The Psychology of Us

RJ Starr
  • 5.0 (5)
  • PHILOSOPHY
  • UPDATED BIWEEKLY

The Psychology of Us is an audio archive of psychologically grounded work examining how human beings construct meaning, sustain identity, and orient themselves within emotional and social life. Hosted by RJ Starr, a public intellectual and independent psychology educator, the series approaches psychology as a conceptual discipline rather than a set of techniques or interventions. Episodes engage core psychological structures such as identity, emotion, perception, belief, and moral orientation, treating them as organizing forces rather than symptoms or problems to be solved. The emphasis is on coherence, depth, and interpretive clarity, allowing ideas to be developed fully and situated within a broader psychological framework. This podcast is intended for listeners interested in psychological understanding as a way of seeing more clearly, not as guidance, diagnosis, or professional instruction. Episodes are published as stand-alone work and are meant to be encountered as finished reflections rather than serialized commentary.

  1. 16H AGO

    Why Some People Always Need the Last Word

    Why some people always need the last word is rarely about ego or control. It is more often about regulation. This episode explores conversational sealing as a psychological mechanism, examining why open-ended endings can feel destabilizing, how internal rumination keeps conversations alive, and why silence requires internal buffering. Drawing on developmental patterns, cognitive structure, and modern communication dynamics, the episode clarifies what changes when internal stability replaces the need for closure.

    12 min

  2. FEB 11

    When Explanation Stops Helping

    Psychology has become very good at explaining. So has this podcast. After more than a hundred episodes spent naming patterns, clarifying dynamics, and making sense of experience, a question has become harder to ignore: what happens when explanation stops producing movement? This episode marks a subtle shift. Not away from rigor, but toward a different kind of psychological work. Less focused on understanding experience, and more focused on how experience is actually held when it arises. If you’ve ever felt deeply informed and yet unchanged in the moments that matter, this conversation may meet you right at that edge. No steps. No answers. Just a reorientation.

    7 min

  3. FEB 4

    Emotional Threat Registers: Why Intensity Feels Like Understanding (and Often Isn’t)

    Why do intense experiences feel profound but leave us strangely unclear afterward? Why does outrage feel like insight, and certainty feel so comforting, even when understanding disappears? In this episode, psychology professor RJ Starr introduces the concept of Emotional Threat Registers—a framework for understanding how high emotional intensity narrows thinking, hijacks integration, and turns conviction into a form of stress relief. Drawing from psychology, neuroscience, and everyday life, Starr explores how modern media, outrage-driven platforms, violent entertainment, and daily micro-threats quietly overwhelm our capacity to think while feeling. This is not an argument for emotional detachment or indifference. It’s an invitation to understand how the nervous system responds to intensity, why some people flood while others stay clear, and how protecting surplus capacity restores real clarity. A grounded, humane exploration of why meaning requires space—and how to reclaim it without disengaging from the world.

    31 min

  4. JAN 28

    When Emotion Decides For You

    Most people believe their behavior reflects choice. In reality, much of what we do is driven by emotion moving faster than awareness. In this episode, RJ Starr examines the psychological difference between reactivity and response, showing how emotional urgency can bypass reflection and govern behavior without our consent. You’ll hear why reactivity feels necessary in the moment, why insight alone doesn’t change patterns, and how a small pause can restore agency, coherence, and authorship over action. This is not about calming down or controlling feelings. It’s about understanding how behavior is shaped when awareness arrives too late—and how freedom begins when it arrives in time.

    19 min

  5. JAN 21

    Why Feeling Behind in Life Feels So Convincing

    Feeling behind in life can feel strangely convincing, even when nothing is obviously wrong. You’re functioning, growing, and doing meaningful things, yet there’s a persistent sense that other people figured something out earlier, moved faster, or landed somewhere you missed. In this episode, Professor RJ Starr explores why the feeling of being behind is so powerful, why insight alone doesn’t make it go away, and how comparison quietly becomes a way the mind tries to orient itself in an uncertain world. This is not about motivation, productivity, or reassurance. It’s a psychological examination of borrowed timelines, distorted measures of progress, and what actually helps restore a sense of internal coherence. If you’ve ever thought “I should be further along by now” and couldn’t explain why, this episode is for you. #thepsychologyofus, #thepsychologyofbeinghuman, #profrjstarr, #psychology, #comparison, #existentialpsychology, #lifetimelines, #selfunderstanding, #emotionalclarity

    17 min

  6. JAN 16

    The Monks, the Walk for Peace, and the Psychology of Non-Reactivity - SPECIAL EPISODE

    In this special episode of The Psychology of Us, I reflect on a series of widely shared videos showing monks walking peacefully across the United States—and the powerful reactions they evoke everywhere they go. People cry.Children run toward them.Crowds slow down and gather.And the monks themselves remain steady, calm, and unchanged. What are we actually responding to when we witness this kind of presence? This episode explores the psychology of non-reactivity: how a regulated nervous system affects others, why people often release emotion in the presence of calm, and what it reveals about the emotional state of our culture right now. We look at containment versus emotional discharge, lived peace versus performed morality, and why quiet presence can feel so disarming—and so rare—in public life. This is not a religious episode.It’s a human one. Through a psychological lens, we examine why peace doesn’t need to argue, why loud certainty often masks internal instability, and what happens when someone refuses to escalate in a world trained for reaction. If you’ve felt overwhelmed by the intensity of modern life, unsettled by public outrage, or deeply moved by moments of genuine calm, this episode offers language for something many of us are feeling but struggling to articulate. Sometimes the most powerful thing a person can do is simply stay steady—and let the rest unfold.

    10 min

  7. JAN 14

    Being Reasonable Does Not Make You Safe

    Many emotionally mature people believe that staying calm, fair, and reasonable will protect them. When that belief collapses, the experience is often destabilizing rather than clarifying. This episode examines why being reasonable does not make you safe, unpacking emotional dominance, projection, power asymmetry, and the hidden burden placed on regulated people in irrational systems. It’s a psychological exploration of coherence, discernment, and how to remain grounded without confusing good behavior with guaranteed outcomes.

    19 min

  8. JAN 7

    Why the New Year Doesn’t Feel the Way You Thought It Would

    By the time this episode reaches you, the new year is already underway. And for many people, this is when a quiet realization sets in: It doesn’t feel the way you thought it would. The calendar changed. The symbolism passed. Life resumed. And instead of clarity, momentum, or relief, there’s often a subtle unease that’s hard to put into words. Not a crisis. Not despair. Just a feeling that something hasn’t quite landed. In this episode, I explore why the beginning of the year so often feels unsettling after the first week. Not because something has gone wrong, but because of how the human mind actually experiences time, identity, and change. Psychological time doesn’t reset when the calendar does. Our habits, emotional patterns, expectations, and unfinished narratives all cross into the new year with us. We talk about the psychology of transition, the discomfort of liminal spaces, and the gap between symbolic fresh starts and lived experience. This is the moment when expectation hangover shows up, when identity hasn’t yet caught up to intention, and when people quietly begin to wonder why they don’t feel more different by now. Rather than offering resolutions, optimism, or self-improvement pressure, this episode gives language to an experience many people are already having but rarely hear explained. Feeling unsettled one week into the year is not a personal failure. It’s a natural response to continuity, uncertainty, and meaning still taking shape. If the new year hasn’t landed the way you expected, this conversation is an invitation to understand that feeling rather than rush past it. I’ll leave that with you. #profrjstarr, #thepsychologyofus, #psychology, #humanbehavior, #selfawareness, #mentalhealth, #existentialpsychology #thepsychologyofbeinghuman

    16 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

The Psychology of Us is an audio archive of psychologically grounded work examining how human beings construct meaning, sustain identity, and orient themselves within emotional and social life. Hosted by RJ Starr, a public intellectual and independent psychology educator, the series approaches psychology as a conceptual discipline rather than a set of techniques or interventions. Episodes engage core psychological structures such as identity, emotion, perception, belief, and moral orientation, treating them as organizing forces rather than symptoms or problems to be solved. The emphasis is on coherence, depth, and interpretive clarity, allowing ideas to be developed fully and situated within a broader psychological framework. This podcast is intended for listeners interested in psychological understanding as a way of seeing more clearly, not as guidance, diagnosis, or professional instruction. Episodes are published as stand-alone work and are meant to be encountered as finished reflections rather than serialized commentary.

Information

  • Creator
    RJ Starr
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    88
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © RJ Starr
  • Show Website
    The Psychology of Us