The RelateGREAT! Podcast with Jonathan Sherman and Friends

Jonathan Sherman
  • 4.9 (20)
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My name is Jonathan Sherman, LMFT. I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, author, and speaker. We all want better relationships with our families, others, and ourselves. Over 30 years as a therapist, I’ve met a lot of cool people who know a lot of cool relationship and psych stuff. These fascinating friends will be my guests. Join us, and together, let’s learn from them. ▶︎▶︎▶︎ EPISODE TOPIC CATEGORIES:◀︎◀︎◀︎ ➡️ Unspecified: Some episodes may not fit a specific category and are not marked differently. ➡️ Abuse/Narci: Abuse and narcissism-related. ➡️ Addiction ➡️ Affairs: About affairs and affair recovery. ➡️ Call-In Show: I hold a live call-in show on the first Monday of every month, which is then turned into episodes for this podcast. Visit RelateGREAT.net/podcast for details and how to call in. ➡️ Communication ➡️ Divorce ➡️ Dating: How to attract the best. For singles at any age and stage in the dating scene. ➡️ Funny: Sometimes I do funny or satirical episodes, such as my Free BAD Advice column. ➡️ GR Masters: The GREAT Relationship Masters Series showcases real-life couples who share with us what has worked for them. Also, visit my GR Masters Blog for more great couples at RrelateGREAT.net/the-great-relationship-masters. ➡️ Marriage ➡️ Money ➡️ Parenting ➡️ Self-Mastery ➡️ Sex: Sex and intimacy, which while related, are not always synonymous. ➡️ Therapy: Topics about therapy, doing therapy, going into the field of therapy, or what it’s like being a therapist. ➡️ Workshop: Is for the Workshop Archive. I’ve recorded many of my workshops over the years. I’ll share some of the most requested ones here.

Episodes

  1. 008 | “Better Sex & Connected Intimacy” with my friend, sex coach Xanet Pailet

    12/17/2025

    008 | “Better Sex & Connected Intimacy” with my friend, sex coach Xanet Pailet

    In this episode of The RelateGREAT! Podcast, Jonathan welcomes Xanet Pailet (pronounced "zhuh-nay pay-let"), bestselling author and founder of Passionate Intimacy Retreats, to discuss overcoming intimacy challenges and living an enriching, orgasmic life. Xanet shares her journey from a sexless 26-year marriage to becoming a sex and intimacy educator, emphasizing the importance of somatic experiences in healing and connection. The conversation covers practical tips for couples to enhance their intimacy, the differences between traditional talk therapy and experiential approaches, and how to create a safe, judgment-free sexual playground. Xanet offers actionable advice and resources, including her books and retreats, to help couples reignite passion and build deeper emotional connections. 00:30 Introduction to Xanet Pailet 01:56 Personal Journey and Name Change 03:58 Transition to Sex and Intimacy Educator 07:58 Understanding Somatic Approaches 10:02 Challenges in a Sexless Marriage 16:35 Discovering Tantra and Healing 21:25 Practical Tips for Intimacy 29:17 The Pressure to Perform and Misattunement 29:33 Coaching Couples: Hands-On Guidance 30:45 Creating a Safe Playground for Couples 32:56 Program Overview: Passionate Intimacy Retreats 34:23 Experiential and Interactive Exercises 35:23 The Importance of Repair in Relationships 38:52 Differences Between Talk Therapy and Experiential Therapy 45:15 Upcoming Retreats and Final Thoughts 48:20 Message of Hope and Free Gift

    54 min
  2. 007 | “Mess and Mental Health - The Hidden Shame of Clutter” with my friends the Pahl Sisters, Decluttering Experts

    10/07/2025

    007 | “Mess and Mental Health - The Hidden Shame of Clutter” with my friends the Pahl Sisters, Decluttering Experts

    ▶︎▶︎ EPISODE NOTES In this episode of the Relate Great podcast, host Jonathan Sherman is joined by Chelsea Paul and Karissa Pahl from All of You Services, a cleaning company that goes beyond traditional cleaning to address mental health struggles. Jonathan discovered Chelsea through a heartfelt social media post highlighting the connection between depression and overwhelming mess. Chelsea and Karissa share their approach to helping clients declutter and deep clean their homes without judgment, emphasizing the therapeutic benefits of a tidy space. They discuss the emotional and relational impacts of living in disorganized environments, their personal connection to mental health issues like ADHD, and their unique teamwork dynamics. The episode concludes with practical advice for listeners feeling overwhelmed by clutter. 00:00 Introduction to Chelsea's Post on Depression and Messiness 02:44 Mental Health and Cleaning: A Deeper Connection 03:29 Client Experiences and Vulnerability 06:12 The Process of Decluttering and Organizing 08:58 Challenges and Boundaries in Cleaning 10:42 The Emotional Impact of a Clean Space 21:16 The Sisters' Journey into Cleaning 25:13 Hyper-Focused and Satisfied 26:08 Family Therapist Insights 26:23 Navigating Family Business Dynamics 27:24 Communication Challenges and Strategies 31:50 Impact of Home Organization on Relationships 40:13 Tips for Listeners: Cleaning and Mindset Hacks 44:07 Final Thoughts and Contact Information Referenced Resources: Original post with pics Website: All of You Services Facebook: facebook.com/allofyouservices Episode Page: RelateGREAT.net/podcast/007-mess-and-mental-health

    47 min
  3. 006 | Parenting: “7 Ways to Connect with Your Kids and Teens.” Interview with Jonathan.

    09/08/2025

    006 | Parenting: “7 Ways to Connect with Your Kids and Teens.” Interview with Jonathan.

    ▶︎▶︎ EPISODE NOTES In this episode, Jonathan Sherman, a marriage and family therapist, offers seven crucial parenting tips. The advice stems from a presentation he gave at a conference and an interview with young clinicians from Utah Youth Village. The key areas covered include understanding your child's world, allowing feedback, avoiding power struggles, the importance of both quality and quantity time, fostering good relationships with teenagers from an early age, being interested in your child's interests, and the value of appreciation. Sherman shares personal anecdotes and professional insights, encouraging parents to grow and adapt alongside their children while maintaining patience, presence, and authentic communication. ▶︎▶︎ HIGHLIGHTS 01:24 1. Make an effort to understand your child’s world 02:11 2. Allow kids to give you feedback 05:26 3. Not engaging in power struggles allows kids to teach us -- Lesson from a 13-year-old rebel 12:37 4. Quality time is a function of quantity time - Patience and Presence. 16:07 5. Relationships With Teenagers Starts When They’re Young 18:32 6. Be interested in the things that interest your kids 21:19 7. Appreciation is a cushion ▶︎▶︎ Referenced Resources: The 7 Principles for Building a Strong Family book and online masterclass. • RESOLVE conflict, • IMPROVE communication, • INCREASE bonding, and • SECURE attachments with your partner and your kids. My 7 Principles for Building Strong Families workbook and online course will help you, your partner, and your family overcome problems and create truly GREAT relationships that last a lifetime. Enroll today and get the workbook at RelateGREAT.net/strongfam

    24 min
  4. 005 | The Call-in Show: “Dating Disasters!” Part 2

    08/11/2025

    005 | The Call-in Show: “Dating Disasters!” Part 2

    ▶︎▶︎ EPISODE NOTES In this episode of the RelateGREAT! Podcast with Jonathan Sherman, listeners are treated to a variety of dating stories during the second part of a two-part call-in show focused on dating disasters. The episode features 12 callers, including Jonathan's son Adam, who shares his high-school dating mishap. Other callers like Peyton and wife Lauren narrate their humorous and awkward relationship beginnings, and Austin recounts his clumsy journey from heartbreak to finding true love. Xerxes and Laurene share their long-term marriage experiences, emphasizing the importance of mutual respect and friendship in enduring relationships. Jonathan Sherman, a marriage and family therapist, also shares insights drawn from John Gottman's relationship research, highlighting the significance of friendship and admiration in successful marriages. ▶︎▶︎ HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 The Call-in Show: Dating Disasters! Part 2 00:54 Adam's High School Date 05:54 Caller Peyton and Lauren's Awkward Beginnings 17:23 Caller Austin's Nervousness 17:40 Introduction to the Writing Group 18:42 Austin's Clunky Love Story 20:42 The Turning Point in Austin's Relationship 24:45 The Proposal and Marriage 31:33 Reflections on Marriage and Friendship 36:00 Xerxes' Story of 32 Years of Marriage 43:01 Laurene's Bad Date and Love Story 49:13 Conclusion and Future Plans Referenced Resources: None

    51 min
  5. 004 | The Call-in Show: “Dating Disasters!” Part 1

    07/28/2025

    004 | The Call-in Show: “Dating Disasters!” Part 1

    ▶︎▶︎ EPISODE NOTES In the debut episode of the Relate Great Podcast Call-In Show, hosted by marriage and family therapist Jonathan Sherman, listeners dive into real-life stories about dating disasters. Jonathan introduces the podcast's format and themes, focusing on humorous, touching, and sometimes tragic tales from the dating world. Callers share their personal experiences, ranging from shocking first dates to heartfelt reflections on lessons learned in relationships. The episode also offers insightful relationship principles and promotes Jonathan's online masterclass on building strong families. ▶︎▶︎ HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 The Call-in Show: Dating Disasters! Part 1 00:24 Introduction to the Relate Great Podcast 00:58 Podcast Format and Future Plans 01:39 Dating Scene Insights and Stories 05:12 Mindy's Dating Disaster 08:47 Jess's Relationship Struggles 15:34 Kara's Awkward Concert Date 20:57 Angel's Unforgettable First Date 27:50 Larissa's Long-Winded Date 31:46 The Unimpressive Husband 32:16 Dating Stories at Family Parties 32:53 Planning Future Episodes 33:51 Caller Taylor's Story 40:36 Mindy's Lovebomber Referenced Resources: None

    52 min
  6. 003 | Communication: "The Pursue-Withdraw Dynamic" with my friend Emil Harker, LMFT

    06/17/2025

    003 | Communication: "The Pursue-Withdraw Dynamic" with my friend Emil Harker, LMFT

    ▶︎▶︎ EPISODE NOTES In this episode of the RelateGREAT! Podcast, licensed marriage and family therapists Emil Harker, LMFT, and Jonathan Sherman, LMFT, delve into the pursue-withdraw dynamic often seen in relationships. This is a re-broadcast of an episode Emil did on a former podcast he was involved with. They discuss the motivations behind pursuing and withdrawing behaviors and how these can create a damaging cycle if not managed properly. Jonathan and Emil share practical strategies for both pursuers and withdrawers to break the cycle and foster healthier communication and connections. By emphasizing the importance of safety and understanding, they offer actionable advice to help listeners strengthen their relationships and avoid common pitfalls. ▶︎▶︎ HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 Introduction: The Art of Listening 00:25 Stop, Look, and Listen: Practical Tips 01:40 Meet Emil Harker: A Trusted Therapist 04:20 Exploring the Pursue-Withdraw Dynamic 04:53 Common Terms and Misconceptions 05:56 The Pursue-Withdraw Cycle in Relationships 08:05 Gender Patterns and Topic-Based Dynamics 12:12 Managing the Pursue-Withdraw Dynamic 14:52 Understanding the Pursuit of Sex and Power 15:22 The Emptiness of Pursuit 16:59 The Pursue-Withdraw Dynamic 17:09 Why Do People Withdraw? 20:26 The Role of Fear in Withdrawal 20:52 Strategies for Pursuers and Withdrawers 23:46 The Importance of Safety in Relationships 26:56 Effective Communication Techniques 30:12 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Referenced Resources: Emil Harker’s website Get Emil’s book!

    32 min
  7. 002 | "On Stuckness and Getting Unstuckified" with my friend Gary Klein, LCSW

    06/10/2025

    002 | "On Stuckness and Getting Unstuckified" with my friend Gary Klein, LCSW

    Episode Notes This episode explores the idea that most mental and emotional issues boil down to feeling stuck. They share insights using anecdotes, metaphors, and humor while discussing basic cognitive-behavioral techniques to get 'unstuck.' They highlight the importance of distinguishing between self-worth and self-esteem, recognizing guilt versus shame, and the power of repetition in changing behaviors. The host and guest also entertain with a playful banter about outlandish ideas like selling P tubes and certificates to metaphorically and humorously address the concept of being stuck. In this lighthearted and informative episode, listeners are offered both laughter and practical advice on enhancing their mental health. Timestamps 00:00 Introduction and Podcast Origins 01:14 Welcome to the Heavy Mental Hour 01:59 Understanding Stuckness in Therapy 04:55 The Concept of Certificates 11:00 Guilt vs. Shame 17:18 The Mechanics of Change 29:30 Visualizing the Problem 30:40 Changing Thoughts and Behaviors 31:02 Therapeutic Models and Their Evolution 31:50 Milton Erickson's Innovative Techniques 36:07 The Pee Pipe Story 44:27 Self-Worth vs. Self-Esteem 52:46 The Rarity of Human Life 55:33 Humor and Therapy 57:09 Conclusion and Outtakes Highlights: ;-) Certificates: Abdication of Responsibility, etc. ;-) Triangulation: The Wacky Therapy Game! 3 Rules for Guilt Guilt vs. Shame Brain Mechanics: Our 3 Brains (thinking, emotional, primitive) CBT The frozen locomotive 100K reps We are slow, social learners vs. instinctual knowledge (cp to Pepper’s puppies) The “Comma, Yet...” Drawing: The Box Solution Focus vs. watering the weeds The Umbrella Milton Erickson and the "Pee Pipe" story here. Self-worth and self-esteem ;-) Certificate of Self-Esteem Thought-stopping ;-) Product: Pee Pipe Kit ;-) Glutton for Punishment Certificate Referenced Resources: Guest Blogger: Gary Klein on Stress & Stuckness Gary Klein, LCSW’s professional profile and contact info

    59 min
  8. 001 | GR Masters: “Two Sisters, Two Marriages” with my friends Kara Sherman and Kristen Sagers

    05/22/2025

    001 | GR Masters: “Two Sisters, Two Marriages” with my friends Kara Sherman and Kristen Sagers

    Episode Notes In this episode, part of The GREAT Relationship Masters Series (GR Masters), I talk to two sisters about their two marriages. My wife, Kara Sherman, and her sister, Kristen Sagers, giggle their way through sharing tips about having a successful marriage. Highlights 01:58 Marriage Statistics and Realities 02:51 Examples of Good and Bad Marriages 05:16 Kristen's Marriage Story 08:29 Kara's Marriage Story 28:52 What They Like About Their Husbands 39:12 Reflecting on Personal Growth 39:41 The Importance of Communication in Marriage 46:06 Navigating Conflict and Anger 50:35 The Evolution of Love 59:16 Advice for Young Couples 01:10:00 The Role of Communication and Understanding 01:12:40 Final Thoughts on MarriageTHE 7 PRINCIPLES FOR BUILDING STRONG FAMILIES Online Course and Workbook: Get the book! Take the class! And start today to learn how to: • RESOLVE conflict, • IMPROVE communication, • INCREASE bonding, and • SECURE attachments with your partner and your kids. My 7 Principles for Building Strong Families workbook and online course will help you, your partner, and your family overcome problems and create truly GREAT relationships that last a lifetime. Enroll today and get the workbook at RelateGREAT.net/strongfam Remember: RelateGREAT! Podcast listeners get 20% off with promo code: STRONG20 Listen to “The Relate GREAT! Podcast with Jonathan Sherman & Friends” at RelateGREAT.net/podcast. I know a LOT of cool people who know a LOT of cool relationship and psych stuff!

    1h 15m

  9. TRAILER

    000 The RelateGREAT! Podcast Trailer

    Visit the podcast page for more: RelateGREAT.net/podcastListen to “The Relate GREAT! Podcast with Jonathan Sherman & Friends” at RelateGREAT.net/podcast. I know a LOT of cool people who know a LOT of cool relationship and psych stuff!

    2 min

Trailer

4.9
out of 5
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About

My name is Jonathan Sherman, LMFT. I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, author, and speaker. We all want better relationships with our families, others, and ourselves. Over 30 years as a therapist, I’ve met a lot of cool people who know a lot of cool relationship and psych stuff. These fascinating friends will be my guests. Join us, and together, let’s learn from them. ▶︎▶︎▶︎ EPISODE TOPIC CATEGORIES:◀︎◀︎◀︎ ➡️ Unspecified: Some episodes may not fit a specific category and are not marked differently. ➡️ Abuse/Narci: Abuse and narcissism-related. ➡️ Addiction ➡️ Affairs: About affairs and affair recovery. ➡️ Call-In Show: I hold a live call-in show on the first Monday of every month, which is then turned into episodes for this podcast. Visit RelateGREAT.net/podcast for details and how to call in. ➡️ Communication ➡️ Divorce ➡️ Dating: How to attract the best. For singles at any age and stage in the dating scene. ➡️ Funny: Sometimes I do funny or satirical episodes, such as my Free BAD Advice column. ➡️ GR Masters: The GREAT Relationship Masters Series showcases real-life couples who share with us what has worked for them. Also, visit my GR Masters Blog for more great couples at RrelateGREAT.net/the-great-relationship-masters. ➡️ Marriage ➡️ Money ➡️ Parenting ➡️ Self-Mastery ➡️ Sex: Sex and intimacy, which while related, are not always synonymous. ➡️ Therapy: Topics about therapy, doing therapy, going into the field of therapy, or what it’s like being a therapist. ➡️ Workshop: Is for the Workshop Archive. I’ve recorded many of my workshops over the years. I’ll share some of the most requested ones here.

Information