of what connection play looks like at home (yes, including all the tape and string!) If you’re feeling overwhelmed by repetitive play, messy setups, or emotional meltdowns when creations fall apart, this episode offers reassurance and clarity. Repetition isn’t a problem, it’s how the brain wires itself. And when you understand schema-driven behavior, it becomes so much easier to support your child with empathy and intention. If your child is constantly connecting, tying, taping, building, or taking things apart, they’re learning exactly what they need to learn, and your support makes a remarkable difference. Let’s dive deeper into the connection schema together. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    7 min
  7. JAN 7

    058 Tired of “New Year, New Me”? Try a Family Preset Instead

    Join the free 2026 Family Preset: https://playschemas.com/preset Feeling tired already, and the year’s only just begun? If “new year, new me” feels more exhausting than motivating, this episode offers a different way forward. In this episode, Ruth introduces the 2026 Family Preset, a free, gentle, 5-day guided experience designed especially for parents of young children. No pressure. No hustle. Just clarity, connection, and small shifts that make family life feel lighter. Instead of fixing everything, this is about deciding what really matters, and setting your family up for a calmer, more connected year. What You’ll Learn Why clarity (not discipline) is often what’s missing when parenting feels hardHow small, intentional shifts can change the tone of your whole familyWhy rest, connection, and repair matter more than perfectionHow understanding your child’s play can reduce frustration and conflictWhat it really means to “preset” your family for the year ahead The 5 Days of the Family Preset Day 1: Starting with you, rest that actually restoresDay 2: Parenting as a team (or with your support system)Day 3: Understanding your child through their play and schemasDay 4: Building connection into everyday routinesDay 5: Protecting connection on the hard days through repairIncludes short daily videos, one small task a day, two weeks to complete it, and the chance to win over $500 in prizes. Resources Join the free 2026 Family Preset: https://playschemas.com/presetInstagram DM option: https://instagram.com/playschemasIf this episode supported you, please subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and leave a review, it helps more parents find calm and clarity through play 💛 #DemystifyingChildsPlay #FamilyPreset #GentleParenting #PlayIsLearning #ConnectionOverConflict #ParentingSupport Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    6 min
  8. 12/31/2025

    057 How Play Can Transform Your Parenting in 2026

    Join the 2026 Family Preset waitlist! Preset week is 12th-16th January 2026. The new year can feel full of pressure, new routines, new goals, and the quiet expectation that everything should suddenly feel more “together.” But if you’re parenting a toddler or preschooler and your day still involves toast on the floor and snack requests five minutes after breakfast, you’re not doing it wrong. In this episode of Demystifying Child’s Play, we’re welcoming 2026 with a gentler, more grounded perspective on parenting, one that replaces overwhelm with understanding and helps you reconnect with what really matters: your child’s play. You’ll be introduced (or reintroduced) to play schemas, the repetitive patterns of play that are hardwired into how young children learn and develop. We’ll explore why behaviours like throwing, lining up, spinning, enclosing, and pulling things apart aren’t “phases to fix,” but meaningful learning in action. When you understand what’s driving your child’s play, parenting starts to feel more intentional, less frustrating, and surprisingly more joyful. Through real-life examples and relatable moments from family life, this episode breaks down how play schemas support cognitive development, emotional regulation, physical coordination, and confidence, all without worksheets or structured activities. You’ll also hear practical ways to spot schemas in your own child’s play, how to support them using simple, everyday materials, and why protecting time for child-led play is one of the most powerful investments you can make this year. We’ll also touch on something parents don’t hear often enough: play isn’t just good for children, it’s good for us too. Joining your child in play, even briefly, builds connection, supports emotional wellbeing, and reminds us that joy and learning don’t need to be separate. If you’re stepping into the new year wanting less pressure, more confidence, and a deeper connection with your child, this episode is for you. Subscribe to the podcast, share this episode with another parent who needs this reminder, and come continue the conversation with me over on Instagram @play_schemas. For free resources and further support, visit playschemas.com. Because you don’t need to add more this year, you just need to understand what’s already there. And today is a great day to play. Send a text Support the show If this episode resonated with you, subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review! I would love to hear your playtime stories—whether you’re celebrating a win or trying to crack the mystery behind a new behaviour, I’m here for it. Reach out on social media or drop me a message. Facebook and Instagram @play_schemas Ruth@PlaySchemas.com www.playschemas.com and if you are keen for a freebie... head to playschemas.com/free to see what there is for you!

    8 min

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About

Kia ora, Hello! I’m Ruth Vercoe, a teacher-turned-mum, here on a mission to demystify Child’s Play through understanding play schemas.If you’ve ever found yourself asking, 'Why is my child doing that?'—whether it’s throwing their soft toys, hiding stones around the house, or lining up their crayons —then you’re in the right place, and certainly not alone. Here, we’ll explore the magic of play through the lens of play schemas—those hidden repeated patterns in your child’s behaviour that hold the key to unlocking more meaningful play and connection. Join me each week as we dive into playful insights that will help you bring more joy, connection and understanding into your parenting journey. Get in contact atEmail Ruth@Playschemas.comFacebook and Instagram @Play_Schemas