The Invisible Illness Club | Chronic Illness, Auto Immune

April Aramanda, Invisible Illness Club
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The Invisible Illness Club is a podcast and community for people living with chronic illness and the grief, faith questions, identity shifts, and everyday realities that come with life in a difficult to manage body. Hosted by April, each episode offers honest conversations rooted in Christian faith and lived experience. Here, you do not have to make your pain sound prettier, rush toward a lesson, or pretend you are fine. There is room for grief, anger, uncertainty, laughter, hope, and trusting God in the middle of what has not been fixed. If you have ever felt unseen, misunderstood, or alone in your illness, you belong here. Honest faith for the hard, invisible days. You don’t have to carry this alone.

  1. 1d ago

    079 More Than a Patient: Chronic Illness and Identity with Gwen Mayes

    People saw Gwen Mayes building a career, traveling for work, and speaking in rooms where healthcare decisions were being made. What they often didn’t see was the fear she carried home. She was living with a genetic heart condition while trying to figure out how much of that reality she could safely let other people see. Gwen has spent decades working in healthcare and advocacy, and decades being a patient herself. In this conversation, we talk about what happens when appointments, symptoms, and medical decisions start taking up so much space that it gets harder to remember the rest of who you are. She shares the frightening emergency room experience that changed how she approached her care, and we talk honestly about the work of advocating for yourself when you’re already worn out. We also spend time with the part of illness that follows you home: uncertainty, private worry, changing relationships, and grief that can return when your health changes. Gwen shares how therapy, honest conversations, and remembering moments of joy have helped her care for that part of her life. If you’ve been feeling more like a patient than a person lately, there’s room for you in this conversation. What You'll Learn How Gwen’s childhood experiences and family history shaped the fear she carried into her own diagnosis. Why medical knowledge didn’t spare her the experience of struggling to be heard as a patient. How she prepares for appointments and tracks her own baseline, alongside the exhaustion that patient advocacy can bring. What it can feel like to show the world one version of yourself while managing illness and fear privately. Why grief and uncertainty can return when care needs change, even after years of living with a diagnosis. How Gwen uses mental health support, honest language about limits, and meaningful memories to stay connected to herself. Guest Information Gwen Mayes, JD, MMSc, is an author, patient advocate, former physician assistant, and attorney whose work has included health policy and patient advocacy. She lives with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy and brings experience from both sides of healthcare to her writing and speaking. She is the author of More Person Than Patient: Finding Your Purpose and Power with Chronic Illness, published by Mayo Clinic Press. Learn more about Gwen through WomenHeart Connect with Gwen on LinkedIn Resources More Person Than Patient: Finding Your Purpose and Power with Chronic Illness by Gwen Mayes, the book discussed in this conversation. Its listed release date is November 3, 2026. Related IIC Episodes Ep. 56: When Chronic Illness Changes Your Identity with LA Sprague, another conversation about the ways illness can change how you see yourself. Ep. 58: The Invisible Full-Time Job of Chronic Illness, for the mental workload of appointments, tracking, decisions, and managing your body. Connect with IIC Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_invisibleillnessclub Stay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Credits Hosted by April Aramanda IIC Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

  2. Oct 27

    078 I Love My Life. I Still Miss Who I Was. | Chronic Illness Grief

    I love my life. I love our home, the time I get with my husband, and the little moments that make an ordinary day feel pretty wonderful. So why do I still find myself grieving the woman I used to be? Living with chronic illness has changed what I'm able to do. Things that used to be simple, like laundry, cleaning the house, or taking care of my family, can now leave me dizzy, exhausted, or unable to finish. And sometimes, I really miss being the woman who could do those things without thinking twice. In this solo episode of The Invisible Illness Club, I'm talking about something that can be difficult to explain: loving the life you have while grieving the life and abilities you've lost. We're talking about the frustration of needing help, the fear of becoming a burden, and the guilt that can sneak in when we feel like we're not doing enough. I'm also sharing what I'm learning about my identity, my marriage, and God's love for me when my capacity looks nothing like it used to. Because gratitude doesn't erase grief. And grieving what you've lost doesn't mean you're ungrateful for what you have. What You'll Learn Why gratitude and grief can exist together when you live with chronic illness. How losing independence can affect your identity and sense of worth. Why needing help from someone you love can bring up feelings of guilt. What chronic illness can reveal about the expectations we place on ourselves. How our worth in God's eyes remains unchanged, even when our abilities change. Why enjoying the life you have doesn't require pretending you don't miss your old one. One Tiny Step This week, give yourself permission to acknowledge two things that are true. Think of one thing about your life today that brings you joy. Then think of one thing you miss about the life you had before chronic illness. You don't have to choose between them. You can be grateful for what you have and still grieve what you've lost. And if you're comfortable, bring both of those things to God in prayer. Related Episodes 077 - The Little Losses of Chronic Illness A conversation about the ordinary things we don't realize we'll miss until they're no longer easy. 072 - The Fear That Never Fully Leaves: Living With Chronic Illness Uncertainty Living with the emotional weight of an unpredictable body and learning to receive the good moments. 074 - A Valley of Worship: Faith When You're Still Hurting What it means to bring grief, disappointment, and unanswered questions to God. Connect With The Invisible Illness Club Join The Unseen Sisterhood A weekly note from me about faith, chronic illness, and the messy parts of life we don't always talk about. https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/newsletter Listen to more episodes: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Credits Hosted by April Aramanda The Invisible Illness Club Podcast Music licensed through AudioJungle. This podcast shares personal experiences and encouragement and is not intended as medical advice.

  3. Oct 20

    077 Chronic Illness Keeps Taking Things and I’m Still Grieving | With S.G. Willoughby

    You thought you had made peace with what illness changed. Then your body changed the plans again. Another thing you can’t do. Another conversation about needing help. Another loss you don’t quite know how to explain. Sara “S.G.” Willoughby knows what it is to rebuild a life and become sick again. After years of illness that began when she was fourteen, she experienced a period of improvement, grew into adulthood, and got married. Facing new health challenges brought familiar grief back with some very uncomfortable questions: Why are we doing this again? What was the point of everything I already worked through? Sara and April talk about the exhaustion of ongoing loss, the emotions that can surface after survival mode, and how difficult it can be to receive love when you’re measuring yourself by what you can do. There’s also a practical conversation about marriage, making room for a caregiver’s feelings, and asking for the reassurance you need instead of expecting someone to read your mind. You don’t need a finished lesson to belong in this conversation. There is room for faith, questions, brain fog, a little laughter, and the grief you thought you had already dealt with. In This Episode The small, repeated losses that make chronic illness grief so exhausting Missing teenage milestones and feeling both older and younger than your peers Why grief can surface when your body finally has room to leave survival mode Becoming sick again after recovery and asking God, “What’s the point?” Receiving care without measuring your worth as a spouse by household tasks Honest communication, support for caregivers, and community that understands limited capacity Guest Info S.G. Willoughby is an author and the founder of the Diamonds ministry for Christians with chronic illnesses. Through her writing and community work, Sara makes space for honest conversations about faith and life with ongoing health challenges. She loves dark chocolate and superhero movies and lives in California with her husband. Sara’s website Resources Diamonds ministry and conference Grief resource guide · Email signup Related Episodes Ep. 67: The Things I Never Thought I’d Miss · More room for the ordinary freedoms and experiences illness takes. Ep. 68: The Loneliness of Being Misunderstood By the People You Love · For the gap between being loved and feeling understood. Ep. 63: The Faith Questions We Whisper: Trusting God Through Chronic Illness and Doubt · A companion conversation about bringing the hard questions to God. Connect with IIC Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_invisibleillnessclub Stay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Credits Hosted by April Aramanda IIC Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

  4. Oct 13

    076 Faith Doesn’t Require Lying About What Hurts

    You have prayed. You are still hurting. And a verse about rejoicing can feel very different when the life in front of you is the one you have been asking God to change. In this solo episode of IIC, April walks through Habakkuk’s questions, his waiting, and the words “though” and “yet.” What does trust look like when you still have questions? How do you worship without pretending that pain, disappointment, and grief have disappeared? There is room here to want healing, miss the life you expected, and keep talking to God. April shares a simple writing exercise for holding an honest account of what hurts alongside the faith you can actually express today. In This Episode Bringing the prayer “How long?” to God without polishing it first Facing an answer you do not understand and allowing yourself another question Recognizing faith in small acts of staying and showing up Naming loss honestly without treating it as a failure of faith Rejoicing in God without calling suffering good Writing your own “Though…Yet” prayer without forcing words you do not mean Resources Read Habakkuk 1–3, NIV. Passages discussed include Habakkuk 1:2, 1:5–6, 2:1, 2:4, and 3:17–18. Related Episodes Ep. 74: A Valley of Worship: Faith When You’re Still Hurting, a companion reflection on turning toward God while pain and unanswered questions remain. Ep. 63: The Faith Questions We Whisper: Trusting God Through Chronic Illness and Doubt, for the questions you have felt afraid to say aloud. Connect with IIC Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_invisibleillnessclub Stay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/unseen-sisterhood-newsletter Credits Hosted by April Aramanda IIC Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

  5. Oct 6

    075 When Your Labs Are “Normal” but You Still Feel Sick, with Joy Stephenson-Laws

    The results say everything looks normal. You still feel exhausted, foggy, or unlike yourself. What do you do with the distance between those two things? In this IIC conversation, April talks with healthcare attorney and author Joy Stephenson-Laws about asking questions when lab results have not explained how you feel. Joy shares how her work and her mother’s experiences with medical care shaped her interest in patient advocacy and her book, Your Labs Are Fine. You’re Not. They discuss understanding what was actually tested, approaching supplements with care, checking the information in your medical chart, and preparing for appointments when energy and concentration are limited. Joy also introduces her Feel, Pause, Act framework, a way to acknowledge a feeling, make room to consider it, and choose a response that fits your capacity. There is room here for frustration and unanswered questions. This conversation is an invitation to participate in your care without expecting yourself to become your own doctor. It shares Joy’s perspective and experiences, not a diagnosis or a treatment plan. In This Episode What repeated reassurance can feel like when you still feel unwell Asking what your lab work measured and what questions remain Why a conversation about mineral deficiencies should not become a shopping list of supplements Preparing questions and practical support around your available energy Using Feel, Pause, Act without expecting a perfect response every time Reviewing medical notes and seeking care when something feels different or concerning Guest Info Joy Stephenson-Laws, JD, is a healthcare attorney, author, and founder of Proactive Health Labs. Her work focuses on helping people understand health information and take a more active role in conversations about their care. Visit Proactive Health Labs Resources Your Labs Are Fine. You’re Not. and other books from Proactive Health Labs Proactive Health Labs learning resources, Joy’s educational website discussed in the conversation For additional context, these resources were checked during preparation and are not presented as resources named in the interview: Understanding lab results, MedlinePlus Dietary supplements: what you need to know, NIH Office of Dietary Supplements Related Episodes Ep. 58: The Invisible Full-Time Job of Chronic Illness, for the work of appointments, decisions, and keeping track of your care. Ep. 68: Chronic Illness and the Loneliness of Being Misunderstood, for the emotional weight of trying to explain what someone else cannot see. Connect with IIC Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_invisibleillnessclub Stay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com

  6. Sep 29

    074 A Valley of Worship: Faith When You’re Still Hurting

    You pray for healing and wake up hurting again. You pray for answers, and another test leaves you with more questions. What does worship look like in that kind of waiting? In this episode of The Invisible Illness Club, April reflects on a valley of worship: turning toward God in the middle of pain, disappointment, exhaustion, and prayers that still feel unanswered. Through Habakkuk’s honest questions and the words “though” and “yet,” this conversation explores faith that makes room for what is actually happening. You can bring God your anger, your uncertainty, and the grief of a life that looks different than you expected. You don’t have to arrive with a polished prayer. We talk about: What worship can look like when you don’t feel like singing. The pressure to get your emotions together before coming to God. Habakkuk’s “How long?” and the space Scripture makes for honest questions. Holding pain and trust together without erasing either one. The simple prayer, “God, I’m still here.” If you’re somewhere between “How long?” and “Yet,” there is room for you in this conversation. Scripture explored: Habakkuk 1:2 and 3:17–19. A question to carry with you: What would you tell God today if you didn’t feel pressure to make it sound better? Follow The Invisible Illness Club in your listening app for more honest conversations about faith and chronic illness. If this episode gives words to something you’ve been carrying, you’re welcome to share it with someone who might need that language too. Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the\_invisibleillnessclubStay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.comCredits Hosted by April Aramanda The Invisible Illness Club Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

  7. Sep 22

    073 How Do You Enjoy Life When You're Sick All the Time? with Lauren Watt

    What does it mean to enjoy your life when illness still shapes it? For Lauren Watt, that question includes eight years spent largely in bed, the loss of expected teenage milestones, and the work of building an adult life with ongoing health limitations. Lauren became ill at fourteen. While her peers were learning to drive and graduating, her days were often shaped by pain, fatigue, sensory sensitivity, and the effort of getting through ordinary tasks. Even when her body began to improve, the emotional work was still unfolding. In this episode of The Invisible Illness Club, April and Lauren talk about what it means to make room for a life that is still unfinished. They discuss the vulnerability of needing other people, the fear that being seen on a better day might cost you support, and the grief of reaching milestones on a different timeline. Faith is part of that conversation, including the parts that are difficult to say out loud. Lauren describes finding space for lament, wrestling with prayers that seemed unanswered, and learning that she could bring her own needs to God. They explore the tension between hoping for healing and receiving the life available today. There are also ordinary, specific joys: crochet, art, time outdoors, a bowl of ice cream with family, and a handmade gift that made a child happy. Lauren describes learning to value those moments without needing to justify each one as useful or productive. Lauren also shares her personal experience with trauma work and brain retraining. This episode does not establish the cause of anyone else’s symptoms or offer a treatment plan. Her improvement is not a standard another listener has to meet. If you are grieving the life you expected, wondering how to live with ongoing uncertainty, or trying to notice something good without denying what hurts, this conversation makes room for those questions. In this episode What eight years largely bedridden looked like in daily life Growing up with illness and grieving missed milestones Depending on others when your symptoms are mostly invisible Feeling more experienced in some ways and behind in others Lauren’s experience of trauma work during her recovery Relearning enjoyment and receiving ordinary good things Prayer, lament, and the pressure to sound grateful Accommodations, work, and a slower pace of life Holding a recovery story without turning it into a measure of someone else’s faith About Lauren Lauren Watt is a writer, creative, entrepreneur, and speaker who became chronically ill at fourteen and spent eight years largely bedridden. She now works as a marketing assistant and continues to navigate health limitations. Through Lauren’s Pen, she explores the intersection of faith, trauma, and chronic illness. Connect with Lauren Lauren’s Pen on Substack Lauren’s website Lauren on Instagram Lauren on Facebook Mentioned in the conversation Good News About Self-Care, by Benjamin D. Espinoza Romans 12, NIV Psalm 77, NIV Habakkuk 3:17 to 19, NIV Dynamic Neural Retraining System Restore, with Sarah Jackson The programs above are included because Lauren discusses them in her story. Listing them is not a medical recommendation or a guarantee of results. Content note: This conversation includes severe illness, medical trauma, grief, the death of a friend, and difficult questions about faith and healing. Listen at the pace that feels manageable for you. Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the\_invisibleillnessclubStay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.comCredits Hosted by April Aramanda The Invisible Illness Club Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

  8. Sep 15

    072 What If My Chronic Illness Gets Worse?

    A familiar ache. A lower energy day. A call from the doctor's office. A test result in the patient portal. Sometimes one small moment is enough to send the mind racing toward the next flare, the next cancellation, or the next piece of news that could rearrange life again. The fear is not only about what is happening now. It carries the memory of what your body and heart have already survived. In this episode of The Invisible Illness Club, April names the fear that often remains beneath chronic illness life, even during a good stretch. She talks about symptom vigilance, the pressure to use energy wisely, the strange suspension of waiting for medical answers, and the cost of emotionally living through tomorrow before it arrives. April also makes room for a faith that tells the truth. Trusting God does not mean never feeling afraid. Prayer does not require a calm body or a tidy ending. Sometimes faith sounds like, “God, I'm scared. Please stay with me in the waiting.” You will hear reflections on: Why a small symptom can bring back the memory of an earlier crisis How good days can hold joy, gratitude, pressure, and fear at the same time The invisible work of living in the “maybe” of an unpredictable body The difference between useful preparation and costly emotional bracing Why fear is not proof that you are foolish or faithless How to ask what you actually know and need in this moment What it can mean to let fear be present without giving it every decision How honest prayer can hold fear, grief, uncertainty, and trust together The future may remain uncertain, but you do not have to live every possible tomorrow today. The good moments do not have to promise permanence before you are allowed to receive them. Follow The Invisible Illness Club in your podcast app so new episodes are waiting for you. Content note This episode discusses medical uncertainty, flare anxiety, test results, and waiting for calls from a doctor's office. Please listen when you have the capacity for those subjects. Links & Resources Join The Unseen Sisterhood https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/newsletter Listen to the podcast https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com/podcasts Visit the website https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the\_invisibleillnessclub Stay connected Subscribe for honest conversations about chronic illness, faith, emotional exhaustion, boundaries, rest, and building a meaningful life inside limitation. Join The Unseen Sisterhood: https://www.theinvisibleillnessclub.com Credits Hosted by April Aramanda The Invisible Illness Club Podcast Music via AudioJungle This podcast is for encouragement and shared experience, not medical advice. Please talk with your doctor or care team about your own health decisions.

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The Invisible Illness Club is a podcast and community for people living with chronic illness and the grief, faith questions, identity shifts, and everyday realities that come with life in a difficult to manage body. Hosted by April, each episode offers honest conversations rooted in Christian faith and lived experience. Here, you do not have to make your pain sound prettier, rush toward a lesson, or pretend you are fine. There is room for grief, anger, uncertainty, laughter, hope, and trusting God in the middle of what has not been fixed. If you have ever felt unseen, misunderstood, or alone in your illness, you belong here. Honest faith for the hard, invisible days. You don’t have to carry this alone.

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