The crisis is years behind you and the marriage works, and there's still a list of subjects neither of you brings up. Learn why Ephesians 4:32 speaks to a couple who assumed the healing ended long ago. Some couples went through a crisis, or a string of them, and they made the decision to stay married. That was the right call, and they have lived with it for years now. And the deeper wounds from what happened never fully closed. You still avoid certain subjects, and both of you know which ones they are. The marriage functions, and something in it feels haunted. Here's the part I want to get at. Most couples in this position have quit expecting anything else. You're not in a crisis, and nobody is threatening to leave. You made your peace with a ceiling, and you assume what you have now is the finished product. As far as you can tell, the healing stopped years ago, and you filed the rest under this is just how we are. This episode opens with a picture of a husband and wife married a long time. A few years back something happened between them, a betrayal, and it nearly ended everything. They talked it through and decided to stay together, and they did. They pay the bills and raise the kids, and most nights they eat across the table from each other. But there's a list of subjects neither of them brings up. From the outside the marriage looks healed. Inside, it feels like a house divided. Ephesians 4:32 speaks into that: "Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." Look at who Paul was writing to. The verse right before this one lists off bitterness and rage, which tells you plenty about that church. These were people with reasons to be less than kind to each other, and he tells them to be kind anyway. Kindness is the material you rebuild with after trust has cracked, and it stays available when the big conversations are closed off. Then look at the standard Paul attaches. Just as God through Christ has forgiven you. That's the measure, and it's also the supply. And here's the push. God has not signed off on the ceiling you've accepted. He is patient with a marriage that stayed, and patient means He is still working on it. Bart shares his own version of this, the couples he has counseled in exactly this spot and what he has had to admit about what he can see from the pulpit. BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU'LL DISCOVER: Why kindness is the material that rebuilds a marriage after trust cracks What Paul attaches to the command, and why it changes where the supply comes from One small thing to do for your spouse today, with no conversation attached There is no single dramatic scene that fixes a marriage like this. What heals takes small acts over time. He is patient with a marriage that lasts, and He is not finished with it yet. Share This Episode: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/336 Need Prayer? Leave me a voicemail: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/voicemail Want to keep these devotions coming? Please consider supporting this podcast. https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/support/ Rate and Review https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/reviews/new/ Connect with Bart Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/dailydevotionsforbusylives Website: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com Feeling spiritually drained? Start here. Download your free copy of my eBook Making Time for Jesus here: https://www.dailydevotionsforbusylives.com/subscribe.