Mothers, Lies and DNA Surprises

Stacy Porter

Welcome, I’m Stacy, the host of Mothers, Lies & DNA Surprises podcast, where we will discuss our relationships with our mothers including how they were growing up, leading up to our discovery, during our discovery and since learning our truths. We will have unfiltered conversations about our struggles with our mothers and dive into how we’ve uncovered who we are after her lies! Thank you for being here, you are not alone! I am an NPE, actually a double NPE, which means Not Parent Expected or Non Paternity Event.  I found out that the man listed on my birth certificate isn’t my biological father, twice.  For many of us we learn through at home DNA tests, others hear rumors of family secrets and confirm through a DNA test.   Within the community of DNA Surprises there are thousands of NPEs, Late Discovery Adoptees (LDAs) and Donor Conceived People (DCPs) learning their truths.  The ongoing thing I hear is how many of us had struggles with our mothers most of our lives, while others had struggles since discovery.  For a number of people learning our truths answered so many questions and for others it opened up so many wounds, unanswered questions or left them feeling so alone.  After finding the large community of others who have gone through this the common struggle I hear from so many is the relationship with our mothers.   I wanted to create a space where we can share the struggles we have with our mothers, helping others to know they are not alone and supporting each other. For some this is the first time they are sharing their stories and for others we’ve shared our stories but now are ready to discuss the relationships with our mothers more in depth. Thank you for joining us and for supporting this community!

  1. Oct 20

    Alexis's Story

    Send us Fan Mail Hello, I’m Stacy, the host of Mothers, Lies and DNA Surprises Podcast. Thank you for being here.    Today I am sharing Alexis’s story, and if you don’t know Alexis you’ve been missing out on an amazing podcast, the DNA Surprises with Alexis Hourselt podcast. Alexis shares with us not only her DNA surprise but also about her ethnic shift and how that journey has been for her.  We also discuss how she went from feeling like her and her Mother were best friends leading up to her discovery and how their relationship changed; both during the discovery as well as what it looks like currently.  I say this as well as hearing this often from others, so many of us really do feel compassion or empathy for our younger mothers, who found themselves single and pregnant but struggle with the ongoing decisions to withhold our truths at the cost of their children. Alexis also discusses how her growth and work on herself has changed who she is as well as all the relationships around her. She also reminds us that these stories are sometimes bigger than our mothers, that often times, more than just our mothers made bad choices, and reducing the shame and stigma around that may help reduce some of these surprises. Thank you Alexis for sharing your story with us! To connect with Alexis you can email her at alexis@dnasurprises.com, on her website which is dnasurprises.com, Instagram or Facebook. To hear Alexis tell her DNA surprise story you can the find her story on the following wonderful podcasts: Everything’s Relative with Eve Sturgis - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fast-friends-special-crossover-episode-with-alexis/id1459167540?i=1000569239610 NPE Stories with Lily Wood - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/alexiss-story/id1464478802?i=1000632392618 Luke, Who is Your Father - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/s2-e3-alexis-hourselt-everyone-knew/id1678312865?i=1000627452119 To listen and follow Alexis’s podcast you can find her on your favorite Podcast platform at DNA Surprises with Alexis Hourselt. Music is "Drown in your Lies" by NoxAwake via Pixabay

  2. Sep 22

    Cookie's Story

    Send us Fan Mail Hello, I’m Stacy, the host of Mothers, Lies and DNA Surprises Podcast. Thank you for being here.   Today I launch the first episode of my second season and before I introduce today’s episode I want to thank everyone for an amazing 1st season, this is a passion project that I feel very lucky to have had so many amazing people trust me with sharing their stories!  I have gained so much from each one of their stories and I will continue to share as long as there are people who want to share!  So THANK YOU to each and every one of my guests and listeners!! Today I am sharing Cookie’s story for the first time publicly.   Imagine hearing your mother, who has dementia, telling you that your Dad isn’t your Dad.  This caused Cookie to start asking questions.  And then you find out your Mother told your youngest sister years ago, who then shared the information with 2 of your grown children and they all kept it from you.      Being raised in a “perfect Christian upbringing” all looked perfect from the outside looking in. She learned from a very early age how to put on an act for others which continues to this day with her Mother. Cookie shares what this journey has felt like and wants others to know that they are not alone and to look for the little gems and hidden blessings along the way. Thank you Cookie for sharing your story with us! To connect with Cookie you can email her at cookiekidrich@gmail.com.     Music is "Drown in your Lies" by NoxAwake via Pixabay

  3. Jul 14

    Myndi's Story

    Send us Fan Mail Before I begin I would like to share a content warning, this episode includes discussions about childhood sexual abuse which could be disturbing for some audiences.   Myndi shares with us how she found out the “family secret” from her maternal cousin and then eventually how she became obsessed with finding out the answers to her DNA results, as so many of us do. When Myndi breaks her no contact with her mother to try and get answers her mother’s immediate response is so telling! Myndi’s Birth Certificate Father told her that her mother didn’t know, yet Myndi reminds him how she found out, denial runs deep for some affected by a DNA surprise, including Myndi’s BCF. Myndi shares her first conversation with her Mother and how her story didn’t make sense or add up plus her biological Father’s version of the story. As children we only have the stories as they are told to us, and when we learn our truths we try to fit the pieces together, to try and understand our correct origin story.  Myndi talks about how we deserve better, follow your heart, surround ourselves with people who support and love us, not judge us! Put yourself first! Thank you Myndi for being vulnerable, open and honest with some very personal things! Podcasts Myndi has shared her story on: NPE Stories: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/myndis-story/id1464478802?i=1000506567252 The Secret in my DNA: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-5-in-the-dark-myndis-story/id1545020186?i=1000535031685 Hiraeth Hope and Healing Retreats: https://www.hiraethhopeandhealing.com/retreats You can connect with Myndi in either of the following ways: Facebook – Myndi Morrison Fitzgerald Email – the7fitzs@yahoo.com Phone – email me at mothersliesanddnasurprises@gmail.com and I will share it with you   Music is "Drown in your Lies" by NoxAwake via Pixabay

  4. Jun 16

    Lori's Story

    Send us Fan Mail Hello, I’m Stacy, the host of Mothers, Lies and DNA Surprises Podcast. Thank you for being here.   I would like to share a possible trigger warning, Lori will talk about childhood abuse and briefly mentions suicidal thoughts. If you or anyone you know is struggling please reach out to 988 via text or phone for help! Today I am honored to share Lori’s story, as a Late Discovery Donor Conceived Person, she will share how, from a very early age she was looking for that genetic mirroring, recognizing that she didn’t look like anyone in her family, even asking if she was adopted.  Children don’t realize what is missing necessarily, however we do notice and pick up on differences very early on.  When Lori suggested to her parents that maybe her Dad was adopted, they both went along with that….versus using that opportunity to be honest, share the truth before finding out from strangers. They had so many opportunities to tell the truth yet they refused to.  As a child Lori learned to be invisible, her mother wasn’t loving or affectionate.  Lori felt that her mother wanted to have children but didn’t want to be a “mom”. She never received what she needed. Lori is very open about her tough childhood and the relationships she has with her parents as well as her brother.  She also share the positives she has found in this discovery! Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story Lori! Hiraeth Hope & Healing retreats: https://www.hiraethhopeandhealing.com/retreats Here are the links to hear Lori’s other podcast interviews: The Inconceivably Connect Podcast:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-6-the-power-of-denial-and-dna/id1813869123?i=1000713065302 NPE Stories with Lily Wood: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/loris-story/id1464478802?i=1000726533855  Everything’s Relative with Eve Sturgis: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lori-biology-101-brown-eyes-and-big-feet/id1459167540?i=1000439769354 If you would like to connect with Lori’s personally you can find her on Instagram at @ journe2me or on Facebook @Lori Tirado. Her professional pages are :  Instagram @longislandtastees or Facebook @longislandtastees. Lori’s “Hugs” that she shares at retreats for everyone to keep with them! Music is "Drown in your Lies" by NoxAwake via Pixabay

    Lori's Story

Ratings & Reviews

4.8
out of 5
12 Ratings

About

Welcome, I’m Stacy, the host of Mothers, Lies & DNA Surprises podcast, where we will discuss our relationships with our mothers including how they were growing up, leading up to our discovery, during our discovery and since learning our truths. We will have unfiltered conversations about our struggles with our mothers and dive into how we’ve uncovered who we are after her lies! Thank you for being here, you are not alone! I am an NPE, actually a double NPE, which means Not Parent Expected or Non Paternity Event.  I found out that the man listed on my birth certificate isn’t my biological father, twice.  For many of us we learn through at home DNA tests, others hear rumors of family secrets and confirm through a DNA test.   Within the community of DNA Surprises there are thousands of NPEs, Late Discovery Adoptees (LDAs) and Donor Conceived People (DCPs) learning their truths.  The ongoing thing I hear is how many of us had struggles with our mothers most of our lives, while others had struggles since discovery.  For a number of people learning our truths answered so many questions and for others it opened up so many wounds, unanswered questions or left them feeling so alone.  After finding the large community of others who have gone through this the common struggle I hear from so many is the relationship with our mothers.   I wanted to create a space where we can share the struggles we have with our mothers, helping others to know they are not alone and supporting each other. For some this is the first time they are sharing their stories and for others we’ve shared our stories but now are ready to discuss the relationships with our mothers more in depth. Thank you for joining us and for supporting this community!

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