Hurt Meets Healer Podcast

Kim Capps
  • 5.0 (3)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Biweekly

Hurt people, hurt people. Are you ready to work through the pain of your past? Healing is possible! Join us on our healing journey, a journey to freedom, where you'll get straight truth from genuine people. We use our story and experience to help others walk through the trauma of intimate betrayal. This is raw and real talk from average people who are walking the path of healing. Kim is a Certified Professional Mentor™ through BraveHearts University, and a Certified Christian Life Coach through the Board of Christian Life Coaching.

  1. 16h ago

    I Want A Partner, Not A Project

    Your marriage can survive a lot, but betrayal has a unique way of turning love into labor. When infidelity hits, trust is not the only thing that breaks. Safety breaks. Reality breaks. And for many betrayed spouses, the relationship quietly becomes a full-time project: checking phones, tracking moods, chasing transparency, and doing the emotional work of recovery for two people. Kim and John get painfully honest about the difference between a partner and a project. We talk through why “fixing” is such a strong pull after sexual betrayal trauma, and why it still fails to create real change. Kim lays out what she needs to experience a true partner: emotional accountability, sexual faithfulness by choice, consistent effort, and respect for the marriage as a team. We also unpack the costs of overfunctioning, from hypervigilance and delayed healing to losing your identity, and we name the pressure points that keep people stuck, including shame, fear, and religious or cultural expectations. You’ll leave with practical clarity, including three questions to test whether change is real, guidance on healthy boundaries that protect your healing, and a grounded reminder that your agency matters. If you’re trying to rebuild after infidelity, navigating betrayal trauma triggers, or wondering when it’s time to stop babysitting what someone else broke, this conversation is for you. Subscribe, share with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find hope and solid help. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    50 min

  2. Jun 8

    Safety First, part 2

    Safety doesn’t come back because time passes, it comes back when your body gets real evidence that danger is over. We sit down for a raw, practical talk about betrayal trauma and why infidelity and sexual betrayal can leave the betrayed spouse stuck in hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and a nervous system that refuses to settle even when the unfaithful partner says “I’m trying.” We dig into what actually helps restore the conditions for safety: genuine care, compassion, understanding, and empathy. Not performative apologies, not pressure to “forgive and forget,” and definitely not defensiveness. We also unpack attunement, the skill of staying present with your partner’s pain without making it about your own discomfort, and we name the subtle behaviors that read as unsafe in real life, like minimizing, blame shifting, eye rolling, secretive phone patterns, and shutting down hard conversations. We connect the dots between the amygdala (your brain’s alarm system), panic, and the way unprocessed trauma keeps showing up until it’s addressed. Then we move into action: boundaries, self-care, trauma-informed counseling or coaching, and betrayal trauma support groups that validate instead of shame. We also say this clearly: your healing does not require your partner’s participation, even though relationship repair does require empathy and accountability. If this resonates, share it with someone who needs language for what they’re living, then subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what safety looks like for you today. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    48 min

  3. May 25

    Safety First, part 1

    Safety isn’t a buzzword for me right now, it’s the line between surviving and actually healing. I’m recording solo as John steps back, and I’m talking plainly about what it feels like to live in the aftermath of infidelity, porn addiction, and long-term secret sexual behaviors. When the person you trusted most becomes a threat, your nervous system does exactly what it was designed to do: it sounds the alarm. If you’ve been told to “just let it go,” I explain why that doesn’t work and what trauma-informed recovery looks like instead. I walk through the non-negotiables that create emotional safety after sexual betrayal: real accountability, consistent transparency, empathy that shows up in actions, and time. I also share what I’m doing on my side of the street to reclaim agency, including finding betrayal trauma support that understands the symptoms, setting boundaries that protect my peace, and building internal safety with grounding, journaling, exercise, and solid support networks. I even use a simple ladder metaphor for unfaithful partners: you don’t learn repair by studying it, you learn by practicing it. If you feel abandoned, disregarded, or like your body won’t calm down, you’re not alone and you’re not too sensitive. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs safety language, and leave a review so more betrayed spouses can find real help. What’s one small step you can take toward safety today? Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    51 min

  4. May 11

    Break The Cycle

    The fastest way to stay stuck after infidelity is to keep having the same fight with new words. We name the brutal loop that so many couples live in after sexual betrayal: poor communication, misunderstandings, mistrust, and then another round of pain that feels impossible to calm down. We walk through a six-step recovery roadmap drawn from Gottman research, emotionally focused therapy, and betrayal recovery frameworks: commit to the process, create immediate safety, process the betrayal, rebuild communication skills, attune emotionally to rebuild trust, and reconnect into a new kind of relationship. Along the way, we share what we got wrong, why “self-guided talks” can retraumatize, and what “radical honesty” looks like in real life through transparency, accountability, and consistent behavior over time. We also talk about the importance of the right kind of help: trauma-informed counseling for betrayal trauma, CSAT-level support for sexual addiction recovery, and safe groups that keep you from walking this road alone. If you’re dealing with hypervigilance, stonewalling, defensiveness, or that constant feeling that nothing is safe, this conversation offers language, structure, and hope without pretending it’s quick or easy. If this helps, subscribe, share it with someone who needs a steady next step, and leave a review so more hurting couples can find support. What part of the cycle are you trying to break first? Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    1h 11m

  5. Apr 27

    What The What? A Hard Talk About Trust

    “If you couldn’t talk, would I fall in love with your actions?” That one question exposes what trust is made of and that which betrayal destroys. We sit down for a raw, unfiltered conversation about what happens when words sound spiritual and sincere, but behavior still hides, deflects, or withdraws. If you’re walking through sexual addiction, infidelity, deception, or the aftershocks of a double life, you’ll recognize the push-pull of wanting answers while also needing safety more than explanations. We dig into what actually fuels hiddenness and why it starts so early for so many people: shame, fear of being wrong, fear of being seen, and an identity built around not measuring up. We talk about how resentment forms when we assume instead of asking, how conflict spirals when one partner hears “attack” in a request for transparency, and why “tone” becomes a distraction from the real issue: a bruised heart that needs honesty, consistency, and ownership. We also explore what it means to love without “give to get,” and how identity and faith can reshape the choices that once felt automatic. You’ll hear why you don’t need every “why” to heal, but you do need enough truth to live in reality, including the role of a full therapeutic disclosure in rebuilding trust. If this resonates, subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more hurting couples can find support. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    1h 3m

  6. Apr 13

    Walking With An Emotional Limp

    Betrayal trauma doesn’t fade because someone says “sorry” or quotes forgiveness. When trust gets shattered by infidelity and sexual betrayal, the fallout can look like grief, anxiety, insomnia, PTSD symptoms, shame, and a faith crisis that makes you question everything you thought was true. We call it walking with an emotional limp because you may function on the outside while every step still hurts on the inside. We get honest about what actually blocks healing and what helps it begin. We use a broken toe story to make the point plain: wounds heal when they’re cared for, protected, and given time, and they do not heal while someone keeps re-injuring them. We also name the damage caused by gaslighting, DARVO, blame shifting, and “performance” recovery that looks good on paper but feels unsafe at home. If you’re trying to rebuild trust after betrayal, we talk about why transparency and consistent truth over time matter more than big promises. We also share what supports long-term infidelity recovery for the betrayed partner: healthy boundaries, detaching when needed, verifying instead of blindly trusting, and healing in community so you’re not carrying this alone. And we end with a grounded hope rooted in faith, including a comforting reframing of “fear not” as God staying close, not shouting commands from a distance. If this resonates, subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more hurting spouses can find real help. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    47 min

  7. Mar 30

    Why I Stayed

    The question “Why did you stay?” can feel like an accusation until you’ve lived inside betrayal trauma. We sit down as a married couple and tell the truth about what kept us here after infidelity, lies, and the long fallout of sexual addiction and broken trust. It isn’t one simple reason, and it isn’t a clean timeline. It’s hope, fear, faith, kids, history, and the complicated math of safety. Kim walks through the faulty beliefs that can quietly lock partners into unhealthy dynamics: thinking divorce automatically makes you a failure, believing you caused the betrayal, believing love means enduring anything, or believing grace means ignoring ongoing deception. We also talk about the outside noise that says “just leave,” and why that advice can miss the realities of shared family, shared finances, shared businesses, and deep grief. John answers his own side of “why did I stay,” naming image, fear, and avoidance, plus the struggle to communicate without shutting down. From practical boundaries like separation and ending circular arguments to faith-based healing practices like praying scripture at 3 a.m., we focus on one goal: staying well, not staying stuck. If you’re navigating infidelity recovery, betrayal trauma healing, or a Christian marriage crisis and you need language for what you’re carrying, press play. Subscribe, share this with someone who feels alone, and leave a review so more hurting couples can find real help. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    54 min

  8. Mar 16

    Is There Peace in Not Knowing? - Finding Real Peace After Betrayal

    Peace that depends on silence isn’t peace at all—it’s quicksand. We tackle the hard question: is there peace in not knowing after sexual betrayal? Kim and John open up about the shaky calm that comes from avoidance, the simmer beneath a detente, and the moment truth—however painful—becomes the only solid ground. We don’t romanticize disclosure; we show how it spikes distress, then unlocks consent, clarity, and a path to rebuild safety. We break down the difference between honesty and transparency. Honesty answers the question fully; transparency goes first, proactively naming slips, triggers, and financial or digital footprints so nothing lives in the dark. That rhythm creates safety, and only then can trust begin to grow. We talk about gaslighting and how it warps reality, why defensiveness protects shame but destroys intimacy, and how learning to sit with our own pain helps us sit with our partner’s pain without fixing, minimizing, or explaining it away. Anchored in faith and practical tools, we explore boundaries that end enabling: formal disclosure with a professional, trauma-informed counseling, accountability systems, and community support. Kim shares the turning point of saying, “I love you, but I’m no longer interested in the life you offer if it remains hidden,” and how that stance reclaimed agency without revenge. We also address when full truth never arrives and how survivors can still heal—rooted in a God who sees what was concealed and offers wisdom for each next step. If you’re navigating sexual betrayal, infidelity recovery, or the fallout of secrecy, this conversation offers language, structure, and hope. Expect straight talk on safety before trust, the cost and reward of truth, and the courage to live congruent with your values. Subscribe, share with someone who needs it, and leave a review with the one boundary or practice that brought you closer to real peace. Thank you for listening! For more information about us and the services we offer, visit www.hurtmeetshealer.com. Intro & Outro music written, performed, and produced by Kim Capps. This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal, medical, or professional advice. The views expressed by the Host or any Guest(s) are strictly their own and in no way constitute legal, medical, or professional advice. Copyright ©️ 2026, Hurt Meets Healer, LLC. All rights reserved.

    53 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
3 Ratings

About

Hurt people, hurt people. Are you ready to work through the pain of your past? Healing is possible! Join us on our healing journey, a journey to freedom, where you'll get straight truth from genuine people. We use our story and experience to help others walk through the trauma of intimate betrayal. This is raw and real talk from average people who are walking the path of healing. Kim is a Certified Professional Mentor™ through BraveHearts University, and a Certified Christian Life Coach through the Board of Christian Life Coaching.

Information

  • Creator
    Kim Capps
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    46
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Hurt Meets Healer Podcast
  • Show Website
    Hurt Meets Healer Podcast