Escape the Paradox

Helena Hickman
  • 5.0 (1)
  • MENTAL HEALTH
  • UPDATED BIWEEKLY

Covering: Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma | PTSD | C-PTSD | Trauma Recovery | Emotional and Psychological Abuse Welcome to Escape the Paradox, where I expose the hidden reality of coercive control and domestic violence including psychological, emotional and physical abuse.  I’m Helena, a survivor of childhood abuse. I'm a mental health nursing student and advocate, here to support you in breaking free from the confusion, fear, and isolation that abuse creates.  Home should be the safest place, but for many, it becomes the most dangerous.  In each episode, I share my personal story and dive into my own experiences, as well as survivor experiences, trauma-informed insights, and expert research to help you understand the mechanisms of abuse and begin your healing journey. We’ll explore tactics such as gaslighting, and how abusers wield and seek power and control, not to diagnose, but because naming abuse is the first step in reclaiming your reality.  If you're ready to reconnect with your truth and rebuild your self-worth through clarity and understanding, you’re in the right place.  Follow Escape the Paradox on Threads, Instagram, and TikTok: @escapetheparadox. 

  1. 1D AGO

    Borderline Personality Disorder - Diagnosis, Women, and Trauma

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma I think you are worth the effort of healing. In this (long) episode, I examine the diagnostic criteria of Borderline Personality Disorder, focusing on how the diagnosis is disproportionately applied to women and deeply intertwined with histories of trauma. It explores how trauma responses are often pathologized, the gendered assumptions embedded in diagnostic practices, and the consequences of mislabeling and stigmatizing distress. References Structural Violence and the Effects of the Patriarchal Structure on the Diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BDP): A Critical Study Using Tools on BPD Symptoms and Social Violence https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/22/2/196   Borderline Personality Disorder and Childhood Trauma: Exploring the Affected Biological Systems and Mechanisms. https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-017-1383-2   Childhood Trauma and Axis I Disorders In Borderline Personality Disorder: A Correlational Study. https://mecp.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s43045-025-00511-3   DSM-5 Made Easy. Dsm-5-Tr-Made-Easy-Clinicians-Diagnosis New Professional Practice Guideline for Adults with Complex Trauma Histories https://www.ctipp.org/post/new-professional-practice-guideline-for-adults-with-complex-trauma-histories  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    48 min

  2. SEP 12 · BONUS

    Bonus! Poem by Helena Hickman - "Restoration"

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This bonus episode shares a poem I wrote on self-worth, confronting reality, and the work of restoring the mind from broken parts.  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    2 min

  3. SEP 12

    Challenge Negative Thoughts about your Worth | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma I think you are worth the effort of healing.  Worthlessness speaks in absolutes, but that doesn’t make it true. In this episode, I explore what happens when you stop taking the voice at face value and begin challenging the thoughts that try to define you.  This episode isn’t about strategies to overcome negative thoughts. It’s about acknowledging that these thoughts are unhealthy and hold back healing. Acceptance of this as a truth is the first step before any deeper work on changing them can begin.  References: The Bobo Doll Experiment Learn about DBT Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    24 min

  4. AUG 5

    Choosing a Therapist or Counsellor | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Finding the right therapist or counsellor can feel overwhelming, especially after experiencing abuse or trauma (or maybe while you're still experiencing it). In this episode, I share practical tips for choosing a professional who truly understands coercive control and can support your healing journey.  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    17 min

  5. JUN 22

    Smear Campaigns | What They Are, How to Spot Them, and How to Cope

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma When you leave an abusive relationship, especially one marked by coercive control, it’s not uncommon for the abuser to launch a smear campaign. This is a deliberate attempt to discredit you, isolate you, and control the narrative after you’ve left. In this episode, I break down what a smear campaign is, the red flags to watch for, and how you can protect your peace without exhausting yourself trying to prove your side.  Together, we will also explore why people often believe the abuser, and how to respond when they do. Whether you're navigating family fallout, social betrayal, or character assassination, this episode offers clarity, validation, and useful tips to help see this through. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    26 min

  6. MAY 18

    Feelings of Guilt After Leaving Abusive, Coercive Relationships

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma "I feel guilty"  If you’ve escaped coercive control or domestic violence, you’re probably no stranger to guilt. Feeling responsible for the pain your abuser claims to suffer after you leave is common. In this episode, I explore what guilt is, why it's not always trustworthy, and how guilt can also be used by abusers to manipulate.  Your safety and healing come first. You’re not alone, and that guilt doesn’t mean you made the wrong choice.  References The psychophysiology of guilt in healthy adults - This study explored the neurobiology behind the feeling of guilt, and I mention it in the episode. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    21 min

  7. MAY 2

    Using Children as Tools of Control in Relationships & Guest Kalesha Shares her Story

    Send us a text In this episode, I am joined by Kalesha, who bravely shares her personal story of surviving domestic abuse, and the current healing journey she is on. Together, we explore how children are often used as tools of manipulation and control in abusive relationships, which is a heartbreaking but critical aspect of coercive control that’s not discussed often enough.  The interview is an open and honest conversation, and we hope you enjoy listening in! Kalesha's Threads handle is: @the_corporate_cutie Visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about me, and the support that I offer. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    40 min

  8. APR 21

    Male Privilege and Entitlement within Coercive Control, Domestic Violence, Abuse, and Relationships

    Send us a text Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma In this episode, I’m talking about how male privilege is used as a tool for control in abusive relationships. This isn’t just about physical violence. I focus on the subtle, everyday ways power and entitlement show up and are reflected hugely in overrepresentation of males in society, as well as the difficulties in approaching these institutions that are supposed to protect women, as a result.  References Lundy Bancroft's book "Why Does He Do That?": Click Here Statistics shared regarding Canadian women in leadership roles: Click Here Study shared regarding male dominant attitudes within the police force: Click Here Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

    24 min
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About

Covering: Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma | PTSD | C-PTSD | Trauma Recovery | Emotional and Psychological Abuse Welcome to Escape the Paradox, where I expose the hidden reality of coercive control and domestic violence including psychological, emotional and physical abuse.  I’m Helena, a survivor of childhood abuse. I'm a mental health nursing student and advocate, here to support you in breaking free from the confusion, fear, and isolation that abuse creates.  Home should be the safest place, but for many, it becomes the most dangerous.  In each episode, I share my personal story and dive into my own experiences, as well as survivor experiences, trauma-informed insights, and expert research to help you understand the mechanisms of abuse and begin your healing journey. We’ll explore tactics such as gaslighting, and how abusers wield and seek power and control, not to diagnose, but because naming abuse is the first step in reclaiming your reality.  If you're ready to reconnect with your truth and rebuild your self-worth through clarity and understanding, you’re in the right place.  Follow Escape the Paradox on Threads, Instagram, and TikTok: @escapetheparadox. 

Information

  • Creator
    Helena Hickman
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    17
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Escape the Paradox
  • Show Website
    Escape the Paradox