Human Beings, being human

Kinsey Kappler
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Personal Journals

Human Beings, being human is a podcast that shares emotionally honest stories about growth, heartbreak, healing, and human connection. Host Kinsey invites listeners into real, vulnerable moments that remind us we’re never alone in the process of becoming ourselves.

Episodes

  1. 18h ago

    being Sober

    Send us Fan Mail Being Sober A year ago, I quit drinking. In this episode, I share the story I have never told in full. I talk about how alcohol slowly became my way of coping with loneliness, social anxiety, shame, and a lifetime of not feeling worthy. From drinking in the Navy, bartending, and getting a DWI, to relapses, rock bottom moments, and the realization that alcohol had gone from being a crutch to becoming a cage. Looking back, I don't think alcohol was ever the real problem. It was my solution to a much deeper pain. I share what sobriety has taught me about addiction, recovery, therapy, connection, and what happened when I finally stopped numbing myself long enough to meet the parts of me that had been asking to be loved all along. If you have ever wondered whether life could be different, or if you are carrying something that feels too heavy to carry alone, I hope my story reminds you that healing is possible. I would love to hear from you. What have you had to let go of in order to become more yourself? Support the show

    39 min

  2. Jun 11

    being in Relationships

    Send us Fan Mail What’s a “Relationship,” Anyway? Most people hear “relationship” and think “romance.” But I’m saying it’s way broader than that. Any time two people interact, that’s a relationship, even if they just see each other around. All the stuff like how often you hang out or what you do together just describes the kind of relationship it is. This opens the door to all sorts of connections – the usual romantic ones, polyamory, or even just casual acquaintances. The main idea is that connecting with someone creates a bond. The Stuff That Makes Relationships Work (and When They Don’t) There are three big things that make up any relationship: how much time you spend together, your shared space, and the agreements you have. Time and space are pretty obvious – it’s about when and where you connect. But the agreements? Those are huge and often get ignored. These are the ground rules you set for expectations, like if you’re exclusive, how you handle disagreements, or how you manage money together. I learned this the hard way in a past marriage; not having clear money talks upfront made the divorce way messier. It really shows how important it is to actually decide on these things, instead of just assuming society’s “relationship escalator” (dating -> marriage -> shared everything) will take care of it. Relationships Have a Life Cycle, Too We’re taught that relationships should last forever, but honestly, they all end eventually, even if it’s just because someone passes away. I think it’s more helpful to see relationships as cycles, like seasons, rather than a straight line. They naturally go through phases of coming together and sometimes pulling apart. Society is terrible at handling breakups; we usually end up cutting off all contact and making it super painful. Instead, I’m all for “conscious decoupling,” where you actually plan out how a breakup will go down to make it less awful and allow people to move on and keep growing. It’s not about how long a relationship lasts, but about how well you navigate its journey. Being Whole on Your Own It’s important to distinguish between actually changing how you relate to someone and just slapping a new label on things. Real change happens when the dynamic shifts, and then you redefine it. People and their relationships are always evolving, so you need to be flexible. The growth you get from any relationship, no matter how long it lasts, is valuable. And crucially, you need to be a whole person on your own before getting into a partnership. The idea that someone else “completes” you or is your “other half” is just not healthy. When you’re already whole, you can build healthier connections. Support the show

    24 min

  3. Jun 6

    being Free and Connected

    Send us Fan Mail Autonomy is supposed to feel like freedom, but in relationships it can quietly turn into distance, avoidance, and “I thought you were fine.” I sit down with Sky to get real about communication in relationships, especially when you care deeply about independence and you’re also trying to build something sustainable with another human being. We talk about how misattunement happens, why regular check-ins are more than a nice idea, and what it looks like to stay sovereign without starving the relationship of emotional safety. Sky shares lessons from an 18-year partnership and years of practicing non-monogamy and polyamory, including what changes when multiple long-term relationships begin competing for the same finite resources: time, space, energy, and attention. We dig into agreements vs unspoken expectations, the trap of presumed reciprocity, and why “fair” as strict equality can create shame and resentment. A more useful north star shows up again and again: equity, differentiation, and choosing what’s functional over what merely sounds principled. We also get into kitchen table polyamory, vetting new partners, and why New Relationship Energy can be one of the most powerful drugs humans experience. If you’ve ever felt swept up, defensive, or unwilling to hear feedback, this conversation offers a gentler path: build trust through structure when it helps, invite outside mirrors, and trace today’s reactions back to family-of-origin patterns so you can heal them in relationship. Subscribe for more conversations like this, share this with someone navigating partnership dynamics, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway. Support the show

    1h 15m

  4. May 27

    being in the Underworld

    Send us Fan Mail Hey everyone, it's Kinsey — and I'm back. If you've been wondering where I went, honestly? I've been in it. Deep in it. The last time I sat down to record, I was freshly out of my government job, newly sober, and trying to convince myself that jumping into the unknown was going to be okay. What I didn't know then was just how much more was still coming. So let's catch up. Over the past eight months my life has pretty much fallen apart and put itself back together again — and not in a neat, tidy way. In October, my partner of nearly four years told me she wanted to de-escalate from being primary partners. Which, on top of already not having a job or any real sense of what my future looked like, absolutely wrecked me. The thing I had been leaning on the most started to shift, and I didn't know how to handle it. What followed was a slow unraveling that took months. We went from primary partners to just partners, then from partners to friends, and then in January things completely fell apart. And January, February, and March were some of the darkest months of my life — I'm not going to sugarcoat it. I was unemployed, my savings were disappearing, the credit cards were piling up, and the person I thought was the love of my life was moving on. There were days I really didn't want to get out of bed. There were nights I couldn't sleep at all. But I also learned so much through all of it. I talk in this episode about something that completely shifted the way I see relationships — this idea that relationships move in cycles, not in a straight line. Our culture sells us this escalator model where you meet someone, move in together, get married, and stay together forever or you failed. But I don't think that's how it actually works, and I don't think that's how it has to work. I share the framework that helped me make sense of what was happening and find some peace in it. I also get into something I've been thinking about a lot, which is the difference between expectations and invitations. So much of the pain in relationships — and I mean so much of it — comes from expectations we didn't even know we had. I share some really specific examples from my own relationship, some of them small, some of them not so small, and how recognizing that difference changed things for me. And I get honest about the old wound that all of this cracked open. The feeling of being seen but not chosen. It goes all the way back to childhood for me, and watching it show up again in this relationship, and understanding why, was one of the harder and more important things I've had to sit with. By the end of March things started to turn around. A trip to Asheville to visit a friend helped a lot. Leaning on my community helped even more. I started doing what I could to bring in money — Ubering, medical studies, donating plasma — and I started actually putting myself out there as a relationship coach and professional DOM, even though it was terrifying and I had no idea what I was doing. In April I moved out of the home my partner and I had shared for two and a half years and into my own place. And honestly? Having my own space has been everything. I feel like myself again. I have more friends and more connection than I've ever had. I'm building something that actually feels like mine. There's still a lot I don't have figured out. The work stuff is still a work in progress. But I feel capable in a way I haven't in a long time. If I could get through what the last eight months threw at me, I think I can handle just about anything. If you're in the middle of a hard season right now, I hope this episode makes you feel a little less alone. You're not broken. You're not behind. You're just becoming. I'm really glad to be back. Support the show

    39 min

  5. 09/02/2025

    being in the In-Between

    Send us Fan Mail   In this episode of Human Beings, being human, I’m not sharing a story I’ve already walked through—I’m sharing the one I’m living right now. Earlier this year, I left behind a secure but soul-numbing federal job. After nearly a decade of “counting sheep and goats,” the comfort had become confinement, and I knew I couldn’t grow there anymore. So I quit—without a plan, only a leap of faith into the unknown.  What followed was messy: financial anxiety, sleepless nights, doubts about my worth, even ruptures in my relationship. But breakdowns became breakthroughs as I learned to face the fears I’d spent years avoiding. Instead of pushing them away, I began listening—discovering that on the other side of fear is often the very desire I’ve been longing for.  I share what it’s been like to sit with shadow, to give up alcohol and feel what I used to numb, and to let therapy and mirrors of connection hold me through the hardest parts. And I share the hope and clarity that’s begun to emerge—the trust that my worth isn’t something I have to prove, but something I can remember and return to.  If you’re in your own season of transition—between jobs, identities, relationships, or versions of yourself—I hope my story helps you feel less alone. You’re not broken, you’re not behind. You’re becoming.  I’d love to hear from you: What have your seasons of in-between looked like? What challenges have you faced, and what did you learn by walking through them?  Let’s keep becoming—together.  Support the show

    19 min

  6. 08/20/2025

    being Non-Monogamous

    Send us Fan Mail What does it really mean to live and love beyond traditional rules? In this episode, I sit down with my friend Sky to explore the messy, beautiful, and deeply human experience of being non-monogamous. Together we talk about what drew us into this path, the challenges and breakthroughs we’ve faced, and how non-monogamy has changed the way we see ourselves, our partners, and love itself. This isn’t a “how-to” guide. It’s a conversation about the real stuff—the fear of being vulnerable, the courage it takes to tell the truth, the joy of deep connection, and the heartbreaks that shape us along the way. Sky shares stories that are raw and relatable, while I reflect on my own journey of learning how to communicate, negotiate, and love in ways I never thought possible. At its heart, this episode is about more than just relationship structures. It’s about being human together. About what it means to feel seen, held, and heard in our relationships, and how leaning into honesty—even when it’s uncomfortable—creates space for intimacy, freedom, and belonging. If you’ve ever wondered about non-monogamy, or if you’re just curious about how people make meaning of love in their own lives, this conversation is for you. My hope is that you leave this episode not only with a window into non-monogamy, but also with permission to ask deeper questions in your own relationships—and to trust that the hard conversations can lead to more connection, not less. Come as you are. Leave a little more human. If you loved Sky and would like to work with her, you can contact her here.  https://www.erikalabuzanlopeztherapy.com/meet-sky-counseling-intern-couplestherapy-marriagecounseling-leaguecity-houston-texas Support the show

    1h 7m

  7. 08/11/2025

    being in my Relationship Journey

    Send us Fan Mail In this intimate episode, I trace my personal relationship journey—from shy teenager, to married and opening up, to embracing many loves, and finally calling in my current primary partner. It’s a story about learning what love means when you stop following default rules and start creating relationships with intention.  I share the awkwardness of my early years, when I barely spoke to the girls I liked, and the sweetness of my first love at 15—a connection that planted the seed for the kind of intimacy I’d always seek. I talk about the long stretch between then and my marriage, where I often found myself drawn to people who were unavailable in some way, and how that shaped my early understanding of love.  When I got married, I knew about non-monogamy but hadn’t practiced it. We eventually opened our relationship, and while it brought new possibilities, it also brought every insecurity and fear to the surface. That experience taught me what doesn’t work for me—and pushed me to start asking better questions about what I actually want.  Post-divorce, I dove into learning: books like More Than Two and The Ethical Slut, relationship coaching, and a lot of trial and error. In 2019, I found myself in three concurrent relationships that felt surprisingly easy and connected—none of us trying to be each other’s “everything.” I realized that variety wasn’t a lack; it was richness.  When the pandemic hit, one of those relationships deepened. I said yes to it even knowing it might end, because endings can be just as sacred as beginnings. That conscious ending made space for what I truly wanted: a primary partner.  That’s when Ziona came into my life. Introduced through mutual friends, we connected immediately. We chose to be monogamous for our first couple of years, building a foundation of trust, safety, and communication. Now, with that foundation in place, we’re expanding again—slowly, intentionally, and with joy for each other’s joy. That’s compersion: finding pleasure in your partner’s pleasure.  This episode explores:  Why I no longer believe in one person meeting all my needsHow conscious endings can be deeply healingThe importance of starting with friendship and moving at the pace of your nervous systemWhy there’s no “better” between monogamy and polyamory—only what works for those involvedThe role of intention and communication in every relationship style If you’ve ever questioned your relationship model, felt torn between tradition and curiosity, or wondered how to build something that truly fits you—this episode is for you. It’s not about choosing the “right” structure; it’s about being in relationship in a way that feels aligned, alive, and authentic.   💬 Reflection prompt: What’s your relationship style—really? And what would you choose if you set aside everything you were told was “right” or “normal”? Support the show

    26 min

  8. 07/24/2025

    being Kinsey

    Send us Fan Mail What’s in a name? For some of us, everything. In this intimate episode, Kinsey shares the deeply personal and transformative journey of becoming Kinsey—from growing up with a name that never quite fit, to a life-altering moment at an acroyoga retreat in Costa Rica that sparked a naming journey rooted in truth, identity, and embodied resonance. This isn’t just a story about gender or pronouns or even names—it’s about the ache of living misnamed, the courage it takes to claim your authentic self, and the slow, beautiful integration of becoming whole. With humor, honesty, and raw vulnerability, Kinsey recounts the layered process of moving from Paul to Myra to McKinsey and, ultimately, Kinsey—a name that clicked not just cognitively, but soul-deep. We explore what it means to be seen before we can see ourselves, how community can hold us through change, and how naming isn’t just linguistic—it’s spiritual, social, and existential. Along the way, Kinsey reflects on the influence of Alfred Kinsey and the radical idea that human experience exists on a spectrum—of gender, of sexuality, of being. Whether you’ve changed your name, thought about it, or never questioned yours, this episode invites you to reflect on identity, resonance, and the stories we carry in the words we’re called. What parts of you have waited to be named? What would it feel like to hear a name that makes your whole body say yes? Support the show

    25 min

  9. 07/14/2025

    being Genderfluid

    Send us Fan Mail In this deeply personal episode, I share the story of my gender journey—how it began years before my divorce, long before I even had the language to describe it. From a pivotal moment at a swingers convention in New Orleans, where I first met someone embodying a nonbinary expression, to the early childhood memory of being told that “boys don’t paint their nails,” this episode traces the quiet awakenings and bold experiments that brought me home to myself. I talk about what it was like to swing between masculinity and femininity, trying on names, clothes, voices, and ways of being—all in search of what felt true. At one point, I performed femininity just as I had performed masculinity, unsure where my real self ended and the performance began. But over time, with the support of chosen family, trans support groups, and my own willingness to feel the discomfort of growth, I found something even more honest than either extreme: I found the middle. The fluid, alive, ever-shifting space between. This episode explores: The difference between performing gender and expressing itEarly moments of gender suppression and their lasting impactThe emotional turbulence of trying on new identitiesHow a supportive partner and community helped me navigate unknownsThe importance of play in discovering our truthThe power of naming, and why “Myra” still lives within meHow I came to embrace being both masculine and feminine—and neither entirely.If you’ve ever questioned your gender, your identity, or the roles you were handed—this episode is for you. If you’ve ever felt like you had to choose between boxes that don’t quite fit—this is for you. And even if your journey looks different, my hope is that by sharing mine, you’ll feel a little more seen, a little more invited to be curious about your own truth. I also introduce the term “gender fluid” as the label that resonates most with me—not because it’s fixed, but because it gives me permission to flow. I share how I now express my femininity in ways that feel embodied and joyful—painted toenails, skirts, sensuality, softness—and how that expression no longer needs to prove anything. This episode is a love letter to the middle space. To the part of us that doesn’t need to explain, only express. To the people who helped me see myself more clearly, and to the younger version of me who just wanted to be free. ⚡ Mentioned in this episode: my first experiences with makeup, going by Myra, navigating family conversations, and how gender identity evolved alongside relational growth. ✨ Listen in if you’re seeking: Representation for gender exploration and nonbinary identityHope during a transition or identity shiftA mirror for your own becomingPermission to play, to try, to feel, and to not always know💬 Prompt for reflection: How do you currently express your gender? Does it feel aligned with who you are—or who you’ve been told to be? Thank you for listening to Human Beings, Being Human. May this story help you feel more at home in your body, more alive in your truth, and more connected to your own beautiful becoming. Support the show

    21 min

  10. 06/17/2025

    being Broken Open

    Send us Fan Mail Welcome to the very first episode of Human Beings Being Human. In this deeply personal opening, I share the winding path that brought me here — not just to this podcast, but to the person I am today. My story begins with an ending: the collapse of my marriage in 2016, and the profound disorientation that followed. I talk candidly about the heartbreak, the identity loss, and the painful realization that I didn't really know who I was outside of that relationship. From there, I share how working with a relationship coach became my first real step toward learning that relating — to others and to myself — is a skill, one that can be practiced, refined, and transformed. I take you through the communities that became my teachers and mirrors — AcroYoga, Tantra, ISTA, and the burn community — each one challenging and expanding my understanding of intimacy, communication, embodiment, and connection. You'll hear how seemingly simple practices like learning to communicate in partner acrobatics opened the door to deeper healing, and how being introduced to alternative communities offered me experiences of radical authenticity, vulnerability, and freedom. This episode also plants seeds for future conversations: how I came to adopt the name Kinsey, how I stepped into non-monogamy, how I discovered sacred sexuality and healing facilitation, and how I ultimately found deep partnership. I reflect on the cycles of light and shadow that have shaped my journey — from the dark depression of 2020 to the transformative growth of 2021 and beyond. At its heart, this podcast isn’t about offering advice or giving you a roadmap to follow. It’s about sharing my honest, unfolding story in hopes that it might encourage you to explore your own — to ask better questions, sit in discomfort, and honor the beautiful, messy process of being human. Thank you for being here at the very beginning. Support the show

    25 min
  • 10 Episodes

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

Human Beings, being human is a podcast that shares emotionally honest stories about growth, heartbreak, healing, and human connection. Host Kinsey invites listeners into real, vulnerable moments that remind us we’re never alone in the process of becoming ourselves.

Information

  • Creator
    Kinsey Kappler
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    10
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Human Beings, being human
  • Show Website
    Human Beings, being human