The Lafaya Way Podcast

Lafaya Mitchell - The Lafaya Way
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  • Philosophy
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A mix of poker wisdom and life mastery Life isn’t about the hand you’re dealt - it’s about how you play it. Welcome to The Lafaya Way: Mastering the Mental Game of Life, the podcast for women who refuse to fold in the face of adversity. Whether you’re navigating personal challenges, professional obstacles, or high-stakes decisions, this show is your reminder that you have the power to play to win.

  1. Apr 6

    From Cushing's Disease to Crossing Oceans - with Kiko Matthews

    I’ll be honest… this episode didn’t go as planned—and that’s exactly why you need to listen. We hit record, and life showed up in real time. Kiko was there, her beautiful daughter Ocean popped in, bedtime didn’t quite happen… and suddenly, we were living the very message we were about to talk about: you don’t control life—you learn how to move with it. And then Kiko started sharing. About surviving a rare disease—three times.About rowing solo across the Atlantic… six months after brain surgery.About choosing purpose over pain.About something she calls Kikonomics—a way of managing your energy so life doesn’t drain you dry. And somewhere in between the laughter, the chaos, and the raw truth… something clicked. Because this wasn’t just a conversation.This was a masterclass in how to play your hand—no matter what you’ve been dealt. Key Takeaways You can’t control most of life—but you can control your responseThe moment you stop trying to control the uncontrollable, you free up energy for what actually matters.Energy is your most valuable currencyWorry drains it. Perspective protects it. And without it, even your best resources are useless.Mental fitness is trainableJust like your body, your mind can be strengthened. Positivity isn’t luck—it’s practice.Every experience has two sidesThe skill isn’t avoiding pain—it’s learning to reframe it and extract growth from it.Storms don’t last—but they do shape youEvery challenge builds resilience… if you allow it to.Stop trying to escape discomfort—grow through itThe very thing you’re resisting might be the thing that transforms you. Favourite Quote "If you can’t control it, why waste your energy worrying about it? Save that energy for getting through it." 00:00 Welcome and Introductions 00:26 Kids on the Podcast 01:52 Meet Kiko’s Journey 02:50 Cushing’s and Radiotherapy 03:23 Atlantic Row Record 03:50 Living and Giving Mission 04:44 Adventures and Community Impact 06:31 Single Mom and New Book 08:09 Practicing Positivity 09:50 Conserving Energy Mindset 12:07 Perspective from Colin’s Story 14:56 Control What You Can 17:12 Mental Fitness Blueprint 18:32 Host Recap and Takeaways 22:00 Reframing Past Hardships 23:13 Storms Pass Build Resilience 25:31 Why Humans Need Challenges 27:23 Feel Emotions Then Reframe 30:12 Train Logic Save Energy 31:41 Book Progress And Purpose 33:44 Encouragement For Creators 35:19 Gratitude And Closing Thoughts 39:22 Final Sendoff And Takeaway Find out more and connect with Kiko Kiko Matthews is an adventurer, scientist, speaker, and author whose life is a powerful example of resilience in action. From surviving Cushing’s disease to rowing the Atlantic solo and leading environmental expeditions, she has built a life rooted in purpose, sustainability, and deep human connection. She’s now developing her concept of Kikonomics—a practical approach to mental fitness that helps people manage their energy, reframe challenges, and live more intentionally. Kiko’s work blends science, storytelling, and humour to explore leadership, adversity, and what it really means to live well. Website: www.kikomatthews.co.ukSocial: Kiko MatthewsSpecial: Reach out via email for coaching opportunities, speaking engagements, or to connect around her upcoming book (and maybe even receive a signed copy 👀)If this episode spoke to you, don’t keep it to yourself. Share it with someone who needs the reminder that they’re stronger than they think—and that this moment, right now, is just part of the game. And remember… Life isn’t about the hand you’re dealt.It’s about how you play it. If you're interested in learning more about playing the hand your dealt in this mental game of life, you'll love my book Poker A Woman's Game. To download your free chapter today, visit https://lafayawaypoker.com

    From Cushing's Disease to Crossing Oceans - with Kiko Matthews

  2. Mar 19

    When One of Us Falls: A Call to Support Dan McGee - with Matt Francis

    This episode wasn’t planned the way most are. Yes, Matt and I talked about poker.Yes, we talked about staying calm under pressure. But underneath it all… something else was happening. This became about a moment in real life where someone we know—someone who has quietly shown up for others for years—is now facing a hand he cannot play alone. And this time… it’s our turn to show up. Key takeaways: Sometimes life doesn’t test your strategy—it tests your humanity. The strongest people are often the ones least likely to ask for help. Community isn’t built in the easy moments—it’s revealed in the hard ones. You don’t have to do something big to make a difference—small actions add up fast. Playing the hand you’re dealt sometimes means letting others support you. My Favorite Quote: “People don’t think about how much a small amount counts, but it really does. It adds up real quickly.” Why This Episode Matters (Dan’s Story)On February 27, 2026, Dan McGee was in a serious motorcycle accident near Sacramento. He suffered a fractured skull and multiple broken bones.He’s already undergone emergency, life-saving surgeries. And while he’s incredibly strong… The road ahead is long. He’s currently unable to walk, unable to work, and facing weeks—if not months—of recovery. Why We’re Sharing This Matt has known Dan for over 16 years. And if there’s one thing he made clear in this conversation, it’s this: Dan is the guy who shows up. The one who gives.The one who takes care of others.The one who doesn’t ask for help. In fact, Dan stepped away from his own business for years to become a full-time caregiver for his aunt during her battle with Alzheimer’s—using his time, energy, and savings to make sure she was safe and cared for. Now… He’s the one who needs support. And asking doesn’t come naturally to him. So we’re asking for him. What Your Support Helps With Because Dan was rebuilding his life when the accident happened—and doesn’t have a financial cushion—this fundraiser is about covering the essentials while he heals: Rent, utilities, and groceries Medical and rehabilitation needs Home adjustments for accessibility Transportation to medical appointments This isn’t about extras. It’s about giving him the space to recover without the added weight of financial stress. How You Can HelpIf this touches you, here are two simple ways to make a real difference: 👉 Donate (even a small amount helps):https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-dan-mcgees-recovery-journey/cl/s 👉 Share the link:Dan doesn’t have a big network. That’s why this matters. The more people who see this, the more support we can create around him. Dan spent years making sure someone else didn’t have to face their hardest days alone. Let’s make sure he doesn’t have to either. If you're interested in learning more about playing the hand you're dealt in this mental game of life, you'll love my book Poker: A Woman's Game. To download your free chapter today, visit:https://lafayawaypoker.com

    When One of Us Falls: A Call to Support Dan McGee - with Matt Francis

  3. Mar 6

    Wrongfully Accused: The Story That Became a Memoir, a Mission, and a Movement

    Some stories sound too unbelievable to be real. Imagine this: you’re a respected immigration lawyer… living the life you worked incredibly hard to build. Then one day, at LAX airport, a dozen armed federal agents arrest you for a crime you didn’t commit. That’s exactly what happened to Kelly Giles. What followed wasn’t just a legal battle—it was a journey through prison, trauma, identity, and ultimately deep healing. Through poetry, storytelling, and raw honesty, Kelly began unraveling a lifetime of buried pain—from adoption and abandonment to betrayal and injustice. And somewhere along the way, something powerful happened. The very experiences that could have broken him became the foundation for helping others heal. In this conversation, we explore how Kelly learned to play the hand life dealt him—even when the cards looked impossible. From federal prison to poetry workshops, foster youth advocacy, and a memoir now being adapted for film, Kelly’s story reminds us that even our darkest chapters can lead to unexpected purpose.  Key Takeaways Pain can become purpose. Kelly began writing poetry simply to survive emotionally. What started as “therapy on paper” eventually became published work that now helps others process their own trauma.  The stories we tell ourselves shape our lives. For years, Kelly operated from unconscious survival identities formed in childhood. Through reflection and writing, he began to understand—and rewrite—those narratives.  Sometimes the breaking point becomes the turning point. His arrest and prison sentence forced Kelly to confront buried trauma and reassess everything he believed about himself and the world.  Healing rarely happens alone. Throughout his journey, Kelly encountered “angels”—people who supported him when he couldn’t support himself. From a lawyer who believed in his innocence to a therapist who walked with him for years.  Your story may heal people you’ll never meet. Kelly once received a message from a doctor in Brazil who reads his poetry to patients facing serious illness. Proof that sharing your truth can ripple far beyond your expectations.  Favourite Quote“Until you learn how to love and forgive yourself, you’re already in hell.” Find Out More & Connect with Kelly GilesKelly Giles is a former U.S. immigration attorney turned author, poet, and advocate. After a life-altering wrongful conviction connected to a colleague’s fraud case, Kelly spent 10 months in federal prison—an experience that became the heart of his powerful memoir Killing Justice. Through writing, poetry, and storytelling, Kelly explores themes of trauma, identity, justice, and healing. Today he volunteers with foster youth, participates in poetry and hip-hop workshops supporting creative expression, and continues to use his voice to raise awareness about mental health and the criminal justice system. His memoir Killing Justice is the first in a planned trilogy and is currently being adapted for film. Website  http://www.kellygiles.com Author & Poetry Website  http://www.kgstoryteller.com/ Social Media Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kellyab303/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100077323377913 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kelly-giles-0260269/ X: https://x.com/kellyab33 Books Killing Justice https://books2read.com/killingjustice Poetry Collection https://www.lulu.com/spotlight/kellyab3/ If you're interested in learning more about playing the hand you're dealt in this mental game of life, you'll love my book Poker: A Woman's Game. To download your free chapter today, visit:  https://lafayawaypoker.com

    Wrongfully Accused: The Story That Became a Memoir, a Mission, and a Movement

  4. Feb 19

    The Peace You’re Seeking Is the Peace You Bring with Andrea L. Wehlann

    There are some conversations that stay with you long after the microphones are turned off. This was one of them. When Andrea L. Wehlann sat down with me, she didn’t just share her résumé as a bestselling author, award-winning poet, Reiki Master, and yogi. She shared the parts of her story that most people would never dare to say out loud. Sexual assault. Multiple miscarriages. The loss of a child. And yet… what stood out most wasn’t the darkness. It was her unwavering peace. Andrea said something that stopped me in my tracks: “The only peace you’ll find at the top of the mountaintop is the peace you bring there.” And that right there? That’s The Lafaya Way. Because life isn’t about escaping the storm.It’s about mastering yourself in the storm. Andrea’s journey is a masterclass in alchemy — taking unimaginable pain and transmuting it into clarity, love, and purpose. In this episode, we talk about how to stop playing the victim of your story and start rewriting it. And trust me — you’re going to want to lean in for this one. Key Takeways Pain can become power — but only if you choose to use it.Your experiences aren’t happening to you. They can be happening for you. Your mind is not always telling the truth.Andrea teaches that the mind speaks loudest and first — but it’s not always aligned with love. You can retrain it. It’s either love or fear.Every decision. Every reaction. Every story you tell yourself. Love or fear. Feel your feelings — don’t suppress them.Sad? Be sad. Angry? Be angry. Emotions are information. They’re your compass, not your enemy. Writing is a powerful healing tool.When you put your pain on paper, you create space in your mind for compassion, clarity, and peace. You are not what happened to you.You are who you choose to become because of it. Forgiveness is freedom.When you understand we’re all interconnected, forgiveness becomes less about excusing behavior and more about reclaiming your peace. Favorite Quote “The mindset creates the story of ‘I’m a victim’ — but it’s the same mind that can create a love story out of anything that’s ever happened to you.” Mic. Drop. That’s the mental game right there. About Andrea Andrea L. Wehlann is a bestselling spiritual non-fiction author, award-winning poet, Reiki Master, and yogi based in Ontario, Canada. Through her books and transformational coaching, she helps women turn profound adversity into inner peace and purpose. Her books include: No Matter How Dark the Stain – A poetry collection for women navigating pain Deeper Days – A daily practice for calm amidst chaos Stillness in the Storm – A guided yoga and spiritual healing journal She also offers a Transformational Coaching Call, a 60-minute deep dive designed to uncover what’s holding you back and create a personalized roadmap for healing.  Special Offer for The Lafaya Way listeners:Get 25% off a Transformational Coaching Call using code PODCAST25 at checkout here https://ganga-moon-yoga.square.site/ -> Book Now  Website: https://ganga-moon-yoga.square.site/ Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/andrealwehlann LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrea-l-wehlann-a6b03b187/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andrea_l_wehlann/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/andrea.l.wehlann/ X: https://x.com/Gangamoonyoga Eventbrite: https://www.eventbrite.com/o/andrea-lynn-wehlann-14668342646 Life isn’t about the hand you’re dealt — it’s about how you play it.  ... If you’re interested in learning more about playing the hand you’re dealt in this mental game of life, you’ll love my book Poker: A Woman’s Game. To download your free chapter today, visit https://lafayawaypoker.com​

    The Peace You’re Seeking Is the Peace You Bring with Andrea L. Wehlann

  5. Feb 5

    Still Priceless - Loving People with Dementia When Words Fade with Rev Ben Boland

    There are conversations that gently rearrange how you see the world. This was one of them. I sat down with Rev Ben Boland—chaplain, pastor, and author—and within minutes, we were naming something many of us feel but rarely say out loud: older people don’t stop being priceless just because the world starts treating them as invisible. Ben has spent over 15 years walking alongside older people and those living with dementia. And this isn’t theory for him—it’s deeply personal. From visiting his great-grandmother as a child… to later accompanying his own father through dementia… Ben brings wisdom that’s tender, practical, and quietly confronting. If you’ve ever wondered: What do I say when someone no longer remembers me? Does dementia erase faith, identity, or worth? How do we show love when conversation isn’t easy anymore? This episode will meet you right there. 💡 Key takeaways from this episode Presence is love in action. You don’t need perfect words—showing up consistently matters more than saying the “right” thing. Dementia doesn’t erase personhood. Memory loss is not loss of value. Meet people at their strengths. Music, photos, touch, shared rituals, and sensory connection often speak louder than words. Faith isn’t fragile. Dementia may change how faith is expressed—but not its depth or meaning. Short, frequent connection beats rare, long visits. Familiar faces and voices ground people more than grand gestures. ❤️ Favourite quote from the conversation“If we visit babies who don’t know our names, why would we stop visiting people with dementia?” Let that one sink in. 📘 Find out more & connect with Rev Ben Boland Rev Ben Boland MDiv, Grad Dip (Ageing and Pastoral), has served as an older persons chaplain for over 15 years. He is deeply passionate about equipping Christians—and communities more broadly—to share love, dignity, and presence with older people and those living with dementia. His latest book, Priceless People (published by Christian Focus Publications), weaves theological depth with practical pastoral guidance for anyone navigating the often-scary terrain of ageing, care, and cognitive decline. 🔗 Connect with Ben on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rev-ben-boland-b4572a108/ And if you want to go further, you can download a free chapter of my book Poker: A Woman’s Game and keep learning how to play your hand with courage and clarity: 👉 https://lafayawaypoker.com

    Still Priceless - Loving People with Dementia When Words Fade with Rev Ben Boland

  6. Jan 22

    Jenny Leigh Hodgins - The Art of Setting Boundaries: A Journey from Burnout to Balance

    There are conversations that inform…and then there are conversations that slow you down, soften you, and quietly change how you move through your day. This episode was one of those. Jenny came into the studio carrying decades of creative wisdom, lived experience, and deep compassion — not just as an artist and coach, but as a caregiver, a boundary-setter-in-progress, and a woman who has learned (the hard way) that burnout isn’t a failure… it’s a message. If you’ve ever felt guilty for resting, torn between caring for others and caring for yourself, or quietly exhausted from always being the strong one — this conversation will feel like someone finally put words to what you’ve been living. This episode isn’t about fixing yourself.It’s about learning to stay in your lane, honor your capacity, and let stillness work for you — not against you.  Key takeaways from this episode  Burnout doesn’t come from caring — it comes from overextendingJenny explains how chronic over-giving quietly drains creative energy and trust in yourself. Boundaries are a practice, not a personality traitIf boundaries feel uncomfortable, you’re not doing them wrong — you’re building a muscle. Stillness is not “doing nothing”Rest, pauses, and quiet moments are active practices that restore clarity and creativity. Staying in your lane helps everyoneWhen you stop rescuing, others are invited to grow — and resentment loses its grip. Responding instead of reacting changes everythingSpace creates wisdom. Pausing before answering protects relationships and your nervous system. Favorite quote from the episode  “If you’re free of obstacles, you’re probably not alive. The work isn’t avoiding challenges — it’s creating value from the hand you’ve been dealt.” Find out more and connect with our guest Jenny Leigh Hodgins is a musician, composer, author, poet, podcaster ( Your Creative Chord), and creative empowerment coach with 39 years of SGI Buddhist practice. She supports creatives and caregivers who are navigating burnout, creative blocks, overwhelm, and boundary challenges — helping them reconnect to sustainable energy, creative flow, and inspired living. Jenny brings a rare blend of artistic depth, spiritual grounding, and real-life caregiving wisdom to her work — and this conversation is a beautiful reflection of that. Connect with Jenny:  Website: https://www.YourCreativeChord.com  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/YourCreativeChord  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourcreativechord  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenny-leigh-hodgins Free resources from Jenny:  Burnout RESET Guide — practical, reflective tools to restore your energy https://www.YourCreativeChord.com/burnoutguide https://www.yourcreativechord.com/getinspiredhere Life isn’t about the hand you’re dealt — it’s about how you play it. If this episode spoke to you, take a moment to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who might need permission to slow down today. And if you want to go deeper into mastering the mental game of life, you’re invited to download a free chapter of my book Poker: A Woman’s Game and explore how strategy, boundaries, and intuition intersect. Let’s play to win — your way.

    Jenny Leigh Hodgins - The Art of Setting Boundaries: A Journey from Burnout to Balance

  7. Jan 7

    Dr. Ava Eagle Brown - Free-Falling into Faith: What Happens When You Stop Worrying and Start Trusting

    Some conversations stay with you long after the recording stops. This was one of those. When I sat down with Dr. Ava Eagle Brown, I knew we’d talk about resilience. What I didn’t expect was how deeply her story would mirror something so many of us quietly carry: the tension between worry and trust… fear and faith… pressure and praise. Dr. Ava doesn’t share a polished, picture-perfect success story. She shares the real one. The kind shaped by loss, single motherhood, uncertainty, and moments where the only option left was to keep going — even without answers. What unfolded was a powerful “pain-to-power” conversation about trusting the process, catching ourselves before we spill our stress onto others, and learning how to play the hand we’re dealt with courage, compassion, and grace. This episode is a gentle reminder that you don’t have to have it all figured out — you just have to stay in the game. Key Takeaways from This Episode Why worry doesn’t solve problems — it steals peace How praise and gratitude can become anchors during overwhelming moments The power of pausing before reacting — especially with the people we love most What it really means to “play the hand you’re dealt” in life Why reflecting on how far you’ve come can completely shift your perspective How faith, storytelling, and service can turn adversity into impact Favourite Quote from the Episode“Sometimes we’re so busy worrying about how things will work out that we forget God already went ahead and made provision.” Find Out More & Connect with Dr. Ava Eagle BrownDr. Ava Eagle Brown is a multi-award-winning author, international speaker, and cultural changemaker. A proud Jamaican, she has transformed personal adversity into global impact through storytelling, publishing, and film. She is the author of the bestselling memoir The Mango Girl, founder of Book2Biz Publishing, and creator of the Black River Film Festival, elevating rural Jamaican voices onto international stages. Her work bridges faith, resilience, creativity, and community development — empowering others to rise, rebuild, and live out loud.  Website: https://www.avaeaglebrown.com/about/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wwwavbrownorg/  Free Book Consultation (Lead Magnet):https://calendly.com/dravaeaglebrown/new-meeting If you have a story inside you — or a book you want to turn into impact — this is a conversation you don’t want to miss. And if you want to go even deeper into mastering the mental game of life, you’ll love my book Poker: A Woman’s Game. Download your free chapter here: https://lafayawaypoker.com Until next time —Play the hand you’re dealt. Worry less. Praise more.

    Dr. Ava Eagle Brown - Free-Falling into Faith: What Happens When You Stop Worrying and Start Trusting

  8. 12/10/2025

    Dori Staehle - A Christian Drum Chick & The Rhythm of Stress Relief - (Not Just) For Neurodivergent Kids And Adults

    Every now and then, someone walks into the room with a story so unexpected, so wildly improbable, that it stops you mid-breath. That’s what happened when I sat down with Dori Staehle. Imagine this: you survive a freak accident that nearly ends your life… doctors can't figure out what’s wrong… pain becomes your constant companion… and everything you’ve built suddenly slips out from under you. Most would fold their hand right there. But Dori?She reached up instead of giving up.And what she heard in that moment of surrender changed everything. “Use your drums.” Two weeks later—yes, two weeks—she was healed. And the path she took from that moment forward is nothing short of astonishing. From auditioning for a church band at 47 with no lessons and no drums at home, to teaching herself drum set at 59, to running her fourth business, to becoming the only certified drum therapist in North Carolina… Dori embodies the truth she now shares with the world: You’re never too old.It’s never too late.And you absolutely can rock what you’ve got. This conversation will make you rethink healing, rethink purpose, and maybe even rethink the sound of your own heartbeat. Key Takeaways Your lowest point can become your turning point—if you’re willing to ask the right question: “Now what?” Drumming is more than rhythm—it’s science. It syncs the brain hemispheres, boosts focus, lowers stress, and ignites breakthroughs fast. Purpose often hides inside the things we loved as children. Dori was tapping rhythms long before she knew why they mattered. Labels don't define potential. Her work with ADHD and autism shows how rhythm can unlock confidence, communication, and calm. Healing doesn’t always come from where you expect it. Sometimes it comes from a beat, a prayer, a moment of surrender. You’re always one “next stage” away from a completely different life. Favourite Quote “When you get knocked down, you have a choice. You can give up… or you can reach up, rise up, and rock the next stage of your life.” — Dori Staehle Find Out More & Connect with Dori Staehle BioA freak accident in 2011 triggered a rare disease and pushed Dori Staehle into the darkest chapter of her life. When nothing worked—not therapy, not medicine, not time—she asked God for a way to heal herself and others. The answer was clear: use your drums. Within two weeks, she was healed. Now in her 50s and onto her fourth business, Dori runs Next Stage Drumming, where she blends drum therapy, mentoring, and mindset work to help people break through stress, anxiety, ADHD symptoms, trauma, and more. She’s a certified drum therapist, author of two uplifting books, and the founder of a powerful drum ministry. She’s living proof that purpose can hit you like a lightning bolt… or a drumbeat. Website: https://www.nextstagedrumming.comLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/doristaehlembaFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/nextstagedrummingInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/nextstagedoriYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@NextStageDrumming Free Resource: 10 Easy Ways to Beat Stress — sign up on her website. As always ... If you're interested in learning more about playing the hand you’re dealt in this mental game of life, you'll love my book Poker: A Woman's Game.Download your free chapter at https://lafayawaypoker.com

    Dori Staehle - A Christian Drum Chick & The Rhythm of Stress Relief - (Not Just) For Neurodivergent Kids And Adults
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About

A mix of poker wisdom and life mastery Life isn’t about the hand you’re dealt - it’s about how you play it. Welcome to The Lafaya Way: Mastering the Mental Game of Life, the podcast for women who refuse to fold in the face of adversity. Whether you’re navigating personal challenges, professional obstacles, or high-stakes decisions, this show is your reminder that you have the power to play to win.

Information

  • Creator
    Lafaya Mitchell - The Lafaya Way
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    25
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Lafaya Mitchell - The Lafaya Way
  • Show Website
    The Lafaya Way Podcast