Rachel sits down with Sandy Gerber, communication coach, emotional intelligence trainer, and best-selling author of Emotional Magnetism, winner of 24 international book awards. Years ago, Sandy looked like a success from nine to five while her personal life was falling apart, and that turning point sent her on a decade-long search for communication tools that actually work in real life. She shares her EQ Switch for calming your nervous system in the moment, the Honest Sandwich for having hard conversations without anyone getting defensive, and the four emotional magnets that explain why the people you love and lead make the choices they do. Along the way, Rachel and Sandy discover they are speaking the same language: Sandy's Aware, Express, Engage lines up beautifully with Rachel's Joy Macros™ of Notice, Allow, Share. In This EpisodeWhy most of us learn to communicate by failing at it, and the personal failure that set Sandy on her pathSandy's three stages of connected communication: Aware, Express, Engage (and how they mirror Notice, Allow, Share)The boardroom moment when a CFO cut Sandy off mid-presentation, and what she wishes she had known thenThe EQ Switch: Locate the feeling in your body, Name the emotion, and Breathe with the 7-second EQ breath (3 seconds in through the nose, 4 seconds out through the mouth)The research behind naming your emotions (affect labeling, from Dr. Matthew Lieberman at UCLA)How to build your feelings vocabulary by simply asking, "What am I feeling right now?"Rachel's perimenopause morning, and why "I can't put a word on it yet, let's take a break" is a winThe four words to never say again ("We need to talk") and what to say insteadThe Honest Sandwich: Feel, Need, ForwardWhy relationships don't just stop, they driftThe 1960s book that changed Sandy's life, and the first-date question that led to a 12-year marriageThe SAVE emotional magnets: Safety, Achievement, Value, ExperienceWhat brings Sandy joy: curiosity, her husband, her twin sister, and shifting from working to sell to working to serveGuest Sandy Gerber is a communication coach, emotional intelligence trainer, and best-selling author of Emotional Magnetism, which has won 24 international book awards. She was ranked #6 in the 2026 World Top 30 Communication Professionals by Global Gurus and named a 2025 Women of Influence Creative Innovator. Her mission is to help people have connected conversations by sharing simple, memorable emotional intelligence tools they can use right away at work and at home. She is also the host of the award-winning micro podcast Magnetic Communication, a TEDx speaker, and (by her own account) the proud winner of a limbo contest at age 14. Born in Montreal, Sandy now lives in Vancouver, where she spends her free time in a sea kayak. Website (free resources): sandygerber.comPodcast: Magnetic Communication, winner of 2026 Best Mindset and Mental Health PodcastBook: Emotional MagnetismNew book, available for pre-order: Connected Conversations at connectedconversationsbook.comMemorable Quote "That seven seconds is the gap where real leadership and connection happen." (Sandy Gerber) Tools to Try This Week The EQ Switch: Locate. Name. Breathe. The Honest Sandwich: Feel. Need. Forward. Example: "I felt frustrated when I was cut off in the meeting. I need to know my voice is valued. Going forward, can you ask for my input before we wrap up?" The SAVE Magnets: Safety, Achievement, Value, Experience. Which one drives you? Which one drives the people you love? Connect with Rachel Rachel Bents is the host of Joy Unfiltered, founder of The Joy Collective, and author of Be With: 39 Habits for a Joy-Filled Life, out now. Follow the show and share this episode with someone who could use a little more joy, or a little more connection, today. Instagram: @rachel_bentsWebsite: joycollectivehq.com This episode is proudly sponsored by RK Designs MN. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.
