Sit Around the Fire

Ashlea Dillard
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Mental Health
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to Sit Around the Fire — the space where stories ignite transformation. Hosted by a former first responder turned licensed professional counselor and certified hypnotherapist, this podcast blends real-life experiences, powerful teachings, and practical tools for mental and physical health. Each episode invites you to slow down, reflect, and find your spark again. Together, we explore mindfulness, stress management, trauma recovery, and PTSD healing — all through the lens of someone who’s lived it. You’ll hear raw conversations with first responders, veterans, and mental health experts as well as other incredible human beings with amazing stories and missions who share their wisdom on how to move from burnout to balance, from survival mode to thriving. If you’re ready to break free from old patterns and beliefs, reclaim your peace, and live your most abundant, limitless life, this is your community. ✨ What you’ll learn: How to manage stress and trauma while building emotional resilience.Practical mindfulness and mental well-being techniques that fit your lifestyle.Real stories of healing from first responders and military families.Tools to strengthen both mental and physical health for lasting change. Don’t suffer in silence. Join our community — subscribe, follow, and connect. 👉 Subscribe to Sit Around the Fire wherever you listen to podcasts. 👉 Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok for daily inspiration. 👉 Visit our site to join the email list and start doing the inner work today. It’s time to heal. It’s time to rise. It’s time to sit around the fire. 🔥Get Connected with Us!  www.sitaroundthefire.org 👉🏻 Interested in doing one to one work with Ashlea... www.ashleadillard.com 🫶🏼 Let's Be Friends  Facebook Instagram Ticktock YouTube

  1. 2d ago

    #057 The Perfectionist and the People Pleaser

    Once upon a time, there was a girl named Ashlea. She was good at everything, she was the one who kept everyone okay, and from the outside she looked like she had it all figured out. She was also exhausted all the time and had no idea who she actually was. In this solo episode, I'm telling that story — mine, and maybe yours too — and unpacking the two survival patterns that ran my life for a long time: perfectionism and people pleasing. We're not treating these like bad habits you need more discipline to break. We're looking at them the way they actually work: as nervous system strategies your body learned to keep you safe. We get into perfectionism as a flight response — the foot-on-the-gas, plan-for-everything, control-it-all way of trying to outrun threat — and why it leaves you frozen and exhausted at the same time. Then we get into people pleasing as the fawn response: the gazelle who pours tea for the lion to make the threat go away, and the quiet, devastating cost of that — the masks, the lost preferences, the disappearing self. And then we turn toward the way out. Because here's the thing you've heard me say before, and I'll keep saying it: you're not broken. You've been programmed. And programming can be rewritten. What we coverWhy your nervous system is a prediction machine — and how the "what-ifs" are a survival system doing its jobPerfectionism as flight: control as a strategy to make the world feel safeWhy perfectionism keeps you stuck, indecisive, and exhausted with your foot on the gasWhy a small mistake can feel like an identity-level emergencyPeople pleasing as fawn: befriending the threat instead of fighting or fleeing itThe real cost of people pleasing — the loss of self, the masks, not knowing what you even likeHow these patterns get wired early, before we have language or choiceWhy we keep recreating the exact situations and relationships that reinforce themThe turn: thanking the pattern, sending your nervous system the memo, and living from the future forwardCampfire reflection for this weekWhere in your life are you still running a strategy that you don't need anymore? Tiny experiment: pick one low-stakes place this week and let it be imperfect on purpose, or let yourself have the unpopular preference. Then notice that you survived it. That's a rep. Connect & go deeperNervous system work, hypnotherapy, and coaching: ashleadillard.comMore episodes and resources: sitaroundthefire.orgShare this episode with someone who's always been "the strong one."

    22 min

  2. Jun 16

    #056: Breaking the Silence: Trauma and Healing in First Responders — with Keven McNeill

    Most of us think the clock on trauma starts the first day on the job. Keven McNeill is here to tell you it started a long time before that. In this episode, Keven shares his journey through law enforcement, a defining 2016 incident, and the depression and PTSD that followed — and the long road back. What makes his story land isn't just the hard parts. It's the honesty about how trauma accumulates quietly, how it follows you home, and how the same hypervigilance that keeps you alive on shift can quietly take apart your life off the clock. As a former firefighter and paramedic, I've sat in a version of this. The culture, the pride, the unspoken rule that you handle it. Keven and I get into all of it — and where that culture has to change. We talk about what proactive mental health actually looks like (not the version you reach for after everything's already on fire), why leadership has to be part of the solution, and how the bravest thing a responder can do is find their voice and ask for help. In this conversation: Why trauma doesn't start with the uniform — and how childhood shapes who's drawn to this workKeven's 2016 incident and the aftermath that pulled him into a deep depressionThe toll 2020 took on first responders, and the weight of deadly-force decisionsHypervigilance — how it shows up at the dinner table, not just on duty, and why it's so hard to switch offWhere leadership fails responders, and what it looks like when leaders "act like humans"Rebuilding identity and purpose after the career, and the journey to acceptance and giving back Resources mentioned: EMDR Therapy — https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/EMDR Acute Stress Adaptive Protocol (ASAP) — https://www.firstrespondercenter.com/ Connect with Keven McNeil: LinkedIn — https://linkedin.com/in/kevinmcneil Keven's Books More from Sit Around the Fire: If this one hit home, you're not alone — and you don't have to carry it alone. For more conversations like this, the podcast, and the work I do with first responders and anyone ready to heal, head to sitaroundthefire.org and ashleadillard.com.

    59 min

  3. Jun 9

    #055 The Most Important Investment You'll Ever Make

    We pour money, time, and energy into everything outside of ourselves — our kids, our businesses, our homes, the people who depend on us — and then we wonder why we feel so depleted. In this episode, Ashlea makes the case that investing in yourself isn't the luxury you get to once everything else is handled. It's the foundation everything else is built on. Drawing on her background in emergency services and her work as a Licensed Professional Counselor and clinical hypnotherapist, Ashlea walks through three arenas of self-investment — therapy, coaching, and physical health — and reframes each through the lens of the nervous system and the brain. You'll learn why the guilt you feel when you choose yourself is just old programming defending itself, why you are the single asset that produces every other return in your life, and how to make one concrete investment in yourself this week. This one's a permission slip and a strategy, all at once. What We CoverWhy investing in yourself feels so hard — and why the resistance isn't a stop signHow your brain runs the "path of least resistance" and why familiar isn't the same as safeTherapy as the investment in understanding where you've been — working on the rudderCoaching as the investment in where you're going — living from the future forwardPhysical health as nervous system care, not vanity — tending the vesselThe compound interest of self-investment and why waiting is the most expensive choiceThe reframe that changes everything: you are the sourceEpisode Timestamps(Adjust to final recording.) 00:00 — Intro01:30 — When was the last time you invested in you?04:00 — Why this is so hard: the programming and the prediction machine08:00 — Therapy: the investment in understanding yourself (the rudder)13:00 — Coaching: the investment in where you're going18:00 — Physical health: the investment in the vessel23:00 — The investment frame: why this is the highest return27:00 — One step to take this week + how to work togetherKey TakeawayYou are the asset that produces every other return in your life. Investing in yourself doesn't take away from the people you love — it increases the value of the one source they're all depending on. Work With AshleaClinical psychotherapy and hypnotherapy (Colorado) and one-on-one coaching (available inside and outside Colorado). Start a conversation at ashleadillard.com. LinksWebsite & resources: sitaroundthefire.orgWork with Ashlea: ashleadillard.com

    20 min

  4. Jun 2

    #054 From Trauma to Triumph: Packy Dempsey Shares His Journey Through the Fire

    This episode hits hard. Packy Dempsey, a retired law enforcement officer, takes us deep into the moment that changed everything — and how he turned that crucible into a mission of healing, not just for himself, but for first responders and military alike. We don't skip past the hard parts. Packy walks us through the four seconds that nearly ended his life, the chaos on scene, and the aftermath that no academy prepares you for: the guilt, the shame, the silent onset of addiction, and the dangerous belief that strength means carrying it alone. Then he shows us the other side — the brotherhood, the faith, the daily practices, and the radical gratitude that brought him back to life. This is a conversation about what it really costs to do this work, and what it takes to heal from it. Get ready to feel, reflect, and find the courage to face your own battles. In this episode: The life-altering four seconds that nearly took Packy's life and changed his world foreverThe raw truth behind police trauma, accountability, and the mental toll of critical incidentsHow complacency, identity, and the "Superman complex" can be deadly in high-stakes rolesThe importance of vulnerability, trust, and brotherhood among first respondersPractical tools — daily habits, training, and faith — that help Packy stay prepared and resilientThe transformative power of gratitude and community in healing from traumaA first look at Packy's upcoming book, which pairs vulnerability with authentic proof of survival and victoryA powerful call for men and women to break the silence, lean into support, and never fall alone Timestamps: 00:00 — Introduction: One of the toughest stories we've heard00:27 — Who was Packy before the moment that changed everything?02:47 — From mundane to miraculous: the story behind the four seconds04:18 — The chaos of the incident: a detailed recount of the critical moments on scene07:25 — The struggle to control the situation and the near loss of life09:40 — The mental and physical toll during and after the shooting11:29 — Understanding the psychological impact of police trauma15:10 — The real cost of high-stakes decision-making and the aftermath16:43 — How the trauma affected Packy's mental health and his journey to recovery21:06 — The role of support, vulnerability, and brotherhood in healing25:05 — The long road to mental peace: guilt, shame, and healing27:00 — How faith and community sustained Packy through his darkest days28:34 — The subtle but dangerous onset of addiction and coping mechanisms30:37 — The miraculous gift of gratitude in survival and recovery31:08 — What to do when you suspect someone is silently suffering36:52 — Behind the scenes of Packy's upcoming book and how it's a tool for healing38:32 — Training your mind: the key to readiness in emergencies39:28 — Final words of wisdom: face tomorrow with courage, not fear Resources & Links: Packy Dempsey — Official Website: https://www.packydempsey.com/Crossroads of Trauma and Triumph (book coming soon — check back for release)Work with Ashlea: ashleadillard.com

    40 min
  5. #053 Be the Queen You Already Are

    May 28

    #053 Be the Queen You Already Are

    Most women are waiting for permission to fully step into their power — but what if confidence isn't something you build? What if it's already inside you, ready to be claimed? In this special release episode of Sit Around the Fire, licensed professional counselor and clinical hypnotherapist Ashlea Dillard delivers a fiery, unfiltered message for every woman who's been playing small, waiting for the right moment, or surviving behind armor she no longer needs to wear. Ashlea breaks down the neuroscience behind why women hold back — how the nervous system codes growth as danger — and why courage isn't a feeling you wait for. It's a decision. A practice. A rewiring. You'll discover the powerful concept of "living from the future forward": how mental rehearsal and visualization aren't positive thinking — they're a brain-building blueprint. And you'll be introduced to the queen mindset: deep self-possession, unwavering decision, and the ability to walk into any room radiating authority — not because you've healed everything, but because you've decided who you are. This episode is for the woman who's tired of shrinking. Who's ready to stop leading from fear and start leading from love, abundance, and her own unshakeable truth. Your power is already in you. All that's left is to claim it.

    12 min

  6. May 26

    #052 The Power of Mindfulness in Trauma Recovery: Adrianne Lind's Journey

    In this insightful conversation, Adrianne Lind shares her journey through trauma, healing, and the transformative power of mindfulness and yoga. Discover practical tools for managing PTSD, grief, and stress, and learn how to cultivate a resilient nervous system for a healthier, more balanced life. Topics Discussed: Trauma and PTSD recovery The role of yoga and mindfulness in healing Nervous system regulation and resilience Adrianne Lind Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Healing Conversations 01:24 The Message of Forgiveness 06:07 Understanding the Nervous System's Role 06:32 Yoga as a Healing Tool 11:39 Navigating Grief and Trauma 12:34 Mindfulness and Daily Life 17:15 Responding vs. Reacting 19:56 Incorporating Music and Meditation 22:05 Mindful Walking and Nature Connection 22:29 The Power of Breath and Posture 25:50 Yoga and Grief Management 29:30 Consistency in Mindfulness Practices 33:10 Breathwork Techniques for Everyday Life 35:54 Navigating Stress and Emotional Responses 38:31 The Connection Between Trauma and Physical Health 39:49 Closing Resources Yoga Nidra for PTSD - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6313445/ Mindful Resilience Certification - https://yogaproject.org/mindful-resilience/ Adrianne Lind's Website & Books - https://adriannelind.com/ https://mybook.to/AdrianneLind

    42 min

  7. May 19

    #051 The Real Reason Willpower Isn't Working

    Have you ever known exactly what you should do — and still found yourself repeating the same patterns anyway? That frustration isn't a character flaw. It's neuroscience. In this episode, Ashlea Dillard breaks down why the subconscious mind holds onto emotional patterns — even painful ones — and how modern hypnotherapy gives us a direct pathway to change them. Drawing on the foundational clinical work of Gil Boyne and the transpersonal frameworks of Matthew Brownstein, Ashlea explores how affect bridge techniques, neuroplasticity, and emotionally resonant imagery work together to create the kind of transformation that actually sticks. You'll walk away understanding: Why your subconscious is protecting you, not sabotaging you — and why that matters for healingHow neuroplasticity works and why repetition, emotion, and focused attention are the real drivers of lasting changeWhy intellectual insight alone often isn't enough — and what hypnotherapy does differentlyThe one reflection practice that can help you start identifying the stories keeping you stuck If you've ever felt like you're trying to change but something invisible keeps pulling you back — this episode is for you. 🔥 New episodes every week. Find all resources at sitaroundthefire.org and ashleadillard.com.

    21 min

  8. May 14

    #050 Why Constant Fixing Keeps You Trapped—Shift from Doing to Being ft. Mitch Webb

    Are you exhausted from trying to fix yourself? More supplements, better routines, stricter discipline—and still your body feels like it's working against you.   In this episode, I sit down with Mitch Webb to talk about something most healing conversations miss: the idea that your body isn't broken—it's actually doing exactly what it was designed to do. Your symptoms, your anxiety, your need to control everything? Those aren't signs of failure. They're signs of a nervous system that learned to protect you.   Mitch gets raw and real about his own journey with control—how diet rules, rituals, and the relentless pursuit of perfection kept him stuck in a cycle of dysregulation. We trace how that need for certainty is rooted in early wounds, and why the path forward isn't about doing more—it's about finally learning to be.   In this episode, we explore: • Why your survival responses are signs of resilience, not failure • How control becomes a safety mechanism—and what it costs you • The link between trauma, attachment, and the need for certainty • How to build a flexible nervous system by creating new experiences of safety • Why vulnerability isn't weakness—it's your greatest healing tool • Practical ways to shift from doing to being and finally feel at home in your skin   This one isn't just for first responders or trauma survivors. It's for anyone exhausted by the endless chase for perfection and quick fixes. If you're ready to stop fighting your body and start trusting it, this episode is your permission slip.   Connect with Mitch Webb at his website and social channels for personalized coaching and community. @KMitchWebb www.mitchwebb.com   New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you never miss one.   🎧 Listen & subscribe: sitaroundthefire.org | ashleadillard.com

    56 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

Welcome to Sit Around the Fire — the space where stories ignite transformation. Hosted by a former first responder turned licensed professional counselor and certified hypnotherapist, this podcast blends real-life experiences, powerful teachings, and practical tools for mental and physical health. Each episode invites you to slow down, reflect, and find your spark again. Together, we explore mindfulness, stress management, trauma recovery, and PTSD healing — all through the lens of someone who’s lived it. You’ll hear raw conversations with first responders, veterans, and mental health experts as well as other incredible human beings with amazing stories and missions who share their wisdom on how to move from burnout to balance, from survival mode to thriving. If you’re ready to break free from old patterns and beliefs, reclaim your peace, and live your most abundant, limitless life, this is your community. ✨ What you’ll learn: How to manage stress and trauma while building emotional resilience.Practical mindfulness and mental well-being techniques that fit your lifestyle.Real stories of healing from first responders and military families.Tools to strengthen both mental and physical health for lasting change. Don’t suffer in silence. Join our community — subscribe, follow, and connect. 👉 Subscribe to Sit Around the Fire wherever you listen to podcasts. 👉 Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok for daily inspiration. 👉 Visit our site to join the email list and start doing the inner work today. It’s time to heal. It’s time to rise. It’s time to sit around the fire. 🔥Get Connected with Us!  www.sitaroundthefire.org 👉🏻 Interested in doing one to one work with Ashlea... www.ashleadillard.com 🫶🏼 Let's Be Friends  Facebook Instagram Ticktock YouTube

Information

  • Creator
    Ashlea Dillard
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    59
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Ashlea Dillard
  • Show Website
    Sit Around the Fire