All Things Conflict

Maria Arpa MBE
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Who doesn't have conflict in their lives? Whether at work, at home or somewhere out in the world we are all affected by conflict even when it is indirect. The impact of poorly managed conflict can devastate lives. With 30 years’ experience mediating conflict and training peacemakers, Maria has held people’s hearts through everything from workplace hostility, board room battles, belligerent teenagers, separated parents at loggerheads to neighbours at war, street gang rivalries, threats to life and business deals gone wrong. In this podcast Maria lifts the lid on why we fight and how we can resolve conflict and design it out of our lives. Maria’s mission is to reduce unnecessary human suffering through conscious awareness, facilitated dialogue and trauma healing, using her communications tool, the Dialogue Road Map.

  1. 24M AGO

    Beyond the One-Punch Attack: How 14 Months Changed Two Families Forever

    In this deeply moving episode of All Things Conflict - Justice Redesigned, Maria sits down with Joan, a mother whose life was irrevocably changed in 2011 when her son was killed in a "one-punch" attack. While many would remain locked in a cycle of bitterness and anger, Joan chose a different path—one that led her to the heart of Restorative Justice. Joan shares the raw reality of her journey: from the initial fury of losing her son to the groundbreaking decision to meet his attacker, Jacob, face-to-face. This conversation explores the transformative power of being heard, the flaws in the "manslaughter" sentencing guidelines, and the incredible friendship that emerged from a tragedy. Joan’s story is a powerful testament to the fact that forgiveness isn't about forgetting; it’s about healing the "lion’s den" and finding a way forward for two families caught in the same tragedy. Key Takeaways The Weight of "One Punch": Understanding the devastating impact of a single moment of violence and how it ripples through a community, affecting both the victim's and the offender's families. Moving Beyond Bitterness: Joan discusses her transition from being "very bitter and very angry" to realizing that holding onto hatred was only hurting her own healing process. The Power of the Face-to-Face Meeting: The pivotal moment when Joan met Jacob in prison. She describes how seeing his remorse and his own "lost" nature allowed her to see him as a human being rather than just a "monster." Flaws in the Justice System: A critique of the current sentencing for manslaughter (often as low as 14 months), which Joan argues fails to reflect the value of the life lost or provide adequate time for rehabilitation. Restorative Justice as a Right: Why Joan believes every victim of a serious crime should be offered the opportunity to participate in Restorative Justice as a standard part of the legal process. The Impact of "Punch": A look at how Joan’s story was adapted into a successful play, helping to educate the public on the consequences of violence and the possibility of reconciliation. Two Families, One Tragedy: The unique perspective that Jacob’s family also suffered a loss, and how the two families eventually found common ground and support in each other. Social Links ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠ Resources mentioned https://www.theforgivenessproject.com/ https://www.commongroundjustice.uk/ The Play - Punch https://punchtheplay.com/uk-tour/

    29 min

  2. FEB 25

    The Sentence With No End: Surviving the IPP Prison Scandal

    Appologies for the guests internet connection! In this deeply moving episode of All Things Conflict - Justice Redesigned, Maria Arpa sits down with Andrew Morris, an advocate and survivor of the Imprisonment for Public Protection (IPP) sentence. Described as one of the most significant human rights stains on the UK justice system, the IPP sentence has left thousands of individuals in a state of "legal limbo" trapped in prison indefinitely with no set release date. Andrew shares his firsthand account of the psychological "torture" inherent in indeterminate sentencing, where hope is systematically stripped away and replaced by a cycle of despair and high-stakes recall. We explore the staggering statistics of the 2,700+ people still caught in this system, the tragic rates of self-harm and suicide, and the systemic failure of "abolition without retrospection." This is a conversation about the desperate need for Healing Justice and the human faces behind the forgotten statistics. Key Takeaways The Definition of "Indeterminate": Unlike standard sentences, an IPP sentence has a minimum "tariff" but no maximum end date. Once the tariff expires, the prisoner is not released until they can prove to a Parole Board they are no longer a risk - a test that is notoriously difficult to pass. The Psychological "Torture": Andrew describes the mental health impact of not having a release date. Without a "finish line," the brain enters a constant state of fight-or-flight, leading to catastrophic levels of self-harm and hopelessness within the IPP population. Abolition Without Retrospection: While the IPP sentence was abolished in 2012 because it was deemed unjust, the law was not made retrospective. This left thousands of people serving a sentence that the government admitted should never have existed. The "Recall" Trap: Even after release, IPP prisoners are on license for at least 10 years (previously for life). A minor technicality or a single mistake can lead to an immediate return to prison with no clear path back out. The Suicide Crisis: The episode highlights the harrowing reality that the IPP population has some of the highest rates of suicide and self-harm in the entire prison estate, driven by the lack of a "light at the end of the tunnel." Healing Justice vs. Punitive Justice: Andrew argues for a shift toward "Healing Justice"—a system that prioritises rehabilitation, emotional intelligence, and empathy over bureaucratic box-ticking and endless punishment. The Role of Lived Experience: Why it is essential for survivors like Andrew to lead the conversation on reform, as they understand the visceral reality of the system in a way policymakers cannot. Social Links ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠ Andrew Morris https://howardleague.org/andrew-morris/ https://www.instagram.com/thehowardleague/

    52 min

  3. FEB 18

    Empire of Dirt: From High-Level Drug Trafficking to Prison Reform Architect

    In this riveting episode of All Things Conflict - Justice Redesigned, Maria welcomes Andrew Pritchard, a man who lived an extraordinary life as a high-level "architect" of global supply lines and criminal empires. After a spectacular collapse that led to a 15-year sentence in some of Britain’s toughest high-security prisons, Andrew didn't just serve time—he studied the system. Andrew shares his journey from the streets of North London to the high-security wings of Belmarsh and Whitemoor. He discusses the powerful moment of remorse that changed his trajectory and how he utilised his entrepreneurial skills to reduce prison violence by 97%. This conversation explores the "Hindsight" curriculum, the reality of "Joint Enterprise" laws, and a radical vision for a self-sustaining, non-profit prison system. Key Takeaways The Reality of Remorse: Andrew distinguishes between "feeling sorry for yourself" because of a long sentence and true remorse, which comes from finally recognising the destructive impact of one's actions on thousands of victims. The Postcode Trap: A tragic look at how young "enemies" in prison often discover they share deep family connections but remain locked in violent conflicts over postcodes they don't even own. Joint Enterprise & Legal Pitfalls: Andrew critiques how the legal system and unscrupulous law firms use "Joint Enterprise" to secure easy convictions, often landing young people 30-year sentences for crimes they didn't personally commit. The 97% Success Rate: While in Belmarsh, Andrew and other senior prisoners created a mediation program that utilised "spotters" to identify gang members at reception, successfully resolving nearly all internal conflicts. The "Hindsight" Curriculum: A proposal to replace useless prison courses (like "money management" for drug smugglers) with entrepreneurial training that applies a criminal's existing skills to legitimate, low-risk business models. Maslow’s Hierarchy in Prison: Understanding that a prisoner’s focus shifts from survival to relationships and eventually to a desire for recognition and legacy as they age. The Non-Profit Prison Model: A radical idea to replace for-profit private prisons with self-sustaining communities where inmates run businesses to pay for their own keep, creating a zero-cost system for taxpayers. A Message of Hope: Andrew’s life proves that even from a "rock bottom" situation, it is possible to rise, change, and leave a positive legacy for the next generation. Andrew Pritchard Andrew's Book - Empire of Dirt https://www.amazon.co.uk/Empire-Dirt-Identity-Corruption-Redemption/dp/1919372601 Andrews Website www.apfoundation.org.uk Social Links ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com This podcast is distributed by Disruptive Media

    56 min

  4. FEB 11

    The High Cost of Divorce: Moving Beyond 'Legalese' to Protect Your Family’s Future

    In this episode of Justice Redesigned, host Maria sits down with Kristyna Hawkett, founder of the Minus One Club and a dedicated divorce and separation coach. Kristyna describes the experience of divorce not as a journey, but as an "emotional earthquake" that leaves families scrambling to repair structural damage while facing ongoing aftershocks. We dive deep into the staggering reality of the family court system, where over 14,000 new applications are filed quarterly, affecting more than 20,000 children every three months. Kristyna explains how "legalese" and the adversarial nature of the justice system can strip parents of their confidence, leaving them feeling "incapable" and "scared". This conversation is a must-listen for anyone looking to navigate separation with humanity, protect their children from systemic trauma, and avoid the devastating financial and emotional costs of a high-conflict court battle. Key Takeaways The Myth of the "Winning" Parent: In the world of divorce, there are no winners; the biggest losers are almost always the children. The Emotional Earthquake: Divorce isn't just a legal process; it is a traumatic event that affects the entire family dynamic, including grandparents, aunts, and uncles. The Dangers of "Legalese": Entering the justice system introduces a confusing language (jargon) that can make parents feel vulnerable and reduce their confidence in decision-making. The Judge’s Perspective: Contrary to popular belief, family court judges have very little time (often under 40 minutes) to review cases and have low tolerance for co-parent "squabbling". Systemic Overload: Every three months, under 2,300 Cafcass workers are tasked with interviewing and reporting on the lives of over 20,000 children. The Financial Toll: High-conflict court battles can lead to families losing up to half the value of their home in legal fees over just a couple of years. A Radical Proposal: Christina advocates for an "in-between stage" after filing an application but before seeing a judge, designed to divert families toward resolving their own issues and protecting children from social care intervention. SOCIAL LINKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ Kristyna Links https://www.minusone.club/ https://uk.linkedin.com/in/kristyna-hawkett8 HOST BIO Maria founded the Centre for Peaceful Solutions in response to the fatal shooting of a 7 year old in her neighbourhood. She developed a model of conflict resolution for violent crime using her brainchild, the Dialogue Road Map (DRM).   Over 30 years she has mediated everything from threat to life gang disputes to high stakes business deals gone wrong, Maria empowers people to resolve conflict without reliance on experts. So she trains violent prisoners to be facilitators, leaders to be effective communicators, teenagers to be peer mediators and neighbours to be tenant listeners within their respective communities. This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

    34 min

  5. FEB 4

    The Belonging Framework: Fostering Intersectionality and Community in Young LGBT+ Lives

    In this episode of Justice Redesigned, host Maria Alper sits down with Lukasz Konieczka, the founder and CEO of Mosaic, a charity supporting LGBT+ young people. Lukasz, an expert on intersectionality and social justice, discusses his "Belonging Framework" and how it serves as a pragmatic tool for fostering inclusion across both the non-profit and corporate sectors. The conversation dives deep into the systemic issues plaguing modern society, from the "domination culture" that fuels transphobia and hate crimes to a piercing critique of how capitalism necessitates exploitation. Lukasz also shares a radical vision for the future of the penal system, arguing for a shift toward the "Dutch model" of prisons where dignity and humanity are restored to those in care. Key Takeaways The Belonging Framework: Originally designed for LGBT+ youth, this framework identifies specific behaviors that contribute to a person feeling they truly belong within an organization. The "Canary in the Mine": Trans women are often the first to be attacked in a regressing society; Lukasz notes that when oppression against one group increases, hate crimes across other categories typically rise as well. Agency and Longevity: Providing individuals with even small choices—a sense of agency—is scientifically linked to increased well-being and life expectancy, particularly in controlled environments like nursing homes or schools. Capitalism as Injustice: Lukasz argues that capitalism inherently functions through the "theft" of labor and natural resources, prioritizing individualism and profit over sustainable social solutions. The Dutch Prison Model: A plea to move away from dehumanizing, high-security environments in favor of simulated "outside world" environments that treat residents with dignity, privacy, and humanity. Intersectionality in Care: Effective support requires challenging internal biases (such as racism or sexism) even within marginalized communities to ensure young people become part of the solution rather than the problem. SOCIAL LINKS ⁠⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠⁠⁠ Lukasz Links https://www.mosaictrust.org.uk/ https://uk.linkedin.com/in/lukaszkonieczka HOST BIO Maria founded the Centre for Peaceful Solutions in response to the fatal shooting of a 7 year old in her neighbourhood. She developed a model of conflict resolution for violent crime using her brainchild, the Dialogue Road Map (DRM).   Over 30 years she has mediated everything from threat to life gang disputes to high stakes business deals gone wrong, Maria empowers people to resolve conflict without reliance on experts. So she trains violent prisoners to be facilitators, leaders to be effective communicators, teenagers to be peer mediators and neighbours to be tenant listeners within their respective communities. This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. ⁠⁠⁠https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/⁠⁠

    59 min

  6. JAN 28

    Beyond the Black and White: Using Mediation and Empathy Training to Redesign Criminal Justice

    In this episode of All Things Conflict, Maria sits down with Issy Adamopoulos , a mediator and barrister called to the bar who has dedicated her academic career to uncovering the systemic flaws in the UK legal system. Issy shares insights from her two groundbreaking dissertations on institutional racism and institutional misogyny within the justice system. Together, they challenge the traditional "black and white" view of guilt and punishment. Issy argues that the current penal system is failing society by dehumanising individuals and ignoring the complex, traumatic contexts that lead to crime. From discussing the "Scandinavian model" of rehabilitation to the radical potential of implementing mediation at every stage of the legal process, this conversation reimagines a justice system built on humanity, education, and empathy. Key Takeaways The Failure of Punishment: Punishment is often used to satisfy victims' families, but research shows that dehumanising treatment in prison actually increases the likelihood of reoffending upon release. The Root of Institutional Bias: Systemic racism in stop-and-search and misogyny in sexual assault investigations often stem from unconscious biases and a lack of education on how trauma affects memory and behavior. Mediation as a Systemic Tool: Mediation should not just be an alternative; it should be integrated throughout the entire criminal justice process—from arrest to the courtroom—to uncover the "why" behind actions and restore humanity to the process. Context Matters: We cannot fairly punish individuals for reactions to unfortunate circumstances or societal failings without addressing the root causes and individual trauma. Malleability of Memory: The legal system relies on black-and-white evidence, but human memory is scientifically proven to be malleable, meaning inconsistencies in a victim's or perpetrator's story are often a natural human journey rather than malicious lying. A New Educational Standard: Radical reform starts with empathy training and a deep education on colonial history and patriarchal values starting from a young age. SOCIAL LINKS ⁠⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠⁠ ⁠⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠⁠ ⁠⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠⁠ HOST BIO Maria founded the Centre for Peaceful Solutions in response to the fatal shooting of a 7 year old in her neighbourhood. She developed a model of conflict resolution for violent crime using her brainchild, the Dialogue Road Map (DRM).   Over 30 years she has mediated everything from threat to life gang disputes to high stakes business deals gone wrong, Maria empowers people to resolve conflict without reliance on experts. So she trains violent prisoners to be facilitators, leaders to be effective communicators, teenagers to be peer mediators and neighbours to be tenant listeners within their respective communities. This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. ⁠⁠https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/⁠

    30 min

  7. JAN 21

    Beyond Charitable Sympathy: Finding Social Justice in the Present Moment

    In this episode of All Things Conflict, we explore the "internal emotional landscape" that dictates how we engage with the world. Our guest David Ellis argues that modern society is built on a "domination culture" of competition and excellence that fundamentally clashes with the heart of social justice. By moving away from institutional "head-knowledge" and toward heart-led empathy, we uncover a radical new way to view human connection from the way we treat people on the street to how we could completely overhaul the Ministry of Justice. We dive into the concept of "Clink Ink," a visionary proposal to transform prisons from warehouses of punishment into creative business hubs where inmates pay for their own keep through entrepreneurship and restitution. Key Takeaways The Myth of Competition: The drive to be "better" than others often acts as a shadow that prevents us from achieving true social balance. Conscience over Morals: While ethics are developed to help our minds understand fairness, "conscience" is the immediate feeling that something isn't right—a voice often drowned out by the speed of modern life. Heart-Led Social Justice: True justice isn't just about the distribution of wealth; it is about how we care for one another on a moment-by-moment basis without the filter of social "propaganda" or fear. Empathy vs. Sympathy: Charitable sympathy often maintains the status quo, whereas empathy creates a sustainable mechanism for change. Radical Prison Reform (Clink Ink): By treating the prison population as "customers" with creative intelligence, we can build successful companies (banks, insurance, etc.) inside walls that allow for proper restitution and learning. The Natural Will to Give: Every human has a genuine desire to join in and offer something; the "no" we often hear is usually just a temporary conditioning or a self-imposed wound getting in the way. SOCIAL LINKS ⁠www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org⁠ ⁠www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk⁠ ⁠www.workplacehuddle.com⁠ HOST BIO Maria founded the Centre for Peaceful Solutions in response to the fatal shooting of a 7 year old in her neighbourhood. She developed a model of conflict resolution for violent crime using her brainchild, the Dialogue Road Map (DRM).   Over 30 years she has mediated everything from threat to life gang disputes to high stakes business deals gone wrong, Maria empowers people to resolve conflict without reliance on experts. So she trains violent prisoners to be facilitators, leaders to be effective communicators, teenagers to be peer mediators and neighbours to be tenant listeners within their respective communities. This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. ⁠https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

    42 min

  8. JAN 14

    Creating Safe Spaces: The Art of Facilitating Difficult Conversations

    In this episode of "All Things Conflict," Maria hosts Fiona Ruttle. They delve into the transformative power of conflict resolution and the importance of fostering understanding in challenging situations. Fiona shares her profound experiences working in prisons, where she witnessed the humanisation of individuals often seen as "monsters." The conversation explores the role of effective communication, the significance of listening, and the need for safe spaces to navigate conflicts. They discuss the impact of personal role models on conflict management and the potential for healing relationships through dialogue. The episode culminates in a vision for justice redesign, advocating for alternatives to incarceration that prioritise rehabilitation and community engagement, highlighting the potential for individuals to flourish when given the right support. KEY TAKEAWAYS Transformative Power of Dialogue: Engaging in facilitated conversations, such as those using the dialogue roadmap and non-violent communication, can transform relationships and break down barriers, even in challenging environments like prisons. Conflict as an Opportunity: Conflict should not be viewed solely as a negative experience. Instead, it can be an opportunity for growth, understanding, and creativity, allowing individuals to navigate tensions and emerge with stronger connections. Role of Listening: Active listening is a crucial skill in conflict resolution. Allowing the person with the least awareness to speak first can create a safe space for dialogue and foster empathy, leading to more constructive outcomes. Importance of Safe Containers: Establishing a safe environment for discussions, whether in personal relationships or community mediation, is essential for addressing conflicts without escalating tensions. This includes setting boundaries around topics that are too sensitive to discuss initially. Community-Based Solutions: Alternatives to incarceration, such as rehabilitation programs that focus on personal growth and community reintegration, can be more effective than traditional punitive measures. Engaging communities in the resolution process can lead to more sustainable and positive outcomes. SOCIAL LINKS www.centreforpeacefulsolutions.org www.peacefulsolutions.org.uk www.workplacehuddle.com HOST BIO Maria founded the Centre for Peaceful Solutions in response to the fatal shooting of a 7 year old in her neighbourhood. She developed a model of conflict resolution for violent crime using her brainchild, the Dialogue Road Map (DRM).   Over 30 years she has mediated everything from threat to life gang disputes to high stakes business deals gone wrong, Maria empowers people to resolve conflict without reliance on experts. So she trains violent prisoners to be facilitators, leaders to be effective communicators, teenagers to be peer mediators and neighbours to be tenant listeners within their respective communities. This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

    42 min
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About

Who doesn't have conflict in their lives? Whether at work, at home or somewhere out in the world we are all affected by conflict even when it is indirect. The impact of poorly managed conflict can devastate lives. With 30 years’ experience mediating conflict and training peacemakers, Maria has held people’s hearts through everything from workplace hostility, board room battles, belligerent teenagers, separated parents at loggerheads to neighbours at war, street gang rivalries, threats to life and business deals gone wrong. In this podcast Maria lifts the lid on why we fight and how we can resolve conflict and design it out of our lives. Maria’s mission is to reduce unnecessary human suffering through conscious awareness, facilitated dialogue and trauma healing, using her communications tool, the Dialogue Road Map.

Information

  • Creator
    Maria Arpa MBE
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    53
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Show Website
    All Things Conflict