Love & Life, Sorted

Dr. Sandy To
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A Cambridge PhD sociologist's intimate, no-BS talk about love, family and everything in between.  Join Dr. Sandy To, marriage and family sociologist and author of the acclaimed book, China’s Leftover Women: Late Marriage among Professional Women and its Consequences (Routledge), featured in TIME, CNN, BBC, and more, for no-BS conversations about the stuff that really matters: dating as a high-powered career woman, finding a marriage partner over 30, who's doing the work in the marriage, what's the catch on motherhood and fertility etc.  Whether you're single and skeptical, married and mystified, or parenting through chaos...Let's sort life, one chat at a time!  New episodes every Tuesday! 🔔 Subscribe so you don’t miss an episode!  Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/Watch on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcastTake the quiz: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Love the show? Drop a review! 

  1. From Career Woman to Full-Time Mom: How Kitty Quit Her Job After 20 Years to Raise 3 Kids in Australia

    2D AGO

    From Career Woman to Full-Time Mom: How Kitty Quit Her Job After 20 Years to Raise 3 Kids in Australia

    Send us a text Ever wondered what happens when a high-powered career woman quits her 20-year job in investment banking to become a full-time mom of three—and relocates to Australia? In this raw and inspiring episode, my high school bestie Kitty shares her drastic life transition: from thriving in auditing and legal/compliance roles with helpers handling everything, to hands-on parenting, learning to cook, and navigating postpartum challenges abroad. We dive deep into mom guilt, missing career fulfillment, the joy of bonding with her youngest child, maintaining self-identity as a stay-at-home mom, and how mindset and gratitude made all the difference. If you're a working mom considering quitting, a full-time parent struggling with identity loss, or relocating with kids—this episode is for you! Discover practical tips on adapting to big changes, asking for help, and finding reward in family life. Hit play and join the conversation—perfect for anyone balancing career, motherhood, and personal growth. #FullTimeMom #StayAtHomeMom #WorkingMom #MomLife #CareerChange #MomGuilt #ParentingJourney #RelocationWithKids #HongKongToAustralia #MotherhoodTransition #SAHM #WomenInFinance #PostpartumJourney #MindsetMatters #Gratitude #FamilyFirst #LoveAndLifeSorted 🔑 Key Topics: Career to full-time mom transitionQuitting job after 20 years in accounting and investment bankingRelocating from Hong Kong to Australia with kidsLife without domestic helpersMom guilt and missing first milestonesBonding with children as a stay-at-home momPostpartum recovery and mental health challengesMaintaining self-identity and confidence as a SAHMImportance of mindset, gratitude, and positivityAsking for help and teamwork in parenting✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    33 min
  2. Should Women Make the First Move in Dating? Yes AND No

    DEC 16

    Should Women Make the First Move in Dating? Yes AND No

    Send us a text In this episode of Love and Life, Sorted, Dr. Sandy To dives deep into one of the most debated dating questions: “Should women make the first move?” Drawing from classic advice in "The Rules" by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider (why letting men pursue women matters) and modern insights from "Date-onomics" and “Make Your Move” by Jon Birger (why empowered women need to be more proactive in today's competitive market), Dr. To shares a balanced "yes AND no" approach. Learn practical tips: Wait for clear signs of interest from him first, then reciprocate enthusiastically to encourage pursuit—without chasing. Discover why high-achieving women intimidate men, how demographics stack the odds, and the power of "opening the door a crack" for real connection. Plus, the ultimate real-life example: How Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce turned a missed bracelet moment into an epic love story by blending traditional pursuit with timely reciprocation. If you're navigating modern dating, wondering why good men aren't approaching, or seeking strategies to find lasting love—this episode is for you. Timeless wisdom meets 2025 reality for better relationships. #ShouldWomenMakeTheFirstMove #DatingAdviceForWomen #ModernDating #TaylorSwiftTravisKelce #TheRulesDating #Dateonomics #WomenInDating #RelationshipAdvice #LoveAndLifeSorted #DatingTips2025 #FindLastingLove #EmpoweredWomenDating #TaylorSwiftKelce #PursuitInDating #DatingStrategy 🔑 Key Topics: Should women make the first moveDating advice for womenThe Rules book vs modern datingDate-onomics and gender ratios in datingWhy men get intimidated by successful womenSigns of genuine male interestHow to reciprocate without chasingTaylor Swift and Travis Kelce relationship storyModern marriage market challengesEncouraging men to pursue you✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    26 min
  3. End-of-Year Life Reset | How I Used "Designing Your Life" (Stanford Method) to Pivot My Career & Find Fulfillment

    DEC 9

    End-of-Year Life Reset | How I Used "Designing Your Life" (Stanford Method) to Pivot My Career & Find Fulfillment

    Send us a text Are you feeling stuck in your job, drained by overwork, or wondering what’s next in mid-career or as you approach retirement? In this episode of Love & Life Sorted, Dr. Sandy To shares her raw experience attending the exclusive pilot “Designing Your Work Life” workshop in Hong Kong – based on the New York Times bestselling book Designing Your Life by Stanford professors Bill Burnett & Dave Evans. You’ll discover: Why the end of the year is the perfect time for a total life & career resetThe biggest differences between classic self-help/motivational books and real design-thinking toolsHow to solve problems “like a designer” Why you must throw away your first idea Why artists and creatives feel lonely – and how to combat it The power of “no judgment” brainstorming and building bold prototypesHow to align your Work View & Life View so work energizes instead of drains youIf you’ve ever wanted practical, actionable steps to redesign your career and life, this episode is for you. #DesigningYourLife #LifeDesign #CareerPivot #MidCareerCrisis #WorkLifeBalance #CareerChange #EndOfYearReset #StanfordMethod #StanfordLifeDesignLab #DesignThinking #LifeReset #FindYourPurpose #FulfillmentAtWork #Self-fulfillment #PersonalDevelopment In this episode:  Designing Your Life – Bill Burnett & Dave Evans → https://www.amazon.com/Designing-Your-Life-Well-Lived-Joyful/dp/1101875321 Designing Your Work Life → https://www.amazon.com/Designing-Your-Work-Life-Happiness/dp/0525655247 Official site: https://designingyour.life ✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    26 min
  4. 4 Types of Women in Modern Dating & Marriage (Which One Are You?) |Traditionalists, Maximizers, Satisficers, Innovators

    DEC 2

    4 Types of Women in Modern Dating & Marriage (Which One Are You?) |Traditionalists, Maximizers, Satisficers, Innovators

    Send us a text Which type of woman are you when it comes to love, career, and marriage? In this episode, Dr. Sandy To breaks down the 4 female archetypes in today’s dating world: Traditionalist, Maximizer, Satisficer, and Innovator – and reveals exactly how each type approaches finding a partner, money, career, and family. Discover why some women happily become housewives only if the husband is the breadwinner (Traditionalist); the proactive “Maximizer” women who are more strategic and proactive in finding high-value men (even older, divorced, or cross-cultural); “Satisficer” women who  become the breadwinner and expect total equality (think Hermione Granger & Ron) and “Innovator” women who are looking for companionate relationships more than marriage and are fine raising kids solo (Rachel Green style).  Perfect for single women, married women reassessing their relationship, or anyone confused about modern dating dynamics. 💡Figure out your type (or hybrid) and stop choosing the wrong partners! Take the What's Your Type Quiz at: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz and share your results on our Instagram page @drsandyto.podcast.  #4TypesOfWomen #DatingAdvice #ModernDating #MarriageGoals #TraditionalWife #FemaleBreadwinner #HighValueMan #RelationshipAdvice #LoveAndCareer #SingleMomByChoice #HermioneGranger #RachelGreen #AmyMarch #JessicaHuang #DatingStrategy #WomenInTheir30s #KnowYourType #EgalitarianMarriage #Hypergamy #CareerWoman #LoveAndLifeSorted ✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    20 min
  5. Women Breadwinners | Navigating Role Reversal, Challenges, and Relationship Success

    NOV 25

    Women Breadwinners | Navigating Role Reversal, Challenges, and Relationship Success

    Send us a text In this eye-opening episode of Love and Life Sorted, Dr. Sandy To dives deep into the rise of women as primary breadwinners in modern relationships. Explore the challenges of gender role reversal, including resentment, housework imbalances, and emasculation fears. Learn about "deviance neutralization techniques" from classic sociology research, real-life stories of boss wives, and the difference between involuntary and voluntary breadwinners (aka, Satisficers). Discover practical advice for couples to foster egalitarianism, boost appreciation, and maintain harmony when traditional roles flip. Whether you're a high-earning woman, a stay-at-home husband, or navigating dual-income dynamics, this episode offers insights to strengthen your relationship.  #WomenBreadwinners #GenderRoles #RelationshipAdvice #ModernMarriage #WomenEmpowerment #EgalitarianRelationships #StayAtHomeDads #LoveAndLifeSorted #Satisficers #RoleReversal #BossWives #RelationshipChallenges #MarriageTips #Feminism  🔑Key Topics: Traditional vs. modern gender roles in relationships and marriagesChallenges faced by women breadwinners: Exhaustion, paid work-housework double bind, and partner resentmentDeviance neutralization techniques: Overcompensating through femininity, compliments, evasion, and role (re-)segregationInvoluntary breadwinners: Dealing with unexpected role reversals due to layoffs or career shiftsVoluntary breadwinners (Satisficers): Egalitarianism over economicsAdvice for men in lesser-earner roles: Developing personal skills and passions to overcome insecuritiesReal-life examples from interviews and sociology studies (e.g., Atkinson and Boles on “WASPs”: “Wives As Senior Partners")Tips for couples: Verbal appreciation, negotiation, and making the most of reversed roles✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    31 min
  6. How Old is Too Old to Have a Child? Pros, Cons, and Real-Life Stories on Late Parenthood

    NOV 18

    How Old is Too Old to Have a Child? Pros, Cons, and Real-Life Stories on Late Parenthood

    Send us a text In this episode of Love and Life, Sorted (formerly Date Right 4 Your Type), we dive into the controversial question: How old is too old to have a child? Drawing from a real Hong Kong case of a 58-year-old woman welcoming her second baby, we explore the challenges of late pregnancy, including declining energy levels, limited time with your kids, and the emotional burden on children. We discuss fertility journeys, biological clocks, egg freezing, adoption options, and why waiting too long might be selfish—even for men who don't face the same ticking clock. Whether you're planning a family, considering solo parenthood, or curious about modern fertility miracles like IVF, this honest chat offers practical advice and heartfelt insights.  #LateParenthood #FertilityJourney #HowOldToHaveABaby #BiologicalClock #IVFStories #SoloParenting #EggFreezing #ParentingAdvice #FamilyPlanning #LoveAndLifeSorted #RelationshipsAndFamily #AdoptionOptions #ModernParenthood #WomensHealth  🔑Key Topics The case of a 58-year-old woman having her second child Health risks, energy levels, and recovery challenges in late pregnanciesEmotional and practical burdens on children of older parents, including limited time together and caregiving responsibilitiesWhy having kids late might be seen as selfish, from both women's and men's perspectivesFertility options like egg freezing, IVF, adoption, and solo parenting for those who haven't found a partner“The Stork and I” single motherhood coaching for women considering solo parentingPhilosophical questions on why we have children and the importance of considering the child's long-term well-beingAdvice on taking control of your fertility journey to avoid regrets✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    31 min
  7. 3 Reasons Matchmaking Is the Best Way for Finding Love | Singles' Day Special

    NOV 11

    3 Reasons Matchmaking Is the Best Way for Finding Love | Singles' Day Special

    Send us a text On this Singles' Day (11.11) episode of Love & Life, Sorted (previously Date Right 4 Your Type), Dr. Sandy To reveals why matchmaking is the most successful way to find a lifelong partner—outperforming random encounters, dating apps, and rom-com "meet-cutes." Discover the R.A.E. framework: Reliability (vetted character to avoid frauds like the Tinder Swindler), Accuracy (matching exact criteria like height, income, or zodiac signs), and Exclusivity (headhunter-style intros for high-achievers, like Lady Gaga's mom-set-up). Dr. Sandy To shares her own matchmaking success story (meeting her husband after 20 years!), real couple wins, and tips to overcome matchmaking stigma. Perfect for busy professionals tired of swiping. Stop wasting time—get introduced to quality matches! Subscribe for more dating psychology, like/comment your criteria, and tag a friend who needs this.  #Matchmaking #SinglesDay #1111 #DatingTips #FindLove #RelationshipAdvice #ChinaSingles #ZodiacCompatibility #VirgoCancer #BlindDate #PartnerCriteria #LadyGagaEngaged #IndianMatchmaker #JewishMatchmaker #Love&LifeSorted #GoodOnPaper 🔑Key Topics Singles' Day China (11.11 bare branches) Reliability in partner vetting (Tinder Swindler, Good on Paper movie) Accuracy with criteria (height, income, zodiac compatibility, Virgo-Cancer        match) Exclusivity for high-achievers (headhunter analogy, Lady Gaga story)Matchmaking and blind date success storiesOvercoming matchmaking stigmaR.A.E. framework for successful relationshipsNetflix shows: Indian Matchmaker, Jewish Matchmaker Meet-cutes in rom-coms vs real life (Sex and the City, Serendipity)✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    31 min
  8. Overcoming Mom Guilt | Reclaiming Your Identity as a Career Mom in Motherhood

    NOV 4

    Overcoming Mom Guilt | Reclaiming Your Identity as a Career Mom in Motherhood

    Send us a text In this heartfelt episode of "Date Right for Your Type," Dr. Sandy To dives deep into the raw realities of motherhood for career women. From the long journey to finding a partner and starting a family, to the shocking loss of self-identity when you're suddenly just "someone's mom," Dr. To shares her personal struggles with mom guilt—from hyperthyroidism in pregnancy and breastfeeding challenges to the loneliness of full-time caregiving and the tough decision to return to work. Discover how to balance family life with passion projects or career pursuits without losing yourself. If you're a mom feeling torn between your child, your ambitions, and that ever-present guilt, this episode offers relatable stories, practical insights, and encouragement to reclaim your life. Tune in for an empowering conversation on work-life balance, self-fulfilment, and embracing the "sweet contradiction" of modern motherhood. Perfect for working moms, new parents, and anyone navigating family dynamics.  #MomGuilt #MotherhoodJourney #CareerMoms #WorkLifeBalance #ReclaimYourIdentity #ParentingStruggles #NewMomLife #BreastfeedingChallenges #FamilyAndCareer #WomenEmpowerment #PodcastForMoms #DateRight4YourType #DrSandyTo #ModernMotherhood #SelfCareForMoms #MentalHealth #hyperthyroidism 🔑Key Topics The challenges career women face in finding partners and building families later in lifeIdentity loss in motherhood: From being called by your name to "someone's mom" or "Mrs_____"Mom guilt at every stage: Pregnancy health issues, breastfeeding struggles, and missing milestones while workingThe loneliness and alienation of early motherhood, even with support aroundReclaiming your identity through passion projects, hobbies, or returning to workBalancing work-life harmony: Accepting guilt as inevitable while pursuing personal fulfilment for the sake of mental healthEncouragement for moms to support each other in their unique journeys✨Let’s sort life, one chat at a time! Hit the subscribe button 🔔 so you don't miss an episode of Love & Life, Sorted - for your weekly dose of no-BS chats on relationships, family life, self-growth, and modern dating. Follow @drsandyto.podcast on Instagram for more conversation and fun stuff! 🤩 New episodes every Tuesday! Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/ Find out your type: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Watch on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcast?si=zBhv0QwBnOLkJm2l Love the show? Drop a review!

    32 min
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About

A Cambridge PhD sociologist's intimate, no-BS talk about love, family and everything in between.  Join Dr. Sandy To, marriage and family sociologist and author of the acclaimed book, China’s Leftover Women: Late Marriage among Professional Women and its Consequences (Routledge), featured in TIME, CNN, BBC, and more, for no-BS conversations about the stuff that really matters: dating as a high-powered career woman, finding a marriage partner over 30, who's doing the work in the marriage, what's the catch on motherhood and fertility etc.  Whether you're single and skeptical, married and mystified, or parenting through chaos...Let's sort life, one chat at a time!  New episodes every Tuesday! 🔔 Subscribe so you don’t miss an episode!  Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drsandyto.podcast/Watch on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@drsandyto.podcastTake the quiz: https://www.sandyto.com/types-quiz Love the show? Drop a review! 

Information

  • Creator
    Dr. Sandy To
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    15
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Love & Life, Sorted
  • Show Website
    Love & Life, Sorted